I have been with someone for 2 months...

Zysoclaplem

Diamond Member
Sep 26, 2003
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Is that normal after 2 months? I am in no way ready to say I love him. I care about him, but I am not in love. When he said it, I just kind of stared at him, smiled, and I just didn't know what to say.

Update: He said he realizes it was kind of early, and he isn't upset about me not being ready to say it yet. He says I should say it when I am ready and he wouldn't want it any other way.
 

PricklyPete

Lifer
Sep 17, 2002
14,582
162
106
Be open with him and let him know how you feel. Nothing wrong with moving slowly. Even if I felt that way, I generally give myself at least 6 months to make sure the feeling is genuine and not a fleeting lust before I have ever said "I love you".

Heck, I knew I was going to marry my fiance after our first date...but I didn't tell her that I loved her until nearly 7 months.
 

Scarpozzi

Lifer
Jun 13, 2000
26,391
1,780
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Does he want you to meet his parents? I once had a girl tell me that after 1 date.

As for your situation, I knew I loved my last g/f after only a few weeks. At 2 months, I was pretty sure we'd get hitched, and we did. If you think you could love this guy, hang in there and see if feelings develop. If you don't, break it to him gently and move on to your next conquest. No need in dragging things out and hurting him more by letting his feelings get stronger.
 

Jeeebus

Diamond Member
Aug 29, 2006
9,181
901
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I'm not sure he wanted you to say anything so much as he wanted you to put out.
 

shadow9d9

Diamond Member
Jul 6, 2004
8,132
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I've always said it within 1 month... I am married now. I guess I just feel love more than others.
 

Zysoclaplem

Diamond Member
Sep 26, 2003
8,799
0
0
Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Does he want you to meet his parents? I once had a girl tell me that after 1 date.

As for your situation, I knew I loved my last g/f after only a few weeks. At 2 months, I was pretty sure we'd get hitched, and we did. If you think you could love this guy, hang in there and see if feelings develop. If you don't, break it to him gently and move on to your next conquest. No need in dragging things out and hurting him more by letting his feelings get stronger.

No no, I like him, and want to continue dating him, but I am just not ready to say love.
 

Aikouka

Lifer
Nov 27, 2001
30,383
912
126
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Is that normal after 2 months? I am in no way ready to say I love him. I care about him, but I am not in love. When he said it, I just kind of stared at him, smiled, and I just didn't know what to say.

Tell him what you told us :). You may need to sugarcoat it a bit so he doesn't think anything awry of the situation (sometimes males tend to look into a situation much more than you should, because they suspect that there may be more to it). He may also be one of those guys that tends to love easily, as another poster mentioned with fleeting love.

Good luck and I hope it goes well!
 

leftyman

Diamond Member
Sep 15, 2000
7,073
3
81
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Does he want you to meet his parents? I once had a girl tell me that after 1 date.

As for your situation, I knew I loved my last g/f after only a few weeks. At 2 months, I was pretty sure we'd get hitched, and we did. If you think you could love this guy, hang in there and see if feelings develop. If you don't, break it to him gently and move on to your next conquest. No need in dragging things out and hurting him more by letting his feelings get stronger.

No no, I like him, and want to continue dating him, but I am just not ready to say love.

so your saying you can "grow to love someone" ?
 

Zysoclaplem

Diamond Member
Sep 26, 2003
8,799
0
0
Originally posted by: Aikouka
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Is that normal after 2 months? I am in no way ready to say I love him. I care about him, but I am not in love. When he said it, I just kind of stared at him, smiled, and I just didn't know what to say.

Tell him what you told us :). You may need to sugarcoat it a bit so he doesn't think anything awry of the situation (sometimes males tend to look into a situation much more than you should, because they suspect that there may be more to it). He may also be one of those guys that tends to love easily, as another poster mentioned with fleeting love.

Good luck and I hope it goes well!

I am his first boyfriend and his first sexual experience.
 

j00fek

Diamond Member
Dec 19, 2005
8,099
1
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Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Aikouka
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Is that normal after 2 months? I am in no way ready to say I love him. I care about him, but I am not in love. When he said it, I just kind of stared at him, smiled, and I just didn't know what to say.

Tell him what you told us :). You may need to sugarcoat it a bit so he doesn't think anything awry of the situation (sometimes males tend to look into a situation much more than you should, because they suspect that there may be more to it). He may also be one of those guys that tends to love easily, as another poster mentioned with fleeting love.

Good luck and I hope it goes well!

I am his first boyfriend and his first sexual experience.

:Q
 

chrisms

Diamond Member
Mar 9, 2003
6,615
0
0
How old are you? If he got laid for the first time 2 months is relatively short time to have said it. If my first wasn't a one night stand I would've told her within a week had it meant I kept getting some.

Of course now I've matured. Or maybe I haven't.
 

Zysoclaplem

Diamond Member
Sep 26, 2003
8,799
0
0
Originally posted by: chrisms
How old are you? If he got laid for the first time 2 months is relatively short time to have said it. If my first wasn't a one night stand I would've told her within a week had it meant I kept getting some.

Of course now I've matured. Or maybe I haven't.

I'm 25. He is 18.
 

pontifex

Lifer
Dec 5, 2000
43,804
46
91
Originally posted by: leftyman
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Does he want you to meet his parents? I once had a girl tell me that after 1 date.

As for your situation, I knew I loved my last g/f after only a few weeks. At 2 months, I was pretty sure we'd get hitched, and we did. If you think you could love this guy, hang in there and see if feelings develop. If you don't, break it to him gently and move on to your next conquest. No need in dragging things out and hurting him more by letting his feelings get stronger.

No no, I like him, and want to continue dating him, but I am just not ready to say love.

so your saying you can "grow to love someone" ?

so you're saying that you love people the 1st time you meet them or what?
 

leftyman

Diamond Member
Sep 15, 2000
7,073
3
81
Originally posted by: pontifex
Originally posted by: leftyman
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Does he want you to meet his parents? I once had a girl tell me that after 1 date.

As for your situation, I knew I loved my last g/f after only a few weeks. At 2 months, I was pretty sure we'd get hitched, and we did. If you think you could love this guy, hang in there and see if feelings develop. If you don't, break it to him gently and move on to your next conquest. No need in dragging things out and hurting him more by letting his feelings get stronger.

No no, I like him, and want to continue dating him, but I am just not ready to say love.

so your saying you can "grow to love someone" ?

so you're saying that you love people the 1st time you meet them or what?

Im saying after two months you got a pretty good idea if you are in love or deciding what you feel is love.
 

SonnyDaze

Diamond Member
Jul 31, 2004
6,867
3
76
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Aikouka
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Is that normal after 2 months? I am in no way ready to say I love him. I care about him, but I am not in love. When he said it, I just kind of stared at him, smiled, and I just didn't know what to say.

Tell him what you told us :). You may need to sugarcoat it a bit so he doesn't think anything awry of the situation (sometimes males tend to look into a situation much more than you should, because they suspect that there may be more to it). He may also be one of those guys that tends to love easily, as another poster mentioned with fleeting love.

Good luck and I hope it goes well!

I am his first boyfriend and his first sexual experience.

Ding!! Winnar!! That's most likely what it is he loves.....the sexual experience with you. If he had it with someone else, chances are he would be in love with them.
 

Zysoclaplem

Diamond Member
Sep 26, 2003
8,799
0
0
Originally posted by: leftyman
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Does he want you to meet his parents? I once had a girl tell me that after 1 date.

As for your situation, I knew I loved my last g/f after only a few weeks. At 2 months, I was pretty sure we'd get hitched, and we did. If you think you could love this guy, hang in there and see if feelings develop. If you don't, break it to him gently and move on to your next conquest. No need in dragging things out and hurting him more by letting his feelings get stronger.

No no, I like him, and want to continue dating him, but I am just not ready to say love.

so your saying you can "grow to love someone" ?

Over time, feelings grow stronger or weaker. My feelings for him are not strong enough to describe them as love.
 

leftyman

Diamond Member
Sep 15, 2000
7,073
3
81
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: leftyman
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Does he want you to meet his parents? I once had a girl tell me that after 1 date.

As for your situation, I knew I loved my last g/f after only a few weeks. At 2 months, I was pretty sure we'd get hitched, and we did. If you think you could love this guy, hang in there and see if feelings develop. If you don't, break it to him gently and move on to your next conquest. No need in dragging things out and hurting him more by letting his feelings get stronger.

No no, I like him, and want to continue dating him, but I am just not ready to say love.

so your saying you can "grow to love someone" ?

Over time, feelings grow stronger or weaker. My feelings for him are not strong enough to describe them as love.

then in all fairness to him maybe you should say something to that effect?

 

Zysoclaplem

Diamond Member
Sep 26, 2003
8,799
0
0
Originally posted by: SonnyDaze
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Aikouka
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Is that normal after 2 months? I am in no way ready to say I love him. I care about him, but I am not in love. When he said it, I just kind of stared at him, smiled, and I just didn't know what to say.

Tell him what you told us :). You may need to sugarcoat it a bit so he doesn't think anything awry of the situation (sometimes males tend to look into a situation much more than you should, because they suspect that there may be more to it). He may also be one of those guys that tends to love easily, as another poster mentioned with fleeting love.

Good luck and I hope it goes well!

I am his first boyfriend and his first sexual experience.

Ding!! Winnar!! That's most likely what it is he loves.....the sexual experience with you. If he had it with someone else, chances are he would be in love with them.

No, he cares about me. He has mistaken that for love, as he has never been in love before.
I have been in love, and I know what it can do to you and how very painful it is.
 

Zysoclaplem

Diamond Member
Sep 26, 2003
8,799
0
0
Originally posted by: leftyman
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: leftyman
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Does he want you to meet his parents? I once had a girl tell me that after 1 date.

As for your situation, I knew I loved my last g/f after only a few weeks. At 2 months, I was pretty sure we'd get hitched, and we did. If you think you could love this guy, hang in there and see if feelings develop. If you don't, break it to him gently and move on to your next conquest. No need in dragging things out and hurting him more by letting his feelings get stronger.

No no, I like him, and want to continue dating him, but I am just not ready to say love.

so your saying you can "grow to love someone" ?

Over time, feelings grow stronger or weaker. My feelings for him are not strong enough to describe them as love.

then in all fairness to him maybe you should say something to that effect?

I told him I wasn't ready to say love.
 

chrisms

Diamond Member
Mar 9, 2003
6,615
0
0
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: chrisms
How old are you? If he got laid for the first time 2 months is relatively short time to have said it. If my first wasn't a one night stand I would've told her within a week had it meant I kept getting some.

Of course now I've matured. Or maybe I haven't.

I'm 25. He is 18.

Hello Mrs. Robinson
 

leftyman

Diamond Member
Sep 15, 2000
7,073
3
81
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: leftyman
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: leftyman
Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Does he want you to meet his parents? I once had a girl tell me that after 1 date.

As for your situation, I knew I loved my last g/f after only a few weeks. At 2 months, I was pretty sure we'd get hitched, and we did. If you think you could love this guy, hang in there and see if feelings develop. If you don't, break it to him gently and move on to your next conquest. No need in dragging things out and hurting him more by letting his feelings get stronger.

No no, I like him, and want to continue dating him, but I am just not ready to say love.

so your saying you can "grow to love someone" ?

Over time, feelings grow stronger or weaker. My feelings for him are not strong enough to describe them as love.

then in all fairness to him maybe you should say something to that effect?

I told him I wasn't ready to say love.

Is that normal after 2 months? I am in no way ready to say I love him. I care about him, but I am not in love. When he said it, I just kind of stared at him, smiled, and I just didn't know what to say.

;)