Should wives be submissive to their husbands?

[Dumac]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Dumac

Originally posted by: moshquerade
what he is saying is you shouldn't think of someone as beneath you, and he's right. (unless they commit criminal acts or something like that). he makes a good point that the OP isn't regarding.

I'm saying that will never happen. I'm also saying that a colorblind society will never exist.

Also, no where did he state that he believes women are beneath men.

I never said it would happen totally. there is no way the masses would embrace that even though it's a correct behavior. i did say that believing someone should submit to you is wrong, and that is what the OP has said. So yes, he is saying that women should submit to or aka be beneath men. (double entendre, i know 😛

He said that a wife should submit to her husband's wishes when her husband thinks she is out of line. He also said that the husband shoudl submit to his wife's wishes if he is out of line. How can two people both be beneath each other?

Submitting to someone's wishes =! being beneath them.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: Dumac

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Dumac

Originally posted by: moshquerade
what he is saying is you shouldn't think of someone as beneath you, and he's right. (unless they commit criminal acts or something like that). he makes a good point that the OP isn't regarding.

I'm saying that will never happen. I'm also saying that a colorblind society will never exist.

Also, no where did he state that he believes women are beneath men.

I never said it would happen totally. there is no way the masses would embrace that even though it's a correct behavior. i did say that believing someone should submit to you is wrong, and that is what the OP has said. So yes, he is saying that women should submit to or aka be beneath men. (double entendre, i know 😛

He said that a wife should submit to her husband's wishes when her husband thinks she is out of line. He also said that the husband shoudl submit to his wife's wishes if he is out of line. How can two people both be beneath each other?

Submitting to someone's wishes =! being beneath them.

he was on the verge of suggesting domestic abuse. go back and read the original post.
that is dominating someone, and that is putting them beneath you.

 

[n yusef]

Originally posted by: Rebasxer
I think submissiveness really depends on the woman. Some women like to be housewives, feminists will disagree with this but I know plenty of girls around my age (in college) that don't want careers and just want to get married, stay home and raise a family. I know other women that walk all over their boyfriends and are not submissive in any manor. It really depends on the woman

Also, when did any sort of physical contact on a man's part become taboo. There's a difference between slapping her around a little bit and being physical in a fight. It seems like if a couple is fighting, the only proper course is for the man to handcuff himself because any sort of touching constitutes abuse. I've never been a relationship where a girl hasn't hit me when shes mad, but a guys not allowed to restrain her from getting hit. Men in this country are so warped

Maybe you wouldn't attract violent women if you weren't violent yourself.

You have it backwards. The warped men are the ones who think it's OK to hit women, if it's only "lapping [them] around a little bit".

 

[nerp]

Originally posted by: buck
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Your dad is a racoon.

 

[Dumac]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Dumac

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Dumac

Originally posted by: moshquerade
what he is saying is you shouldn't think of someone as beneath you, and he's right. (unless they commit criminal acts or something like that). he makes a good point that the OP isn't regarding.

I'm saying that will never happen. I'm also saying that a colorblind society will never exist.

Also, no where did he state that he believes women are beneath men.

I never said it would happen totally. there is no way the masses would embrace that even though it's a correct behavior. i did say that believing someone should submit to you is wrong, and that is what the OP has said. So yes, he is saying that women should submit to or aka be beneath men. (double entendre, i know 😛

He said that a wife should submit to her husband's wishes when her husband thinks she is out of line. He also said that the husband shoudl submit to his wife's wishes if he is out of line. How can two people both be beneath each other?

Submitting to someone's wishes =! being beneath them.

he was on the verge of suggesting domestic abuse. go back and read the original post.
that is dominating someone, and that is putting them beneath you.

Grabbing someone's arm =! domestic abuse.

People today are too sensitive about matters of the family household, one side ready to hang the man of the house at the blow of a whistle and the other side stuck on ideas of family conformity.

EDIT: Actually both sides are pretty much glued to the idea that their family setup is the right one, not realizing the variables of class, race, culture, and education.

 

[FeuerFrei]

Yes. Men were designed to fill the leadership role.

It's easy to submit to someone who loves you.

Let's face it, if no one had the final say, deadlock would be problematic.

 

[lxskllr]

Originally posted by: Dumac


EDIT: Actually both sides are pretty much glued to the idea that their family setup is the right one, not realizing the variables of class, race, culture, and education.

That's a fairly important point. Many Latinas expect to be controlled, and will not respect a man that doesn't exert control over her. Relationships can be a complex dynamic, and in my example above, the male may not have as much actual control as outward appearances indicate.

 

[SagaLore]

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK
I think that wives should generally be submissive to their husbands. I DON't think husbands should abuse this though and I don't mean like a dictator "Go do the dishes. Do the laundry. etc." but more out of respect, like if the wife is mad and yelling at someone and the husband grabs her arm and says "stop it!", she should.

/flamesuit on

Discuss.

You just described disrespect, abuse, and general assholery.

Human beings are equals, regardless of their gender or position in life.

 

[SagaLore]

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: spidey07
For the most part yes. The man leads, the woman follows. But it's done out of mutual respect.

That's what I think. The woman shouldn't be submissive out of fear, but out of respect.

What kind of respect does a guy like that deserve? I'm a guy, and I think he deserves none.

 

[SagaLore]

Originally posted by: SonnyDaze
Where do kids come up with this shit?

Church and Video Games.

 

[Rebasxer]

Originally posted by: n yusef

Originally posted by: Rebasxer
I think submissiveness really depends on the woman. Some women like to be housewives, feminists will disagree with this but I know plenty of girls around my age (in college) that don't want careers and just want to get married, stay home and raise a family. I know other women that walk all over their boyfriends and are not submissive in any manor. It really depends on the woman

Also, when did any sort of physical contact on a man's part become taboo. There's a difference between slapping her around a little bit and being physical in a fight. It seems like if a couple is fighting, the only proper course is for the man to handcuff himself because any sort of touching constitutes abuse. I've never been a relationship where a girl hasn't hit me when shes mad, but a guys not allowed to restrain her from getting hit. Men in this country are so warped

Maybe you wouldn't attract violent women if you weren't violent yourself.

You have it backwards. The warped men are the ones who think it's OK to hit women, if it's only "lapping [them] around a little bit".

I was trying to say that men that justify hitting women by saying that it was only "slapping her around a little bit" is unacceptable, but there's a difference between grabbing a woman's arm and slapping her or hitting her.

 

[TechBoyJK]

Originally posted by: SagaLore

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: spidey07
For the most part yes. The man leads, the woman follows. But it's done out of mutual respect.

That's what I think. The woman shouldn't be submissive out of fear, but out of respect.

What kind of respect does a guy like that deserve? I'm a guy, and I think he deserves none.

I don't understand. I'm ignorant. I'm not suggesting that the woman needs to constantly behave submissively. I was with a girl for a while, and I LOVED her wittyness and the way she would talk back to me, debate, and argue. But there was a point where I could 'maintain my stance' and she would submit, at least for that particular situation.

 

[AstroManLuca]

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: SagaLore

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: spidey07
For the most part yes. The man leads, the woman follows. But it's done out of mutual respect.

That's what I think. The woman shouldn't be submissive out of fear, but out of respect.

What kind of respect does a guy like that deserve? I'm a guy, and I think he deserves none.

I don't understand. I'm ignorant. I'm not suggesting that the woman needs to constantly behave submissively. I was with a girl for a while, and I LOVED her wittyness and the way she would talk back to me, debate, and argue. But there was a point where I could 'maintain my stance' and she would submit, at least for that particular situation.

Yes, you are ignorant.

Basically what you're saying is that when push comes to shove and things get "serious," you expect your girlfriend/wife to always submit to what you want. You're okay with her expressing herself and having some degree of independence, but you think of yourself as infallible when it really matters.

It's easy to be kind and friendly with someone when there's nothing too important involved. The difficult part is when things are important. Some, hopefully most, people believe that the really important decisions should be made jointly between the man and the woman. You apparently think that all the really important decisions should be made by the man, because I guess according to you, men are always right and women aren't capable of making decisions or having worthwhile opinions.

 

[Nik]

Relationships require compromise. Give and take. Not Command and Dictate.

 

[spidey07]

Originally posted by: AstroManLuca

Yes, you are ignorant.

Basically what you're saying is that when push comes to shove and things get "serious," you expect your girlfriend/wife to always submit to what you want. You're okay with her expressing herself and having some degree of independence, but you think of yourself as infallible when it really matters.

It's easy to be kind and friendly with someone when there's nothing too important involved. The difficult part is when things are important. Some, hopefully most, people believe that the really important decisions should be made jointly between the man and the woman. You apparently think that all the really important decisions should be made by the man, because I guess according to you, men are always right and women aren't capable of making decisions or having worthwhile opinions.

Or maybe, just maybe, most women want the decisions made for them and respect their man much more so because he does.

 

[Kirby]

Originally posted by: Nik
Relationships require compromise. Give and take.

Give her a fat lip and take her sandwich? 😛

 

[Svnla]

First of all, is this should be in L&R?

Secondly, IMO, a long term healthy relationship should be 50-50 and base on mutual respect/courtesy/love/etc....and "not you should be/do..this and that".

 

[TechBoyJK]

Originally posted by: AstroManLuca

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: SagaLore

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: spidey07
For the most part yes. The man leads, the woman follows. But it's done out of mutual respect.

That's what I think. The woman shouldn't be submissive out of fear, but out of respect.

What kind of respect does a guy like that deserve? I'm a guy, and I think he deserves none.

I don't understand. I'm ignorant. I'm not suggesting that the woman needs to constantly behave submissively. I was with a girl for a while, and I LOVED her wittyness and the way she would talk back to me, debate, and argue. But there was a point where I could 'maintain my stance' and she would submit, at least for that particular situation.

Yes, you are ignorant.

Basically what you're saying is that when push comes to shove and things get "serious," you expect your girlfriend/wife to always submit to what you want. You're okay with her expressing herself and having some degree of independence, but you think of yourself as infallible when it really matters.

It's easy to be kind and friendly with someone when there's nothing too important involved. The difficult part is when things are important. Some, hopefully most, people believe that the really important decisions should be made jointly between the man and the woman. You apparently think that all the really important decisions should be made by the man, because I guess according to you, men are always right and women aren't capable of making decisions or having worthwhile opinions.

I didn't say that. What I'm saying is that during the decision making process between the two, if I know I'm right, I will stick to my guns. I'll be assertive and take the lead. It was up to her to submit. I wouldn't beat her into submission. Now, if I ended up being wrong, but we did things my way, an "I told you so" would be expected, and I would respect her enough to learn from my mistake. HOWEVER, I'm not saying that I should "always be right". I wouldn't want to be with a girl who didn't think. I would want her to stand up and say " I think we should do things this way" and I would want to respect her enough to listen.

 

[TechBoyJK]

Originally posted by: Svnla
First of all, is this should be in L&R?

Secondly, IMO, a long term healthy relationship should be 50-50 and base on mutual respect/courtesy/love/etc....and "not you should be/do..this and that".

As I stated in my OP, I said this isn't about dictating. I wouldn't want a woman who would let me constantly treat her like a housemade. I'd want that 50/50 balance. I'm just asking when it gets to a certain point where the partner is acting stupid and the need to intervene is there, do you step up and intervene? Should the partner submit, or act disrespectful?

 

[AstroManLuca]

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: AstroManLuca

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: SagaLore

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: spidey07
For the most part yes. The man leads, the woman follows. But it's done out of mutual respect.

That's what I think. The woman shouldn't be submissive out of fear, but out of respect.

What kind of respect does a guy like that deserve? I'm a guy, and I think he deserves none.

I don't understand. I'm ignorant. I'm not suggesting that the woman needs to constantly behave submissively. I was with a girl for a while, and I LOVED her wittyness and the way she would talk back to me, debate, and argue. But there was a point where I could 'maintain my stance' and she would submit, at least for that particular situation.

Yes, you are ignorant.

Basically what you're saying is that when push comes to shove and things get "serious," you expect your girlfriend/wife to always submit to what you want. You're okay with her expressing herself and having some degree of independence, but you think of yourself as infallible when it really matters.

It's easy to be kind and friendly with someone when there's nothing too important involved. The difficult part is when things are important. Some, hopefully most, people believe that the really important decisions should be made jointly between the man and the woman. You apparently think that all the really important decisions should be made by the man, because I guess according to you, men are always right and women aren't capable of making decisions or having worthwhile opinions.

I didn't say that. What I'm saying is that during the decision making process between the two, if I know I'm right, I will stick to my guns. I'll be assertive and take the lead. It was up to her to submit. I wouldn't beat her into submission. Now, if I ended up being wrong, but we did things my way, an "I told you so" would be expected, and I would respect her enough to learn from my mistake. HOWEVER, I'm not saying that I should "always be right". I wouldn't want to be with a girl who didn't think. I would want her to stand up and say " I think we should do things this way" and I would want to respect her enough to listen.

What would happen if she were to also stick to her guns? Would your head explode at the thought of a woman standing up for herself?

 

[TechBoyJK]

Originally posted by: AstroManLuca

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: AstroManLuca

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: SagaLore

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: spidey07
For the most part yes. The man leads, the woman follows. But it's done out of mutual respect.

That's what I think. The woman shouldn't be submissive out of fear, but out of respect.

What kind of respect does a guy like that deserve? I'm a guy, and I think he deserves none.

I don't understand. I'm ignorant. I'm not suggesting that the woman needs to constantly behave submissively. I was with a girl for a while, and I LOVED her wittyness and the way she would talk back to me, debate, and argue. But there was a point where I could 'maintain my stance' and she would submit, at least for that particular situation.

Yes, you are ignorant.

Basically what you're saying is that when push comes to shove and things get "serious," you expect your girlfriend/wife to always submit to what you want. You're okay with her expressing herself and having some degree of independence, but you think of yourself as infallible when it really matters.

It's easy to be kind and friendly with someone when there's nothing too important involved. The difficult part is when things are important. Some, hopefully most, people believe that the really important decisions should be made jointly between the man and the woman. You apparently think that all the really important decisions should be made by the man, because I guess according to you, men are always right and women aren't capable of making decisions or having worthwhile opinions.

I didn't say that. What I'm saying is that during the decision making process between the two, if I know I'm right, I will stick to my guns. I'll be assertive and take the lead. It was up to her to submit. I wouldn't beat her into submission. Now, if I ended up being wrong, but we did things my way, an "I told you so" would be expected, and I would respect her enough to learn from my mistake. HOWEVER, I'm not saying that I should "always be right". I wouldn't want to be with a girl who didn't think. I would want her to stand up and say " I think we should do things this way" and I would want to respect her enough to listen.

What would happen if she were to also stick to her guns? Would your head explode at the thought of a woman standing up for herself?

I'd probably sleep on the couch.

 

[AstroManLuca]

(quote chain removed)

I guess you're also bringing up the idea of someone acting irrationally. Of course, when someone's like that, they don't realize it. I'd hope that the irrational party would be able to own up to it at some point, maybe after the fact, but I'd want them to admit that they were being irrational.

A lot of men talk about how irrational and illogical women can be, and I agree, but on the other hand, a lot of men can be pretty irrationally egotistical as well, so I think it pretty much balances out. It's hard for anyone to have an unbiased viewpoint on the matter, but women ought to admit to being unreasonable just as readily as a man. The real test is how you feel long after the argument is over - if one party steps in and tells the other that they are being totally unreasonable, does the unreasonable person still feel like they were right all along, long after? Or do they realize they were being unreasonable and admit to it?

If you're constantly slighting your partner or being slighted by them, but you are unable to ever identify what you did wrong even after the fact, then there's a major problem.

 

[Svnla]

Originally posted by: TechBoyJK

Originally posted by: Svnla
First of all, is this should be in L&R?

Secondly, IMO, a long term healthy relationship should be 50-50 and base on mutual respect/courtesy/love/etc....and "not you should be/do..this and that".

As I stated in my OP, I said this isn't about dictating. I wouldn't want a woman who would let me constantly treat her like a housemade. I'd want that 50/50 balance. I'm just asking when it gets to a certain point where the partner is acting stupid and the need to intervene is there, do you step up and intervene? Should the partner submit, or act disrespectful?

I see where you are coming from. Then you need to rephrase the OP. It should not be "submissive" but rather "listen to" or "open to suggestion(s)".

If my gf or future wife is acting up for whatever reason, of course I would want to know the reason(s).

 

[zinfamous]

OH boy! YATJrMBT

Yet another Techboy Jr. misogyny/bigotry thread.

 

[Geekbabe]

Originally posted by: jjsole
I can not imagine my wife ever yelling at someone and them not deserving it.

Word!!!

I'm a gracious person, I tip well and am polite, if I'm getting loud with somebody something is really wrong, my husband would have my back in such a situation
and would ask his questions later, he wouldn't humilate me by treating me like I was his dog by grabbing me and yelling "stop it"