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DaShen

Lifer
Dec 1, 2000
10,710
1
0
Originally posted by: jimbob200521
Originally posted by: KLin
Two engineers are walking to class when one says, ?Where?d you get such a great bike?? The second engineer replies, ?Well yesterday I was on my way home when this beautiful girl rode in front of me, tossed the bike and her clothes to the ground and declared, ?Take what you want!?? The first engineer nods in approval, ?Good choice - the clothes probably wouldn?t have fit.?
:disgust: :laugh:
That is what I was thinking....

Why didn't the engineer take the clothes as well and just eBay it? ;) just kidding. hehe Chalk it up to geekiness.
 

Zenmervolt

Elite member
Oct 22, 2000
24,510
11
81
Originally posted by: KLin
Two engineers are walking to class when one says, ?Where?d you get such a great bike?? The second engineer replies, ?Well yesterday I was on my way home when this beautiful girl rode in front of me, tossed the bike and her clothes to the ground and declared, ?Take what you want!?? The first engineer nods in approval, ?Good choice - the clothes probably wouldn?t have fit.?
If he had the bike, why was he walking?

ZV
 

AgaBoogaBoo

Lifer
Feb 16, 2003
26,096
1
0
Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
Originally posted by: KLin
Two engineers are walking to class when one says, ?Where?d you get such a great bike?? The second engineer replies, ?Well yesterday I was on my way home when this beautiful girl rode in front of me, tossed the bike and her clothes to the ground and declared, ?Take what you want!?? The first engineer nods in approval, ?Good choice - the clothes probably wouldn?t have fit.?
If he had the bike, why was he walking?

ZV
It was the continuation of a previous discussion or situation where he saw his friend's bike. It's a joke you nut :p
 

Zenmervolt

Elite member
Oct 22, 2000
24,510
11
81
Originally posted by: AgaBoogaBoo
Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
Originally posted by: KLin
Two engineers are walking to class when one says, ?Where?d you get such a great bike?? The second engineer replies, ?Well yesterday I was on my way home when this beautiful girl rode in front of me, tossed the bike and her clothes to the ground and declared, ?Take what you want!?? The first engineer nods in approval, ?Good choice - the clothes probably wouldn?t have fit.?
If he had the bike, why was he walking?

ZV
It was the continuation of a previous discussion or situation where he saw his friend's bike. It's a joke you nut :p
This is what happens when you tell a geek a joke. :p It's why I'm not in demand at parties. :p

ZV
 

EKKC

Diamond Member
May 31, 2005
5,895
0
0
Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
"Did you hear about the programmer who died in the shower? The instructions on the shampoo said 'lather, rinse, repeat'."

ZV
ROFL!
 

nakedfrog

No Lifer
Apr 3, 2001
52,089
4,518
126
A neutron walks into a bar and asks:
?Hey, how much for a beer??
The bartender says, ?For you, no charge.?
 

Kyteland

Diamond Member
Dec 30, 2002
5,747
1
0
Why did Intel call their new chip "Pentium"? Because when you added 100 to 486, you got 586.657654132167...

What do you get when you cross a Lion with a Tiger?
A line perpendicular to both.

To an optimist, the glass is half full. To a pessimist, the glass is half empty. To an engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
 

Leros

Lifer
Jul 11, 2004
21,867
7
81
Originally posted by: Kyteland
Why did Intel call their new chip "Pentium"? Because when you added 100 to 486, you got 586.657654132167...

What do you get when you cross a Lion with a Tiger?
A line perpendicular to both.

To an optimist, the glass is half full. To a pessimist, the glass is half empty. To an engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
I don't get the pentium one.
 

Lash444

Golden Member
Sep 17, 2002
1,708
63
91
How do you catch a bear?

First you dig a hole, and you fill it full of ashes. Then you surround it with peas. When the bear goes to take a pea, you kick it in the ash-hole.
 

KLin

Lifer
Feb 29, 2000
29,419
30
91
Originally posted by: Lash444
How do you catch a bear?

First you dig a hole, and you fill it full of ashes. Then you surround it with peas. When the bear goes to take a pea, you kick it in the ash-hole.
That's not a geek joke.
 

Rastus

Diamond Member
Oct 10, 1999
4,704
3
0
Originally posted by: Leros
Originally posted by: Kyteland
Why did Intel call their new chip "Pentium"? Because when you added 100 to 486, you got 586.657654132167...

What do you get when you cross a Lion with a Tiger?
A line perpendicular to both.

To an optimist, the glass is half full. To a pessimist, the glass is half empty. To an engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
I don't get the pentium one.
fdiv bug of the pentium60

 

Jeff7

Lifer
Jan 4, 2001
41,599
17
81
Originally posted by: Leros
Originally posted by: Kyteland
Why did Intel call their new chip "Pentium"? Because when you added 100 to 486, you got 586.657654132167...
I don't get the pentium one.
I think it was one of their early Pentiums that had some kind of computational bug, where if it did decimal calculations, it could give a wrong answer. Wikipedia link




Here's another one I saw awhile ago online, and here it is again, courtesy of this site, with a little addition:
A constant function and e^x are walking on Broadway. Then suddenly the constant function sees a differential operator approaching and runs away. so e to-the x follows him and asks why the hurry.

"Well, you see, there's this diff.operator coming this way, and when we meet, he'll differentiate me and nothing will be left of me...!"

"Ah," says e^x, "he won't bother ME, I'm e to-the x!" and he walks on. Of course he meets the differential operator after a short distance.

e^x : "Hi, I'm e^x"

diff.op. : "Hi, I'm d/dy"

e^x : "Oh snap."
 

Lash444

Golden Member
Sep 17, 2002
1,708
63
91
Originally posted by: KLin
Originally posted by: Lash444
How do you catch a bear?

First you dig a hole, and you fill it full of ashes. Then you surround it with peas. When the bear goes to take a pea, you kick it in the ash-hole.
That's not a geek joke.
It is to me, I don't tell a joke anymore geeky than that!
 

andy04

Senior member
Dec 14, 2006
999
0
71
Originally posted by: All

There are 10 types of people in this world, those who know binary and those who don't

How is a computer like an erection?
It stays up as long as you don't screw with it!

Baby, I wish I was your integral, cuz I'd be under all your curves.

God is real, unless declared integer

If you're not part of the solution, you are part of the precipitate.

"Why did the Comp. Engineer get X-mas and Halloween mixed up? A: Because Oct(31) == Dec(25)!"
OMG when i first heard that and got it i thought i was so 1337

i heard this pickup line on beauty and the geek
i wish you were sin^2(x) and i was cos^2(x) because together we would be 1

Two engineers are walking to class when one says, ?Where?d you get such a great bike?? The second engineer replies, ?Well yesterday I was on my way home when this beautiful girl rode in front of me, tossed the bike and her clothes to the ground and declared, ?Take what you want!?? The first engineer nods in approval, ?Good choice - the clothes probably wouldn?t have fit.?

"Did you hear about the programmer who died in the shower? The instructions on the shampoo said 'lather, rinse, repeat'."

Whats purple and commutes?
an abelian grape.

What did the 0 say to the 8?
nice belt.

A neutron walks into a bar and asks:
?Hey, how much for a beer??
The bartender says, ?For you, no charge.?

Why did Intel call their new chip "Pentium"? Because when you added 100 to 486, you got 586.657654132167... (fdiv bug of the pentium60)

What do you get when you cross a Lion with a Tiger?
A line perpendicular to both.

First you dig a hole, and you fill it full of ashes. Then you surround it with peas. When the bear goes to take a pea, you kick it in the ash-hole.

To an optimist, the glass is half full. To a pessimist, the glass is half empty. To an engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

A constant function and e^x are walking on Broadway. Then suddenly the constant function sees a differential operator approaching and runs away. so e to-the x follows him and asks why the hurry.
"Well, you see, there's this diff.operator coming this way, and when we meet, he'll differentiate me and nothing will be left of me...!"
"Ah," says e^x, "he won't bother ME, I'm e to-the x!" and he walks on. Of course he meets the differential operator after a short distance.
e^x : "Hi, I'm e^x"
diff.op. : "Hi, I'm d/dy"
e^x : "Oh snap."
Good Ones keep going :laugh:

 

NuroMancer

Golden Member
Nov 8, 2004
1,684
1
76
Originally posted by: andy04
Originally posted by: All

There are 10 types of people in this world, those who know binary and those who don't

How is a computer like an erection?
It stays up as long as you don't screw with it!

Baby, I wish I was your integral, cuz I'd be under all your curves.

God is real, unless declared integer

If you're not part of the solution, you are part of the precipitate.

"Why did the Comp. Engineer get X-mas and Halloween mixed up? A: Because Oct(31) == Dec(25)!"
OMG when i first heard that and got it i thought i was so 1337

i heard this pickup line on beauty and the geek
i wish you were sin^2(x) and i was cos^2(x) because together we would be 1

Two engineers are walking to class when one says, ?Where?d you get such a great bike?? The second engineer replies, ?Well yesterday I was on my way home when this beautiful girl rode in front of me, tossed the bike and her clothes to the ground and declared, ?Take what you want!?? The first engineer nods in approval, ?Good choice - the clothes probably wouldn?t have fit.?

"Did you hear about the programmer who died in the shower? The instructions on the shampoo said 'lather, rinse, repeat'."

Whats purple and commutes?
an abelian grape.

What did the 0 say to the 8?
nice belt.

A neutron walks into a bar and asks:
?Hey, how much for a beer??
The bartender says, ?For you, no charge.?

Why did Intel call their new chip "Pentium"? Because when you added 100 to 486, you got 586.657654132167... (fdiv bug of the pentium60)

What do you get when you cross a Lion with a Tiger?
A line perpendicular to both.

First you dig a hole, and you fill it full of ashes. Then you surround it with peas. When the bear goes to take a pea, you kick it in the ash-hole.

To an optimist, the glass is half full. To a pessimist, the glass is half empty. To an engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

A constant function and e^x are walking on Broadway. Then suddenly the constant function sees a differential operator approaching and runs away. so e to-the x follows him and asks why the hurry.
"Well, you see, there's this diff.operator coming this way, and when we meet, he'll differentiate me and nothing will be left of me...!"
"Ah," says e^x, "he won't bother ME, I'm e to-the x!" and he walks on. Of course he meets the differential operator after a short distance.
e^x : "Hi, I'm e^x"
diff.op. : "Hi, I'm d/dy"
e^x : "Oh snap."
Good Ones keep going :laugh:
Oh wow.
 

Kyteland

Diamond Member
Dec 30, 2002
5,747
1
0
Originally posted by: Leros
Originally posted by: Kyteland
Why did Intel call their new chip "Pentium"? Because when you added 100 to 486, you got 586.657654132167...

What do you get when you cross a Lion with a Tiger?
A line perpendicular to both.

To an optimist, the glass is half full. To a pessimist, the glass is half empty. To an engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
I don't get the pentium one.
Not geek enough? :Q
 

Kyteland

Diamond Member
Dec 30, 2002
5,747
1
0
Originally posted by: Rastus
Originally posted by: Leros
Originally posted by: Kyteland
Why did Intel call their new chip "Pentium"? Because when you added 100 to 486, you got 586.657654132167...
I don't get the pentium one.
fdiv bug of the pentium60
More along those lines:
Q: Did you hear about the new "morning after" pill being developed as a replacement for RU-486???
A: Its called RU-Pentium. It causes the embryo to not divide correctly.

Q: According to Intel, the Pentium conforms to the IEEE standards 754 and 854 for floating point arithmetic. If you fly in aircraft designed using a Pentium, what is the correct pronunciation of "IEEE"?
A: Aaaaaaaiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeee!

Q: How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 1.99904274017, but that's close enough for non-technical people.

At Intel, Quality is Job 0.99989960954
 

reverend boltron

Senior member
Nov 18, 2004
945
0
76
What did the mathematician say after Thanksgiving dinner?

sqrt(-1/64)

A biologist, a physicist and a mathematician were sitting in a street cafe watching the crowd. Across the street they saw a man and a woman entering a building. Ten minutes later they reappeared together with a third person.

The biologist said, "They must have bred while they were in there."
The physicist said, "Oh noes! An error in measurement."
The mathematician said, "If one more person enters the building, it will be empty again."
 

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