Funniest Chat Quotes

[iRONic]

<ieee1394> So I go out into the hallway and am just turning into the bathroom
<ieee1394> And I see my dad walking into the guest bedroom
<ieee1394> So I'm like: "Hey dad, not getting any again tonight?"
<ieee1394> And he just looks at me and says:
<ieee1394> "Hey son, want me to disconnect the broadband so you can't get any tonight?"
<ieee1394> And all I could do was turn around and go back into my room.

 

[manowar821]

Originally posted by: Garth
For some reason this struck me as particularly funny:

--------------------------
Slimtoad20: US Airways flight 404 is flying through the Bermuda Triangle today.
Slimtoad20: Yeah, that one doesn't stand a chance.

I lol'd at work, thanks.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: RadiclDreamer

Originally posted by: pontifex
most of those have got to be fake.

Still funny even if they are.

true

 

[waggy]

Originally posted by: iRONic
<ieee1394> So I go out into the hallway and am just turning into the bathroom
<ieee1394> And I see my dad walking into the guest bedroom
<ieee1394> So I'm like: "Hey dad, not getting any again tonight?"
<ieee1394> And he just looks at me and says:
<ieee1394> "Hey son, want me to disconnect the broadband so you can't get any tonight?"
<ieee1394> And all I could do was turn around and go back into my room.

hahahahahahah

 

[Quasmo]

<taap> there is no such thing as .ng domain
<`naut> What's Nigeria?
<AcidX> .poor

 

[acid45]

Originally posted by: Quasmo
<taap> there is no such thing as .ng domain
<`naut> What's Nigeria?
<AcidX> .poor

haha

 

[acid45]

#12041 +(258)- [X]

<tarmac> HWO THE RUCK DO I GET THE STUPID ASS FUCKIN PAPER CLIP
<tarmac> TO GO AWAY

 

[acid45]

<radez> i tried slitting my wrist 3 days ago cuz i realized that my life sucked but then
<radez> i wanted to watch coyote ugly

 

[Dean]

..."I put on my robe and wizard hat."

 

[acid45]

<Psi> pancakes!
<Psi>
<Psi> is there anyone who doesn't like them?
<Fenris> nazis.
<Fenris> but you can't blame them.
<Fenris> the only reason they invaded belgium was for the waffles.
<Fenris> those f*ckers love waffles.

 

[TecHNooB]

nm, had to retract.. read a couple more. they're all so hilarious but i cant lol cuz im in a computer room.

 

[Agentbolt]

<someone> I liked the Swedish Chef the best
<someone else> Beeker wanted to kill people
<someone else> You could tell
<another someone else> It was in his eyes

Can't recall the names, but I always thought that was hysterical. I must be easily amused.

 

[iRONic]

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Thank you for listening to me.
<xxxGirlygirlxxx> You know your a really good listener.
<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Sweety please say something.
<Sandaedar> Ok I'm back.

 

[Saint Michael]

Too vulgar to paste into this forum, but here's the link: http://www.bash.org/?246405

 

[AMCRambler]

Originally posted by: Dean
..."I put on my robe and wizard hat."

#1 in my book!

 

[Dean]

This is my fav:

bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.

j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.

j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.

j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*cking charge your ass.

j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.

bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.

bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.

j_gurli3: thats it.

bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.

 

[Ns1]

Originally posted by: Dean
..."I put on my robe and wizard hat."

/thread

 

[manowar821]

Originally posted by: Saint Michael
Too vulgar to paste into this forum, but here's the link: http://www.bash.org/?246405

That one is amazing...

 

[iRONic]

<Cheshire> I can't afford those plastic things to cover the electric sockets so I just draw bunny faces on the electric outlets to scare the kids away from them...
<RLtim> Newsflash! Kids aren't afraid of bunnies.
<Cheshire> Oh they will be...

 

[TecHNooB]

Originally posted by: manowar821

Originally posted by: Saint Michael
Too vulgar to paste into this forum, but here's the link: http://www.bash.org/?246405

That one is amazing...

Post it here! Outside links are dangerous........

 

[Ns1]

Originally posted by: TecHNooB

Originally posted by: manowar821

Originally posted by: Saint Michael
Too vulgar to paste into this forum, but here's the link: http://www.bash.org/?246405

That one is amazing...

Post it here! Outside links are dangerous........

only dangerous if you're a technoob

 

[manowar821]

Originally posted by: TecHNooB

Originally posted by: manowar821

Originally posted by: Saint Michael
Too vulgar to paste into this forum, but here's the link: http://www.bash.org/?246405

That one is amazing...

Post it here! Outside links are dangerous........

For freedom!

<[BAC]Draxon|TWL> "The animals will hear!" bellowed the ear licking penguin as the awesomely endowed midget sucked her oozing charlies and plugged his purple middle leg into her festering wise and beautiful woman.
<[BAC]Draxon|TWL> oops
<[BAC]Draxon|TWL> wrong window
<d|syztem> what the FUCK

Please dont b&...

 

[Beev]

Originally posted by: iRONic
<Cheshire> I can't afford those plastic things to cover the electric sockets so I just draw bunny faces on the electric outlets to scare the kids away from them...
<RLtim> Newsflash! Kids aren't afraid of bunnies.
<Cheshire> Oh they will be...

Wow, what a blatant, word-for-word rip off from the Simpsons. Of course, I've seen a word for word Family Guy and Futurama quote on there too.

 

[BrownTown]

Wow, a funny thread that is actually funny!

 

[KoolDrew]

Not really funny, but so true...

<DigiGnome> Real life should have a fucking search function, or something.
<DigiGnome> I need my socks.