for those who are married or intend to get married...

Page 2 - Seeking answers? Join the AnandTech community: where nearly half-a-million members share solutions and discuss the latest tech.

Pliablemoose

Lifer
Oct 11, 1999
25,195
0
56
1st time me 29, her 31
2nd time me 39 her 27

The older you are, typically the more financially stable you are, the better environment you can give your children.

Plus, by the time you're 30/40 you have lots of scars, and chicks dig scars:)

 

Ilmater

Diamond Member
Jun 13, 2002
7,516
1
0
Originally posted by: Pliablemoose
1st time me 29, her 31
2nd time me 39 her 27

The older you are, typically the more financially stable you are, the better environment you can give your children.

Plus, by the time you're 30/40 you have lots of scars, and chicks dig scars:)
Sounds like you're doing even better the second time around. ;)

It doesn't matter when you get married. There's no right time. The wrong time is any time before you're 21. I don't care how many marriages last that start before this time, but you're just too young to know what you want in life. You're just asking for problems.
 

Kenazo

Lifer
Sep 15, 2000
10,429
1
81
Originally posted by: csaddict
I will be 29 in May. I got married last February 14th. My wife is 22. We have 2 children ages 3.75 and 2.

I met her when she was 17 and we have been dating ever since.
Wow, you like younger women, huh? ;)

Anyway, my wife and I were both 22 when we got married, that was 2 years ago now! (wow, time flies). For us it was the right time. Kids? We're hoping the pharmacist is worth the money we pay him for pills. :)
 

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Administrator
Mar 5, 2001
49,606
164
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
Married at 22
kid #1 at 23
kid #2 at 24

I can play sports with them... football, etc. without needing to use a walker
We listen to a lot of the same music.
Much more fun taking them to amusement parks, etc. I don't have to stand and watch them ride - I can go on the rides too. (go to an amusement park and count the number of 50 yr olds on rides... not many of them - typically younger families)

And the kids will be gone to college when I'm 42. Early enough for me to seriously consider returning for a phd.

 

DarkManXY2G

Senior member
Dec 4, 2000
582
0
0
Engaged now we are both 23. We will be married at the end of this year or beginning of next year. We will both be 24 at that point.
 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,028
2,033
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Originally posted by: CPA
It amazes me when people think getting married in the mid-20's is surprising.

My mom was married when she was 18. It used to be that way all the time, even younger.

Now we consider a 22 year old a teenager and believe you shouldn't get married until your 30. Why?
Because you ruin your life and your future prospects in all areas of life by marrying and having kids early,you also hamper the prospects of your children as the younger you have kids the less fiscally stable you are likely to be.
 

Hoober

Diamond Member
Feb 9, 2001
4,361
13
81
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: CPA
It amazes me when people think getting married in the mid-20's is surprising.

My mom was married when she was 18. It used to be that way all the time, even younger.

Now we consider a 22 year old a teenager and believe you shouldn't get married until your 30. Why?
Because you ruin your life and your future prospects in all areas of life by marrying and having kids early,you also hamper the prospects of your children as the younger you have kids the less fiscally stable you are likely to be.
I don't buy that for a second. I'm considered a young father, and I don't believe I've hampered my future prospects in any way. Of course I'm much more fiscally responsible than 90% of the popluation, but still. Having kids while you're still in high school is not a good idea, but I don't believe you ruin your life by having kids in your early or middle twenties.
 

Tiqua

Member
Mar 4, 2004
141
1
0
Got married last year 7/26/03. I was 27 and he was 29. Kids in a couple of years from now.
 

blackdogdeek

Lifer
Mar 14, 2003
14,454
9
81
dating: me 29, her 34
engaged: me 30, her 35
married: me 31, her 36
baby: me 32, her 37

everything was right on.
 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,028
2,033
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Originally posted by: Hoober
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: CPA
It amazes me when people think getting married in the mid-20's is surprising.

My mom was married when she was 18. It used to be that way all the time, even younger.

Now we consider a 22 year old a teenager and believe you shouldn't get married until your 30. Why?
Because you ruin your life and your future prospects in all areas of life by marrying and having kids early,you also hamper the prospects of your children as the younger you have kids the less fiscally stable you are likely to be.
I don't buy that for a second. I'm considered a young father, and I don't believe I've hampered my future prospects in any way. Of course I'm much more fiscally responsible than 90% of the popluation, but still. Having kids while you're still in high school is not a good idea, but I don't believe you ruin your life by having kids in your early or middle twenties.
Yeah,how old are your kids? Come back come divorce time when you aren't left with a dollar or an hour to call your own and tell me how it was all so worth it.If I had it to do over I would have waiterd till much later to marry and have kids and might have passed on having kids entirely.
 

vi edit

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Oct 28, 1999
62,117
7,275
126
Because you ruin your life and your future prospects in all areas of life by marrying and having kids early,you also hamper the prospects of your children as the younger you have kids the less fiscally stable you are likely to be.
That's certainly not a post I'd expect to see by you. :confused:

Having kids early is certainly more stressful on a young family, but by no means is it the kiss of death and doom on the livelyhood of the family. My parents had me when they both were 20. It wasn't easy, but they managed until they got into full stride in their career. My sister and I turned out just fine and my parents are both quite happy with their current situation.

No kids in the house at the age of 47 and a comfortable income allows them a lot of good years to have fun.
 

waggy

No Lifer
Dec 14, 2000
68,145
9
81
Originally posted by: Buttzilla
how old were you if you are and
how old do you think you'll be when you want to.

it's just i've been hearing quiet a few people getting married at such a young age, early - mid twenties. i dont plan on getting married till after professional school so probably around 30ish.

there's a couple of guys at my work, only 22-25 with a few kids already. i guess when you're ready you're ready but whats the rush?
I was married at 25. I am now 30 and i have a 20 month old daughter.


We took it really slow. The wife and I met in high school. i was her science tutor! i was 18 and she was 15. we started dateing and got married 7 years latter. I think it helped being a little older. If we would have got married younger (like she wanted) i think we would have divorced. We did break up once or twice (for 3 months each time).

 

Jumpem

Lifer
Sep 21, 2000
10,757
3
81
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: Hoober
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: CPA
It amazes me when people think getting married in the mid-20's is surprising.

My mom was married when she was 18. It used to be that way all the time, even younger.

Now we consider a 22 year old a teenager and believe you shouldn't get married until your 30. Why?
Because you ruin your life and your future prospects in all areas of life by marrying and having kids early,you also hamper the prospects of your children as the younger you have kids the less fiscally stable you are likely to be.
I don't buy that for a second. I'm considered a young father, and I don't believe I've hampered my future prospects in any way. Of course I'm much more fiscally responsible than 90% of the popluation, but still. Having kids while you're still in high school is not a good idea, but I don't believe you ruin your life by having kids in your early or middle twenties.
Yeah,how old are your kids? Come back come divorce time when you aren't left with a dollar or an hour to call your own and tell me how it was all so worth it.If I had it to do over I would have waiterd till much later to marry and have kids and might have passed on having kids entirely.
You sound bitter.

 

Descartes

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
13,968
0
0
What's all this nonsense about having them early so you have energy? Who plans to be burnt out at 40? My grandparents were extremely active with all of us well into their 70s, and my parents are still very active in their 50s.

The way I see it, my younger years are a time of full thrust for me to establish a solid foundation for my future family. I don't want to still be building a foundation whilst my child is at home. My fervent ambition now is merely an attempt to buy my freedom later, and that freedom will be spent with my family.
 

mandala

Senior member
Dec 24, 2003
210
0
0
I was 24 when I got married (when I was younger I figured 25 was a good age to get married, so I was pretty close), and my husband was 22. We don't have any kids yet, maybe when I'm 28 or 29 (since I'd like to have a child before I'm 30).
 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,028
2,033
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Originally posted by: vi_edit
Because you ruin your life and your future prospects in all areas of life by marrying and having kids early,you also hamper the prospects of your children as the younger you have kids the less fiscally stable you are likely to be.
That's certainly not a post I'd expect to see by you. :confused:

Having kids early is certainly more stressful on a young family, but by no means is it the kiss of death and doom on the livelyhood of the family. My parents had me when they both were 20. It wasn't easy, but they managed until they got into full stride in their career. My sister and I turned out just fine and my parents are both quite happy with their current situation.

No kids in the house at the age of 47 and a comfortable income allows them a lot of good years to have fun.



Why are you confused? I'm 47 and will probably work till I drop dead because divorce and 24/7 responsibilty for 3 kids left nothing to save for me for later,our situation also hurt the kids in more ways than one.If I had it to do over,knowing as I do now I probably wouldn't,the price paid by all was too great.

My advice,get a great education,travel,waste time and money on you date a lot,sleep with as many attractive people who will let you.Marry and have kids when you get it out of your system.Having kids is a forever after deal and once they are here for all intensive purposes you cease to exist and only their needs matter which can be a bitter pill to swallow if none of your own needs ever managed to get met along the way or if after a few years of marriage you find yourself divorced and rowing the good ship parenthood alone.
 

Descartes

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
13,968
0
0
Originally posted by: Jumpem
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: Hoober
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: CPA
It amazes me when people think getting married in the mid-20's is surprising.

My mom was married when she was 18. It used to be that way all the time, even younger.

Now we consider a 22 year old a teenager and believe you shouldn't get married until your 30. Why?
Because you ruin your life and your future prospects in all areas of life by marrying and having kids early,you also hamper the prospects of your children as the younger you have kids the less fiscally stable you are likely to be.
I don't buy that for a second. I'm considered a young father, and I don't believe I've hampered my future prospects in any way. Of course I'm much more fiscally responsible than 90% of the popluation, but still. Having kids while you're still in high school is not a good idea, but I don't believe you ruin your life by having kids in your early or middle twenties.
Yeah,how old are your kids? Come back come divorce time when you aren't left with a dollar or an hour to call your own and tell me how it was all so worth it.If I had it to do over I would have waiterd till much later to marry and have kids and might have passed on having kids entirely.
You sound bitter.
You'd be naive if you didn't consider the experiences of all of those before you, bitter or not. People rush into marriage and children without considering the consequences. I know only one thing: When I have children I want to be unequivocally certain that I will not be in a position that hinders them. All too often, people have children thinking it's some biological right that should be expressed independent of social context, imo.
 

ryzmah

Senior member
Feb 17, 2003
474
0
0
Married at 21 (wife was 23), first child at 23 - Ideally I would have waited another year or two to have kids to get settled into my career, but on the whole I'm quite happy with the decisions we made. Don't miss non-married life at all and love being a parent - just would have been better to pay back some of the college debt before parenthood.
 

CPA

Elite Member
Nov 19, 2001
30,322
4
0
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: CPA
It amazes me when people think getting married in the mid-20's is surprising.

My mom was married when she was 18. It used to be that way all the time, even younger.

Now we consider a 22 year old a teenager and believe you shouldn't get married until your 30. Why?
Because you ruin your life and your future prospects in all areas of life by marrying and having kids early,you also hamper the prospects of your children as the younger you have kids the less fiscally stable you are likely to be.

What?!? that's nonsense. How is your life ruined by starting a family?
 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,028
2,033
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Originally posted by: Jumpem
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: Hoober
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: CPA
It amazes me when people think getting married in the mid-20's is surprising.

My mom was married when she was 18. It used to be that way all the time, even younger.

Now we consider a 22 year old a teenager and believe you shouldn't get married until your 30. Why?
Because you ruin your life and your future prospects in all areas of life by marrying and having kids early,you also hamper the prospects of your children as the younger you have kids the less fiscally stable you are likely to be.
I don't buy that for a second. I'm considered a young father, and I don't believe I've hampered my future prospects in any way. Of course I'm much more fiscally responsible than 90% of the popluation, but still. Having kids while you're still in high school is not a good idea, but I don't believe you ruin your life by having kids in your early or middle twenties.
Yeah,how old are your kids? Come back come divorce time when you aren't left with a dollar or an hour to call your own and tell me how it was all so worth it.If I had it to do over I would have waiterd till much later to marry and have kids and might have passed on having kids entirely.
You sound bitter.

I'm speaking some hard truth here.Lots of marriages end in divorce and many times one parent gets stuck pulling the good ship parenthood and all the sacrificres that entails...alone. Sorry but if I'd had any idea at age 21 that this was how things would have turned out I'd have waited.My kids turned out ok but life sure could have been better for them and for me.
 

ASK THE COMMUNITY