Studies show having children sucks, having more children even more so

[purbeast0]

they need to make no children restaruants.

worst thing is trying to have a nice dinner and getting stuck next to some booth full of toddler short bus rejects. yes please reach over into the other booths and drool and stare at me.

if you go to nice restaurants there will not be children there.

 

[Sentrosi2121]

I hate studies like this.
Raising a family is a unique experience to everyone. Each family is unique. And each family has their own particular way of raising their kids. It is a challenge, but I would not want to live my entire life without a family.

 

[highland145]

I say you have them so they can work. Work their little asses off.

 

[SP33Demon]

Nieces, nephews, and cousins can fill that void for us, and the beauty is that we don't have to take them home with us when the event is over. 🙂

I can see taking joy in others, especially relatives you got gifts for and their reaction to opening said gifts. Now take that glowy feeling and magnify it by about 1000 if they're your own kids. Seriously, nothing can compare - not secks, yachts + fishing, playing your fav video game, a successful project at work that nets you a 36% raise, camping, pets, drinks with best friends on vacations, etc. It's a feeling I can't describe when I see that much joy in something I have created - almost kinda religious and I hardly go to church.

 

[IndyColtsFan]

I can see taking joy in others, especially relatives you got gifts for and their reaction to opening said gifts. Now take that glowy feeling and magnify it by about 1000 if they're your own kids. Seriously, nothing can compare - not secks, yachts + fishing, playing your fav video game, a successful project at work that nets you a 36% raise, camping, pets, drinks with best friends on vacations, etc. It's a feeling I can't describe when I see that much joy in something I have created - almost kinda religious and I hardly go to church.

I'll take my chances. 🙂

In the interest of full disclosure, my parents adopted a baby when I was already out of the house and I had the opportunity to spend tons of time with him, spoil him, and teach him things. I love the kid (he is now 21) and wouldn't trade those years for the world, but I am smart enough to realize that I got all the benefits (seeing him, playing with him, spoiling him, etc) without the pain (diaper changes, paying for all his living expenses, having complete responsibility for him).

 

[MJinZ]

I can see taking joy in others, especially relatives you got gifts for and their reaction to opening said gifts. Now take that glowy feeling and magnify it by about 1000 if they're your own kids. Seriously, nothing can compare - not secks, yachts + fishing, playing your fav video game, a successful project at work that nets you a 36% raise, camping, pets, drinks with best friends on vacations, etc. It's a feeling I can't describe when I see that much joy in something I have created - almost kinda religious and I hardly go to church.

Yea... and Nieces, nephews and cousins aren't going to be giving you grandbabies or giving a crap about you when you're 80 either.

 

[MJinZ]

I say you have them so they can work. Work their little asses off.

Looks like playing his ass off to me.

 

[highland145]

Looks like playing his ass off to me.

No. He's using improper shoveling technique for it to be playing. Gotta teach him the whole fulcrum/lever concept.

 

[ichy]

Yea... and Nieces, nephews and cousins aren't going to be giving you grandbabies or giving a crap about you when you're 80 either.

Unfortunately there are lots of kids who don't give a crap about their parents either, otherwise there wouldn't be a nursing home industry.

 

[highland145]

Unfortunately there are lots of kids who don't give a crap about their parents either, otherwise there wouldn't be a nursing home industry.

I've heard that your kids will treat you like you treated your parents. Maybe something to it. Maybe a ton of other factors.

 

[SunnyD]

Man. I guess I'm fucked. (4 kids, 1 on the way)

 

[MJinZ]

I have very, very deep reservations about having kids so I ought to agree with this article, but I had to roll my eyes at it. Fields like sociology and "behavioral economics" are NOT sciences, and to pretend that any studies they produce are actually meaningful is kind of silly.

Also, I think that people who don't have kids because they want to buy more toys are fools. Stuff is nice to have, but it doesn't make you happy on its own. Having kids means you'll be denied a huge number of experiences though (I love to travel, see the world, have adventures) and IMO losing those opportunities is the biggest drawback to reproducing.

Uh, those fake sciences are the driving force behind multi-billion dollar advertising and marketing industries. One can argue that they are probably the MOST meaningful because ultimately, life is about social interaction, not about rocket science (until the aliens come to take over anyway).

I also don't understand what about having kids would preclude you from doing anything like traveling or fun stuff. I mean, if a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?

 

[MJinZ]

Man. I guess I'm fucked. (4 kids, 1 on the way)

Actually, you probably are. Well, you're going to have a lot of help from the rest of us who are paying more taxes so you can get by raising 5 kids on your income.

 

[KDOG]

In the transition between agrarian and post agrarian societies, children go from financial assets (little kids do chores past a certain age) to financial burdens (children just eat, demand toys and entertainment). Financial burdens negatively affect marriages.

This is why most first world countries shrink demographically and third world countries continue to grow.

EXACTLY. Children went from CONTRIBUTING to the overall success of a family - financial and otherwise - to being NOTHING but a drain, they just basically sit there and consume, they are nothing but cost.

 

[OILFIELDTRASH]

Not having kid(s) means you'll be denied a huge number of experiences also.

Ha! This is where I was about a month ago.

Rode my ninja to work today. I'm free!!!!!!!

 

[Modelworks]

I'm not referring to toys or manisons.

Just a simple 1500sq.ft. house, one car to be shared, and enough left to pay the bills and save a bit. It takes two people working just to live a modest comfortable life these days.

You don't have to work yourself to death to live a good life.
Make a list of everything that is required, I mean absolutely necessary.
Most people find that when doing that they have a lot of stuff that is a want not a need.

 

[Modelworks]

I disagree. It sucks to be hungry growing up and there is no food in the house. My wife and I both work, and plan to continue doing so. I want my kids to have a better childhood than we did.

Who would be going hungry ? I grew up VERY poor. I remember being yelled at by my mom because she gave me $5 to get bread and I bought a piece of candy too . That is how tight money was sometimes. But we NEVER went hungry, we always had decent clothes, were warm and were loved. We didn't have the latest toys so we made our own, was better really.

 

[IndyColtsFan]

I also don't understand what about having kids would preclude you from doing anything like traveling or fun stuff. I mean, if a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?

Do you have kids of your own?

 

[Modelworks]

Read the 3rd page of the article. ALL parents are spending more time with their kids then they did a few generations ago.

You are right about parents blaming each other. Having children is stressful work and stress brings arguments.

Absolutely untrue. Ask parents when was the last time that everyone sat at the same table and ate a meal ? And not one where someone hurried through the meal to go do something else.

Some parents don't even know where their kids are without calling around to find them. Others don't know what classes or grades their kid has until the report card comes home for them to sign. How many kids stay home alone on saturday and sunday because the parents are always at work or come home everyday after school to an empty house ?

My mother taught me how to cook, can food. My dad took me fishing every week and made it a priority to spend time with me vs work. When they wanted him to take a higher position and it would require him to leave early and get home late he refused it because he didn't want to be away from us that much.

Too many parents think they are doing the right thing by working long hours so their kid can have a better life than they did. But if you never spend time with them and think that money will fill the gap you will both be missing out on something that money cannot replace.

 

[SunnyD]

Actually, you probably are. Well, you're going to have a lot of help from the rest of us who are paying more taxes so you can get by raising 5 kids on your income.

Do you even know what my income is? Nope, you don't - so shut the hell up. I'll keep this in mind as I'm paying your social security, medical and unemployment taxes - k?

 

[IndyColtsFan]

Absolutely untrue. Ask parents when was the last time that everyone sat at the same table and ate a meal ? And not one where someone hurried through the meal to go do something else.

Some parents don't even know where their kids are without calling around to find them. Others don't know what classes or grades their kid has until the report card comes home for them to sign. How many kids stay home alone on saturday and sunday because the parents are always at work or come home everyday after school to an empty house ?

I agree with you. Let's take my wife's brother and sister-in-law, who have 2 kids. They sure don't seem to give up their hobbies, that's for sure -- but of course, they are CONSTANTLY dumping their kids off on my wife's parents because "they need alone time" or time to pursue those hobbies. I guess it pays to have a free babysitting service that you can call on a moment's notice! These guys are constantly giving up their kids on the weekends and on a whim, so for them, NOTHING precludes their hobbies. So if you have arrangements like that, you're golden! The funny part is that the mom will get on Facebook and always make these ridiculous comments like "Sometimes Moms don't get to do fun things." It takes considerable restraint for me to avoid commenting with "You're right, but it isn't like you'd know what that was about."

 

[Wyndru]

I don't understand people who have kids to just throw them in daycare all day. Do your child a favor and figure out a way for one of you to stay home.

I wish it was possible, but unfortunately it is not. We don't live outside of our means, but I have been laid off 2 times in the past 3 years, and now have a salary much less than I had when we bought our house. We didn't want to wait any longer to have kids, since we were afraid we wouldn't be able to have them later. We are still able to afford everything, but dual income is necessary at this time. My wife has her doctorate now, so once she is licensed later this year and (if) she gets a higher paying job, I may be able to stay home with the baby. We don't have any family capable of watching her either.

The daycare we are bringing them to seems very interactive though, we have visited it a few times already, and each time we peek in, they are sitting on the floor playing with the kids. Also, when they get to toddler and above, it allows them to be social with other kids, which hopefully will make the transition to preschool and kindergarten better.

Believe me though, the first day I bring our daughter to daycare I'm going to be kicking myself for not making more money (and regretting choosing the technical support field to work in). :'(

 

[Modelworks]

Yes.

Mortgage: $1291
Student Loans: $679
Phone, cell, cable, internet, electric, propane: $529
Car: $534
Auto, life, disability insurance: $198
Groceries: $400
Gas: $240
Day care: $866

Get rid of the home phone if you use cell phones.
On the cell phones only get talk features, dump all the other stuff
Switch out cable for OTA tv it is free
You can get used cars with a warranty for less than $300
Look for someone that might be willing to do child care from their home and you should be able to cut that in half or more. I tend to look for older people like grandmothers that are looking to do childcare and are not caring for but 1 or 2 kids. I avoid people trying to run a daycare out of a house with 8+ kids etc. Care is often better than any daycare and the child makes a new friend.


Doing just the above saves you over $600 .

 

[ichy]

I also don't understand what about having kids would preclude you from doing anything like traveling or fun stuff. I mean, if a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?

Taking a trip becomes vastly more expensive and complicated when kids are involved.

 

[child of wonder]

LMAO @ all the people that think they can run Jumpem's life better than he can.