Do you believe its OK to spank your kids??

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FeuerFrei

Diamond Member
Mar 30, 2005
9,144
929
126
Yes you should spank your kids. Not when your angry though. Do it as lovingly as possible. Let them know they earned it by disobeying you or whatever. You want the punishment to be unpleasant enough that the thought of it will make them behave.
 

CptObvious

Platinum Member
Mar 5, 2004
2,501
7
81
I think it's OK and I won't hesitate to spank my kid. I believe that corporal punishment is an effective way to keep a stubborn kid (like I was) in line, up to a certain age. By the time he reaches a certain age, you can resort to other tools like guilt and shame. j/k But if my 2-year old is screaming at me, I think a whack on the bottom is warranted to let him know who's the boss.
 

moshquerade

No Lifer
Nov 1, 2001
61,504
12
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Originally posted by: FireChicken
My wife was telling me about a family she read about in another forum where the dad spanks his 15 mo old kid. He spanks his kid really often and now the kid behaves when the father is around. The mother told the father that thier kid only behaves because he is afraid of the father. The father tells the mother that this is good and thats the way things shoud be.

When I heard this, it broke my heart. I have a daughter that is almost 15 months old and to think of her being afraid of me makes me want to cry.

Is this OK to have our children be alittle afraid of us?

Can we raise our children with love and respect and have them listen to us with out having to spank them and have them fear us hurting them?
while 15 mos is too young to whoop, i still feel that a tap on the hand or butt are appropriate means whereby to command attention and to discipline. not to be overdone, but only used when the situation really warrants it.

you can label it fear, but i think it promotes respect.
 

destrekor

Lifer
Nov 18, 2005
28,799
359
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i was spanked as a child and agree its a worthy punishment. damned society is treating even touching a child as if it is child abuse, regardless of the child's behavior, and its sickening. and thus parents are afraid to even lay a hand on their children, and it shows by watching the news and just looking around at how much these kids misbehave. parenting has gone down the sh!tter anymore.

on that note, I sort of, but sort of didn't fear the spanking and/or my parents. I didn't fear my parents, and it never prevented me from acting out, but once I knew I acted out and saw the response from my parents, I immediately ran to the dining room. There, a table sat in the middle and creating an oval around it. Well, I proceeded to run around it, staying opposite from whichever parent wanted to kill me at that time. it was amusing look back at it now, but I was mighty fearful then. Damn was I freaking out of my mind when I knew what was coming if(when) they finally caught me. lol
oh good times, good times.
and btw, I turned out a good child. both me and my sister. (of whom we both used to fight, her being 3 years older as well. however, we are extremely close and can confide in each other. sadly she lives 12 hours away, but my spring break will be there. excited. damn this has gone on long enough, damn digressions.)

on another note, I can tell who is going to be a bad parent in the future based on how they say they treat or don't treat pets. especially dogs. I have heard numerous girls say they refuse to do anything other than yell 'no' at their dog. Are you kidding? You don't gotta beat a dog, sure, but if the dog is misbehaving (especially once it has learned the proper behavior), a good, mild smack across its ass (unless, of course, it has bad hips) or across the nose is not harmful and gets the point across. if it fears that hit or simply learned what not to do, one cannot tell. but I know my past dog or my sisters dog never 'learned' to fear anyone in my family.
and that's how I know my sister will be a good parent (well at least will not let a kid turn into a devil child, good parenting or not who knows at the moment), and that girls who shy away from punishment likely will not be able to control their children. at least thats what I gather from their behavior.
 

Balt

Lifer
Mar 12, 2000
12,673
482
126
15 months old is kinda young for a spanking, I think.

In general I think parents should avoid it, but some kids are really rotten and won't learn without a little beating. :p
 

crt1530

Diamond Member
Apr 15, 2001
3,194
0
0
I believe that spanking has a has a place, but only in limited circumstances. It has been my observation that the vast majority of spanking/corporal punishment is doled out because the parents are inconsistent with discipline and do not properly teach their children how to behave. The only situation where you should spank or hit a child should be when you are not angry and it is needed to impart the severity of their transgression. That being said, when *I* was a kid, I feared the hour-plus long talking-to much more than any spanking I ever received.
 

soydios

Platinum Member
Mar 12, 2006
2,708
0
0
Spanking should only be used in very bad situations.

Over-used punishment does not make the punished stop the behavior, it makes them avoid the punisher.
 

Ricemarine

Lifer
Sep 10, 2004
10,507
0
0
Spanking is good for them until about pre-teens... Just don't spank them at the register at Super Target...

After that, won't do any good.
 

DaWhim

Lifer
Feb 3, 2003
12,985
1
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don't let those feminists get to you, boys and girls are innately different!!!!!! guys are ok to spank, do not ever spank a girl.
 

Lithium381

Lifer
May 12, 2001
12,452
2
0
i got spanked, but only on clear terms........i was given IMO fair guidelines....never out of anger was i given physical discipline....so i learned a clear destnction between cause and effect of my actions
 

Miramonti

Lifer
Aug 26, 2000
28,651
100
91
Originally posted by: Lithium381
i got spanked, but only on clear terms........i was given IMO fair guidelines....never out of anger was i given physical discipline....so i learned a clear destnction between cause and effect of my actions

:thumbsup:
 

Juno

Lifer
Jul 3, 2004
12,574
0
76
i got spanked when i was little. parents did it seriously sometimes that made me cry.

what i react to spanking, i believe it suffers unexpectedly. i would just give my kids lecture rather than spanking.
 

Dumac

Diamond Member
Dec 31, 2005
9,391
1
0
Originally posted by: DaWhim
don't let those feminists get to you, boys and girls are innately different!!!!!! guys are ok to spank, do not ever spank a girl.

Yeah! That's sexual abuse!

Spanking should be used with caution, as it can have long term consequences unseen at the time. I will try my best to avoid spanking my kids, but I can't gurantee it won't ever be necessary. It isn't a dire of a problem as some make it out to be though, nor as necessary as some seem to think.
 

FireChicken

Senior member
Jun 6, 2006
620
0
0
Originally posted by: krunchykrome
No, I don't think it is ok.


Me neither...I am actually really supprised that so many people spank thier kids.

I was spanked as a kid and worse. I have a discinct memory of getting spanked when I turned off the TV with too much force. This taught me that my dad valued our TV more than he valued me. When I got away from my parents in college I went totally wild and ended up getting addicted to many drugs. Luckly I over came that. But I do not want to risk me kid ever having to go through that. Spanking did nothing for me. More love and understanding would have been better for me.
 

skace

Lifer
Jan 23, 2001
14,488
7
81
Spanking shouldn't instill fear of the parent, it should instill fear of the action. If it is instilling fear of the parent, it is doing absolutely no good.
 

waggy

No Lifer
Dec 14, 2000
68,143
10
81
Originally posted by: FireChicken
Originally posted by: krunchykrome
No, I don't think it is ok.


Me neither...I am actually really supprised that so many people spank thier kids.

I was spanked as a kid and worse. I have a discinct memory of getting spanked when I turned off the TV with too much force. This taught me that my dad valued our TV more than he valued me. When I got away from my parents in college I went totally wild and ended up getting addicted to many drugs. Luckly I over came that. But I do not want to risk me kid ever having to go through that. Spanking did nothing for me. More love and understanding would have been better for me.

yeah spanking caused you to take drugs. uh huh.


 
Nov 29, 2006
15,692
4,204
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I think it is ok to spank. I was spanked on occasion growing up. Parents are their to be parents and teach you rights and wrongs, not to be your friend. Im against beating a child. that is going too far. In elementary school my principle could even paddle you if you were acting up. Those days are long gone in our new society of pansies :p
 

adairusmc

Diamond Member
Jul 24, 2006
7,095
78
91
Absolutely it is okay.

Not after age 10 though, thats when wall-to-wall therapy comes into play.
 

manowar821

Diamond Member
Mar 1, 2007
6,063
0
0
A little lesson. It's not the kids that are becoming pussies, it's the parents. They can't control their kids so they resort to fear.

Fear does not equal respect. You don't want them to fear you, you want them to respect you, and to understand why your rules are in place. If your kid only behaves when YOU'RE around that means you're doing something wrong, and that he's going to be a little ****** once you leave the house, or when he's out without you.

That being said, a spanking is perfectly acceptable if he/she does something very bad. Otherwise, just sit them down and talk it out. The talk should come whether or not you had to spank them, too...
 

Dacalo

Diamond Member
Mar 31, 2000
8,778
3
76
Originally posted by: FireChicken
Originally posted by: krunchykrome
No, I don't think it is ok.


Me neither...I am actually really supprised that so many people spank thier kids.

I was spanked as a kid and worse. I have a discinct memory of getting spanked when I turned off the TV with too much force. This taught me that my dad valued our TV more than he valued me. When I got away from my parents in college I went totally wild and ended up getting addicted to many drugs. Luckly I over came that. But I do not want to risk me kid ever having to go through that. Spanking did nothing for me. More love and understanding would have been better for me.

You are confusing two different things. Spanking and WHY you were spanked. Spanking in right situations will help, spanking in situations like your's will be detrimental.

Oh and don't blame your drug crap to spanking, that's ridiculous. I wasn't spanked but was diciplined with a stick to the calves and hand. My father never hit me, it was my mom who did, but she never hit me in anger.