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Post the WORST joke you know

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Originally posted by: KLin
what do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water?

bob

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall?

Art

What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs on the beach?

Sandy

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?

Russell

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who can play all the instruments?


Stump the Band
 
A priest, lawyer, and engineer are heading for the guillotine in revolutionary France. They are offered the choice of going face up or face down. The priest asks to go face up, so that the heavens are the last thing he sees. The blade is dropped and miraculously stops an inch from his neck. Amazed, the executioner lets him go, as it is obviously a sign from above. The lawyer, seeing this take place, decides that he too will go face up. The same thing happens to him, the blade stops an inch from his neck. He too is let go. The engineer figures if it's good enough for them, it's good enough for him. He lays down, face up, and the blade is raised. When it reaches the top, he calls out:

"I see your problem"
 
An American, Englishman, and Polock are captured by a tribe of cannibals in a remote jungle. The chief pulls aside the American and explains to him that he will be tortured for as long as he can remain alive, but when he finally dies, his bones will be fashioned into tools, his skull will be used for ritual ornaments, his meat will be eaten, and his skin used for a canoe. He is granted one last request. The American thinks for a moment and asks for a knife. Then he slits his throat to avoid the torture that will ensue.

The chief goes to the Englishman and tells him the same thing. He will be tortured for as long as he can remain alive, but when he finally dies, his bones will be fashioned into tools, his skull will be used for ritual ornaments, his meat will be eaten, and his skin used for a canoe. He is granted one last request. He asks for a sword, and stabs himself in the gut, to avoid the torture too.

The cheif then goes to the Polock and gives him the same speech. He will be tortured for as long as he can remain alive, but when he finally dies, his bones will be fashioned into tools, his skull will be used for ritual ornaments, his meat will be eaten, and his skin used for a canoe. He is granted one last request. He thinks about it for a moment, and asks for a fork. He is given the fork and begins stabbing himself in the stomach and says: "This is for your canoe!!"
 
Originally posted by: Triumph
Ok so here is the joke you never heard..........


Once upon a time, there were 2 twin Brother babies, am mom and a Dad. The babies were small and used to suckup milk everyday. One day, Baby # 2 realized that his twin Bro or Baby # 1 sucks more milk than required and thus Baby # 2 would only get some drops to suck!!.

So after tired of his bro (Baby #1), he thought of a plan, he used poison on the nipples so that his twin bro may not be ableto suck for life or die.

Confident of what Baby # 2 had done, he went to sleep thinking the next day would bring some Parabolic Glory.

NEXT MORNING:

Baby # 2 woke up cheerfully hoping to get some milk, opened the door and found the funnerel of his father.

haahhahaha, Baby # 1 lives.............

____________________________________________________________________________________
Haha - As Triumph responded to the original posting of this 'joke' - - -

Posts: 5699
Joined: 10/09/1999
that was the worst delivery of a mediocre joke I've ever heard.

-------------------------
-Triumph
 
What's black & white, has three eyes and sings?













Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr. onstage!!
(Obviously an ancient joke)



What does a fish say when it hits a wall??











DAM !!


-Scott
 
since ducknuts is gone, I would have to say:


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