I would have preferred a quicker, less agonizing death...

[Andres3605]

"You die of a massive heart attack during extremely wild sex, only seconds before orgasm"


why before

 

[Xyclone]

"You are mauled to death by a rabid pitbull."

 

[nissan720]

While mowing the lawn barefoot, you accidentally run over your foot, severing your toes. Unable to walk, you bleed to death in your lawn.

 

[CptFarlow]

"While in a movie theater, a crazed man with a gun begins firing shots randomly. You're struck in the back of the head and fall slumped over in your seat as blood pours from your mouth."

Damn, the third guy to get shot in a theater. Abraham Lincoln, the guy sitting in front of PeeWee Herman, then me...

 

[BrianH1]

Being depressed with life in general, you commit suicide by cutting your throat with a hacksaw.

 

[AlienCraft]

While sunbathing in your yard, a commercial airliner accidentally unloads its waste tank. You are impaled by several spears of frozen urine which fall from 30,000 feet above you.

 

[Swag1138]

While in a movie theater, a crazed man with a gun begins firing shots randomly. You're struck in the back of the head and fall slumped over in your seat as blood pours from your mouth.

Still better than watching Gigli. Zing!

 

[archcommus]

The Death Psychic has stepped out for a moment and will return shortly. While you wait, why not check out the rest of the site?

 

[mitaiwan82]

"Upset over the recent breakup with your girlfriend, you shoot her to death and then proceed to kill yourself."

 

[captains]

A crazed man in a hardware store fatally attacks you with a garden hoe.

 

[alexeikgb]

While you're walking down a busy street, a suicidal maniac jumps from an apartment window thirty stories above you. Unfortunately for both of you, the maniac lands directly on you. You're crushed to death, and the suicidal maniac walks away unscathed.

 

[Continuity28]

"An improperly hung ceiling fan falls from above you while it's running. The fast-moving blades slice through your neck with ease, launching your head across the room."

Very creepy considering theres a loose ceiling fan that wobbles right above my head.

 

[archcommus]

While running to your car, you stumble on a curb and your body is thrown violently to the street. Moments later, you are engulfed and mutilated by a street sweeper.

 

[randomlinh]

Upset over the recent breakup with your girlfriend, you shoot her to death and then proceed to kill yourself.

 

[SithSolo1]

"Being depressed with life in general, you commit suicide by driving into oncoming traffic on the highway."

Hrmmm, the thought may have crossed my mind once or twice.... :Q

 

[skace]

Great, even my death is pitiful: While attempting to remove a slice of burnt toast from your toaster using a metal fork, you're electrocuted

 

[SnipeMasterJ13]

While sleeping, you're tied to your bed by your girlfriend and peeled to death using a vegetable peeler.

Sweet, atleast I had a girlfriend.

 

[draganjr]

"After you rudely push your way through a crowded line at the zoo, a large, angry man picks you up and throws you over a guardrail into the bear pit. Being only minutes before feeding time, you are quickly devoured by the hungry beasts"

I'll :beer: to that!

 

[MrDingleDangle]

During a routine haircut, your stylist violently sneezes and inadvertently stabs you in the neck with a pair of scissors, severing your carotid artery.

 

[Papagayo]

You are involved in a car accident while failing to wear your seatbelt. You are thrown through the windshield, and your lifeless body is splattered onto the street.

 

[virtuamike]

Stupid hoe.

A crazed man in a hardware store fatally attacks you with a garden hoe.

 

[SofaKing]

"You get out of bed late one night to investigate a strange sound. Minutes later, you're cornered by several intruders and are beaten to death with your own fireplace tools."

 

[Kanalua]

During a severe storm, a tree falls onto your house, crushing and killing you.

Lucky!

 

[UNCjigga]

As the unfortunate target of a serial killer, you're beaten and tortured for days. While you're still alive, your body is put into a meat grinder and ground up.

:Q

 

[DAPUNISHER]

While on a roller coaster, the ride malfunctions, and you fall from the car to your death, several hundred feet below.

My Wifey&kid will be rich