Poll: How many here have actually read the bible?

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Spamela

Diamond Member
Oct 30, 2000
3,859
0
76
Originally posted by: Steeplerot
Originally posted by: fiasco
Originally posted by: Steeplerot
Originally posted by: hscorpio
We'll I haven't read it all, but I did read Ezekiel 4:12-15 once. :Q


Ezekiel 4:12-15 (King James Version)
King James Version (KJV)

Public Domain
A Public Domain Bible KJV at Zondervan Zondervan

12And thou shalt eat it as barley cakes, and thou shalt bake it with dung that cometh out of man, in their sight.

13And the LORD said, Even thus shall the children of Israel eat their defiled bread among the Gentiles, whither I will drive them.

14Then said I, Ah Lord GOD! behold, my soul hath not been polluted: for from my youth up even till now have I not eaten of that which dieth of itself, or is torn in pieces; neither came there abominable flesh into my mouth.

15Then he said unto me, Lo, I have given thee cow's dung for man's dung, and thou shalt prepare thy bread therewith.







Ok rip, or robert or someone........explain this one....I remember that one too...

I really want to hear someone try to explain this even if it's not a christian...plz?

It sounds like some sick-ass german pr0n I found ages ago on like 8mm film...gag...

sold it to some metalband 50$ for stage stuff....yuck!


I dare someone to print that out and ask your church thingyperson the meaning of it...post back sunday or whatever....:laugh:

(I don't want to hear to ignore it in some way....ask them wtf. it's in there it has to mean something if they pick and choose from that same book) church sanctioned gannon or whatever it's called..



Gosh you don't have to step all over something you don't understand. That's just plain ignorance, stubborness and arrogance in the comments you made.

So no answer huh? Didn't think so.

iignorance? from he looks of things I have read the bible more then some of the self-admitted christians in here. give it up.

the passage from Ezekiel basically is a prophecy of the punishments
that the people of Israel will have to endure as a consequence
of their sin - they'll be so humbled that they'll have to bake their
bread using animal dung for fuel.

in answer to the OP: i've read much of it, but not all.

Edit: spelling
 

MobiusPizza

Platinum Member
Apr 23, 2004
2,001
0
0
erm the bible I have don't have puntuations. English is not my first language, cant read it at all.
 

Steeplerot

Lifer
Mar 29, 2004
13,051
6
81
Originally posted by: Spamela

iignorance? from he looks of things I have read the bible more then some of the self-admitted christians in here. g it up.

the passage from Ezekiel basically is a prophecy of the punishments
that the people of Israel will have to endure as a consequence
of their sin - they'll be so humbled that they'll have to bake their
bread using animal dung for fuel.

in answer to the OP: i've read much of it, but not all.

Edit: spelling[/quote]

Who needs mesquite....yummy.

And it mentioned more then animal dung.
 

Spamela

Diamond Member
Oct 30, 2000
3,859
0
76
Originally posted by: Steeplerot
Originally posted by: Spamela

iignorance? from he looks of things I have read the bible more then some of the self-admitted christians in here. g it up.

the passage from Ezekiel basically is a prophecy of the punishments
that the people of Israel will have to endure as a consequence
of their sin - they'll be so humbled that they'll have to bake their
bread using animal dung for fuel.

in answer to the OP: i've read much of it, but not all.

Edit: spelling

Who needs mesquite....yummy.

And it mentioned more then animal dung.[/quote]

true. using human feces would have been a bigger
humiliation, but Ezekiel negotiated.
 

sandorski

No Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
70,823
6,369
126
Originally posted by: Rainsford
Read all of it when I was in Catholic school. I like that Jesus guy, how come more people can't be like him?

Yup, someone should start an organization of like minded individuals or something.
 

Vic

Elite Member
Jun 12, 2001
50,422
14,337
136
I have read the entire Bible cover to cover twice, first time KJV, second time NIV. The Gospels are excellent, of course. Other parts are mixed. Judeo-Christianity tries but, except for Jesus, never seems to truly understand God.

I have read the Book of Mormon along with the D&C and POGP. I won't do so again, 'nuff said.

I have also read the Quran. On that note, I am currently reading "The Essential Rumi" with translations by Coleman Barks. No religious is perfect, but Islam IMO understands God better than any other major religion, and I say this even though I do not consider myself a Muslim.
 

ExpertNovice

Senior member
Mar 4, 2005
939
0
0
I have read most of it.

Since it was written by man and given man's desire to sway opinion and be fallible I have a problem with much of it.

First, I'm not a person who believes every word is absolutely the way it is. I believe much of it is anecdotal (the good samaritan) and much of it is metaphorical (the garden of eden).

Second, much of it is meant to sway and I could no more believe in an Allah that says "kill or tax non-Muslims" than I could in a God that told Abraham to sacrifice his child. I attribute this to the fallacies of mankind not the power of God.

Now, why do you ask?
 

Buck Armstrong

Platinum Member
Dec 17, 2004
2,015
1
0
Yes, I've read the entire thing twice. The first time was in a college class called "The Bible as Literature", so we read and dissected each book in order, with the Prof. adding his own original translations to help us actually comprehend what we were reading. Once I got the hang of "Olde English" or whatever the hell the KJV is, it really became a very interesting book (I'm into ancient history) instead of the boring, convoluted mass of Thees and Thous most people encounter when they try to read it.

The second time, it was just to prove I could do it again. Much easier reading than it was before I took the class.
 

judasmachine

Diamond Member
Sep 15, 2002
8,515
3
81
I've read it in it's entirety twice in my life. It never made me feel anything. I just don't get it. But I've also read volumes on American Native Religions, Zen Buddhism, Hinduism, Shintoism, The Qu'ran, and a few others I don't recall. I once sought religion, but in seeking I realized there isn't any substance in it.
 

Buck Armstrong

Platinum Member
Dec 17, 2004
2,015
1
0
Originally posted by: Steeplerot
Originally posted by: fiasco
Originally posted by: Steeplerot
Originally posted by: hscorpio
We'll I haven't read it all, but I did read Ezekiel 4:12-15 once. :Q


Ezekiel 4:12-15 (King James Version)
King James Version (KJV)

Public Domain
A Public Domain Bible KJV at Zondervan Zondervan

12And thou shalt eat it as barley cakes, and thou shalt bake it with dung that cometh out of man, in their sight.

13And the LORD said, Even thus shall the children of Israel eat their defiled bread among the Gentiles, whither I will drive them.

14Then said I, Ah Lord GOD! behold, my soul hath not been polluted: for from my youth up even till now have I not eaten of that which dieth of itself, or is torn in pieces; neither came there abominable flesh into my mouth.

15Then he said unto me, Lo, I have given thee cow's dung for man's dung, and thou shalt prepare thy bread therewith.







Ok rip, or robert or someone........explain this one....I remember that one too...

I really want to hear someone try to explain this even if it's not a christian...plz?

It sounds like some sick-ass german pr0n I found ages ago on like 8mm film...gag...

sold it to some metalband 50$ for stage stuff....yuck!


I dare someone to print that out and ask your church thingyperson the meaning of it...post back sunday or whatever....:laugh:

(I don't want to hear to ignore it in some way....ask them wtf. it's in there it has to mean something if they pick and choose from that same book) church sanctioned gannon or whatever it's called..



Gosh you don't have to step all over something you don't understand. That's just plain ignorance, stubborness and arrogance in the comments you made.

So no answer huh? Didn't think so.

ignorance? from he looks of things I have read the bible more then some of the self-admitted christians in here. give it up.

You don't have to be a Christian to read and enjoy a historical document. I used to read alot of Norse mythology too, but that don't mean I'm goin' to Valhalla.

When you actually read the Bible, you realize that much of what you hear in church is simply not scriptural. That bugs me, because if you're going to base your life on a book, you owe to yourself to read it instead of letting another person "interpret" it for you.
 

randym431

Golden Member
Jun 4, 2003
1,270
1
0
I actually read the whole thing a few years ago over a month. God didn?t have much tolerance in the old test. I liked the story where God fed the masses roaming in the desert, daily, with bread-like stuff that formed on the ground (like dew). But many of the wanders, after awhile, wanted MEAT an doesth protest/bitched/griped. So God dropped hundreds of birds (cant remember what kinds) for those wanders that were unhappy with God's daily bread, to eat. And all that eat the birds - died. Those that were non complainers and grateful for the bread lived. I think some 25 thousand ate the birds and died, it said.

Best line from the whole Bible?
"Be Christ Like"

I had a lot of trouble reading the King James version, so I read and recommend other versions that are easier to read & understand.

Another great story is, and I'm a little unclear here, is of the King that was to go to war. He wanted to know for sure if he was going to win or not, so he did a big no no. He called on a lady that HE had band from the area, a lady physic, to bring from the grave and talk with another king (cant remember the name, but this king was dead), and he wanted her to bring this dead king forth so he could ask the future outcome of the soon to be war. Would he win or not, live or die. This kings spirit, that was brought forth was really pissed he had been called on from the grave and pretty much cursed this other king to death in the battle. The king cursed was so terrified, and he did die in the battle. Great stories. I'd need to re read to remember the names and details better.
 

Gigantopithecus

Diamond Member
Dec 14, 2004
7,664
0
71
I've read the vast majority of the Old & New Testaments, the Talmud, the Book of Mormon, the Koran, the Bhagavad Gita, the Lun Yu (analects of Confucius). I like Greek & Norse mythology better.
 

judasmachine

Diamond Member
Sep 15, 2002
8,515
3
81
Originally posted by: sandorski
Originally posted by: Rainsford
Read all of it when I was in Catholic school. I like that Jesus guy, how come more people can't be like him?

Yup, someone should start an organization of like minded individuals or something.


They'll shoot all of you. Hasn't history taught you damn hippies anything? MLK Jr., Jesus, Jon Lennon, Etc.
 

slurmsmackenzie

Golden Member
Jun 4, 2004
1,413
0
0
Originally posted by: MonkeyK
Read most of it and want to know why the heck Christians celebrate Easter by gorging on ham?

christians don't celebrate easter. if someone you know is, they aren't a christian.

jesus said (speaking about the memorial...wine, bread) do this in rememberance of me. it was the ONLY thing that he instucted the apostles to commemerate. easter is on the same page of the bible as christmas and birthdays. and while i'm on holidays.... i wonder how many indians are thankful on thanksgiving. well, maybe they're thankful they suvived the genocide... which ones are left, anyways.

 

Skyclad1uhm1

Lifer
Aug 10, 2001
11,383
87
91
Originally posted by: miketheidiot
Originally posted by: Rainsford
Read all of it when I was in Catholic school. I like that Jesus guy, how come more people can't be like him?

i'll second that.

There were a lot more people like that in the 70s, they were called Hippies. The religious right hated them though.

Oh, and I have read it completely. More than once. That's why I don't believe in it.
 

datalink7

Lifer
Jan 23, 2001
16,765
6
81
Originally posted by: Vic
I have read the entire Bible cover to cover twice, first time KJV, second time NIV. The Gospels are excellent, of course. Other parts are mixed. Judeo-Christianity tries but, except for Jesus, never seems to truly understand God.

I have read the Book of Mormon along with the D&C and POGP. I won't do so again, 'nuff said.

I have also read the Quran. On that note, I am currently reading "The Essential Rumi" with translations by Coleman Barks. No religious is perfect, but Islam IMO understands God better than any other major religion, and I say this even though I do not consider myself a Muslim.

What do you mean by "understands God"? Is this a comparison of how close they are in line with your understanding of what God is, or a certain consistency within the text themselves?
 

Tab

Lifer
Sep 15, 2002
12,145
0
76
Originally posted by: datalink7
Originally posted by: Vic
I have read the entire Bible cover to cover twice, first time KJV, second time NIV. The Gospels are excellent, of course. Other parts are mixed. Judeo-Christianity tries but, except for Jesus, never seems to truly understand God.

I have read the Book of Mormon along with the D&C and POGP. I won't do so again, 'nuff said.

I have also read the Quran. On that note, I am currently reading "The Essential Rumi" with translations by Coleman Barks. No religious is perfect, but Islam IMO understands God better than any other major religion, and I say this even though I do not consider myself a Muslim.

What do you mean by "understands God"? Is this a comparison of how close they are in line with our understanding of what God is, or a certain consistency within the text themselves?

I'd like to know the same as well...

What do the terms I highlighted mean exactly?
 

aidanjm

Lifer
Aug 9, 2004
12,411
2
0
Originally posted by: Spamela
the passage from Ezekiel basically is a prophecy of the punishments
that the people of Israel will have to endure as a consequence
of their sin - they'll be so humbled that they'll have to bake their
bread using animal dung for fuel.

that doesn't seem like a very plausible explanation. Cooking with cow dung is a pretty widespread practice around the world. Cow dung burns at a very high temperature, what's the problem with cooking with it? Why is it humbling? Dried, aged cow dung is similar to old wood, it has no smell, it's light, stacks well, etc. Doesn't that passqage imply people will have to actually eat human sh1t? Seems kind of sick to me...
 

CaptnKirk

Lifer
Jul 25, 2002
10,053
0
71
Just like most other novels - everyone dies in the end.

Now maybe if they make it into a feel good movie & get the right actors . . .
or perhaps MTV makes a Hot Rap Video . . . .





</ sarcasm>
 

piasabird

Lifer
Feb 6, 2002
17,168
60
91
I read the Bible from the first word to the last in that order.

Many people read the bible but it might be interesting to know who has actually read it from cover to cover like a novel. Many people just study it. I think there is a benefit to reading the bible in the order that it is at the present time. The New testament is more understandable if you have read the old testament. It is actually a collection of books, and not just one book.

The Mormon King James Version is what I read. It is an exact King James version but has Mormon Footnotes, etc. I have compared it to a normal King James Version just to be sure.
 

EagleKeeper

Discussion Club Moderator<br>Elite Member
Staff member
Oct 30, 2000
42,589
5
0
Made it though all the Old Testiment and part of the New.

Then started over trying to actually interpret the "stories" that were being told.