"The Defective Brain. It's A Feature Not A Bug!"
as opposed to the pseudo-intellectual emotional bowel movement presented by the op, which by the way simply showed conservatives being more attuned to the environment than the pussies, er progressives, let's take a look at how the average comrade reacts to a stressful situation. hoping in doing so to help us gain insight into the truly malformed and perverted amongst us. liberals.
On the night of July 18, 1969 a party was held on Chappaquiddick Island in which campaign volunteers called 'Boiler Room Girls' mingled.
These volunteers had worked on Robert Kennedy's campaign in 1968, so the party was a reunion. 1 of the 'Boiler Room Girls' was Kopechne.
Kennedy, a married man, and Kopechne left the party together at around 11:15 pm. Their whereabouts for the next hour are unknown.
About 12:45 that night, a local police officer parked in his car sees a dark car turn into a cemetery road and stop. He figures it's lost.
The police officer gets out of his own car & approaches, calling out. The dark car immediately speeds off at a high rate of speed.
Very drunk & in a car with a young woman who is not his wife, & with a suspended license, Kennedy doesn't want to get stopped by a cop.
Kennedy is not familiar with Chappaquiddick's roads. The thinks he's on the road to the ferry now, but he's not. He's on Dike Road.
In the dark,and likely checking his rearview to ensure the cop is not following, Kennedy does not see the road turn & the bridge coming.
Dike Road Bridge is a wooden bridge with no guardrail. Kennedy drives right off of the road. The car flips in the air.
Kennedy's Oldsmobile Delmont '88 lands on it's roof in about 6 feet of water. Kennedy immediately manages to exit the submerged car.
For the next 9+ hours, of all that followed, 1 fact is indisputable: Kennedy did not report the accident.
Kennedy leaves the scene of the accident, walking back to the cottage where the party was being held that he had left an hr & 1/2 before.
On his journey back to the cottage, Kennedy passes several houses with lights on. He makes no attempt to call for help.
Getting in a car, the 3 men return to accident scene, and make several attempts to reach Kopechne. They can't get to her.
Both men tell Kennedy it's time to report the accident, get professional help in case she's still alive. Kennedy refuses.
Instead, Kennedy begins working on an alibi, insisting he's going to tell authorities that Mary Jo was driving the car.
The other two men continue to insist the accident must be reported. Kennedy then yells out he'll report it himself, they are not to.
Kennedy then jumps into the water and swims the 300 foot channel back to Edgartown where his hotel room is.
That's 1 way to end a conversation that's going badly, I guess.
Dripping wet, Kennedy arrives back at this hotel room, changes his clothes, stands outside where he will be seen.
Kennedy makes it a point at 2:30 am to ask a passing hotel employee what time it is. He's establishing his alibi.
His story was now going to be that he wasn't in the accident at all, Mary Jo dropped him off at his hotel & left in the car on her own.
As if that wasn't enough of an alibi, Kennedy makes it a point to find the hotel owner at 2:55 am & complain a 'noisy party' woke him up.
Kennedy then goes to breakfast with friends.
At 8:00 am Gargan & Markham arrive at the hotel to discover Kennedy chatting with friends, just having finished breakfast. Gargan is furious.
He pulls Kennedy aside and lets him have it verbally. He knows Kennedy didn't report the accident like he claimed he would.
Kennedy responds by saying he was sure Mary Jo was still alive. He 'felt' this as he swam across the channel.
Again, Markham & Gargan gang up on Kennedy, insisting the accident must be reported. NOW. Kennedy finally agrees, or appears to.
They take the ferry back to Chappaquiddick & Kennedy gets inside a phone booth, ostensibly to report the accident at last.
But instead Kennedy, in the privacy of the phone booth, is calling friends and asking for advice. He still hasn't reported it.
Meanwhile, earlier that morning, as Kennedy was eating breakfast with his friends at the hotel, 2 fishermen spotted the car in the pond.
The two fishermen immediately report the accident, something Kennedy could have done hours ago.
At 8:45 am, professional diver John Farrar, who had been summoned, discovers Mary Jo's body in the car (later in sworn testimony stating that Mary Jo lived for at least two hours after the crash, eventually dying from suffocation).
Kennedy is still on the phone at the ferry landing furiously calling friends for advice when he's told the body has been found.
Senator Ted Kennedy then leaves the ferry landing & heads for the Edgartown police station to turn himself in.
He has Markham prepare a statement for him which he gives to the police. In it, he claims to have been dazed all night & not remember much.
In that statement to police, Kennedy tells several huge lies. He claims he was in shock, walked back to the party, was taken to the hotel.
He then fell asleep and did not remember anything until he woke up in the morning and heard about the accident.
He made no mention of agreeing to report the accident, swimming the channel, trying to establish an alibi, etc.
Kennedy is then released on his own recognizance. He gets on the ferry, crossing paths with the Medical Examiner coming to see Mary Jo.
7 days later, Kennedy is charged only with leaving the scene of an accident. He's given a 2 month suspended sentence.
At the press conference he did following the accident, Kennedy showed up in a neck brace, pretending to be injured.
so there you have it. the very best of progressive problem solving.