Post the WORST joke you know

[Kev]

Originally posted by: CRXican
what's the difference between a dead baby and a rock?

*most horrible punchline ever*

 

[Kev]

how many babies does it take to paint a fence?



depends on how hard you throw them

 

[XZeroII]

What did Captain Picard find in his toilet?

Captain's Log.

 

[Chu]

Q: How do you make a 9 year old girl cry twice?
A : Wipe your bloody dick off on her teddy bear.

 

[JoeKing]

Originally posted by: XZeroII
What did Captain Picard find in his toilet?

Captain's Log.

Which reminds me...

What do the star ship Enterprise and toliet paper have in common?

They both go around Uranus and pickup Klingons!

 

[ajpa123]

What do you call it when you have 2 green balls in your right hand ?
..
...
.....
........
............
............... Kermit the Frog's undivided attention !
LOL

 

[Teliasen]

All the ones I know have been used

 

[Fritzo]

Originally posted by: Chu
Q: How do you make a 9 year old girl cry twice?
A : Wipe your bloody dick off on her teddy bear.

Wow....that's not bad. That's just gross. I'm suprised you don't have the "banned' PM in your mailbox yet :|

 

[thuper]

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing, you already told her twice.

OR:

Your nose is next.

 

[nmcglennon]

Who farted?

 

[Tyson82]

hehe
the bear and the bunny pooing in the woods was frickin funny

my two:

Celine Dion walks into a bar, bartender says 'why the long face'?


A magician is up on stage in front of a large audience. He says, 'Some magicians would call one person up on stage and hypnotize him. But since I am the best, Im going to hypnotize the entire audience."

He pulls out his old pocketwatch and starts swinging back and forth and chanting 'Watch the watch. Watch the watch." Suddenly the chain breaks on his watch and it falls to the floor, shattering into a thousand pieces.

The magician says "ah crap."









And it took two weeks to clean up the theater.

 

[Cyberian]

Originally posted by: Ninjja
Joe: What do you call a deer with no eyes?

Mary: No idea.

What do you call a dead deer with no eyes?

Still no idea.



What do you call a dead, castrated deer with no eyes?

Still no fvcking idea.

 

[LeGaCi]

How do you get a hindu to self-destruct?

Push the red button.

 

[user1234]

What did Cypher tell Trinity ?
Don't hate me, I'm just the messenger

 

[islandtechengineers]

worst joke other than chicken and the road would've been me constantly calling my firend richard / DICK everytime i saw him (at work of course).
he liked being called dick.
so...

HEY DICK,
HOW YA BEEN DICK
how tall are you today dick?

you get the point.

 

[user1234]

Why did Adam and Eve banished from the garden of Eden ?
Because they broke the most important rule

What is the most important rule in the garden of Eden ?
No clothes allowed

 

[Chu]

Originally posted by: Fritzo

Originally posted by: Chu
Q: How do you make a 9 year old girl cry twice?
A : Wipe your bloody dick off on her teddy bear.

Wow....that's not bad. That's just gross. I'm suprised you don't have the "banned' PM in your mailbox yet :|

You'd be surprised how many laughs that gets at a bar

 

[jdiddy]

knock knock
whos there
little boy blew
little boy blew who
michael jackson

 

[user1234]

I nominate my joke as the worst biblical joke ever

 

[onza]

Originally posted by: user1234
I nominate my joke as the worst biblical joke ever

you cant nominate your own joke.

 

[ndee]

Originally posted by: Chu

Originally posted by: Fritzo

Originally posted by: Chu
Q: How do you make a 9 year old girl cry twice?
A : Wipe your bloody dick off on her teddy bear.

Wow....that's not bad. That's just gross. I'm suprised you don't have the "banned' PM in your mailbox yet :|

You'd be surprised how many laughs that gets at a bar

yeah, at your children-molester bar maybe. Sick fvck.

 

[Fritzo]

A magician is up on stage in front of a large audience. He says, 'Some magicians would call one person up on stage and hypnotize him. But since I am the best, Im going to hypnotize the entire audience."

He pulls out his old pocketwatch and starts swinging back and forth and chanting 'Watch the watch. Watch the watch." Suddenly the chain breaks on his watch and it falls to the floor, shattering into a thousand pieces.

The magician says "ah crap."



And it took two weeks to clean up the theater.

I don't get it...

 

[Legendary]

Originally posted by: Fritzo

A magician is up on stage in front of a large audience. He says, 'Some magicians would call one person up on stage and hypnotize him. But since I am the best, Im going to hypnotize the entire audience."

He pulls out his old pocketwatch and starts swinging back and forth and chanting 'Watch the watch. Watch the watch." Suddenly the chain breaks on his watch and it falls to the floor, shattering into a thousand pieces.

The magician says "ah crap."



And it took two weeks to clean up the theater.

I don't get it...

Magician says "ah crap" in dismay about his watch.
Hypnotized audience craps all over theater due to his command (crap)
Theater takes 2 weeks to clean.

 

[tinyabs]

Knife cuts meat as we all know. But meat cuts what?






Your poop.

 

[Chu]

Originally posted by: ndee

Originally posted by: Chu

Originally posted by: Fritzo

Originally posted by: Chu
Q: How do you make a 9 year old girl cry twice?
A : Wipe your bloody dick off on her teddy bear.

Wow....that's not bad. That's just gross. I'm suprised you don't have the "banned' PM in your mailbox yet :|

You'd be surprised how many laughs that gets at a bar

yeah, at your children-molester bar maybe. Sick fvck.

So do these replies mean I won