Nowadays, what's the point of getting married?

[JEDI]

from this thread about no longer motivated in going to the gym:
http://forums.anandtech.com/me...id=38&threadid=2272866

one of the replies:
if you're a chick, did you recently get married?

i dont see any upside to getting married. divorce rate = 50%. and she'll take 1/2 of what you have.

she might get fat. ie: the comment above.
i have a co-worker that got married a year ago. you can tell she went from a size 4 to a size 6, if not a 8. (no, she didnt have a kid.)

so what are the upsides (for a guy) to getting married vs just living together?

 

[Kalmah]

She'll stop bitching.. "Are you ever going to buy me a ring!!!!??"

 

[nobody554]

Love, proven by a life-long commitment to someone symbolized by a ring.

 

[SlitheryDee]

Nothing. Marriage is an institution that caters to the female urge to settle down and have a steady provider. Now it's perfectly possible for men and women to support themselves independently. Marriage is really no longer needed.

 

[Red Dawn]

Originally posted by: SlitheryDee
Nothing. Marriage is an institution that caters to the female urge to settle down and have a steady provider. Now it's perfectly possible for men and women to support themselves independently. Marriage is really no longer needed.

Not that you'd ever have to worry about it.

 

[Red Squirrel]

My parents keep mentioning how I need to get a GF and get married. Personally, I don't even want to. Maybe later on in life, but not now.

Getting a GF, and getting married means throwing away everything else you live for, all your hobbies, etc. I'm just not ready to do that.

 

[biggestmuff]

I know, create another thread discussing a comment in this thread.

 

[SlitheryDee]

Originally posted by: Red Dawn

Originally posted by: SlitheryDee
Nothing. Marriage is an institution that caters to the female urge to settle down and have a steady provider. Now it's perfectly possible for men and women to support themselves independently. Marriage is really no longer needed.

Not that you'd ever have to worry about it.

Come now old chap. I just don't see how it's much different from living with someone forever, or for whatever time you both deem appropriate. The idea that a senseless ritual and a ring somehow validates two people's love more than anything else seems wrong.

 

[RKS]

Originally posted by: RedSquirrel
My parents keep mentioning how I need to get a GF and get married. Personally, I don't even want to. Maybe later on in life, but not now.

Getting a GF, and getting married means having to move out of the basement.

fixed.

 

[TheVrolok]

Damn, think we have enough cynics around here?

 

[MotF Bane]

Originally posted by: TheVrolok
Damn, think we have enough cynics around here?

Not yet.

 

[theeedude]

I can see why women want to do it. They have a depreciating asset, their attractiveness as a mate that they want to trade for a future revenue stream ASAP.
I can also see why guys do it, p***y

 

[Special K]

Originally posted by: RedSquirrel
Getting a GF, and getting married means throwing away everything else you live for, all your hobbies, etc. I'm just not ready to do that.

Why do you think that? I wouldn't think that would happen until you have kids.

Disclaimer: I don't have kids.

Originally posted by: senseamp
I can see why women want to do it. They have a depreciating asset, their attractiveness as a mate that they want to trade for a future revenue stream ASAP.
I can also see why guys do it, p***y

This isn't the 1950's anymore though. Women are entering the same career fields that men are. In general, women aren't financially dependent on men to survive anymore.

Regarding your comment on men - I thought the prevailing stereotype was that married men never get any

 

[WaTaGuMp]

In California the point is 50%.

 

[Bateluer]

Dual income

 

[BeauJangles]

if you're living with them for an extended period of time, it's probably considered a common law marriage anyway.

 

[ruu]

Well, humans are 1) primarily chemically/biologically monogamous, and 2) extremely social/socially oriented.

Therefore, it follows that marriage is never going to go away because the act of two-by-two coupling is never going to go away, and given how socially oriented we as human animals are, the tendency for social constructs to form in the wake of our animal tendencies will never go away.

That aside, men who are married tend to live longer than men who are not married. The effects become more pronounced the older you are and longer you've been married. I'm pretty sure there was a big thread on this in L&R... if you OT people ever venture over there.

 

[Descartes]

Originally posted by: ruu
Well, humans are 1) primarily chemically/biologically monogamous, and 2) extremely social/socially oriented.

Have any evidence for that first assertion?

Therefore, it follows that marriage is never going to go away because the act of two-by-two coupling is never going to go away, and given how socially oriented we as human animals are, the tendency for social constructs to form in the wake of our animal tendencies will never go away.

That aside, men who are married tend to live longer than men who are not married. The effects become more pronounced the older you are and longer you've been married. I'm pretty sure there was a big thread on this in L&R... if you OT people ever venture over there.

Hmm.

 

[Special K]

Originally posted by: ruu
Well, humans are 1) primarily chemically/biologically monogamous

What is your evidence for this?

I think all of the evolution/biology supporters on here would take the exact opposite stance on this one, at least for men.

 

[TallBill]

Originally posted by: Special K

Originally posted by: ruu
Well, humans are 1) primarily chemically/biologically monogamous

What is your evidence for this?

I think all of the evolution/biology supporters on here would take the exact opposite stance on this one, at least for men.

Yeah, we're definitely meant to have many partners. Getting married shows your civility I guess.

I'm at 4 years now and happy with my decision.

 

[ruu]

Originally posted by: Descartes

Originally posted by: ruu
Well, humans are 1) primarily chemically/biologically monogamous, and 2) extremely social/socially oriented.

Have any evidence for that first assertion?

Originally posted by: Special K

Originally posted by: ruu
Well, humans are 1) primarily chemically/biologically monogamous

What is your evidence for this?

I think all of the evolution/biology supporters on here would take the exact opposite stance on this one, at least for men.

Well, I think I worded it a bit too hastily---I should have put more emphasis on the word "primarily." Humans are PRIMARILY monogamous, but we've actually evolved tendencies to cheat. So what I meant was that we've evolved to live in pairs but to cheat as often as we can get away with it.

This is all lined out in a book titled "The Red Queen," by Matt Ridley. I'm still in the middle of it, so I can't really summarize his arguments in any coherent way, but I encourage everyone to check it out. It's amazing.

 

[Kaido]

Society falls apart when the core family structure falls apart. Look at every single failed nation in history. The family is the core unit of society. When your foundation crumbles, the house falls down.

 

[ruu]

Originally posted by: Descartes
Hmm.

Thanks for that interesting article! I skimmed it really quickly, will read it in more detail in a bit.

I wonder if the conclusions from that study have anything to do with the polygamous tendencies I was trying to explain. :: thinking face ::

Anyway, here's the article that I linked over at L&R when this topic came up:

married men live longer?

It's admittedly dated, though.

 

[RKS]

Originally posted by: BeauJangles
if you're living with them for an extended period of time, it's probably considered a common law marriage anyway.

Common law marriage is not recognized in most states anymore.

 

[Kaido]

Originally posted by: ruu
Anyway, here's the article that I linked over at L&R when this topic came up:

married men live longer?

It's admittedly dated, though.

Well there's a simple answer - man, on his own, eats pork rinds and pizza. Married men typically are fed a better diet