Neighbor is building a siege machine

[IEC]

Originally posted by: George P Burdell
Build a stable and prepare a paladin rush.

Oh no, you didn't... damn it, you did!

 

[GoodToGo]

Return his damn lawn mower already....

 

[dawp]

send in the troops(your kids) to capture it and then turn it on him.

 

[BeauJangles]

Originally posted by: Away

Originally posted by: Journer
1) build a catapult and put it in plain view
2) on an old piece of parchment, with an old feather ink pen, write a message about the duality of his character and all the broken promises of a groomed yard an civil children. explain to him that this breakage of the social contract instigates war and if he doe not cease the construction of his war machines then you will be forced to appease him with the full furry of your modern weaponry. make sure to use olde english words like ye and wise and beautiful woman.

if he doesnt get the picture, attack
if he wants a treaty, sign it, then attack when he least expects it

...:yawn; theres my good deed for the day :laugh:

:thumbsup:

I agree this is prime-time for a hilarious medieval war. Go forth, young soldier.

 

[TruePaige]

Originally posted by: Howard

Originally posted by: TruePaige

Originally posted by: Howard

Originally posted by: TruePaige

Originally posted by: Howard

Originally posted by: TruePaige

Originally posted by: Howard

Originally posted by: TruePaige

Originally posted by: Amused

Originally posted by: Lonyo
How will a moat help you against a siege weapon?

okay, a moat and a wall.

But seige > Wall.

He needs flame archers to fire at the long range seige, and hot oil to pour on battering rams.

Hot oil doesn't do anything to battering rams.

It...kills the people using them, hombre. 0.o

You use close range defenses for scaling troops, rams, etc...it's harder to take out long range artillery like trebs though. =(

You can put a roof on a battering ram. I've even seen one with solar panels on it.

Hmm..if that is how you counter than I have two plans.

1) Build a moat.

2) Drop large rocks on the roofs of the battering rams to crush your insolent skulls!

=p

I counter with:

1) quick-detaching pontoons on the ram, effectively making it land and short-water capable

2) a steep roof

Hmm..in that case...I dig the moat right up to the base of the wall, therefore making a ram attack not plausible. I maintain the archers on the wall, and supplement them with some pikemen / swordsmen to keep scaling attacks at bay.

I don't see a way to breach the walls over the moat unless I have access to gunpowder or a similar explosive. Thus, I stay at range and continue to lob big rocks at you with my ginormous trebuchets until a wall has been breached at ground level.

The only option (if I can keep you at range with longbows) is to sit around my village until I starve. =p

 

[Snapster]

Siege weapons are borked, send in the steam giants!

or 100 slingers for the lulz

 

[pray4mojo]

fortify some musketmen. make sure to build a city wall to raise your defenses 50%.

 

[bunnyfubbles]

quick, develop Greek fire to use in defense!

 

[PricklyPete]

As long as you have not raped and pillaged his home...you're probably alright.

 

[SSSnail]

You gotta amp up your research and build steam giant, a single steam giant will lay that contraption to waste.

 

[DisgruntledVirus]

Originally posted by: Howard

Originally posted by: TruePaige

Originally posted by: Howard

Originally posted by: TruePaige

Originally posted by: Amused

Originally posted by: Lonyo
How will a moat help you against a siege weapon?

okay, a moat and a wall.

But seige > Wall.

He needs flame archers to fire at the long range seige, and hot oil to pour on battering rams.

Hot oil doesn't do anything to battering rams.

It...kills the people using them, hombre. 0.o

You use close range defenses for scaling troops, rams, etc...it's harder to take out long range artillery like trebs though. =(

You can put a roof on a battering ram. I've even seen one with solar panels on it.

Or, get highly flammable oil, then take your fire archers and shoot at it. Double win by killing people, and burning the equipment.

 

[oddyager]

I would probably start queue-ing more kids and ZERG him with them.

 

[skace]

The flaw is trying to build defense against siege warfare. The only defense against siege is an offensive force. The time to attack is now.

 

[ViviTheMage]

hahaha!

 

[rivan]

Thread = win.

 

[SpunkyJones]

Trojan Horse, STAT!

 

[jjanders]

Originally posted by: oddyager
I would probably start queue-ing more kids and ZERG him with them.

This thread rules

 

[Mr Pickles]

Originally posted by: Journer
1) build a catapult and put it in plain view
2) on an old piece of parchment, with an old feather ink pen, write a message about the duality of his character and all the broken promises of a groomed yard an civil children. explain to him that this breakage of the social contract instigates war and if he doe not cease the construction of his war machines then you will be forced to appease him with the full furry of your modern weaponry. make sure to use olde english words like ye and wise and beautiful woman.

if he doesnt get the picture, attack
if he wants a treaty, sign it, then attack when he least expects it

...:yawn; theres my good deed for the day :laugh:

I declare this reply the most hilariful!

OP - make sure to seal the letter with your family crest wax imprint or they will not take you seriously.

Originally posted by: JEDI

Originally posted by: Amused
It's a trebuchet...

http://pics.bbzzdd.com/users/Amused/treb.JPG

Is invasion imminent?

Should I start building a moat and a wall?

live role playing Age of Empires II FTW!!!

moat wont help vs Trebs. they have a range of 15. unless u build your moat 16 from your house. in which case he'll just ferry it over w/a dragon boat (plus supporting firepower to protect the Treb.)

hope u have lots of knights. or cheat, and outrange him w/your 135mm howitzer.

Lightning Bolt! Lightning Bolt!

 

[XxPrOdiGyxX]

Build a moat. It won't help but it will be cool. Or you can send him a tribute as a peace offering.

 

[venkman]

You need to Blockade his driveway so he cannot purchase the materials needed to finish the weapon. As a bonus, you will also starve him to surrender.

 

[CPA]

Originally posted by: EGGO
If I remember my strategy from Civilization 4, you can take on those catapults with tanks.

Build a tank.

Or War Elephants.

Are you near a zoo, by chance?

 

[sdifox]

Sabotage is the name of the game.

 

[MaxDepth]

Originally posted by: venkman
You need to Blockade his driveway so he cannot purchase the materials needed to finish the weapon. As a bonus, you will also starve him to surrender.

How is your iron ore production going? I'd say you need to step up your invention queue and start building mortars.

PS - You already discoverd 'trigonometry' right? Otherwise, you might shoot your own house.

 

[Linflas]

"Cherchez le vache eh English?" "Fire!"

 

[venkman]

Before you attack, remember to classify the siege machine as a weapon of mass destruction, that way your own family and the rest of the neighborhood won't protest.