alkemyst
No Lifer
- Feb 13, 2001
- 83,769
- 19
- 81
hmmm that's only if you are putting the weight on sex, which I think is definitely stupid, actually I'd say utterly retarded. People who think that way usually have had very few or no sex partners. Once you been with a half dozen women even, you begin to realize how little sex matters in determining a life long partner. This believe is one of the major contributing factors to divorce/cheating....people marry their 'first' and then wonder why they start wanting to go out later on in life alone.
Another trend is no one wants things to be difficult/work at things anymore. You simply replace your TV, Computer, Partner...with a new model once things don't work out.
The main things in determining a partner should be absolute compatiblity...this doesn't mean you have to like the same things, just that those differences you are ok with...also the knowledge that whoever you choose would help you with the most difficult things you may face and want to see you excel in your interests. There is a lot more of course, but whether or not they were your only lay or whether or not they have been with 100-200 partners shouldn't really be an issue.
When I go out clubbing, there are many women that are married looking for sex and only sex, no relationship...some won't even give you their real name or number. I have gone along with it a few times and it's always great sex. The things I have heard is mostly when they get wild in the bedroom it turns into a 'where did you learn this?' 'why are you doing this now? Are you seeing someone else?" etc, also their mates claim they are too tired for sex constantly or belittle their wants for it (are you an adult or a teenager? was one thing this chicks husband always said to her).
Their loss is my gain.
Humans *are* animals. The ONLY difference between us and the rest of the animal kingdom is that we have the intelligence to come up with morals and rules and such.
It's our INTELLIGENCE (or lack thereof...depends on your point of view..heh) that makes us want to change our physical natures to reach a moral goal.
(BTW: I'd be willing to bet the reason religion has pushed monogamy for so long was because a monogamous couple is a bit less likely to catch STD's... Think about it.)
It's our INTELLIGENCE (or lack thereof...depends on your point of view..heh) that makes us want to change our physical natures to reach a moral goal.
(BTW: I'd be willing to bet the reason religion has pushed monogamy for so long was because a monogamous couple is a bit less likely to catch STD's... Think about it.)
EXman
Lifer
- Jul 12, 2001
- 20,079
- 15
- 81
Should I also assume you don't think their are not any idiots out there? Or that this senario has not already played out? Because it has many times over. plah leez I am just trying to state that would be a painfully akward moment that tragically didn't have to happen. that is all.
And tell me these girls are now happily married with kids, have a loving and faithful husband. I don't buy it.
shiner
Lifer
- Jul 18, 2000
- 17,112
- 1
- 0
The ones I have kept in touch with are. In fact one of them is married to a minister now and they have 3 kids. Oh my God......that means....say it isn't so....that means she and her husband had sex.....but...but....that's a sin right? How in the world can a minister live with himself for being so sinful??? Ohhh the horror!!!!
You are seriously, seriously naive. You have an unfortunate malformed perception of women these days, and some day you'll get a rude awakening; when you find our your SO *was* one of these women.
Many of those professional women of ostensible high moral character that you might know were plenty "freaky" back in school, or at some point earlier in their life. Yes, and many of these women are now in committed, monogamous relationships.
Maybe that's why I don't have a girlfriend/wife. I don't want to waste my time on such a woman who's been sleeping around with everybody else but me. Thinking about it makes me feel really pissed off. Of course, I do know I have sexual issues like I said. Maybe I'm too jealous. To each his own, but I can't overcome this part of my personality.
shiner
Lifer
- Jul 18, 2000
- 17,112
- 1
- 0
Puuuuuhlease. How would you know about her past? Are you going to interrogate anyone unfortunate enough to think about becoming your wife? Lie detector test and sodium penathol aren't cheap you know.
Who cares what someone did in their sexual past? I mean unless of course they are screwing AIDS infected monkeys in Zaire or sleeping with the 1991 Denver Broncos.
Eventually you're going to have to, or find a woman who's never been with another man. Then of course you run the risk of her need to "explore." I bet the percentage of women who remain abstinent and then remain with the same man for their entire sexual lives is extremely low.
It sucks, but it's reality.
Heck I know my views are wrong. At least that couple you mentioned had three kids, that explains it all. But I do get that shivering feeling, I feel like my feet don't hold me anymore when I imagine I finally found the woman I been waiting for my whole life and she's been a sleep around. No, that wouldn't be easy to accept. Of course, it's important to make the right decision, maybe a deal with yourself... At least she'd stay with you, not with those ones... But I think I'd still feel somewhat cheated. Heck maybe I'm just crazy, I know that.
I know nobody cares, but just for the heck of it I'll explain it. I'm not like some guy who looks for a virgin to marry, I'm not. I don't need just a virgin for a happy marriage, I need a woman whom I'll love and who will love me. Of course, it would be a huge plus if she'd be a virgin. And in case not (most likely) well... I don't know but I feel I wouldn't split up with the woman I love just b/c she's not a virgin like some dumb/overly jealous people do. But I can guarantee I would feel bad about it, maybe for a very long time.
Projecting the image of your towel on me?
Please don't. Heck, how do you know that I even have any towels or not. You know only you own towels and talk about them No offense meant, BTW.Funny how nobody has mentioned how trust and respect enter into the equation. That's why I don't cheat, because I trust my wife and respect her. It is a part of the foundation that allows us to build our relationship.
How would you like it if some dude was spreading his seed in your wife? Would you just say, "Hey, it's a natural animal instinct. Let me know when you two are finished cause I'd really like to take a nap."
How would you like it if some dude was spreading his seed in your wife? Would you just say, "Hey, it's a natural animal instinct. Let me know when you two are finished cause I'd really like to take a nap."
It has been mentioned...that was just before the thread turned into the twisted monster that it has become.
it's an evolutionary reason why men cheat. they naturally want to increase their reproductive potential by impregnating as many females as possible. this increases their number of offspring and thus their fitness.
women on the other hand, naturally want to raise their children and find a mate who can provide for her to increase her offsprings' chance of survival, hence they are less likely to cheat.
i'm not trying to be sexist, it's just evolution.
women on the other hand, naturally want to raise their children and find a mate who can provide for her to increase her offsprings' chance of survival, hence they are less likely to cheat.
i'm not trying to be sexist, it's just evolution.
Funny, that's what allows our marriage to be open. Trust and respect.
I trust my wife to love me and spend her life with me just as she trusts me to do the same.
I respect my wife enough to allow her to make her own decisions, just as she respects me.
amish
shiner
Lifer
- Jul 18, 2000
- 17,112
- 1
- 0
There's only one reason that men cheat, and it's quite simple. They do not have discipline/self control.
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