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Things not to say to a single mother...

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I don't know what kind of farewell parties your companies hold but the many I've been to I wouldn't have a problem if they brought children. I also have high expectations of how the children will react because of how mine act.

My view is this (coming from one who plans many going away dinners): If you ask a single parent, expect a child to come along. If you want to have the event be adults only, advertise that. Don't expect anyone to put the company above the kids after hours. Escpecially a single mom.

I do agree that parents that let their kids run ramant through dinners etc are a joke and are doing the kids and patrons a great injustice. I have no problem going up to couples to let them know that there is a strange man walking around looking at all the kids and they might want to keep track of their own. Then as they see my family sitting calmly at dinner... They get the picture or they are scared of this ficticious character I told them about and round their kids up. Either way, results are achieved.
 
I think the bottom line is this. I wasn't trying to be mean, it was a slip.

Aside from that? It's like taking a two year old to the movies...if they are going to scream and make noise don't bring them.

It was common knowledge that we are not going to a family establishment.
 
Originally posted by: Gulzakar
I know kids pick up langiages fast. But I remember reading that if you speak dual languages to them at a you age, it confuses them...

It just seems the teaching her Spanish first is going to Handi-Cap her in the early years of her life.

but I could be wrong.
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You are wrong. The learning two languages thing is a myth!

My own expiriance
My kids started with sign language, followed by English and now German added.
They spoke faster and earlier then any other kid in their age in their playgroup.
 
Originally posted by: Nitemare
Originally posted by: Astaroth33
So what happened after that?
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Hopefully she left the little monster at home...They don't call it the terrible two's for nothing
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I had a mom once tell me it was the "Terrific Twos". As a father of 4, this lady didn't have a clue. And it doesn't stop there, it goes from terrible twos to terrible, but sometimes funny, threes, then fun 4s, to frightful 5s, to shut-up sixes to shoot me know sevens...
 
Originally posted by: Gulzakar
I think the bottom line is this. I wasn't trying to be mean, it was a slip.

Aside from that? It's like taking a two year old to the movies...if they are going to scream and make noise don't bring them.

It was common knowledge that we are not going to a family establishment.
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you were rude, man. that's the bottom line.

i'm going to assume that you don't have kids. you'd probably be pretty pissed if someone referred to your kids as "things". hell, imagine if you had a girlfriend who was going out with her friends. your gf announces that she'll bring you along, and they respond, "you're bringing that thing?"

like i said, i wholeheartedly agree that kids may not belong at this party. however, when you demean someone's children by calling them "things", you're being quite tactless. edit: i'm sure that you felt bad for saying what you did (at least i hope so), but i just feel that someone should mention this, since no one seems to think it's a big deal.

and here's some evidence that raising kids to be bilingual may be advantageous:
link

link
 
Originally posted by: Gulzakar
I know kids pick up langiages fast. But I remember reading that if you speak dual languages to them at a you age, it confuses them...

It just seems the teaching her Spanish first is going to Handi-Cap her in the early years of her life.

but I could be wrong.
Click to expand...

Not true, I'd have to say...my good friend in high school was fluent in Mandarin Chinese, Spanish, and English, speaking them all from a pretty young age.

 
She's a single working mother. You fault her for not placing her daughter after her workplace during her free hours? She doesn't get very much time to spend with her kid as it is. Should she bring her when there is booze? Probably not. But as a working woman, maybe she doesn't think it's in her best interest to turn down office "socializing" for fear of the repercussions on her career.
 
Originally posted by: Bryophyte
She's a single working mother. You fault her for not placing her daughter after her workplace during her free hours? She doesn't get very much time to spend with her kid as it is. Should she bring her when there is booze? Probably not. But as a working woman, maybe she doesn't think it's in her best interest to turn down office "socializing" for fear of the repercussions on her career.
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Why not just bring the kid to work everyday for quality bonding time?

j/k

But I would believe that her boss should understand her not being able to find a babysitter
 
Originally posted by: Bryophyte
She's a single working mother. You fault her for not placing her daughter after her workplace during her free hours? She doesn't get very much time to spend with her kid as it is. Should she bring her when there is booze? Probably not. But as a working woman, maybe she doesn't think it's in her best interest to turn down office "socializing" for fear of the repercussions on her career.
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I guess you're just playing devil's advocate, since I can't understand how someone could actually take her position... but the OP did say that the woman's mother typically looks after the kid, why couldn't she that night?

I think this attitude about kids is very detrimental to our society. People seem to think having a child or children entitles them to ridiculous privelages, such as having everything on earth G-rated, being able to disrupt an entire public area by not even trying to hush the little bastards when they're making more noise than a jet engine at takeoff, etc... If someone chooses to have children, they're choosing to raise them; anything less is irresponsible and immature. It's not society's job to raise others' children so that the parents don't have to.
 
Originally posted by: GRIFFIN1
Originally posted by: Gulzakar

She is teaching this little girl Spanish first then English second. Does that seem like a good idea?
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She doesn't sound like the Queen of good ideas.
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Actually that is a excellent idea. You are supposed to teach your kids a 2nd language before you teach them english. Makes them much smarter and they will have 12 years of english in school.

 
Originally posted by: Gulzakar
exactly.

it's an adult evening...eating, boozing. A FAREWELL party...and she wants to (note again: not "has to") bring the two-year old! Her mother watches the child all the time.

:Q
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Not appropriate for children. Sounds like another bad decision on her part.
 
Originally posted by: GRIFFIN1
Originally posted by: Gulzakar

She is teaching this little girl Spanish first then English second. Does that seem like a good idea?
Click to expand...

She doesn't sound like the Queen of good ideas.
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What's wrong with that?

Chances are, they'll learn English living here anyway and Spanish might be forgotten so its better to have them grounded in the less used language IMO.
 
Originally posted by: iamme
Originally posted by: Gulzakar
She is teaching this little girl Spanish first then English second. Does that seem like a good idea?
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i don't see anythning wrong with that. in fact, i think it is a good idea. i learned Korean first and then English. now i can speak both. i have a nephew who learned korean first and now is learning English through school. he can speak both well.
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It might be a good idea, because if you live in the US you're going to get lots of outside reinforcement for English whereas not so much for Spanish. If you want to be equally good at both, learning the less used first would probably cement it better. Just a thought, because I have no idea what I'm talking about.
 
this thread reminds me of spanglish.

pics would only ruin the vision of Paz Vega I have dancing in my head. 😛
 
Reminds me of the morons that brought two year-olds (and younger!) to the NASCAR IMAX movie this past weekend.


Morons.


Babies and 100dB NASCAR engines don't mix.
 
Originally posted by: Gurck
Originally posted by: Bryophyte
She's a single working mother. You fault her for not placing her daughter after her workplace during her free hours? She doesn't get very much time to spend with her kid as it is. Should she bring her when there is booze? Probably not. But as a working woman, maybe she doesn't think it's in her best interest to turn down office "socializing" for fear of the repercussions on her career.
Click to expand...

I guess you're just playing devil's advocate, since I can't understand how someone could actually take her position... but the OP did say that the woman's mother typically looks after the kid, why couldn't she that night?

I think this attitude about kids is very detrimental to our society. People seem to think having a child or children entitles them to ridiculous privelages, such as having everything on earth G-rated, being able to disrupt an entire public area by not even trying to hush the little bastards when they're making more noise than a jet engine at takeoff, etc... If someone chooses to have children, they're choosing to raise them; anything less is irresponsible and immature. It's not society's job to raise others' children so that the parents don't have to.
Click to expand...


Yeah. I know its hard to raise kids....but no one fvcking made you have them, so why should everyone have to suffer?

Still, I would have prefered the subtle approach in this instance. Just gone to the party, got rip roaring drunk and gone out of my way to make it the most child-unfriendly event it could possibly be. (+2 points if you spill beer on her son)
 
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