What is the manliest thing you have ever done?

[alkemyst]

what the fuck are you quoting

I am confused too, I don't know who I threaten anonymously.

 

[iroast]

I saved two dumb bitches from drowning 4 miles off the Florida shore when I was 17. They somehow thought a 13ft rental with a 6HP engine would be fine beyond the reef on a day when a tropical depression was approaching. I was out in my boat looking for grouper and mutton snapper and saw them waving and screaming. My neighborhood friend and I motored over to help, and that's when I discovered dude could hardly swim. I swim over, help them bail out the boat, and while I'm telling them to stop complaining about wet cigarettes and cel phones a big wave slammed their boat on top of me. Swam back to my boat feeling dizzy and out of breath, climbed in, threw them a line, and towed them about 2 miles until SeaTow showed up. Those bitches never even said thank you.

Folks were out of town and I was already kinda on probation with them, so I wrapped a cold towel around my neck and took it easy for the rest of the weekend. Monday came around and I knew I had to go to the hospital. After xrays were taken, Doc said I had a compression fracture in one of my vertebrae and that I was lucky I hadn't been paralyzed and then drown.


My sister thinks I'm superman because I chased a black bear away from her house with fruit from her kitchen table. Didn't have a gun with me so I figured some Granny Smiths and naval oranges doing about 70 might do the trick. She hasn't seen a bear since.


Not sure if this rates as manly or just stupid, but I saw my step-dad get fed up with a cyst on his left pec (almost a boil, poor guy had a hard time with cystic acne when he was a kid, still kinda haunts him) so he grabbed a Ruger Single Six in .22LR and basically used a bullet to lance it. He put two Bandaids over it and went back to work.

Trust me...they are thankful. They were probably in shock at the time, or something.

 

[ichy]

This probably counts as retarded rather than manly, but I went bowling right after fracturing my shoulder once and used beer to dull the pain.

 

[ichy]

Came home from school one day when I was 15 and my dad was beating on my mom again like usual. I finally got tired of it later that night and kneed him in the groin, grabbed him by the throat, slammed him against the wall, and punched him in the face repeatedly until he was knocked out. I checked that he was still breathing (I didn't want to kill the man, just teach him a lesson), and then dragged his body outside and locked the door.

Neither my mom nor my sisters said a word and we just went on with our evening, not wanting to address the white elephant in the room. When I woke up for school the next morning he was sitting in a chair right outside the garage smoking a cigarette with blood crusted down his face and a swollen nose and black eyes. He told me and my sisters to have a good day at school.

Since then he's never touched her like that again, and he still has a slightly crooked nose.

Awesome story. Guys who beat on their wives are scum, and I'm glad to hear that a taste of his own medicine taught your dad a lesson. Silly people who say that violence never solves anything.

 

[ichy]

And, by 10 years of age, they both knew that you don't take cheap shots with a bottle (or anything else) during a fight. That's something that a pansy/loser would do.

I'm not sure I agree with this. As Heinlein put it, the intelligent man fights only when he has to, never for sport. If you're in a situation where you have to fight then you do what you have to to win. Never fight fair!

 

[Braznor]

A lot of dirty political work.

I had my fair share of fiistfights, knife wounds and broken wounds by breaking up meetings and street processions of rival political parties.

One time twelve of us went and heckled a commie with too many questions, the meeting ended up in fighting throughout until the police came to interrupt and we scampered away from scaling a high wall.

 

[mattpegher]

Another one,

Split open the chest of a woman after an MVA and did open heart massage.

 

[ichy]

Another one,

Split open the chest of a woman after an MVA and did open heart massage.

I hope you're joking.

 

[SP33Demon]

Came home from school one day when I was 15 and my dad was beating on my mom again like usual. I finally got tired of it later that night and kneed him in the groin, grabbed him by the throat, slammed him against the wall, and punched him in the face repeatedly until he was knocked out. I checked that he was still breathing (I didn't want to kill the man, just teach him a lesson), and then dragged his body outside and locked the door.

Neither my mom nor my sisters said a word and we just went on with our evening, not wanting to address the white elephant in the room. When I woke up for school the next morning he was sitting in a chair right outside the garage smoking a cigarette with blood crusted down his face and a swollen nose and black eyes. He told me and my sisters to have a good day at school.

Since then he's never touched her like that again, and he still has a slightly crooked nose.

Yep, I did the same thing. Stepdad was drunk and raised his hand at my mom. Sent him flying across the room so hard he was lateral to the ground and smashed 2 lamps when he landed (and broke the computer). When sober, he was pissed at me but never raised a hand to her since.

Hmm, let's see, since this is a brag thread. Stabbed a kid in the eye with a sharp stick when I was 5 y/o in self defense (he and 10 of his friends cornered me in an alley). Destroyed the class bully in a locker room who felt the need to pick on my best friend in 5th grade. Punched out a kid out for flicking cigarette ashes on me in my car while making Asian slurs. Benched almost double my weight (335 lbs, weighed 175). Lived without electricity and warm water (freezing cold showers) for 6 months in the winter.

 

[alkemyst]

Somehow I think stabbing another 5yo in the eye even if there was 10 of them went into the realm of insanity.

I also think it's funny those using the 'being a father' line. That is usually something added on to a story "yeah after single handedly saving those 5 people from a frenzy of great white sharks and only losing two limbs; being a father is still the most manly thing I have done"

I am really not buying young teenagers taking on their fathers unless the guy was a 120lb stringbean,

 

[zinfamous]

I am really not buying young teenagers taking on their fathers unless the guy was a 120lb stringbean,

fucksticks that beat on their women are pussies, and I'm assuming would fold quickly if someone directly challenged them.

Also, catching someone by surprise is a huge advantage.

 

[SP33Demon]

Somehow I think stabbing another 5yo in the eye even if there was 10 of them went into the realm of insanity.

I also think it's funny those using the 'being a father' line. That is usually something added on to a story "yeah after single handedly saving those 5 people from a frenzy of great white sharks and only losing two limbs; being a father is still the most manly thing I have done"

I am really not buying young teenagers taking on their fathers unless the guy was a 120lb stringbean,

Yeah, the kids did think I was insane since I took their bully leader out. Luckily he was ok but I was in flight or fight mode since they had kicked my ass a couple times. 10 kids will lose their will to pick on you after seeing their leader writhe in pain on the ground. Kid came to school with a huge bandage over his eye and we actually became acquaintances after that. Of course my dad gave me the belt when he found out what happened.

Nah, stepdad wasn't 120 lbs... more like 165ish. But I was in college (home for the summer) and that was in my powerlifting days so I was 175-180 pure solid muscle benching 335 and had a bit of an anger problem. Hulk smash, especially if someone threatened to physically hurt my mom (who is petit). We never talked about it again after that day and made up, he got the point not to treat my mom like that.

 

[LookBehindYou]

Yep, I did the same thing. Stepdad was drunk and raised his hand at my mom. Sent him flying across the room so hard he was lateral to the ground and smashed 2 lamps when he landed (and broke the computer). When sober, he was pissed at me but never raised a hand to her since.

Hmm, let's see, since this is a brag thread. Stabbed a kid in the eye with a sharp stick when I was 5 y/o in self defense (he and 10 of his friends cornered me in an alley). Destroyed the class bully in a locker room who felt the need to pick on my best friend in 5th grade. Punched out a kid out for flicking cigarette ashes on me in my car while making Asian slurs. Benched almost double my weight (335 lbs, weighed 175). Lived without electricity and warm water (freezing cold showers) for 6 months in the winter.

WTF is a 5 year old doing in an alley? Hookers and Blow?

I call shens on that one.

 

[SP33Demon]

WTF is a 5 year old doing in an alley? Hookers and Blow?

I call shens on that one.

Lol. Actually I used a tree branch that was by a dumpster. Jumped a fence, stuck the sharp broken branch through a chainlink and threatened to stab anyone that came near the fence. Leader of the pack walked within striking distance and dared me to do it. Walked close to the point of the stick, and bam. I wasn't getting my ass beat by them again. Of course when you're 5 y/o you don't know any better. But I still remember it like it happened yesterday. That and the whipping I got by dad when his parents called mine.

 

[iLEktron]

Worked about 12 hours on a black shingled roof during 104 F degree day. Had blisters on my feet that day from the heat of the roof. But i kept walk'n.
Also carried not 1 but 2 bundles of shingles up a 2 story ladder

Man when i read this I felt bad for this guy, seriouslyy. im 18 and I started working on the roofs when I was 15. when we do a 40sqr house I have to bring about 2 pallets of bundles. about 60-80 bundles. Just an example and ur crying over 2 bundles. Nd plz don't even start about the weather on the roof its always 110-120... Or else try going without food for 2 days, back when i was in poland...
u guys have it easy.

Well I enjoed the thread, cool stories. keep em coming.

 

[MetalMat]

Knocked out this drunk asshole that was bothering a chick then had sex with her

 

[gothamhunter]

I am really not buying young teenagers taking on their fathers unless the guy was a 120lb stringbean,

My dad was a pretty tough guy and had very powerful arms; he used to wrestle and went on to do championship arm-wrestling. However, he also had a beer gut the size of a tractor wheel and probably weighed around 230 at the time.

I was in high school and did wrestling, football, track, and lifted weights all the time.

Like I said, I wasn't shy about wanting to just beat his ass so I started it off with a nice groin kick - that made it easy to slam him into the wall and beat him to a pulp. That, and as zinfamous said, he was caught off-guard, and my adrenaline and hatred was pumping.

On a separate one: I recently had probably the worst shits in the history of the world ever at work one day. It was like an explosion of feces, and it just felt so amazing I couldn't believe it so I made as much noise as possible without alerting anyone outside the bathroom. Little did I realize that in the rush to get to the bathroom, I forgot that I still had my work headset on, and a vendor had me on mute. And by mute, I mean he muted my ability to hear him, and not the other way around. I didn't hear a peep at all while I washed my hands and walked back to my desk, and I saw on the phone that he was indeed still on the line. So, I guess as jokingly as I could, I said "Man do I feel better! So have we gotten any closer to resolving this issue?" The other guy laughed his ass off and said he needed a moment and would get back to me.

 

[mattpegher]

I hope you're joking.

No thats my job. and did it in the ER not in the field.
<---- Trauma certified Emergency physician

 

[alkemyst]

My dad was a pretty tough guy and had very powerful arms; he used to wrestle and went on to do championship arm-wrestling. However, he also had a beer gut the size of a tractor wheel and probably weighed around 230 at the time.

I was in high school and did wrestling, football, track, and lifted weights all the time.

Like I said, I wasn't shy about wanting to just beat his ass so I started it off with a nice groin kick - that made it easy to slam him into the wall and beat him to a pulp. That, and as zinfamous said, he was caught off-guard, and my adrenaline and hatred was

At 15 that would have been around 1 year of all that...sounds like you think you are batman.

 

[gothamhunter]

At 15 that would have been around 1 year of all that...sounds like you think you are batman.

And you sound like you think you know everyone's life.

I only explained my dad because you automatically assumed he was a stick figure pussy - he wasn't.

I was in wrestling in gradeschool, wrestling, track, and football in junior high, and I started high school when I was 14, so it was over a year.

Do I think I'm Batman? No. Was I a beefed up 15 year old who hated my dad? Yea.

Anything else Mr. Know-it-all?

 

[dainthomas]

I broke my hand skiing then helped some friends unload a steel truck in 5 below zero weather.

 

[Red Squirrel]

I tested if an electrical line was live using my bare hands. Only little girls use non contact testers!

 

[mattpegher]

You want manly, I had an old guy pass a 1.2cm diameter kidney stone without pain medicine, cause "I dont like that stuff". It had bumps and spikes on it. He had spent the night sweating profusely while in pain and came in to the ER in the morning after the pain had subsided enough that he could drive.

 

[PlasmaBomb]

Here is an example of someone who may look tough, but actually acts like a little girl.
Are you like this or are you manly? Prove it! Post the manliest thing you have ever done.

Watch the next one - Gangster hit by icecream truck while dancing...

lol

 

[LookBehindYou]

Watch the next one - Gangster hit by icecream truck while dancing...

lol

Awesome!!! I love that. I can't stand when people walk (or dance) in the road like that expecting drivers to slow down and wait. Shit pisses me off, I work downtown and see it all the time.