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Does your wife work?
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kranky
Elite Member
My wife worked at a hellhole company for 20 years and I asked her why she didn't quit. She never thought we could afford it, even though I'm careful to have a yearly review of our finances, and she never asked what I thought about it.
So she quit, and spends her time volunteering, babysitting for friends, helping the elderly with their yardwork/snow removal, and she's happier than she's ever been - ever. She doesn't lounge around the house all day - she's up by 7AM and gets home in time to get dinner going unless it's a babysitting gig that is running late.
She makes a real difference in people's lives every day, far more than I do even though I get paid for what I do.
On a side note, there is a real danger to counting on two incomes to live a particular lifestyle. If one person loses his/her job, or is temporarily disabled, most people don't have a safety net to cover it. They tend to spend all of both incomes. If I lost my job, she could go to work temporarily and we'd get by.
So she quit, and spends her time volunteering, babysitting for friends, helping the elderly with their yardwork/snow removal, and she's happier than she's ever been - ever. She doesn't lounge around the house all day - she's up by 7AM and gets home in time to get dinner going unless it's a babysitting gig that is running late.
She makes a real difference in people's lives every day, far more than I do even though I get paid for what I do.
On a side note, there is a real danger to counting on two incomes to live a particular lifestyle. If one person loses his/her job, or is temporarily disabled, most people don't have a safety net to cover it. They tend to spend all of both incomes. If I lost my job, she could go to work temporarily and we'd get by.
Hey platinum just wondering how much a decent house would go for in Jersey, we currently live in Mass and my wife who is from CT is always pissed that housing is so damn expensive here and always mentions Jersy as she feels it will be far more affordable..which I find ironic as you mention a smaller townhouse is 350K and that is about what we are paying here in MA for a 1,250 SQ/FT brand new construction townhouse with two car garage (well $370 here), so it seems as if my wife might not know what is what....
With regards to working, we both work and we both like living a nice lifestyle, however I know that both she and I would love not working 🙂.. if it were financially possibly for both of us to not work, or for her to just stay home then that would be fine by me, the only thing I would want is that she doesn;t get lazy, and I hope she would expect the same of me.
Actually, the huge irony is that people like you who partied their asses off and made a career of drunken hookups are why I have a job.
My current place of employment.
I know the sores and painful discharge are tough to deal with, but just think how you're helping provide for my family in your own small way. 😀
PS- that was a long time to be gone to only run two miles. I thought you were in shape?
Homerboy
Lifer
My wife stays at home and works... 2 kids, 2 cats a house... and she runs a (very) small business of her own.
We would do and WILL DO anything and everything to keep her at home with the children, where a mother (not neccessarily a wife) should be.
If we didnt have children? Well she;d be working likely. Unless I was pullin in $5M a year... which Im not. 🙁
We would do and WILL DO anything and everything to keep her at home with the children, where a mother (not neccessarily a wife) should be.
If we didnt have children? Well she;d be working likely. Unless I was pullin in $5M a year... which Im not. 🙁
blackdogdeek
Lifer
actually i find that they consider more that he has direction(working, getting education, etc.) than how much he is making.
Homerboy
Lifer
My wife considered it... I wasn't making SQUAT when we got engaged... in fact I was just starting a new job that paid less (ironically it ended up being a very well paying job...)
Many of my friends have wives that make more than them, or for that matter together dont make squat.
Maybe you meet too many shallow women?
on one hand i think a mother should be home with her young children
on the other hand i would go crazy being home all day with nobody but my kids
i really don't know.
edit: when i get married it will be for love and not money. if my husband wants to stay home and take care of the babies, thats fine too.
on the other hand i would go crazy being home all day with nobody but my kids
i really don't know.
edit: when i get married it will be for love and not money. if my husband wants to stay home and take care of the babies, thats fine too.
Electric Amish
Elite Member
My wife currently does not work, but it's due to illness, not want.
purbeast0
No Lifer
lol this thread is great ... the OP is a sad sad man. I like how he thinks everyone is on here all day doing nothing with their lives. i wonder if he realizes that probably around %80 (guestimate) of the posters are currently at work. I'm at home right now cause I just finished my first exam at 10 and got home at 11, and am takin a break for studyin for my last final in my college career.
as far as the topic is going, i think it all depends on the lifestyle you want. my current girlfriend I have now is a beautiful nicaraguan girl who is very motivated and a very hard worker. she just finished real estate classes and is going to take the state test soon, and already has a guy lined up to hire her when she gets her liscense. meanwhile, she works at AAA courrier service as well as the Coach store in the mall. At Coach they actually want her to stay and become a manager, but she has the real estate thing planned. So as you can see, she has a few options.
I am only 22 and she's only 20, and we are far from marriage, but I would really like things to workout and be with her down the road in about 4 or 5 years and marry her. I am about to graduate and get a full time job somewhere, so with both of our incomes we would do very well. but i'm still young, and slightly starting to plan the future, hopefully with her 🙂
as far as the topic is going, i think it all depends on the lifestyle you want. my current girlfriend I have now is a beautiful nicaraguan girl who is very motivated and a very hard worker. she just finished real estate classes and is going to take the state test soon, and already has a guy lined up to hire her when she gets her liscense. meanwhile, she works at AAA courrier service as well as the Coach store in the mall. At Coach they actually want her to stay and become a manager, but she has the real estate thing planned. So as you can see, she has a few options.
I am only 22 and she's only 20, and we are far from marriage, but I would really like things to workout and be with her down the road in about 4 or 5 years and marry her. I am about to graduate and get a full time job somewhere, so with both of our incomes we would do very well. but i'm still young, and slightly starting to plan the future, hopefully with her 🙂
Well Tec I won't dump on yah, you asked a question lots of people ask.
I'm 40 and have lived, am married and have kids.
If you buy into consumerism then yes you will be compelled to 'have it all' What you find though and maybe cause you haven't had career jobs before is that things won't buy happiness.
I was raised by parents who worked full time and then some and like slag swore I wouldn't do that to my own kids. Because all children want is love and your time, this is how you should focus your relationship.
priority one is kids, two is your relationship, and three is the money.
I'm not saying the money doesn't hurt and 80% of divorces site money as one of the major contributing factors. If your mature you learn to live within your means and budget and realize that the life you had before kids is not the one you will lead now you will be much happier.
My wife stays home with the kids, she has the potential to earn as much as I do but we have chosen for her to stay with the kids til they are school age. Many studies have shown they are better off in the long run for this. When she does go back to work since we have learned to live off one wage anything she brings in will be a bonus. It is harder to stay at home and if you don't believe it , try for a week.
A marriage is a partnership of equals not , who can bring what to the table.
I also can understand the idea of having a safegard by having someone as backup in case the main bread winner loses a job or something but if you keep yourself as debt free as possible you won't beleive what you can get by on, but as a decision point on who you'll marry? Sounds a little too self serving when you are supposed to be entering a partnership based on love, shared values and so on.
I would suggest you should marry somebody your intellectual equal more than monetary as those dinner conversations year after year can get pretty boring if they have nothing to say.
My 2
I'm 40 and have lived, am married and have kids.
If you buy into consumerism then yes you will be compelled to 'have it all' What you find though and maybe cause you haven't had career jobs before is that things won't buy happiness.
I was raised by parents who worked full time and then some and like slag swore I wouldn't do that to my own kids. Because all children want is love and your time, this is how you should focus your relationship.
priority one is kids, two is your relationship, and three is the money.
I'm not saying the money doesn't hurt and 80% of divorces site money as one of the major contributing factors. If your mature you learn to live within your means and budget and realize that the life you had before kids is not the one you will lead now you will be much happier.
My wife stays home with the kids, she has the potential to earn as much as I do but we have chosen for her to stay with the kids til they are school age. Many studies have shown they are better off in the long run for this. When she does go back to work since we have learned to live off one wage anything she brings in will be a bonus. It is harder to stay at home and if you don't believe it , try for a week.
A marriage is a partnership of equals not , who can bring what to the table.
I also can understand the idea of having a safegard by having someone as backup in case the main bread winner loses a job or something but if you keep yourself as debt free as possible you won't beleive what you can get by on, but as a decision point on who you'll marry? Sounds a little too self serving when you are supposed to be entering a partnership based on love, shared values and so on.
I would suggest you should marry somebody your intellectual equal more than monetary as those dinner conversations year after year can get pretty boring if they have nothing to say.
My 2
purbeast0
No Lifer
LoL yea its funny ... I was talking with my manager about that 🙂, how she could try to sweet talk the customers and try to use her power as a woman to sell.
The one thing that came up when I was discussing that with my manager is that she will probably be selling alot of houess to couples, so it's not just like its gonna be a guy seeing a hot girl and buy it heh. but still, she is very friendly and beautiful and very talkative. she was the best sales person at her job at Wilsons Leather (she wsa there for 3 years before i knew her, they wanted her to stay for manager position) and now she hsa been at Coach for only like 4 weeks, and they already mentioned manager position to her 🙂
WHipLAsh13
Golden Member
I think this is total BS. I live on Long Island which is just as expensive if not more than NJ. My wife stays home and takes care of my daughter. If you think that is not contributing then you have something wrong with you. IMHO Half the problem with the society today is that the mothers are all running off to work, letting strangers raise their kids based on their values not yours. This is definately a decision that should be 100% up to the woman.
MomAndSkoorbaby
Diamond Member
I am a wife and I work. I am off on leave right now due to issues with this pregnancy...first child due in August. Once she is born, do I plan on staying home? YES. For 6 months or so to make sure she gets all the breastmilk and me that she can get. THEN I will return to work, probably part time at first, and continue to work...since I am a nurse, I will probably do a more flexi scheduling so that Skoorb and I don't have to put her in daycare and we can spend the most time with her as possible. 🙂
Everyone thinks differently on this issue of stay at home moms and daycare! Be respectful of different opinions people!
Everyone thinks differently on this issue of stay at home moms and daycare! Be respectful of different opinions people!
Depends on the kind of money you make and your situation. Ideally if I made enough my wife would not work. However kids would change that as if we had them I would want her to stay home for a while until he was a bit older, then maybe parttime job. But no kids + no money = she be workin her ass just as hard as me. The more important thing is she has to realize if she doesnt work then the budget has to be severely different. Cus I swear to god the first thing my ex did when she lost her job was go out and buy crap all the time. She was just exceptionally bad with money though, but I speak from experience.
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