YAGT: Going after a girl with a bf? *UPDATE 4*

[Hyperblaze]

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: Hyperblaze

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: rhino56

Originally posted by: gigapet
Well....how does it feel to be the nice guy that doesn't get laid? Yeah wooohooo your respectable......you still didnt get laid.

This was a classic opportunity the girl set up *purposefully* to get laid. She coordinated the whole thing as a test for you to pass whether you were man enough for her to bone and leave her BF for. You failed the test miserably as I suspected you would....at least you understand that you failed the test. You'll kick yourself when your old and limp when you think about how you could have been the guy that was getting laid instead of the guy that gets to be the shoulder to cry on.

In any case I should be happy because ppl like are what makes it so easy for ppl like me to get laid.....all I have to do is not be a pvssy. :beer:

wow, you got some serious issues about women. did you know that a women is a person?

women like fvck assholes not pussy's. Thats why they have two types of men in there mind.....men that they fvck and men that they use for emotional support/advice/friendship

will someone who has a clue about women back me up here?

Thank you for generalizing so much :roll:

While I do agree that a lot of women don't want a wimp, it's not specially an asshole they are looking for. Although some (read carefully: some) women go for that.

They are looking for a man. Well, the mature ones anyways.

thats my point really. A man doesnt sit there and talk about puppy doggs and fairytales. A man is there to make her feel secure and to of course hit her off when necessary (im not refering to wife beating here). A pvssy on the other hand....doesnt make her feel secure because he talks about puppy doggs and fairytales and listens to her cry and never ever thinks about becoming sexual because he is 'respectful'. She resents him for this an throws him in the friend zone.

i think you are misunderstanding what "respectful" is. Respectful is not "not making a move". However, respectful IS "not making a move while she is in a relationship with someone already".

You can still respect a woman and still date her.

However, I will admit that some women expect the guy to treat her like sh!t
but do you really want a girl like that?

 

[slackerinabox]

I'll chime in that I know I'm in the friend zone, I'm kinda saddened by that... But I also let her know that I am attracted to her but that, since I respect her, I'm not acting on it. I'm using this time right now to reshape a few things in my life, including my physique... I'm a tubby bastard so I'm going to hold of making any major move, whether I make one on her or not, until after I make serious strides toward where I want to be... Maybe it's just delaying rejection, maybe I'll just be further cementing my friend status... I don't know and I really don't care... There are, as someone else said, millions of girls in this world. I think I'll make the best of this - learn to be a compassionate, caring person (I've been called a dick pretty often as I'm a bit cynical)... maybe this whole, frustrating situation can do me some good in the long run - with her or someone else.

I've had one too many one night stands anyway with girls I would never bother wasting time on again... I don't just want to screw this girl... I'm glad I didn't....

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

Originally posted by: Stark
that was nice of you. sucks to be stuck on the "friendship" ladder, but you have a good shot at being where she's coming for the rebound lovin'

:Q See? I can't believe I'm reading this from Stark. Stark's always been the upstanding Christian man that I've respected so much for so long. Then again, we haven't talked in a while so maybe things changed? Or maybe he's joking or something. I dunno. I need more coffee.

 

[gigapet]

Originally posted by: Nik

Originally posted by: DougK62

Originally posted by: Nik

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

UPDATE - 4/7/2005
(snip)

(snip)

respect plus fvcking plus

:thumbsup:

You must not know many quality people. I've never had a friend that wouldn't do exactly the same thing. There's a HUGE difference between getting with a woman that wants it, and taking advantage of someone when they're feeling like crap.

I don't. Almost everyone I know is like "dude she aint married so she's fair game" and "dude who cares if she's married, if she puts out you should nail it harrrr!!" :roll: I find it disheartening that men do not respect women anymore and vice versa. I find it atrocious that so few people actually respect another's committment to someone else, no matter how small or weak that committment is. She's taken? Leave her alone. Back off and don't get closer than friends. It's just... the gentlemanly thing to do and I hardly ever see it anymore. If all of your friends think this way and actually have the balls to practice what they preach when put in that situation (not that they'd get into it to begin with), then I'd say you're pretty lucky to have found people who's heads seem to be screwed on straight for a change. :thumbsup:

you live in a delusional world man. Both men and women have been promiscuous since the beginning of time. You can still be respectful and sexual. I am not sure why you think the two are mutually exclusive. We are not talking about pimp slapping ho's here. Girls like sex more than men and I for one dont feel guilty at all about giving them what they want. To each tehre own though. :beer:

 

[Hyperblaze]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
I'll chime in that I know I'm in the friend zone, I'm kinda saddened by that... But I also let her know that I am attracted to her but that, since I respect her, I'm not acting on it. I'm using this time right now to reshape a few things in my life, including my physique... I'm a tubby bastard so I'm going to hold of making any major move, whether I make one on her or not, until after I make serious strides toward where I want to be... Maybe it's just delaying rejection, maybe I'll just be further cementing my friend status... I don't know and I really don't care... There are, as someone else said, millions of girls in this world. I think I'll make the best of this - learn to be a compassionate, caring person (I've been called a dick pretty often as I'm a bit cynical)... maybe this whole, frustrating situation can do me some good in the long run - with her or someone else.

I've had one too many one night stands anyway with girls I would never bother wasting time on again... I don't just want to screw this girl... I'm glad I didn't....

you are attracted to her yes. and since you respect her, you aren't acting on it.

Now...if she breaks up with her boyfriend....will any of that change?

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: Hyperblaze

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
I'll chime in that I know I'm in the friend zone, I'm kinda saddened by that... But I also let her know that I am attracted to her but that, since I respect her, I'm not acting on it. I'm using this time right now to reshape a few things in my life, including my physique... I'm a tubby bastard so I'm going to hold of making any major move, whether I make one on her or not, until after I make serious strides toward where I want to be... Maybe it's just delaying rejection, maybe I'll just be further cementing my friend status... I don't know and I really don't care... There are, as someone else said, millions of girls in this world. I think I'll make the best of this - learn to be a compassionate, caring person (I've been called a dick pretty often as I'm a bit cynical)... maybe this whole, frustrating situation can do me some good in the long run - with her or someone else.

I've had one too many one night stands anyway with girls I would never bother wasting time on again... I don't just want to screw this girl... I'm glad I didn't....

you are attracted to her yes. and since you respect her, you aren't acting on it.

Now...if she breaks up with her boyfriend....will any of that change?

I'll be driving over going 80 with a dozen roses... I'm partially kidding.. Partially...

 

[Stark]

Originally posted by: Nik

Originally posted by: Stark
that was nice of you. sucks to be stuck on the "friendship" ladder, but you have a good shot at being where she's coming for the rebound lovin'

:Q See? I can't believe I'm reading this from Stark. Stark's always been the upstanding Christian man that I've respected so much for so long. Then again, we haven't talked in a while so maybe things changed? Or maybe he's joking or something. I dunno. I need more coffee.

I KEED, I KEED!!

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
I'll chime in that I know I'm in the friend zone, I'm kinda saddened by that... But I also let her know that I am attracted to her but that, since I respect her, I'm not acting on it. I'm using this time right now to reshape a few things in my life, including my physique... I'm a tubby bastard so I'm going to hold of making any major move, whether I make one on her or not, until after I make serious strides toward where I want to be... Maybe it's just delaying rejection, maybe I'll just be further cementing my friend status... I don't know and I really don't care... There are, as someone else said, millions of girls in this world. I think I'll make the best of this - learn to be a compassionate, caring person (I've been called a dick pretty often as I'm a bit cynical)... maybe this whole, frustrating situation can do me some good in the long run - with her or someone else.

I've had one too many one night stands anyway with girls I would never bother wasting time on again... I don't just want to screw this girl... I'm glad I didn't....

:thumbsup:

Who knows. Maybe later down the road when your friendship has further solidified and she's not taken, and emotionally stable, you two will end up together anyway. If not, you're not losing anything. You've gained a friend either way. However, respecting her no matter what outcome you may be "sacrificing" is always the best decision.

:beer:

 

[Leper Messiah]

lol. no poon for you. But really, you did the right thing. If you screwed her, she'd been resentful of it later...

 

[Hyperblaze]

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: Nik

Originally posted by: DougK62

Originally posted by: Nik

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

UPDATE - 4/7/2005
(snip)

(snip)

respect plus fvcking plus

:thumbsup:

You must not know many quality people. I've never had a friend that wouldn't do exactly the same thing. There's a HUGE difference between getting with a woman that wants it, and taking advantage of someone when they're feeling like crap.

I don't. Almost everyone I know is like "dude she aint married so she's fair game" and "dude who cares if she's married, if she puts out you should nail it harrrr!!" :roll: I find it disheartening that men do not respect women anymore and vice versa. I find it atrocious that so few people actually respect another's committment to someone else, no matter how small or weak that committment is. She's taken? Leave her alone. Back off and don't get closer than friends. It's just... the gentlemanly thing to do and I hardly ever see it anymore. If all of your friends think this way and actually have the balls to practice what they preach when put in that situation (not that they'd get into it to begin with), then I'd say you're pretty lucky to have found people who's heads seem to be screwed on straight for a change. :thumbsup:

you live in a delusional world man. Both men and women have been promiscuous since the beginning of time. You can still be respectful and sexual. I am not sure why you think the two are mutually exclusive. We are not talking about pimp slapping ho's here. Girls like sex more than men and I for one dont feel guilty at all about giving them what they want. To each tehre own though. :beer:

I agree with Nik on this one. Maybe you are just friends with skanks, I don't know. But I for one could not live with myself if I cause a girl to cheat on her boyfriend.

 

[Hyperblaze]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: Hyperblaze

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
I'll chime in that I know I'm in the friend zone, I'm kinda saddened by that... But I also let her know that I am attracted to her but that, since I respect her, I'm not acting on it. I'm using this time right now to reshape a few things in my life, including my physique... I'm a tubby bastard so I'm going to hold of making any major move, whether I make one on her or not, until after I make serious strides toward where I want to be... Maybe it's just delaying rejection, maybe I'll just be further cementing my friend status... I don't know and I really don't care... There are, as someone else said, millions of girls in this world. I think I'll make the best of this - learn to be a compassionate, caring person (I've been called a dick pretty often as I'm a bit cynical)... maybe this whole, frustrating situation can do me some good in the long run - with her or someone else.

I've had one too many one night stands anyway with girls I would never bother wasting time on again... I don't just want to screw this girl... I'm glad I didn't....

you are attracted to her yes. and since you respect her, you aren't acting on it.

Now...if she breaks up with her boyfriend....will any of that change?

I'll be driving over going 80 with a dozen roses... I'm partially kidding.. Partially...

If you don't make a move when she's single....I'll stop calling you respectful and just call you a wuss

 

[gigapet]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
I'll chime in that I know I'm in the friend zone, I'm kinda saddened by that... But I also let her know that I am attracted to her but that, since I respect her, I'm not acting on it. I'm using this time right now to reshape a few things in my life, including my physique... I'm a tubby bastard so I'm going to hold of making any major move, whether I make one on her or not, until after I make serious strides toward where I want to be... Maybe it's just delaying rejection, maybe I'll just be further cementing my friend status... I don't know and I really don't care... There are, as someone else said, millions of girls in this world. I think I'll make the best of this - learn to be a compassionate, caring person (I've been called a dick pretty often as I'm a bit cynical)... maybe this whole, frustrating situation can do me some good in the long run - with her or someone else.

I've had one too many one night stands anyway with girls I would never bother wasting time on again... I don't just want to screw this girl... I'm glad I didn't....

in the future girls hate to be told(telling = wussy behavior) you are attracted to them.....they want you to show(showing = manly behavior) them.

My best advice to you is to get over your oneitis and go find some other wonderful women to show how great a man you are.

 

[Stark]

Originally posted by: Stark

Originally posted by: Nik

that was nice of you. sucks to be stuck on the "friendship" ladder, but you have a good shot at being where she's coming for the rebound lovin'

:Q See? I can't believe I'm reading this from Stark. Stark's always been the upstanding Christian man that I've respected so much for so long. Then again, we haven't talked in a while so maybe things changed? Or maybe he's joking or something. I dunno. I need more coffee.

I KEED, I KEED!!

of course, i was the ultimate "nice guy" back in college, and it is sometimes where girls look for some post relationship attention, so there is some truth in what i wrote. I'm just saying he may not have completely blown his chances by being a nice guy to her.

 

[broon]

I'm finding Nik's advice to be dead on. Women who want the jerk are emotionally unstable. If a guy is going to sleep with a girl, a real man would be doing it because there is some kind of commitment already there. I'm impressed with how the OP handled the situation. Much more respectful for being in the "friend" category instead of the "he took advantage of me" category.

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

Originally posted by: gigapet
you live in a delusional world man. Both men and women have been promiscuous since the beginning of time. You can still be respectful and sexual. I am not sure why you think the two are mutually exclusive. We are not talking about pimp slapping ho's here. Girls like sex more than men and I for one dont feel guilty at all about giving them what they want. To each tehre own though. :beer:

So because I expect people to respect each other and each other's significant others, I'm dilusional? :roll: Hardly. Giving in to promiscuity (spelling?) simply because others are doing it doesn't make it any less dispicable. I'm not the most innocent when it comes to sexual partners, but I've never disrespected a significant other by sleeping with someone else or whatever. I've been in a stupid situation once, but nothing happened. I still hold it against myself that I was stupid enough to be IN that situation, and I haven't yet apologized to the guy, which I feel I need to for some reason , but that's a whole nother story. I guess you're right though. To each his own. Some people choose to live a life with higher, better standards and some don't.

 

[slackerinabox]

As much as I appreciate the "props" you guys are giving me, I'm still feeling a bit down that the night didn't turn into a late night cinemax movie. I need to get drunk after work, I'll feel much better after that

 

[spanky]

good job.... i think the ATOT community to chip in and get u a lapdance.

 

[Stark]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
As much as I appreciate the "props" you guys are giving me, I'm still feeling a bit down that the night didn't turn into a late night cinemax movie. I need to get drunk after work, I'll feel much better after that

well, at least she knows she has options. some girls can't end one relationship without knowing something else is out there. If your goal is to get her away from her "bad" boyfriend, you may have helped her out.

Back in my pre-married days i never got together with a girl who had a bf, however one girl broke up with her loser bf's because of me. Truth be told, i would have been better off if she would have stayed with the loser!

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
As much as I appreciate the "props" you guys are giving me, I'm still feeling a bit down that the night didn't turn into a late night cinemax movie. I need to get drunk after work, I'll feel much better after that

Why do you feel poorly regarding the outcome? Do you take pride in the fact that you resisted the temptation to try taking advantage of an obviously unstable situation? What would you have gained by doing so? Orgasm? Big deal. The satisfaction of knowing that you've physically interacted with a female? Give her a hug. Do you feel pressured by your male peers to have sex as much as possible because it somehow makes you a better man? Do you THINK you'll be happier if you'd have had sex with her? Are you just looking for emotional fulfillment and can't seem to find any other way to gratify it outside of sexual interaction?

The more you think about it (sober, mind you), the better you'll feel about it. Your brain knows that you did the right thing. You knew that before it happened and chose to make the right decision before it happened. Often times you'll find that your brain and your heart disagree on some things and that sometimes your brain needs to convince your heart that you'll be better off having done the right thing instead of the human thing.

Enjoy your :beer: but, like I said, just give it some thought.

 

[Tiorapatea]

Originally posted by: C42

Originally posted by: Tiorapatea

Also, I cannot believe how many rednecks there are in here who claim that it is justifiable to resort to violence if a man runs off with his gf. Honestly, it is the right of anyone's gf to be with whomsoever she wants to be with. This applies also in marriage - you would have a right to be upset if a man takes your wife *in some circumstances* but violence is not acceptable as a way to resolve disputes or avenge wrongdoing.

Redneck? Hmm... don't think so, but I do live in a rural area, maybe it has finally rubbed off.

Well there is a saying that nothing in life is free, and the price for taking my girlfriend is your blood being spilled.

Too many people now a days think violence is so wrong! Oh noes mommy the newage people are here with their we can solve everything by talking! You people are the type that go to the leg press at the gym and are afraid of the squat rack. You are also the type that runs and hides behind us in a barfight.

No wonder the prisons are full I guess you're right though - maybe if I beefed up a little, I'd be hungry to do a little time.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: spanky
good job.... i think the ATOT community to chip in and get u a lapdance.

Hell, I wouldn't turn that down... I had a rough as hell night and had less than an hour of sleep - there has to be some sorta light at the end of the tunnel!

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: Nik

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212
As much as I appreciate the "props" you guys are giving me, I'm still feeling a bit down that the night didn't turn into a late night cinemax movie. I need to get drunk after work, I'll feel much better after that

Why do you feel poorly regarding the outcome? Do you take pride in the fact that you resisted the temptation to try taking advantage of an obviously unstable situation? What would you have gained by doing so? Orgasm? Big deal. The satisfaction of knowing that you've physically interacted with a female? Give her a hug. Do you feel pressured by your male peers to have sex as much as possible because it somehow makes you a better man? Do you THINK you'll be happier if you'd have had sex with her? Are you just looking for emotional fulfillment and can't seem to find any other way to gratify it outside of sexual interaction?

The more you think about it (sober, mind you), the better you'll feel about it. Your brain knows that you did the right thing. You knew that before it happened and chose to make the right decision before it happened. Often times you'll find that your brain and your heart disagree on some things and that sometimes your brain needs to convince your heart that you'll be better off having done the right thing instead of the human thing.

Enjoy your :beer: but, like I said, just give it some thought.

Well, she's really cute. But I'm kidding.. I don't regret my actions, though if my actions were the same and the results were slightly different.. iwouldn't complain

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

That's her? Cute++

 

[Leper Messiah]

hell. I'd hit that too, if I could...

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: Nik
That's her? Cute++

She's much prettier in person..She's freaking beautiful actually... See how HARD me being the good guy was???