Daughter mad I did not bail her out of jail

[Texashiker]

<serious thread>

My daughter, who lives with my exwife and is 18 years old got arrested for possession of K2.

Because I did not bail my daughter out of jail, they (two of my sons and daughter) accuse me of not loving them and not standing by them unconditionally.

I tried to teach my kids the world does not owe them anything. Nor do I owe them anything. Just because I am a parent does not mean I am going to bail you out or pay for your mistakes.

My two sons are 25 and 27 years old. They think they can blow their money and are living with my ex-wife.

I work, try to provide for my family, those who do not try throw sticks at me. I am just tired of it.

Ok, if you feel the need tell me how terrible of a parent I am.




Not posted in love and relationship because this is also about life in general. The difference between those who try and those who stand there with their hand out.

 

[Jeffg010]

Getting the popcorn ready for this....

 

[KeithTalent]

That's the second highest mountain on Earth!

KT

 

[amdhunter]

WTF is K2?

 

[Oil]

I love you, Texashiker. Not your threads tho

 

[Texashiker]

My third son is in the navy, serving on a nuclear submarine and is out on maneuvers right now.

He should not have to worry about his brothers and sisters getting in trouble while he is gone.

 

[NikolaeVarius]

WTF is K2?

Synthetic Cannabis

 

[TechBoyJK]

WTF is K2?

Synthetic marijuana

 

[highland145]

why are there no pics of 18 yo daughter?

 

[highland145]

not loving them and not standing by them unconditionally.

This has nothing to do with bailing her out.

 

[Texashiker]

WTF is K2?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Synthetic_cannabis

Stuff that kills kids.

http://www.cnn.com/2013/02/04/health/synthetic-marijuana-irpt/

Her family said the drug that landed the Cypress, Texas, teenager, then 16, in the ICU two weeks earlier wasn't bought from a dealer or offered to her at a party. It was a form of synthetic weed packaged as "potpourri" that she and friends bought at a gas station.

 

[SlowSpyder]

Who buys K2 anymore? It was only attractive because there was a time it was legal. Now that it is illegal why would anyone buy it over the real deal?

*edit - I should add, for a drug offense I would probably bail my kid out if I was able. But my stance is that the War on Drugs is wrong and should be abolished. If my kid did something to hurt someone purposely, steal, etc., then he can sit in jail and think on it. But that doesn't mean you don't love her or care, of course.

 

[Sinsear]

Good for you.

I woulda let my kid spend the night too

"I'll see you at arraignment"

 

[Gooberlx2]

I don't think that makes you a terrible parent. You know your family. It's a personal decision and probably one you didn't take lightly. My dad bailed out my brother recently, but he had the means to give my brother the loan and felt circumstances warranted it. My brother's attitude didn't really change much, so I dunno if my dad would make the same decision if he could do it over.

Honestly though, why would anyone use K2 when actual cannabis is so easily acquired?

 

[highland145]

Hope this ain't her cellie.

 

[Texashiker]

This has nothing to do with bailing her out.

I know that, you know that, they do not realize that.

I tried to teach my kids the value of a good work ethic, and to stay out of trouble with the law. If you have a criminal record, you are going to have problems finding a job. No job means no house, no car, no food,,,, or anything else.

 

[surfsatwerk]

Ok, if you feel the need tell me how terrible of a parent I am.

You're fine, your kids need to suffer the consequences of their actions to learn from their mistakes.

 

[jaedaliu]

I'm assuming it's synthetic pot, not an assault rifle she was caught with.

Your ex-wife is your ex-wife. Now that your daughter's 18, who cares what she thinks?

In a few years time, hopefully your daughter will understand that her father's love is unconditional, but access to your wallet isn't, and she learns to appreciate that.

 

[twinrider1]

You are not a bad parent. It's all about choices and consequences. They won't learn until they feel the consequences. Maybe she'll mature enough to realize a good relationship with their father is more important than getting high.
Stand your ground.

 

[Markbnj]

How long was she in? Overnight? I know young people who have been arrested for possession of real marijuana and were out a couple of hours later. Of course, this ain't Texas, yeehaw.

 

[manimal]

trying to teach kids consequences when they are 18 is way too late.


I would have bailed out my kids but the aftermath wouldntnt have been pretty. Maybe if people in the fucked up state of texas didnt overprosecute minor possesion of REAL MJ and decriminalize it then kids wouldnt be killing themselves with k2. Yes kids die on that shit.....



This was a fork in the road for you as a parent. I personally think you just alienated your kids and will die old and alone.

 

[mmntech]

I probably would have done the same thing in the OP's position. His kids are all legally adults anyway and have to start taking responsibility for their own mistakes. She'll hate you for it now, but hopefully will thank you later.

 

[BikeJunkie]

That's the second highest mountain on Earth!

KT

HAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

Good one :thumbsup:

 

[surfsatwerk]

This was a fork in the road for you as a parent. I personally think you just alienated your kids and will die old and alone.

Dealing with a child that may potentially have a drug problem can turn into a never ending mess. Better to have her life blow up in her face now than shield her and let the problem drag out.

 

[NikolaeVarius]

Oh man, if I had gotten arrested as a kid, I would have rather stayed in jail for a month or two than have to face my parents.