*Sigh* This is why you don't touch other people's stuff...

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Black88GTA

Diamond Member
Sep 9, 2003
3,430
0
0
Originally posted by: slsmnaz
Originally posted by: Black88GTA
So please, before you pass judgment, try to get all sides of the story. I can completely sympathize with the OP on this.

and when might that happen?

Of course you can sympathize cause your mom wasn't fair, you were mistreated, etc. Same old story

Please re-read my post. When did I ever say my mom wasn't fair? Or that I was mistreated?? She just had a habit of "cleaning up" my room whenever I wasn't in it, and losing my things in the process. I guess she was only trying to help, and my repeated pleas of "please don't touch the stuff in my room" fell on deaf ears, because she thought it looked messy and therefore needed cleaning.

You try re-doing a 12 page essay from 5 pm - 4 in the morning, getting ~1.5 hours of sleep, then getting up, going to school, and turning the paper in at 7:30 am - all because your mom took it upon herself to rearrange the crap in your room all the time, despite your wishes to the contrary. The locking doorknob was a last resort for me, since she ignored my requests to stop moving things around.
 

ShadowOfMyself

Diamond Member
Jun 22, 2006
4,227
2
0
Ah well, another ATOT "parents are always right and kids are nothing but tools until they go live by themselves" thread :roll:

Good rant, pretty much everyone hates that, some just have it worse than others :p
 

altonb1

Diamond Member
Feb 5, 2002
6,432
0
71
Originally posted by: irishScott
Originally posted by: oldsmoboat
Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
Originally posted by: OrganizedChaos
solution: buy locking file cabinet

+ paper shredder.

+ get your own place

Don't have the room or the money for any of the above (well, I have the money for the first 2, but I'm saving for other stuff). Working toward it, but I'm stuck for the time being.

No, you choose to stay--you are not STUCK. Quit crying, move the hell out, or just STFU. You have no right to bitch when you are still sucking on the proverbial tit.
 

irishScott

Lifer
Oct 10, 2006
21,562
3
0
Originally posted by: altonb1
Originally posted by: irishScott
Originally posted by: oldsmoboat
Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
Originally posted by: OrganizedChaos
solution: buy locking file cabinet

+ paper shredder.

+ get your own place

Don't have the room or the money for any of the above (well, I have the money for the first 2, but I'm saving for other stuff). Working toward it, but I'm stuck for the time being.

No, you choose to stay--you are not STUCK. Quit crying, move the hell out, or just STFU. You have no right to bitch when you are still sucking on the proverbial tit.

Well, I don't have enough money to rent an apartment. So my only other option is living on the street.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

Yeah, I have do have a choice. :roll: Moron.

I'm an intelligent adult, and I'm better in a lot of ways then the majority of people my age. I don't have to flash my credentials to you or anyone else. I have a right to bitch about anything I have a legit reason for, and I really don't give a shit about your opinion.

Please shut up and take your stupidity out of my thread.

Kthyxbye
 
Oct 4, 2004
10,515
6
81
Thread: My Dad peed on my bed.
ATOTers: Are you over 18? Then it's his house and he can do whatever the fuck he wants. Stop mooching off your parents. Move the fuck out. You have only yourself to blame you good-for-nothing brat that refuses to grow up.
 

newmachineoverlord

Senior member
Jan 22, 2006
484
0
0
Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
Originally posted by: OrganizedChaos
solution: buy locking file cabinet

+ paper shredder.

It sucks to have other people randomize your organized papers because they don't like your filing system, but the only solution is to lock your papers where no one else has access. It helps to have a labeled filing system that anybody else could use with folders that have names like "tax forms 2008".

Not your fault that she messed with your stuff, but there are steps you can take to prevent it.
 

Maximilian

Lifer
Feb 8, 2004
12,604
15
81
Originally posted by: ShadowOfMyself
Ah well, another ATOT "parents are always right and kids are nothing but tools until they go live by themselves" thread :roll:

Good rant, pretty much everyone hates that, some just have it worse than others :p

Ya i don't get it.... i think everyone on ATOT must either be parents themselves or they are the sourpuss kids that always suck up to mommy & daddy and never think to second guess them... i dunno.
 

TheGizmo

Diamond Member
Dec 31, 2000
3,627
0
71
Originally posted by: newmachineoverlord
Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
Originally posted by: OrganizedChaos
solution: buy locking file cabinet

+ paper shredder.

It sucks to have other people randomize your organized papers because they don't like your filing system, but the only solution is to lock your papers where no one else has access. It helps to have a labeled filing system that anybody else could use with folders that have names like "tax forms 2008".

Not your fault that she messed with your stuff, but there are steps you can take to prevent it.

these 3 quotes above.. well except the paper shredder you don't really need that.. or what gwlam12 said, put everything in folders so she shuffles folders instead of papers = the solution to your problem.
 

syee

Senior member
Oct 6, 2001
827
0
76
Well, there really isn't an argument to the "her house, her rules" rule. You ARE living in her house, and if she doesn't like mess or clutter, then she should have a right to "fix" it. Would you like it if a house guest stayed at your house and left mess all over the place?

Anyways, like everyone else has mentioned - get a file cabinet and put your important docs in there. If you dont' have a file cabinet, I'm sure you've got a desk with drawers...put the important docs in there.

You can't really fault the mom for trying to keep her place neat and tidy. "Doing it in your own time" usually amounts to "never" and I'm sure history has kind of proven that, otherwise she would have just let you do it in your own time.
 

Farang

Lifer
Jul 7, 2003
10,913
3
0
Once I realized I was over 18 and had no right to stay at my Dad's house, my relationship with my Dad improved considerably when I had to stay with him. It is their house, find a resolution that makes them happy.
 

clamum

Lifer
Feb 13, 2003
26,256
406
126
Originally posted by: theprodigalrebel
Thread: My Dad peed on my bed.
ATOTers: Are you over 18? Then it's his house and he can do whatever the fuck he wants. Stop mooching off your parents. Move the fuck out. You have only yourself to blame you good-for-nothing brat that refuses to grow up.
lol :thumbsup::D
 

Skunkwourk

Diamond Member
Dec 9, 2004
4,662
1
81
Originally posted by: clamum
Originally posted by: theprodigalrebel
Thread: My Dad peed on my bed.
ATOTers: Are you over 18? Then it's his house and he can do whatever the fuck he wants. Stop mooching off your parents. Move the fuck out. You have only yourself to blame you good-for-nothing brat that refuses to grow up.
lol :thumbsup::D

x2

Seriously, while I agree kids these days and teens feel entitled to do whatever they want, no one ever seems to take the stance that parents have an obligation to raise their children in a manner that also teaches them things like, courtesy, common sense, and tolerance. Its as if providing food and shelter are the only requirements to being an excellent parent on this board.
 

se7en

Platinum Member
Oct 23, 2002
2,303
1
0
Originally posted by: OrganizedChaos
solution: buy locking file cabinet

Or just clean the shit up?

Their house their rules.

Your house your rules.

Learn some respect kid. It doesn't matter what reason your mom had if she said she doesn't like things "X" way then find a better way.

/thread.
 

irishScott

Lifer
Oct 10, 2006
21,562
3
0
Originally posted by: syee
Well, there really isn't an argument to the "her house, her rules" rule. You ARE living in her house, and if she doesn't like mess or clutter, then she should have a right to "fix" it. Would you like it if a house guest stayed at your house and left mess all over the place?

Anyways, like everyone else has mentioned - get a file cabinet and put your important docs in there. If you dont' have a file cabinet, I'm sure you've got a desk with drawers...put the important docs in there.

You can't really fault the mom for trying to keep her place neat and tidy. "Doing it in your own time" usually amounts to "never" and I'm sure history has kind of proven that, otherwise she would have just let you do it in your own time.

It's not either. It was VERY neat and tidy. They were all neatly, evenly stacked, and while visible, they didn't block or hinder access to anything in any way.

I don't have room for a file cabinet, or adequate shelf space, and my desk is cheap. It has one very shallow drawer that I use for office supplies.

I've mentioned both in previous posts.

So you know me that well now? Yes, I procrastinated close to the point of disaster in High School. That was 2 years ago, and college more or less forced me to become efficient and highly organized. My current procrastination is relatively negligible, and I'm the one who's doing all of the paperwork/making all of the calls to get off medical leave in the first place.

I am independent of them in almost every way save financially.
 

irishScott

Lifer
Oct 10, 2006
21,562
3
0
Originally posted by: se7en
Originally posted by: OrganizedChaos
solution: buy locking file cabinet

Or just clean the shit up?

Their house their rules.

Your house your rules.

Learn some respect kid. It doesn't matter what reason your mom had if she said she doesn't like things "X" way then find a better way.

/thread.

Read the thread. The room was/is fucking clean.

As for learning some respect, WTF. It's my stuff. Stuff she has no involvement with, financially or otherwise. So because it's her house, I'm supposed to just take the whip with a salute and stand for this?

I have higher morals/principles and higher expectations of people than that.

I'm their son. Not their kid. There's a difference.
 

Babbles

Diamond Member
Jan 4, 2001
8,253
14
81
Originally posted by: irishScott
Originally posted by: syee
Well, there really isn't an argument to the "her house, her rules" rule. You ARE living in her house, and if she doesn't like mess or clutter, then she should have a right to "fix" it. Would you like it if a house guest stayed at your house and left mess all over the place?

Anyways, like everyone else has mentioned - get a file cabinet and put your important docs in there. If you dont' have a file cabinet, I'm sure you've got a desk with drawers...put the important docs in there.

You can't really fault the mom for trying to keep her place neat and tidy. "Doing it in your own time" usually amounts to "never" and I'm sure history has kind of proven that, otherwise she would have just let you do it in your own time.

It's not either. It was VERY neat and tidy. They were all neatly, evenly stacked, and while visible, they didn't block or hinder access to anything in any way.

I don't have room for a file cabinet, or adequate shelf space, and my desk is cheap. It has one very shallow drawer that I use for office supplies.

I've mentioned both in previous posts.

So you know me that well now? Yes, I procrastinated close to the point of disaster in High School. That was 2 years ago, and college more or less forced me to become efficient and highly organized. My current procrastination is relatively negligible, and I'm the one who's doing all of the paperwork/making all of the calls to get off medical leave in the first place.

I am independent of them in almost every way save financially.

I would wager that one little thing, the financial part, is probably a huge thing for you to rely on them; supporting a grown person is not a cheap endeavor.

I can care less about your ranting, but in this case you do seem to dismiss the financial aspect of their support.

"I'm independent. . . except for that money thing."

Then, by most people's reasonable definitions, you are not independent.


 

Eeezee

Diamond Member
Jul 23, 2005
9,922
0
76
Consider it the price you pay for not having to pay the rent yourself. My mom did the same thing when I lived at home (high school). Most mothers do this.

There are only two solutions. Move out or invest in a door lock (but if you leave your keys lying around, you can be sure she'll wander in when you're not looking)

Edit:
Also, you can't claim to be independent if they support you financially. I got some help from my parents during college while I lived 2 hours away, but I never claimed myself as being "independent" because technically they paid the bills for awhile. While I was in a dorm, they had the right to say and do pretty much whatever they want in my dorm. They paid the bills, so they made the law.

Independence is so important to most college students that they'd rather take huge loans and truly live on their own. They have the happiness of independence, but they're in debt. You chose to stay out of debt and live at home, so you're going to have to deal with those consequences one way or another. If you install a lock on your door, your parents have the right to remove it.

I think the filing cabinet idea is best. If you organize papers as soon as you get them (this takes maybe a minute out of your 1440 minute day) into a filing cabinet then you won't have to worry about it. Filling cabinets are cheap, too. Hell, just get a filing folder; you shouldn't have too many important documents.

I keep a filing box. Whenever I get an important document (bank statement, insurance policy, receipts, etc.), I throw it in the box. I've set up some partitions to divide the papers by type. The box is on the floor of my closet, where it's out of sight. This is the easiest way to do things, and it's something for you to consider. I somehow doubt that having piles of papers spread all over your room as any more efficient than a filing box.
 

Kelvrick

Lifer
Feb 14, 2001
18,422
5
81
Originally posted by: irishScott
Originally posted by: syee
Well, there really isn't an argument to the "her house, her rules" rule. You ARE living in her house, and if she doesn't like mess or clutter, then she should have a right to "fix" it. Would you like it if a house guest stayed at your house and left mess all over the place?

Anyways, like everyone else has mentioned - get a file cabinet and put your important docs in there. If you dont' have a file cabinet, I'm sure you've got a desk with drawers...put the important docs in there.

You can't really fault the mom for trying to keep her place neat and tidy. "Doing it in your own time" usually amounts to "never" and I'm sure history has kind of proven that, otherwise she would have just let you do it in your own time.

It's not either. It was VERY neat and tidy. They were all neatly, evenly stacked, and while visible, they didn't block or hinder access to anything in any way.

I don't have room for a file cabinet, or adequate shelf space, and my desk is cheap. It has one very shallow drawer that I use for office supplies.

I've mentioned both in previous posts.

So you know me that well now? Yes, I procrastinated close to the point of disaster in High School. That was 2 years ago, and college more or less forced me to become efficient and highly organized. My current procrastination is relatively negligible, and I'm the one who's doing all of the paperwork/making all of the calls to get off medical leave in the first place.

I am independent of them in almost every way save financially.

I'm with the "whats with parents can do whatever the fuck they want" crowd.

The OP's mom sounds like the one that would throw a fit if the OP had enough and then wanted to move out. She'd be missing her little "baby boy" and wonder why he left her.

You guys are telling him to respect their house, well why don't they give him a little respect back by letting him deal with his shit? If they want some little sheltered kid who has someone come and organize his shit whenever he doesn't do it, then I guess they like raising another little welfare/housing shit that grows up, fucks up and expects the government (other tax payers) to bail them out. Hey, we live in the US, if we didn't like the laws, gtf out. A lot of you probably have parent issues. Yea, you still love them, but you'd go crazy if you still had to live with them and can't wait to get away from them after 2 days of holiday gettogethers.

FYI, I moved out when I was 18, after high school and have only been back to visit and sleep on an inflatable mattress. A few weeks after I was gone, bam, my room was torn down and the living room was extended but I still always felt welcome because they respected my stuff and me as an adult.

EDIT: I'd have to agree though, the easiest way is to get a filing cabinet to keep everyone happy. My mom was the same way until some missing papers blew up on her and she never touched my papers again. Thats just Mom though, so keep her happy.
 

irishScott

Lifer
Oct 10, 2006
21,562
3
0
Originally posted by: Babbles
Originally posted by: irishScott
Originally posted by: syee
Well, there really isn't an argument to the "her house, her rules" rule. You ARE living in her house, and if she doesn't like mess or clutter, then she should have a right to "fix" it. Would you like it if a house guest stayed at your house and left mess all over the place?

Anyways, like everyone else has mentioned - get a file cabinet and put your important docs in there. If you dont' have a file cabinet, I'm sure you've got a desk with drawers...put the important docs in there.

You can't really fault the mom for trying to keep her place neat and tidy. "Doing it in your own time" usually amounts to "never" and I'm sure history has kind of proven that, otherwise she would have just let you do it in your own time.

It's not either. It was VERY neat and tidy. They were all neatly, evenly stacked, and while visible, they didn't block or hinder access to anything in any way.

I don't have room for a file cabinet, or adequate shelf space, and my desk is cheap. It has one very shallow drawer that I use for office supplies.

I've mentioned both in previous posts.

So you know me that well now? Yes, I procrastinated close to the point of disaster in High School. That was 2 years ago, and college more or less forced me to become efficient and highly organized. My current procrastination is relatively negligible, and I'm the one who's doing all of the paperwork/making all of the calls to get off medical leave in the first place.

I am independent of them in almost every way save financially.

I would wager that one little thing, the financial part, is probably a huge thing for you to rely on them; supporting a grown person is not a cheap endeavor.

I can care less about your ranting, but in this case you do seem to dismiss the financial aspect of their support.

"I'm independent. . . except for that money thing."

Then, by most people's reasonable definitions, you are not independent.

Yes, and it sucks. Unfortunately there's not much I can do about it for the next couple of years. I have a job, but it's nowhere near enough to pay my own way entirely.

This is simply a fact that I have little to no control over. As soon as I get my degree and a livable salary, I'm gone.

That said, I manage what money I do have exclusively, in my own accounts, in my own name. I invest and save as much as practical. I get the oil changed, I cook/get my own food, and do almost every other action you could imagine as independently as possible of my parents.
 

se7en

Platinum Member
Oct 23, 2002
2,303
1
0
Originally posted by: irishScott

Read the thread. The room was/is fucking clean.

As for learning some respect, WTF. It's my stuff. Stuff she has no involvement with, financially or otherwise. So because it's her house, I'm supposed to just take the whip with a salute and stand for this?

I have higher morals/principles and higher expectations of people than that.

I'm their son. Not their kid. There's a difference.

Obviously if it was clean to your mom she wouldn't have tocuhed anything. You said yourself "OCD much" so you should know her by now to know what "her" clean is and what your "mess" is to her.

HAHAHAAH dude you have so much to learn. Yes if its her house that you are living in it then she could have tossed all the shit out to the garbage rather than restacking it. When you stay under someone else's house you are damned right you take the whip and offer them some water if they get tired of hitting you with it.

No you are not a son until you grow the fcvk up, learn some respect and get the fvck out of their house. Until then you will be a kid. You think if you f'd around with a landord they would play with you? You would be one homeless "son" then. . .lol
 

Eeezee

Diamond Member
Jul 23, 2005
9,922
0
76
Originally posted by: Kelvrick
Originally posted by: irishScott
Originally posted by: syee
Well, there really isn't an argument to the "her house, her rules" rule. You ARE living in her house, and if she doesn't like mess or clutter, then she should have a right to "fix" it. Would you like it if a house guest stayed at your house and left mess all over the place?

Anyways, like everyone else has mentioned - get a file cabinet and put your important docs in there. If you dont' have a file cabinet, I'm sure you've got a desk with drawers...put the important docs in there.

You can't really fault the mom for trying to keep her place neat and tidy. "Doing it in your own time" usually amounts to "never" and I'm sure history has kind of proven that, otherwise she would have just let you do it in your own time.

It's not either. It was VERY neat and tidy. They were all neatly, evenly stacked, and while visible, they didn't block or hinder access to anything in any way.

I don't have room for a file cabinet, or adequate shelf space, and my desk is cheap. It has one very shallow drawer that I use for office supplies.

I've mentioned both in previous posts.

So you know me that well now? Yes, I procrastinated close to the point of disaster in High School. That was 2 years ago, and college more or less forced me to become efficient and highly organized. My current procrastination is relatively negligible, and I'm the one who's doing all of the paperwork/making all of the calls to get off medical leave in the first place.

I am independent of them in almost every way save financially.

I'm with the "whats with parents can do whatever the fuck they want" crowd.

The OP's mom sounds like the one that would throw a fit if the OP had enough and then wanted to move out. She'd be missing her little "baby boy" and wonder why he left her.

You guys are telling him to respect their house, well why don't they give him a little respect back by letting him deal with his shit? If they want some little sheltered kid who has someone come and organize his shit whenever he doesn't do it, then I guess they like raising another little welfare/housing shit that grows up, fucks up and expects the government (other tax payers) to bail them out. Hey, we live in the US, if we didn't like the laws, gtf out. A lot of you probably have parent issues. Yea, you still love them, but you'd go crazy if you still had to live with them and can't wait to get away from them after 2 days of holiday gettogethers.

FYI, I moved out when I was 18, after high school and have only been back to visit and sleep on an inflatable mattress. A few weeks after I was gone, bam, my room was torn down and the living room was extended but I still always felt welcome because they respected my stuff and me as an adult.

That's the beauty of going independent; if you're really just sick of being babied and want to become an adult, you're free to do so. There's nothing stopping the OP from going out and getting a job and supporting himself. It doesn't matter how much the parents complain, the OP has the final say because he's 20. If he's living for free in his parents' house, don't you think he should be giving SOMETHING back? I'm sure he does some chores around the house, but he'd have to do those same chores if he lived on his own. Being dependent means you respect whoever is caring for you, which is really what this comes down to. His parents are supporting him financially. Ultimately, they call the shots, just like landlords. If your landlord drops by and says you'll be evicted if you don't clean up your apartment, do you tell them to fuck off and get kicked to the curb or do you obey?

Many parents do what they think is best for their children, which includes keeping their room clean. They don't realize that sheltering is a poor parenting strategy, it's just instinct for them. You MUST realize that most Americans don't think rationally.
 

Agentbolt

Diamond Member
Jul 9, 2004
3,340
1
0
For fuck's sake, is there a particular reason you're ignoring every single person's advice to just get a goddamned locking file cabinet? They sell them in the little cube version for like 30 bucks. It can go on your freaking floor, so don't whine about not having enough space. Problem = solved.
 

Eeezee

Diamond Member
Jul 23, 2005
9,922
0
76
Originally posted by: irishScott
Yes, and it sucks. Unfortunately there's not much I can do about it for the next couple of years. I have a job, but it's nowhere near enough to pay my own way entirely.

This is simply a fact that I have little to no control over. As soon as I get my degree and a livable salary, I'm gone.

That said, I manage what money I do have exclusively, in my own accounts, in my own name. I invest and save as much as practical. I get the oil changed, I cook/get my own food, and do almost every other action you could imagine as independently as possible of my parents.

You can't honestly claim that you are unable to support yourself financially. You sound like a white male, so there aren't many scholarships for you, but there are probably a hundred different student loan programs that will gladly give you all the money you need to pay your own way. If you move out and file independently, you'll be eligible for need-based grants and subsidized loans. You should already be eligible for enough unsubsidized loan money to pay rent, tuition, utilities, and food every year without having to work at all.

"I'm an adult, I have my own bank account and cook food all by myself." Bullshit. You can't claim to be an adult until you're living on your own. Either deal with your landlords (parents) or get out. You're lucky your parents don't charge you rent, what with paying your tuition for you (I have made this assumption, correct me if I'm wrong).

You have a ton of control over your financial situation, you're just not willing to admit it. It has become easier than ever before to pay for college.