*Must read advice for ordering pizza.

[Parasitic]

Why would u eat pizza for breakfast?
Why? Oh the humanity why!

Now lunch or dinner is a good idea.
Perhaps I'm a sick person

 

[Reckoner]

Originally posted by: Parasitic
Why would u eat pizza for breakfast?
Why? Oh the humanity why!

Now lunch or dinner is a good idea.
Perhaps I'm a sick person

You're Parasitic, of course you're a sick person!

 

[Parasitic]

Nevertheless I prefer a light breakfast - why stress yourself first thing in the morning?

 

[shortylickens]

Originally posted by: BlancoNino

Originally posted by: shortylickens
"1. Never pay full menu price, unless you are ordering a lot of pizza"
WTF?

I do agree with the rest of the tips though.

If you order a lot of pizza, you will get a good deal on it. They will give every other pizza half off. Also, I doubt you're going to find 10 jumbo pizzas worth of coupons or specials.

Once again, we have a communications breakdown.

"Never pay full price, UNLESS ordering a lot of pizza."

 

[Whoozyerdaddy]

Originally posted by: BlancoNino
1. Decide what you want to order BEFORE you call them. At least get a general idea of what everyone likes, if you're not entirely sure how much you want to spend or what the specials are.

2. Never pay full menu price, unless you are ordering a lot of pizza. Most places will offer discounts (close to half off) for each additional pizza you order of the same size. There are always coupons and specials...use them. If you don't have any, print some off the internet, or even make a reasonable one up (90% of the time they don't ask for it, and if they do, say you simply misplaced it and they won't care). But never pay full menu price...

3. Keep your front porch light on at night. Make sure your house is visible. This will decrease delivery time, as the driver won't be getting out of his car to look around the block to see where the hell he is.

4. Have the money ready. It always amazes me when people are given 30-45 minutes to write a check, and they wait until the driver shows up at the door to start looking for their checkbook.

5. This one will start some flame wars, but you should always tip, unless the driver ruined your property, was mean, was ridiculously late, etc. $2-3 dollars is considered the norm (although it's very common for them to get $5 or more), but even a dollar will show them that you are grateful. If you don't tip, you will be known in the kitchen as one of those guys who don't tip. "Oh great, I don't wanna take this" is what the drivers will say when they see the ticket.

6. If something is wrong with the order, call them up. The vast majority of the time (even if they think you're lying), they will give you a free pizza, or something of that nature.

7. When you are done, get the pizza into the fridge as fast as possible. It will give it better texture when you eat it for breakfast the next morning.

8. Always take antacid tablets after eating. I swear nothing gives heartburn like pizza...and you don't want to be discouraged from eating this delicious meal, do you? Of course not.

If you follow these steps, the ordering and consuming process will increase. You will be happier, and you will never forget BlancoNino's wonderful advice. I shall forever warm your hearts with pizza wisdom. Take care, and happy ordering.

That's a lot of rules. Chinese food FTW!
"L23 Please"

 

[shortylickens]

Originally posted by: Whoozyerdaddy
That's a lot of rules. Chinese food FTW! "L23 Please"

I actually prefer chinese some nights.
Just for a little variety, or maybe even Italian. Lasagna and Mannicotti and such.

 

[skrilla]

- Don't send your little kids to the door to pay for the pizza. 9/10 times they keep the change or don't know to tip the driver even if you meant for them to give a tip.


- This one only applies to northern states in the winter....I don't know if you guys have had to deal with this:

Shovel your godd*mn sidewalks. The last thing I want to do is track through a foot of snow and slip and break my neck on my first deliver of the night.

 

[DrPizza]

Originally posted by: BlancoNino

Originally posted by: PaulNEPats

Originally posted by: KingGheedora
NY pizza sucks dude. It's all about Little Ceasar's and Domino's.

Domino's does kick ass, but here at ATOT, everyone considers chain restaurants/pizza joints to be complete trash.

Well, non-chain pizza joints aren't as efficient, are generally more expensive, and often times don't deliver.

biggest wtf of the thread... my sarcasm meter pegged a 10 when I read KingG's reply, then I realized that someone switched the location of my sarcasm meter with my idiot meter.

I lived in a small city where Little Caesar's went out of business because they got little repeat business (their pizza is horrible!). Dominos also has a very low volume compared to the local places.

Re: #2 on the list... if the restaurant has coupons on the internet, their pizza sucks or is over-priced in the first place. (I doubt that many local shops bother with internet coupons.) But, as the OP is from Washington and not NY or Chicago, we can assume the pizza in his area sucks. We'll save the NY vs Chicago for another thread.

But, people who broke #1 was by far my biggest pet peeve... I didn't mind people who asked what the specials of the night were, but I hated this type of phone call:
(6pm)
"Xxxx Pizza, may I help you"
"yeah, are you open?"
"Yes, we are, until midnight."
<in the background>
"MOMMMMMMM, THEY'RE OPEN"
"well, you kids figure out what you want"
"I want a sub"
<back to the phone>
"Can you hold on a minute?"

Tip for Blanconino: it took me a few years to learn this... hit a couple of numbers on the phone, hang up. When they call back, they'll be ready to order and you can simply act stupid about it - "ahhh, I was wondering what happened, I figured you guys hung up" I never had a complaint after I risked irritating customers that way.

Also, the porch light helps, but a good driver will immediately drive to the correct block, and be within 2 houses before he even starts to look for a house number. House numbers tend to be sequential, even on one side, odd on the other. Odd on the left as you head away from the post office, IIRC.

 

[Savarak]

Originally posted by: BlancoNino

Originally posted by: shortylickens
"1. Never pay full menu price, especially if you are ordering a lot of pizza"
WTF?


I do agree with the rest of the tips though.

If you order a lot of pizza, you will get a good deal on it. They will give every other pizza half off. Also, I doubt you're going to find 10 jumbo pizzas worth of coupons or specials.

fixed.

 

[sandorski]

What Pizza place takes a cheque? Cash, CC, or Debit(limited availability) should be what's used to pay for pizza.

 

[ForumMaster]

:laugh: just had pizza now for lunch.

 

[Pepsi90919]

Never pay full menu price,

wtf? pizza places aren't car dealerships

 

[jonnyGURU]

After I took the Tombstone out of the oven, I threw a couple $1's in there for good measure.

 

[Marinski]

I would ignore #6. Don't call back and complain that they got your order wrong and get a free pizza. I have friends who used to work in pizza places and you dont wanna know what they did to peoples pizza who called and complained about anything.

 

[BlancoNino]

How do you guys not understand my rule? Don't pay menu price unless you're ordering a lot of pizzas. You WILL GET A GOOD DISCOUNT, sometimes a better price per pizza than if using a good coupon. If not, the pizza place sucks.

 

[ActuaryTm]

Originally posted by: BlancoNino
How do you guys not understand my rule? Don't pay menu price unless you're ordering a lot of pizzas.

It is becoming blatantly apparent why you deliver pizzas for a living.

 

[Spydermag68]

I have another important rule that I totally forgot about.

DO NOT LET YOU 5 YEAR OLD KID ORDER THE PIZZA. I AM NO THE KID'S GRANDPARENT, SO I DO NOT WANT TO WASTE MY TIME TALKING TO YOUR KID!

 

[shortylickens]

Originally posted by: ActuaryTm

Originally posted by: BlancoNino
How do you guys not understand my rule? Don't pay menu price unless you're ordering a lot of pizzas.

It is becoming blatantly apparent why you deliver pizzas for a living.

I did not want to crap on the guy personally, but yes, its becoming clear.

 

[waggy]

Originally posted by: Spydermag68
I have another important rule that I totally forgot about.

DO NOT LET YOU 5 YEAR OLD KID ORDER THE PIZZA. I AM NO THE KID'S GRANDPARENT, SO I DO NOT WANT TO WASTE MY TIME TALKING TO YOUR KID!

oh god i hated that when i deliverd pizza's. i would just hang up on them. I had one parent call back and complain. i just said i thought it was some kid playing with the phone heh.

 

[BigJ]

Originally posted by: shortylickens

Originally posted by: ActuaryTm

Originally posted by: BlancoNino
How do you guys not understand my rule? Don't pay menu price unless you're ordering a lot of pizzas.

It is becoming blatantly apparent why you deliver pizzas for a living.

I did not want to crap on the guy personally, but yes, its becoming clear.

Why don't you guys quote the rest of what he said?

You WILL GET A GOOD DISCOUNT, sometimes a better price per pizza than if using a good coupon. If not, the pizza place sucks.

Seems pretty clear to me. If you don't use a coupon and pay menu price, the pizza places will then generously discount what you ordered.

 

[Syringer]

Read this statement over again and carefully, "Don't pay menu price unless you're ordering a lot of pizzas."

 

[savvy]

Wow.

 

[Whoozyerdaddy]

Originally posted by: BigJ

Originally posted by: shortylickens

Originally posted by: ActuaryTm

Originally posted by: BlancoNino
How do you guys not understand my rule? Don't pay menu price unless you're ordering a lot of pizzas.

It is becoming blatantly apparent why you deliver pizzas for a living.

I did not want to crap on the guy personally, but yes, its becoming clear.

Why don't you guys quote the rest of what he said?

You WILL GET A GOOD DISCOUNT, sometimes a better price per pizza than if using a good coupon. If not, the pizza place sucks.

Seems pretty clear to me. If you don't use a coupon and pay menu price, the pizza places will then generously discount what you ordered.

What pizza place on this earth does that? Maybe it's an Alaska thing but I've never had anyone offer a discount for ordering in bulk above and beyond whatever special might be going on at the time.

 

[BigJ]

Originally posted by: Whoozyerdaddy

Originally posted by: BigJ

Originally posted by: shortylickens

Originally posted by: ActuaryTm

Originally posted by: BlancoNino
How do you guys not understand my rule? Don't pay menu price unless you're ordering a lot of pizzas.

It is becoming blatantly apparent why you deliver pizzas for a living.

I did not want to crap on the guy personally, but yes, its becoming clear.

Why don't you guys quote the rest of what he said?

You WILL GET A GOOD DISCOUNT, sometimes a better price per pizza than if using a good coupon. If not, the pizza place sucks.

Seems pretty clear to me. If you don't use a coupon and pay menu price, the pizza places will then generously discount what you ordered.

What pizza place on this earth does that? Maybe it's an Alaska thing but I've never had anyone offer a discount for ordering in bulk above and beyond whatever special might be going on at the time.

At one my old pizza places, we'd often have deals for people that ordered > 10 pies. At the very least, we'd take off 1-2 pies and throw in a tray of garlic knots (approx 80).

If they were a repeat customer, we'd take off a couple of pies and throw in knots and 2-liters.

Chains normally will not do this. Mom&Pop places certainly will.

 

[Pepsi90919]

Originally posted by: BlancoNino
How do you guys not understand my rule? Don't pay menu price unless you're ordering a lot of pizzas. You WILL GET A GOOD DISCOUNT, sometimes a better price per pizza than if using a good coupon. If not, the pizza place sucks.

i know plenty of (and have worked in) pizza places that don't "suck" and they don't have this ridiculous policy of bargaining the price of a pizza. get out more.