Wow. My friend actually got married after 90 days...

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highland145

Lifer
Oct 12, 2009
43,911
6,279
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I was 32.
1st date 1/1996.
Married 5/18/1996.
15 years, next month.
10 year old, so no shotgun required.


Mom nearly stroked out because I was a "confirmed" bachelor.:sneaky:

Edit:1996 not 2006.o_O
 
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rh71

No Lifer
Aug 28, 2001
52,844
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this forum allows inline pics... let's us scan a thread for its worthiness much faster.
 

ZOOYUKA

Platinum Member
Jan 24, 2005
2,460
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Sounds like you are just jealous some guy did in 90 days what you couldn't do in 7 years. Wish her the best and move on with your life.
 

MotionMan

Lifer
Jan 11, 2006
17,123
12
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I was 32.
1st date 1/1996.
Married 5/18/1996.
15 years, next month.
10 year old, so no shotgun required.


Mom nearly stroked out because I was a "confirmed" bachelor.:sneaky:

I think the likelihood of this happening and it being successful goes up as you get older.

My wife and I met and started dating in our teens. We waited until we were done with college and grad school before getting married.

On the other hand, after grad school (so we were in our late twenties), we introduced one of my childhood friends to one of our college friends (we did a double-date) and they got married a only year later.

With love, there is no perfect formula. However, IMO, 90 days seems a little too short at any age.

MotionMan
 
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ShawnD1

Lifer
May 24, 2003
15,987
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You got married after 90 days.
You have been married ~28 years.
You have a ~27 year old son.

Shotgun wedding?

MotionMan
lol. That's awesome :thumbsup:


Forget time before marrying. Activities is where it counts. My brother didn't know his girlfriend was totally insane until they lived together.
 

Born2bwire

Diamond Member
Oct 28, 2005
9,840
6
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I don't care how you slice it, 90 days is just damn foolish.

Hell, in this day and age, what's the point to rush into marriage at all? There isn't much of a stigma in society for a couple to live together. There are even people on this board that claim to have a relationship that even resulted in children and they still did not marry. Is it because the fiscal year is ending soon and you want that tax break?
 

highland145

Lifer
Oct 12, 2009
43,911
6,279
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I think the likelihood of this happening and it being successful goes up as you get older.
.

MotionMan
Guaranteed, if I were younger, it would have never worked. Too selfish, even taking into account that she's a couple(+) of quality notches above me.
 

jlee

Lifer
Sep 12, 2001
48,517
223
106
this forum allows inline pics... let's us scan a thread for its worthiness much faster.

Dammit, I didn't even think of that. So much time wasted. :(

And unless I'm missing something, all pcgeek is trying to say is that an (absolute) statement such as 'getting married after 90 days will never work' is wrong. He's not saying it's a good idea - just that it "can" work, contrary to what some people here are claiming.
 

MotionMan

Lifer
Jan 11, 2006
17,123
12
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Dammit, I didn't even think of that. So much time wasted. :(

And unless I'm missing something, all pcgeek is trying to say is that an (absolute) statement such as 'getting married after 90 days will never work' is wrong. He's not saying it's a good idea - just that it "can" work, contrary to what some people here are claiming.

Yeah, he is being a little too defensive (note the gratuitous comment about how his son is "well adjusted".)

MotionMan
 

allisolm

Elite Member
Administrator
Jan 2, 2001
25,067
4,509
136
Pcgeek11, highland145 and me. The exceptions are adding up.

first date end of March
engaged end of April
college let out in May and we went to separate states. Saw each other once for 2 days before the wedding at end of August.

That was even more than 28 years ago. He still calls me "most gorgeous" (so, okay, maybe his eyesight is beginning to go ;) ) and I still think he's the best looking man I know.

Were we lucky or did we each just recognize a person that would make us happy? Who knows - whatever it was, it worked.
 

highland145

Lifer
Oct 12, 2009
43,911
6,279
136
Pcgeek11, highland145 and me. The exceptions are adding up.

first date end of March
engaged end of April
college let out in May and we went to separate states. Saw each other once for 2 days before the wedding at end of August.

That was even more than 28 years ago. He still calls me "most gorgeous" (so, okay, maybe his eyesight is beginning to go ;) ) and I still think he's the best looking man I know.

Were we lucky or did we each just recognize a person that would make us happy? Who knows - whatever it was, it worked.
Allisolm and Motion, excuse the brain cramp. Edited my post 1996 not 2006. Don't tell the wife.
 

Mxylplyx

Diamond Member
Mar 21, 2007
4,197
101
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Getting married during the honeymoon phase of a relationship while you still get laid everyday is dumb as hell. They probably haven't even farted around each other yet. He'll have a wakeup call when he finally gets around to walking in the bathroom after she just dropped a big deuce.
 
Nov 29, 2006
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It's not my place to determine if they are stupid or not. Again it depends on how well I know them as to what my opinion would be. It has certainly worked for me. I'm sure I am not the only one. I know more people that dated and lived together for years and were divorced in a year or two.



And you know this how?

My wife and I did. So that blows your theory all to hell now doesn't it. I'm speaking from real life experience, you are speaking from ... well I don't know where.

Have you ever been married? Had a girlfriend?

This subject is like people that have never had children lecturing about how to raise children. Fact is they aren't qualified to discuss it. Period.


Just because someone doesnt have kids doesnt mean they dont know how they would raise them when that time comes. Lame arguement.
 

MotionMan

Lifer
Jan 11, 2006
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Just because someone doesnt have kids doesnt mean they dont know how they would raise them when that time comes. Lame arguement.

Not lame. First of all, no one can tell someone the "proper" way to raise another's children because every parent and every child is different. More importantly to you point, though we may have ideas of how we will raise our children, one never really knows until you do it. I am a very different parent than I planned to be, as are many of my friends.

MotionMan
 

silverpig

Lifer
Jul 29, 2001
27,703
11
81
Hehe fair enough. But yeah, 90 days is awfully short. Makes a great story when i works out, but I'd be willing to bet it's rare. I wonder if someone has ever made a chart that plots courtship time against length of marriage.

Edit - best I could find was this vague article.

I bet it would go exactly the opposite of what you would expect. Arranged marriages are very successful comparatively.
 

MotionMan

Lifer
Jan 11, 2006
17,123
12
81
I bet it would go exactly the opposite of what you would expect. Arranged marriages are very successful comparatively.

Because they come with a sense of duty and there is (was) no option of divorce.

They stay together, but are they happy?

MotionMan
 

silverpig

Lifer
Jul 29, 2001
27,703
11
81
My parents got married after just a few weeks. They'll be married 34 years this summer.

My ex-gf met a guy and was "engaged" in 2 days. They got married 6 months later and divorced soon after.

My wife and I got engaged after just over a year of dating, and were married 8 months later.

This has been another episode of silverpig's annals of anecdotal evidence.
 
Oct 27, 2007
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I bet it would go exactly the opposite of what you would expect. Arranged marriages are very successful comparatively.
Arranged marriages tend to go hand-in-hand with strict religious principles that forbid divorce. I'd be more interested in a study that controlled for such cultural variables.