Has anyone here had a vasectomy?

[KingPhil]

Originally posted by: Isla
My husband had one. He survived and now enjoys my deepest shows of appreciation.

Do tell......... :camera:'s??

 

[shimsham]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Ranger X

Originally posted by: moshquerade

unwanted? do you know how many people want to adopt in this country?

And do you know how many unwanted children are born to this world? In a perfect world, planned pregnancies are 100% but unfortunately, we do not live in a perfect world. How many people admit that their child wasn't planned? Not many.

what the fvck does that have to do with anything. probably half of the children out there are unplanned. hell, i know i was an "whoops", but that doesn't mean my parents regretted having me.

both of mine were "unplanned" in so far as timing. always knew i wanted them, but not quite so early. now that i have them, and ill only be 43 when my youngest hits 18, im glad they came when they did. more years to enjoy the empty nest and grandchildren. the long-term advantages far outweigh any short-term sacrafices my wife and i have had to make.

 

[ITJunkie]

Originally posted by: iwantanewcomputer

Originally posted by: Fritzo
OK, I have some time now to tell the tale:

My wife made the appt. for me, and I go to the doctor, who's name is (I am NOT kidding here) Dr. Dick Tapper. I didn't feel too comfortable with that, but I find out the guy is like a leader in the field, so I feel better. If you've done 20000 of these things, you can't screw it up. The next visit, I have to strip and put on a butt showing gown, then they put me on a table not unlike that one in the Frankenstein movies (sans those lightning shooting ball thingies).

Jeff the Gay Nurse comes in while I'm on the table, and goes "HI HI THIMPLY HI! You're here to get your vas snipped today?" I didn't know how to respond to that, so stupidly I go "Uhhh...yes." Jeff then flips open the undercarriage and starts inspecting the patient. He mentions something about a jungle, then starts shaving (my vision is blocked by a sheet- probably don't want to watch someone holding a razor down there anyway). I personally think he spent a little too much time down there, but then again, I can't see what he's doing.

Dr. Tapper arrives, and exclaimed "Finally...a large set! Those are so much easier. Been working on little guys all day!" I took that as a compliment. The Dr. asks Jeff the Gay Nurse to get the anesthetic ready. I'm thinking I'm going to get gassed or something...then Jeff the Gay Nurse proceeds to pull out THE BIGGEST FREAKIN NEEDLE I'VE EVER SEEN!!! Dr. Tapper pinches my sack quite firmly and says "You're going to feel a little pinch." Before I can say "MOMMY!" the Dr. jabs THE BIGGEST FREAKIN NEEDLE I'VE EVER SEEN through the sack area. The length of this needle surely went all the way though, then through the mattress and the anesthetic drained into a bucket underneath (this is an insurance scam- they probably reuse it for the next poor sap). The resulting sensation was not unlike someone wearing spiked steel toe boots getting a running start and doing a flying Ju-Su-Kwan-Do kick directly on the bull's-eye. My breath was taken away, so there was no scream, but there was a bit of a full body spasm. Jeff The Gay Nurse took my hand and started saying "You'll be OK in a minute." Jeff The Gay Nurse did not make me feel better.

Numbness set in around the loins, and once again I was at rest. Then, as if he was performing some kind of blessing ceremony, the good Dr. starts holding his tools up to the light one by one to inspect them. First there was this miniature meat hook, then a tiny scythe looking thing (something the Grim Reaper for Midgets would carry), a soldiering iron (again...not kidding. At least it wasn't an arc welder- my insurance didn't cover that).

Dr. Tapper and Jeff The Gay Nurse crouch over and get to work. It sounds like they're shaking a silverware tray down there, and I feel pokes and prods, but nothing bad. The Dr. says "OK, you're going to feel a little tug." No problem...I've been tugging that area for years. What he failed to mention was he was going to be tugging my innards out through a hole he made while distracting me with a shaking silverware tray...the bastard!!! This was a strange feeling...as if someone tied a string to your intestines and started to pull them out of an orifice. I let out a hearty ascending "ooooOOOOOOOOOOOHGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" Jeff The Gay Nurse promptly gave the good Dr. another needle, which he didn't bother inserting (why bother, my insides were outside at that point) and he started squirting the needle all over. "Better?" he asked. "Yes...*pant pant*....that much...*pant pant*...better." I was ready to ask if I could suck on one of those syringe things in the hopes I would be knocked out.

Misfortune came my way in the form of a loose sheet. The blocking sheet fell down on one side, allowing me to see the good Dr. holding a tube (much like a piece of spaghetti) out of a hole in the sack with a little meat hook, and then getting ready to SOLDIER IT!!! I was like an XBox waiting for a mod chip! He sticks it on the tube, which begins to smoke. My nuts were smoking. Yes...smoking. The tube breaks, and then he ties a square knot in both ends (I confirmed this with my Cub Scout manual after the procedure). The nuts stopped smoking around this point, which is a good thing. Jeff The Gay Nurse gave the good Dr. a needle and some thread...sewed up a couple of things with a lovely cross stitch...and then declared "All done!" I was told to lay there for 15 minutes to contemplate the tortures that I underwent in order to have nonchildmaking sex. Well...at least I can get busy without fumbling for condoms now.

WRONG!!!! I was told by the hot desk receptionist "No ejaculations for 2 weeks"..as if she were mocking my situation. 2 WEEKS! The last time I went 2 weeks without spilling some was when I was 16 and broke both arms---and even then I found a way! That was the roughest part.

I had to drop off "samples" 4 weeks, 6 weeks, 8 weeks, and 6 months afterwards to make sure I had no swimmers left. It was interesting telling the wife I needed to go crank one off for the doctor. I was deemed sterile after 6 weeks, and the fun began.

Only side effect is I get a bit of itching around the scar. I didn't get any swelling or infections like some people. You're supposed to lay down for three days...I have the feeling that people that don't do this are the ones that get problems. You FEEL like you can go for a 5 mile hike afterwards, but after 30 minutes on your feet you get a throbbing like you won't believe down there (not the good kind either).

So, that's my story. This is also the longest thing I've ever posted to ATOT! Am I supposed to do cliffs or something?

OMG that was Fing hi-larious

:laugh: :thumbsup:

 

[thujone]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Ranger X

Originally posted by: iroast
you might not want it, but what if the woman you end up loving dearly wants children? she might not bug you about it, but she might become depressed. you might change your mind later.

Well that's her problem then, isn't it? The point is that when she signed on, she knew EXACTLY where he stood when it came to having children.

I don't see why people here are trying to convince him to not have a vasectomy. Just because you have children of your own and can't possibly grasp the idea of why anyone young would not want children of their own in the future, here's a bit of newsflash for you. Not everyone thinks like you .. I know that's hard to grasp but it's true.

because he asked for our opinions you self-righteous douche. :roll:

...

I'm just curious about the procedure.

unless you've talked at length with a guy about his procedure... really you're just trying to sway his opinion to not do it. every post you've had in this thread has been strictly against the idea with little to no factual reasons/circumstances to back it up. all you have are what-if's.

he came to this thread with his mind made up looking for experiences on the procedure.

only reason i gave my input is because i'm in a VERY similar situation as him.

if you're gonna be pushy with an opinion, at least go do it in the P&N forum where that kind of stuff is bread and butter.

 

[IronWing]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Ranger X

Originally posted by: iroast
you might not want it, but what if the woman you end up loving dearly wants children? she might not bug you about it, but she might become depressed. you might change your mind later.

Well that's her problem then, isn't it? The point is that when she signed on, she knew EXACTLY where he stood when it came to having children.

I don't see why people here are trying to convince him to not have a vasectomy. Just because you have children of your own and can't possibly grasp the idea of why anyone young would not want children of their own in the future, here's a bit of newsflash for you. Not everyone thinks like you .. I know that's hard to grasp but it's true.

because he asked for our opinions you self-righteous douche. :roll:

No, he asked about the procedure, not the decision to have or not have kids. He clearly stated he doesn't want any children.

Edit: beat me to it.

 

[thujone]

Originally posted by: KingPhil

Originally posted by: Son of a N00b

Originally posted by: Amplifier
Just make her take birth control.

and never gain weight right?

There is a suppository, lasts about 6 years I think, that the woman can have implanted into her uterus. Simple medical procedure. Costs about 400 bucks I think.

Do that every 6 years and you are good. Might even be good for 9 or 10 years, I dont remember.

way more intrusive procedure. and if this is an IUD sort of device... they're actually pretty dangerous/not healthy from everything i've read.

also... "pulling out" won't stop a girl from getting pregnant. i'd try and find a statistic on % effectiveness... but suffice to say... it's pretty damn low i'm sure.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: thujone

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Ranger X

Originally posted by: iroast
you might not want it, but what if the woman you end up loving dearly wants children? she might not bug you about it, but she might become depressed. you might change your mind later.

Well that's her problem then, isn't it? The point is that when she signed on, she knew EXACTLY where he stood when it came to having children.

I don't see why people here are trying to convince him to not have a vasectomy. Just because you have children of your own and can't possibly grasp the idea of why anyone young would not want children of their own in the future, here's a bit of newsflash for you. Not everyone thinks like you .. I know that's hard to grasp but it's true.

because he asked for our opinions you self-righteous douche. :roll:

...

I'm just curious about the procedure.

unless you've talked at length with a guy about his procedure... really you're just trying to sway his opinion to not do it. every post you've had in this thread has been strictly against the idea with little to no factual reasons/circumstances to back it up. all you have are what-if's.

he came to this thread with his mind made up looking for experiences on the procedure.

only reason i gave my input is because i'm in a VERY similar situation as him.

if you're gonna be pushy with an opinion, at least go do it in the P&N forum where that kind of stuff is bread and butter.

he MOST certainly did not come to this thread "with his mind made up"

Originally posted by: Chaotic42
I'm considering getting one when I turn 24, but I'm not sure.

and then a few pages later he posted this:

Originally posted by: Chaotic42
Bump for more opinions.

let the man speak for himself.

 

[IronWing]

Originally posted by: Chaotic42

Originally posted by: Frost Byte
24? Don't you want a child after marriage? Or I assume you can reattach...

I don't want any kids.

It's something I've thought long and hard about and discussed with dozens of people over the course of years. I am completely certain that I do not want a child.

This from the thread before your first post. He was pretty clear on that point.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: ironwing

Originally posted by: Chaotic42

Originally posted by: Frost Byte
24? Don't you want a child after marriage? Or I assume you can reattach...

I don't want any kids.

It's something I've thought long and hard about and discussed with dozens of people over the course of years. I am completely certain that I do not want a child.

This from the thread before your first post. He was pretty clear on that point.

he waffled on that.

Originally posted by: Chaotic42

Originally posted by: moshquerade
are you really gonna do it?

I'm still researching.

If it turns out that by some strange turn of events that I change my mind after it's done, and I feel ready to spend more than $200,000 on raising a kid, I think that I would be able to spend $10,000 to get it undone.

 

[thujone]

i just think going around calling someone a self righteous douche when you seem to be the one trying to think for others is a bit much.



i've just found myself in the same situation as the OP and with similar results of people asking "are you sure?" "yes" "are you REALLY sure?" etc. which seems to be how all your posts have gone.

when you have ppl CONSTANTLY doing this after you've already made up your mind it's hard to not get pushy about it.

so i apologize if i'm being hard on you for every other person who's done this to me in the past 3-4 years of thinking about this

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: thujone
i just think going around calling someone a self righteous douche when you seem to be the one trying to think for others is a bit much.



i've just found myself in the same situation as the OP and with similar results of people asking "are you sure?" "yes" "are you REALLY sure?" etc. which seems to be how all your posts have gone.

when you have ppl CONSTANTLY doing this after you've already made up your mind it's hard to not get pushy about it.

so i apologize if i'm being hard on you for every other person who's done this to me in the past 3-4 years of thinking about this

he hasn't already made up his mind

 

[IronWing]

You're projecting. Some folks don't want kids. Deal with it.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: ironwing
You're projecting. Some folks don't want kids. Deal with it.

he can do as he wishes. i was just showing him that if he has any doubts he shouldn't.

and if you don't like my opinion, tough sh!t.

 

[thujone]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: thujone
i just think going around calling someone a self righteous douche when you seem to be the one trying to think for others is a bit much.



i've just found myself in the same situation as the OP and with similar results of people asking "are you sure?" "yes" "are you REALLY sure?" etc. which seems to be how all your posts have gone.

when you have ppl CONSTANTLY doing this after you've already made up your mind it's hard to not get pushy about it.

so i apologize if i'm being hard on you for every other person who's done this to me in the past 3-4 years of thinking about this

he hasn't already made up his mind

i'm confused too... cuz from everything i read i thought he had.

no sense in discussing this anymore then really.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: thujone

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: thujone
i just think going around calling someone a self righteous douche when you seem to be the one trying to think for others is a bit much.



i've just found myself in the same situation as the OP and with similar results of people asking "are you sure?" "yes" "are you REALLY sure?" etc. which seems to be how all your posts have gone.

when you have ppl CONSTANTLY doing this after you've already made up your mind it's hard to not get pushy about it.

so i apologize if i'm being hard on you for every other person who's done this to me in the past 3-4 years of thinking about this

he hasn't already made up his mind

i'm confused too... cuz from everything i read i thought he had.

no sense in discussing this anymore then really.

read the very first post in this thread. he is "considering", but "not sure".

 

[thujone]

in that case your arguement is moot.

he's already made up his mind that he DOESN'T want to have KIDS.

even if he isn't sure whether or not he wants to have the procedure... your only arguement against it seems to be that he MIGHT want to have kids. which he clearly does NOT want to do.

 

[umbrella39]

Had one after last kid was born at age 28. Pain, yes, hurt before-during-after the procedure. Was it worth it, yes, though some like me do experience epididymal pain and swelling even years afterwards.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: thujone
in that case your arguement is moot.

he's already made up his mind that he DOESN'T want to have KIDS.

even if he isn't sure whether or not he wants to have the procedure... your only arguement against it seems to be that he MIGHT want to have kids. which he clearly does NOT want to do.

can you read or comprehend?

he waffled on his "not wanting to have kids" stance. i posted his quote.

and this is not an arguement, it's my opinion. my opinion is not moot.

 

[thujone]

his "waffle" was a what-if in response to your what-if's.

both of which i put little to no stock in.


i have no problem with your opinion except for the fact that it seems to presuppose that:

1) all people want to have kids. or WILL want to have kids.

2) people below a certain age don't have the foresight to say they don't want to have kids ever.

3) adoption is not a valid option for people that want to have kids

this is what i've gathered from this thread. if i'm way off... let me know.

 

[robisc]

Sorry Fritzo but at your expense your post was the funniest freaking thing I have read in a long time

 

[thujone]

yeah i will mention... that post was one of the best i've read on this board

for both actual info and well written humor lol

 

[Aquila76]

I'm right with you on the 'no kids' idea. I knew since I started seriously dating (22 at the time) that I would never bring a kid into this world. There's too much stuff going on to justify bringing somebody else in to share the misery. I know that there are a great many wonderful / great / terrific / amazing things in this world, too; I just don't believe they sufficiently outweigh the negatives.

 

[Chaotic42]

Alright, let me get some things straight here.

1. I do not want children.
2. I am not sure that I want the procedure done because I don't know enough about it. This does not change #1.
3. The "If it turns out by some strange turn of events..." is, I suppose, mathematically possible, much like it is possible for all of the molecules in the floor and Earth below me to teleport to the moon and for me to fall to China. Possible, but it's not happening.
4. I did indeed ask for opinions. Perhaps there is some side to this whole thing that I haven't looked at. I don't think there is, but there's always that possibility.
5. Though my mind is made up as much as it can be with the knowledge that I have of the whole situation, I appreciate mosh's posts in this thread. It shows caring and compassion that she would bring up these counter-points. Any opinion at all is welcome in this thread as far as I am concerned. I can read around the posts that I don't care about.


I hope that clears some stuff up. Let me be clear though. From everything that I know about the procedure, every consequence that I've thought about over the past few years, and every bit of information that I've gotten from other people, I do not want children.

Whether I have the help of a vasectomy is yet to be determined.

 

[zerocool1]

no, but I know some people there should be a 'do not reproduce order' put out on them.

 

[thujone]

"whatayasay we lighten things up a bit and talk about abortion" - bill hicks