New kind of girl thread: How should I come onto my UPS chick

[Robor]

Originally posted by: Smackem

Originally posted by: AnyMal

Originally posted by: Smackem
I dont have to ask for advice, I just like to hear ppls input. Trust me, I am not gonna make my decision based soley on what you guys say. I don't hit on chicks much while they are at work.

I have more of a chance than any one else on this board. As a matter of fact, given my luck lately I say i got a 20-30% chance of having sex with her within a week.

Judging by this convuluted statement, it's a safe bet you're still a virgin. And will remain one for a looooooong time.

I think its safe to bet that I have been with 5x more women than you. From all over the world, having sex so nasty, it would make larry flint blush. Keep you mouth shut.

Geez you're a total prick. Do you even listen to yourself? You're like the asshole snobby rich guy in a comedy. Good luck with the UPS girl, "Biff". :roll:

 

[NiKeFiDO]

well this would have been interesting if the OP wanst such a dick up front.

 

[grrl]

I'm beginning to doubt all of you naysayers. The OP hasn't responded in two pages so all I can assume is he's already bedded down the UPS girl.

 

[sonz70]

Originally posted by: grrl
I'm beginning to doubt all of you naysayers. The OP hasn't responded in two pages so all I can assume is he's already bedded down the UPS girl.

His daddy probally caught him on the computer past his bedtime and sent him to bed.

 

[thegimp03]

I find it interesting you start the thread by putting people down and basically bragging about yourself. Then you ask for advice about how to hit on a chick? Anyways, older chicks want a guy who's mature and you obviously don't sound it. Sorry.

 

[chrisms]

this will go down in the anals of ATOT history

 

[mugs]

Originally posted by: thegimp03
I find it interesting you start the thread by putting people down and basically bragging about yourself. Then you ask for advice about how to hit on a chick? Anyways, older chicks want a guy who's mature and you obviously don't sound it. Sorry.

What's odd is that the bit about how much money [his parents] was not at all related and it didn't even make any sense that he posted it... It was really an astounding post.

 

[Aquila76]

Hey UPS Lady, I got a big heavy package for you. Handle it with care, and take all the time you want with the delivery.
Just gotta tell ya, I love 'brown' if ya know what I mean...

bowchicka bow bow chicka bow bow boomchicka bow

 

[qaa541]

Just hit it and quit!

 

[Zontor]

Dude!

He really does make 200,000 a year - as soon as he gets the Galleons out of Gringots, he'll show you.....

 

[Doboji]

If you're so successful with women... then it seems to me you oughta be able to figure this one out on your own. Older women are really the same as younger women...

1. Ask her out for coffee
2. Invite her over to make her dinner.
3. Have wild monkey sex for 3 days
4. Hide when you see the UPS truck forevermore.

-Max

 

[Lumathix]

Originally posted by: sixone
Do NOT, I repeat NOT, try to pick up a woman while she is on the job. It makes us feel uncomfortable, because we know that if we say no, you will go complaining to our boss, and embarrass us. And we have to say no, because we have no idea who the fvck you are.

And you're home in the middle of the day, so you can't possibly have a job, or a job we want to know anything about. And you need a job - seriously.

You're goofy enough to answer the doorbell in your underwear - what's that about? Rhetorical question - we don't want to know, really. Just accept that we find it creepy. Don't do it again.

The fact that she was looking at your crotch and laughing is not a good sign. She was not laughing with you.

:thumbsup: lol

 

[sao123]

I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.
I will not insult the OP for being a desperate egotistical masterbating dork.



but i will insult the person with this idea....

Originally posted by: dolph
ok, i totally want to help you, smackem. order something delivered via ups. when it arrives, answer the door in a towel. say you just got out of the shower following a 10-mile run (keep it believable), then invite her in for a second. once she comes in, excuse yourself to your bedroom, but have candles lit and barry white playing in the living room (where you've escorted her). come back out of your room after changing into silk boxers, and have a couple of glasses of white wine with you (get an older friend or a parent to buy it for you). sit down next to her and start playing with her hair while she's talking, then say something about how you "got lost in her eyes." now you can kiss her, and sex is sure to follow. good luck, and don't forget to tell us how it went!

And then she gets fired because UPS trucks have GPS locators in them to show if a driver is goofing off.
***you're a real winner***

 

[CVSiN]

Originally posted by: gigapet

Originally posted by: Smackem
I dont have to ask for advice, I just like to hear ppls input. Trust me, I am not gonna make my decision based soley on what you guys say. I don't hit on chicks much while they are at work.

I have more of a chance than any one else on this board. As a matter of fact, given my luck lately I say i got a 20-30% chance of having sex with her within a week.

LOL. BULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHITTTTTTT

bwahhahahahaa....

Throws big red BS flag on the field...

in your dreams newbie..

 

[azazyel]

Originally posted by: hevnsnt
were you in your tighty-whiteys?

From the sound of it they would be underroos possibly Spider Man.

Do you think this is Skywalker with a new online ego?

 

[CVSiN]

Originally posted by: Smackem
delusional? Maybe no one here has ever:

1. Been attracted to a girl
2. Had the confidence to ask her out and do something with her
3. had sex with her the first or second date.
4. went on to the next one.


This is just what I do. You nerds fall in love with ugly girls. I try to have sex with as many attractive girls as I can. Sorry, Its just my nature.

Escorts / call girls dont count....

 

[sao123]

Edit: Ok so i lied... I will insult the OP.

Originally posted by: Smackem
delusional? Maybe no one here has ever:

1. Been attracted to a girl
2. Had the confidence to ask her out and do something with her
3. had sex with her the first or second date.
4. went on to the next one.


This is just what I do. You nerds fall in love with ugly girls. I try to have sex with as many attractive girls as I can. Sorry, Its just my nature.

delusional? Maybe you have never:

1. Been attracted to a girl
2. fall in love with her
3. treat her like a lady
3. develop a real relationship that lasts longer than 48 hours, and isn't based soley on sex


This is just what real men do. You nerds fall just "use" the girls for sex and then destroy their self worth. I try to love and support one woman as best as I can. Sorry, Its just my nature.

 

[Taggart]

This is the best grilling I have ever seen on ATOT :thumbsup:

 

[CRXican]

sorry I'm in late

this is quality noob material

and if he's really a noob, how does he know about YAGT type code already?

 

[xirtam]

How is this different from every other girl thread in which we all make fun of someone for seeing a girl in real life?

 

[cain]

Originally posted by: CRXican
sorry I'm in late

this is quality noob material

and if he's really a noob, how does he know about YAGT type code already?

i figured it out on my second day. noobs are sharp nowadays

 

[Nutdotnet]

Classic ATOT

I love it!

Now go f8ck yourself Smackem, it's people like you that give humanity a bad name. No one gives a rat's ass about how much you make, how old you are, etc...etc...you're an egotistical little prick.

Hi, my name is NUTDOTNET, I am 24 and I make $34,214 a year.

I'd go on, but I'm too busy talking to hot babes on the internet.

 

[MagicConch]

I think this is some normal guy just posting this (starting this thread) for fun.

 

[Taggart]

Originally posted by: Nutdotnet
Classic ATOT

I love it!

Now go f8ck yourself Smackem, it's people like you that give humanity a bad name. No one gives a rat's ass about how much you make, how old you are, etc...etc...you're an egotistical little prick.

Hi, my name is NUTDOTNET, I am 24 and I make $34,214 a year.

I'd go on, but I'm too busy talking to hot babes on the internet.

and you are 1 away from 5000 posts, congrats

 

[Taggart]

Originally posted by: MagicConch
I think this is some normal guy just posting this (starting this thread) for fun.

Not with all the WoW he plays