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Was this bad form?

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Accipiter22

Banned
so i started this new job last Monday, and I met a girl the first day there, it's her first day too. She's very pretty, and seems laid back. We don't work in close proximity, so I figured I'd get her number, and we made plans to hang out at some point. During the week I called her about a movie, but that was a no go (she didn't call back till after the movie). Then on Friday we DID go to a club together with some of my other friends. They gave her a big thumbs up, everyone likes her. At the club she didn't really dance with us, I don't think she was quite comfortable...and a bizarre guy kept talking to her. SO anyway, on Sunday there was this festival thing I had talked to her about going to, several days prior. I called her earlier in the day, got no answer, called her later before I left, no answer again.

Was it bad form to: A) Call so soon after hanging out on friday, and B) call twice in one day?

Anyhoo, I'm thinking of inviting her to my family's beach place this weekend..

I've seen her at work, and she's still nice to me, she seemed more enthusiastic last week towards me than this week....of course I haven't really seen her a ton these past 2 days so I haven't had a chance to talk to her much. Left her a voicemail tonight.....
 
Sounds like she's not interested or she's playing games. You should probably leave it alone for a while and see what she does, if anything.
 
Originally posted by: joshsquall
Sounds like she's not interested or she's playing games. You should probably leave it alone for a while and see what she does, if anything.
Click to expand...
*agrees*

you sound like you are suffocating her waaaaaaay too soon. if she is interested in you she'll let you know.

 
Originally posted by: joshsquall
Sounds like she's not interested or she's playing games. You should probably leave it alone for a while and see what she does, if anything.
Click to expand...

yah, something else I noted, she told someone else at work she'd go with them to a movie (another of the girls), then she went and saw it with her brother instead and never told the girl.

Don't get me wrong, this girl is very very nice, but my plan is to let it sit for a few days minimum, see what's up come the weekend.
 
Originally posted by: moshquerade
Originally posted by: joshsquall
Sounds like she's not interested or she's playing games. You should probably leave it alone for a while and see what she does, if anything.
Click to expand...
*agrees*

you sound like you are suffocating her waaaaaaay too soon. if she is interested in you she'll let you know.
Click to expand...


*puts down ether rag...casually kicks it under chair*
 
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
Originally posted by: moshquerade
Originally posted by: joshsquall
Sounds like she's not interested or she's playing games. You should probably leave it alone for a while and see what she does, if anything.
Click to expand...
*agrees*

you sound like you are suffocating her waaaaaaay too soon. if she is interested in you she'll let you know.
Click to expand...


*puts down ether rag...casually kicks it under chair*
Click to expand...
you have a great sense of humor 😉

 
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
Originally posted by: joshsquall
Sounds like she's not interested or she's playing games. You should probably leave it alone for a while and see what she does, if anything.
Click to expand...

yah, something else I noted, she told someone else at work she'd go with them to a movie (another of the girls), then she went and saw it with her brother instead and never told the girl.

Don't get me wrong, this girl is very very nice, but my plan is to let it sit for a few days minimum, see what's up come the weekend.
Click to expand...

I wouldn't call her again, weekend or not. If she's not interested, she won't care. If she is, she'll call you.
 
The idea of inviting her to the beach place seems too soon.. give it some time and just see if she wants to take a lunch break with you or something simple like that.
 
hmm thanks for the suggestions.....my fatal flaw with girls is DEFINETLY that I smother them. Here's how my logic goes:

'well I had a great time with that girl. I'll call her in a couple days to see if she wants to do something again. Since we had a great time, she should want to see me again right away". Literally, that's how I think. everytime. without any deviation from that mindset.
 
Personally, I think that dating co-workers is a bad idea. Remember: If you two end up having a nasty breakup, you're still going to need to work with her EVERY WEEKDAY. It's like taking a dump where you eat, man... don't do it.

And, YES, calling her twice in one day was overkill.
 
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
'well I had a great time with that girl. I'll call her in a couple days to see if she wants to do something again. Since we had a great time, she should want to see me again right away". Literally, that's how I think. everytime. without any deviation from that mindset.
Click to expand...

Learn from the games women love to play... play "hard to get." And stop smothering them. Sure-fire way for her to lose interest

Also, is this a classic college summer job setting? If so, forget all the "don't date a co-worker" warnings. As long as you're not a creep/sexual deviant just ASKING for harassment charges, it really doesn't apply. 😛 Nothing wrong with a little summer lovin between you and a consenting co-worker that you'll probably never see again when the summer is over. 😛
 
Originally posted by: AbAbber2k
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
'well I had a great time with that girl. I'll call her in a couple days to see if she wants to do something again. Since we had a great time, she should want to see me again right away". Literally, that's how I think. everytime. without any deviation from that mindset.
Click to expand...

Learn from the games women love to play... play "hard to get." And stop smothering them. Sure-fire way for her to lose interest

Also, is this a classic college summer job setting? If so, forget all the "don't date a co-worker" warnings. As long as you're not a creep/sexual deviant just ASKING for harassment charges, it really doesn't apply. 😛 Nothing wrong with a little summer lovin between you and a consenting co-worker that you'll probably never see again when the summer is over. 😛
Click to expand...



yup, she's there for the summer. I'm doing contract type stuff there, so it's not forever. She's home for summer from college.
 
leave her alone for awhile. get that carrot on the string again and dangle it in front of her so to speak.

i hope you didn't spend too much money on her already? any kino(touching)?
 
Originally posted by: Pepsei
leave her alone for awhile. get that carrot on the string again and dangle it in front of her so to speak.

i hope you didn't spend too much money on her already? any kino(touching)?
Click to expand...

haven't spent a dime, maybe like 5 bucks for a cover at the club, other than that 0. She actually bought me and my friends a drink.


A little bit of touching. We kissed a few times friday night after the club, but we were a bit tipsy, and nothing got groped.
 
Damn man, you're suffocating the woman. If she had any interest before she probably doesn't now, imo.

I don't think I've ever called anyone twice in the same day if they don't call me back. Don't do it.
 
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
hmm thanks for the suggestions.....my fatal flaw with girls is DEFINETLY that I smother them. Here's how my logic goes:

'well I had a great time with that girl. I'll call her in a couple days to see if she wants to do something again. Since we had a great time, she should want to see me again right away". Literally, that's how I think. everytime. without any deviation from that mindset.
Click to expand...

I tend to think the same way too, but with women you never really know. Sometimes if you really hit it and call or ask for another date right away they don't want anything to do with you even though they really liked you. Other times if you don't call right away your the a-hole who didn't call for 3 days after a wonderful date.

The one thing I am sure about is that I know absolutely nothing about women.

Personally I wouldn't invite her to the beach house unless a group of friends both you and her know will be there. That way if things don't work out for either one of you it wont be all creepy. Or if the beach house is within driving distance let her know that you and some buddies are going to be hanging out there this weekend and if she wants to come by with some friends it will be fun.
 
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
Originally posted by: Pepsei
leave her alone for awhile. get that carrot on the string again and dangle it in front of her so to speak.

i hope you didn't spend too much money on her already? any kino(touching)?
Click to expand...

haven't spent a dime, maybe like 5 bucks for a cover at the club, other than that 0. She actually bought me and my friends a drink.


A little bit of touching. We kissed a few times friday night after the club, but we were a bit tipsy, and nothing got groped.
Click to expand...

She kissed you and you guys don't even know each other yet? She's playing you, dude. And it's bad form for you to attempt to date someone you work with.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
Originally posted by: Pepsei
leave her alone for awhile. get that carrot on the string again and dangle it in front of her so to speak.

i hope you didn't spend too much money on her already? any kino(touching)?
Click to expand...

haven't spent a dime, maybe like 5 bucks for a cover at the club, other than that 0. She actually bought me and my friends a drink.


A little bit of touching. We kissed a few times friday night after the club, but we were a bit tipsy, and nothing got groped.
Click to expand...

She kissed you and you guys don't even know each other yet? She's playing you, dude. And it's bad form for you to attempt to date someone you work with.
Click to expand...

Usually, but it's just a summer fling at a summer job... eh I say take it slower but don't give up just yet. What do you have to lose?
 
Originally posted by: supafly
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
Originally posted by: Pepsei
leave her alone for awhile. get that carrot on the string again and dangle it in front of her so to speak.

i hope you didn't spend too much money on her already? any kino(touching)?
Click to expand...

haven't spent a dime, maybe like 5 bucks for a cover at the club, other than that 0. She actually bought me and my friends a drink.


A little bit of touching. We kissed a few times friday night after the club, but we were a bit tipsy, and nothing got groped.
Click to expand...

She kissed you and you guys don't even know each other yet? She's playing you, dude. And it's bad form for you to attempt to date someone you work with.
Click to expand...

Usually, but it's just a summer fling at a summer job... eh I say take it slower but don't give up just yet. What do you have to lose?
Click to expand...



well yeah, she seems like she'd be fun to hang out with either way, so my plan now is to ignore her for a while, and hope she hasn't lost interest
 
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
hmm thanks for the suggestions.....my fatal flaw with girls is DEFINETLY that I smother them. Here's how my logic goes:

'well I had a great time with that girl. I'll call her in a couple days to see if she wants to do something again. Since we had a great time, she should want to see me again right away". Literally, that's how I think. everytime. without any deviation from that mindset.
Click to expand...

I used to be guilty of this. I met a girl and was talking to her casually...and I was interested. A week or so after I met her, I left a note on her car with a rose. i thought it was a nice romantic gesture, but I was told by a mutual friend that it seemed kinda stalker-ish. 😕 I was just trying to be nice.
 
Lay low, play it cool. Don't call her anymore. I would just give her some space now. Sounds like she likes you but maybe is not ready to get so close to you yet. Don't jump the gun.
 
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