Captante
Lifer
- Oct 20, 2003
- 30,353
- 10,876
- 136
Actually the first thing I thought was the kid most likely wishes his parents went to the trouble of giving him a nice birthday party.
Wether thats the specific reason for the nasty comment or not, one thing for sure is that the comment was made to make the kid feel superior to your son for some reason ... the best thing to do would be to explain this to him.
THEN go play some of his favorite game with him!
Ricemarine
Lifer
- Sep 10, 2004
- 10,507
- 0
- 0
moshquerade
No Lifer
- Nov 1, 2001
- 61,504
- 12
- 56
what is it with these extravagant birthday parties? it seems the parents are just trying to keep up with the Joneses.
my brother and wife have fell into this cesspool. when one of their kids turned 6 last year and they threw an "American Idol" birthday party. They hired a guy to come DJ at the party so all the kids could get up on stage and try out for American Idol.
and yes, all their parents were invited so it turned into an party catering to the adults too. they had to buy tons of food and drink.
and usually these parties entail inviting every single kid in their kid's class (and their parents), because some stupid kid's parents started that idiotic idea b/c they didn't want to "hurt anyone's feelings".
not really trying to get on you OP, but i just see these "kid's" birthday parties getting waaaaay out of control. what happened to just inviting a few kids over for ice cream, cake, a game of pin the tail on the donkey, and them sending them on their way?
oh yeh, there's more: my niece had to leave early last Easter b/c some kid had invited her to a sushi birthday party and the invitation said, "formal wear" so she had to get all dressed up (Mom bought her a new dress for the event) and her parents were going to drive her 1 hr to this party at some upscale restaurant.
my brother and wife have fell into this cesspool. when one of their kids turned 6 last year and they threw an "American Idol" birthday party. They hired a guy to come DJ at the party so all the kids could get up on stage and try out for American Idol.
and yes, all their parents were invited so it turned into an party catering to the adults too. they had to buy tons of food and drink.
and usually these parties entail inviting every single kid in their kid's class (and their parents), because some stupid kid's parents started that idiotic idea b/c they didn't want to "hurt anyone's feelings".
not really trying to get on you OP, but i just see these "kid's" birthday parties getting waaaaay out of control. what happened to just inviting a few kids over for ice cream, cake, a game of pin the tail on the donkey, and them sending them on their way?
oh yeh, there's more: my niece had to leave early last Easter b/c some kid had invited her to a sushi birthday party and the invitation said, "formal wear" so she had to get all dressed up (Mom bought her a new dress for the event) and her parents were going to drive her 1 hr to this party at some upscale restaurant.
Originally posted by: moshquerade
what is it with these extravagant birthday parties? it seems the parents are just trying to keep up with the Joneses.
my brother and wife have fell into this cesspool. when one of their kids turned 6 last year and they threw an "American Idol" birthday party. They hired a guy to come DJ at the party so all the kids could get up on stage and try out for American Idol.
and yes, all their parents were invited so it turned into an party catering to the adults too. they had to buy tons of food and drink.
and usually these parties entail inviting every single kid in their kid's class (and their parents), because some stupid kid's parents started that idiotic idea b/c they didn't want to "hurt anyone's feelings".
not really trying to get on you OP, but i just see these "kid's" birthday parties getting waaaaay out of control. what happened to just inviting a few kids over for ice cream, cake, a game of pin the tail on the donkey, and them sending them on their way?
oh yeh, there's more: my niece had to leave early last Easter b/c some kid had invited her to a sushi birthday party and the invitation said, "formal wear" so she had to get all dressed up (Mom bought her a new dress for the event) and her parents were going to drive her 1 hr to this party at some upscale restaurant.
it was at our Gyms swimming pool, they have a nice floating obstacle course. kids loved it. it was not adult centered at all.
and i don't do this often. like i said in the OP, this is the first party with more than 3 or 4 friends he's had in 5 yrs or so.
it cost a lot because we also paid for dinner for about 45 people.
Cdubneeddeal
Diamond Member
- Oct 22, 2003
- 7,473
- 3
- 81
Sounds like the kid was jealous. Sounds like you and the misses put on a great part for the kids and the adults. Hats off to you.
I would be quite frank with the kid, and let him know that you are being frank; make it seems as an exception and not your normal behavior, for emphatic purposes...
Tell him that frankly, you are disappointed, and don't know what you should say. tell him that you worked very hard for the party, and had hoped that he would like it.
tell him that sometimes we hit these walls. we are feeling good and happy, kings of the world, and then bam..some kid says something, a truck crashes into your new car, a baby starts crying during your movie, or someone leaves the last of the ice cream out and it all melts so we can't enjoy the last of it (to the missus down the hall: "THAT's THE LAST TIME I BETTER SAY THAT DEAR:|" ).
then ask him why he thought the party sucked.
you need to get a true biased answer from him so that he can feel confident and selfish about his answer. you want him to say what HE WANTs to think (perhaps he is still dwelling on the thoughts of others) in a very caressingly inquisitive manner so he says the truth.
then you simply make him aweare of what the truth is, and repeat back to him what he just said.
and OP, if this thread is about about a girl, well..whatever...
Tell him that frankly, you are disappointed, and don't know what you should say. tell him that you worked very hard for the party, and had hoped that he would like it.
tell him that sometimes we hit these walls. we are feeling good and happy, kings of the world, and then bam..some kid says something, a truck crashes into your new car, a baby starts crying during your movie, or someone leaves the last of the ice cream out and it all melts so we can't enjoy the last of it (to the missus down the hall: "THAT's THE LAST TIME I BETTER SAY THAT DEAR:|" ).
then ask him why he thought the party sucked.
you need to get a true biased answer from him so that he can feel confident and selfish about his answer. you want him to say what HE WANTs to think (perhaps he is still dwelling on the thoughts of others) in a very caressingly inquisitive manner so he says the truth.
then you simply make him aweare of what the truth is, and repeat back to him what he just said.
and OP, if this thread is about about a girl, well..whatever...
moshquerade
No Lifer
- Nov 1, 2001
- 61,504
- 12
- 56
will you spend that much on next year's party? what i'm wondering is will this party set a precedent?Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Originally posted by: moshquerade
what is it with these extravagant birthday parties? it seems the parents are just trying to keep up with the Joneses.
my brother and wife have fell into this cesspool. when one of their kids turned 6 last year and they threw an "American Idol" birthday party. They hired a guy to come DJ at the party so all the kids could get up on stage and try out for American Idol.
and yes, all their parents were invited so it turned into an party catering to the adults too. they had to buy tons of food and drink.
and usually these parties entail inviting every single kid in their kid's class (and their parents), because some stupid kid's parents started that idiotic idea b/c they didn't want to "hurt anyone's feelings".
not really trying to get on you OP, but i just see these "kid's" birthday parties getting waaaaay out of control. what happened to just inviting a few kids over for ice cream, cake, a game of pin the tail on the donkey, and them sending them on their way?
oh yeh, there's more: my niece had to leave early last Easter b/c some kid had invited her to a sushi birthday party and the invitation said, "formal wear" so she had to get all dressed up (Mom bought her a new dress for the event) and her parents were going to drive her 1 hr to this party at some upscale restaurant.
it was at our Gyms swimming pool, they have a nice floating obstacle course. kids loved it. it was not adult centered at all.
and i don't do this often. like i said in the OP, this is the first party with more than 3 or 4 friends he's had in 5 yrs or so.
it cost a lot because we also paid for dinner for about 45 people.
i'm really not trying to pick on you. i just think kid's birthday parties are out of control.
thecoolnessrune
Diamond Member
- Jun 8, 2005
- 9,673
- 583
- 126
When kids would come up to me with the same complaints I always told them that there will always be people who are worthless to you. Those kinds of people are the perfect example. Ignore them and always realise you're far better then they'll ever be, and don't even give them the time of day.
Originally posted by: moshquerade
will you spend that much on next year's party? what i'm wondering is will this party set a precedent?Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Originally posted by: moshquerade
what is it with these extravagant birthday parties? it seems the parents are just trying to keep up with the Joneses.
my brother and wife have fell into this cesspool. when one of their kids turned 6 last year and they threw an "American Idol" birthday party. They hired a guy to come DJ at the party so all the kids could get up on stage and try out for American Idol.
and yes, all their parents were invited so it turned into an party catering to the adults too. they had to buy tons of food and drink.
and usually these parties entail inviting every single kid in their kid's class (and their parents), because some stupid kid's parents started that idiotic idea b/c they didn't want to "hurt anyone's feelings".
not really trying to get on you OP, but i just see these "kid's" birthday parties getting waaaaay out of control. what happened to just inviting a few kids over for ice cream, cake, a game of pin the tail on the donkey, and them sending them on their way?
oh yeh, there's more: my niece had to leave early last Easter b/c some kid had invited her to a sushi birthday party and the invitation said, "formal wear" so she had to get all dressed up (Mom bought her a new dress for the event) and her parents were going to drive her 1 hr to this party at some upscale restaurant.
it was at our Gyms swimming pool, they have a nice floating obstacle course. kids loved it. it was not adult centered at all.
and i don't do this often. like i said in the OP, this is the first party with more than 3 or 4 friends he's had in 5 yrs or so.
it cost a lot because we also paid for dinner for about 45 people.
i'm really not trying to pick on you. i just think kid's birthday parties are out of control.
seriosly..$600 is a LOT of money...
I used to be THRILLED when I actually got a cake...
God dammit, you people READ THE ARTICLE I LINKED.
I'm right and you all agree with me, but no one's saying it 'cause no one read the damn article!
Go! Now!
Originally posted by: Goosemaster
Originally posted by: moshquerade
will you spend that much on next year's party? what i'm wondering is will this party set a precedent?Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Originally posted by: moshquerade
what is it with these extravagant birthday parties? it seems the parents are just trying to keep up with the Joneses.
my brother and wife have fell into this cesspool. when one of their kids turned 6 last year and they threw an "American Idol" birthday party. They hired a guy to come DJ at the party so all the kids could get up on stage and try out for American Idol.
and yes, all their parents were invited so it turned into an party catering to the adults too. they had to buy tons of food and drink.
and usually these parties entail inviting every single kid in their kid's class (and their parents), because some stupid kid's parents started that idiotic idea b/c they didn't want to "hurt anyone's feelings".
not really trying to get on you OP, but i just see these "kid's" birthday parties getting waaaaay out of control. what happened to just inviting a few kids over for ice cream, cake, a game of pin the tail on the donkey, and them sending them on their way?
oh yeh, there's more: my niece had to leave early last Easter b/c some kid had invited her to a sushi birthday party and the invitation said, "formal wear" so she had to get all dressed up (Mom bought her a new dress for the event) and her parents were going to drive her 1 hr to this party at some upscale restaurant.
it was at our Gyms swimming pool, they have a nice floating obstacle course. kids loved it. it was not adult centered at all.
and i don't do this often. like i said in the OP, this is the first party with more than 3 or 4 friends he's had in 5 yrs or so.
it cost a lot because we also paid for dinner for about 45 people.
i'm really not trying to pick on you. i just think kid's birthday parties are out of control.
seriosly..$600 is a LOT of money...
I used to be THRILLED when I actually got a cake...
my birthday is january 7. i never ever got a birthday party. seriously, 12 yrs of childhood that i remember well (6 yrs to 18) i never once got a birthday party. my parents use to take me to the department store on my birthday and tell me to choose a present. have any of you ever gone shopping for a decent toy 2 weeks after christmas.
so, i know what it means for my parents to forget my birthday.
i've always done something for him.
Mosh
hey, no problem. i don't take your statements personally.
the way i figure it, this might be the last time i can do something like this for him. as he gets into middle school and then high school, i figure he's gonna want more parties that are friends centered and less parent involvement.
I was about to say the same thing. When I was a kid, my birthdays consisted of a cake, a few snacks and soda, a handful of friends and some birthday hats. That was it. I didn't even get presents! And I loved it!
My colleague rented out a movie theater and invited his daughter's entire class. These parties just seem overly elaborate. I know you guys love your kids, but when does it become spoiling?
The other kid was a prick, no doubt. But I know how my parents would have reacted to this situation. They'd say, "We just threw you a $600 party! You had fun, but you're upset because of what someone else says? If you're so upset, then next year, we don't have to have a party at all." I'd cry my eyes out and by the next day, all is better.
:roll:
ya, that really applies to my situation. OH WAIT, no it doesn't. way to make a whole HOST of assumptions.
Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Originally posted by: Goosemaster
Originally posted by: moshquerade
will you spend that much on next year's party? what i'm wondering is will this party set a precedent?Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Originally posted by: moshquerade
what is it with these extravagant birthday parties? it seems the parents are just trying to keep up with the Joneses.
my brother and wife have fell into this cesspool. when one of their kids turned 6 last year and they threw an "American Idol" birthday party. They hired a guy to come DJ at the party so all the kids could get up on stage and try out for American Idol.
and yes, all their parents were invited so it turned into an party catering to the adults too. they had to buy tons of food and drink.
and usually these parties entail inviting every single kid in their kid's class (and their parents), because some stupid kid's parents started that idiotic idea b/c they didn't want to "hurt anyone's feelings".
not really trying to get on you OP, but i just see these "kid's" birthday parties getting waaaaay out of control. what happened to just inviting a few kids over for ice cream, cake, a game of pin the tail on the donkey, and them sending them on their way?
oh yeh, there's more: my niece had to leave early last Easter b/c some kid had invited her to a sushi birthday party and the invitation said, "formal wear" so she had to get all dressed up (Mom bought her a new dress for the event) and her parents were going to drive her 1 hr to this party at some upscale restaurant.
it was at our Gyms swimming pool, they have a nice floating obstacle course. kids loved it. it was not adult centered at all.
and i don't do this often. like i said in the OP, this is the first party with more than 3 or 4 friends he's had in 5 yrs or so.
it cost a lot because we also paid for dinner for about 45 people.
i'm really not trying to pick on you. i just think kid's birthday parties are out of control.
seriosly..$600 is a LOT of money...
I used to be THRILLED when I actually got a cake...
my birthday is january 7. i never ever got a birthday party. seriously, 12 yrs of childhood that i remember well (6 yrs to 18) i never once got a birthday party. my parents use to take me to the department store on my birthday and tell me to choose a present. have any of you ever gone shopping for a decent toy 2 weeks after christmas.
so, i know what it means for my parents to forget my birthday.
i've always done something for him.
Mosh
hey, no problem. i don't take your statements personally.
the way i figure it, this might be the last time i can do something like this for him. as he gets into middle school and then high school, i figure he's gonna want more parties that are friends centered and less parent involvement.
I would say focus on what would make HIM happy and not YOU happy.
Having you be an overzealous fool won't fix anything
in the end they'll remember the little things most so don't worry about the grandiose next time.
Cdubneeddeal
Diamond Member
- Oct 22, 2003
- 7,473
- 3
- 81
Originally posted by: Goosemaster
Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Originally posted by: Goosemaster
Originally posted by: moshquerade
will you spend that much on next year's party? what i'm wondering is will this party set a precedent?Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Originally posted by: moshquerade
what is it with these extravagant birthday parties? it seems the parents are just trying to keep up with the Joneses.
my brother and wife have fell into this cesspool. when one of their kids turned 6 last year and they threw an "American Idol" birthday party. They hired a guy to come DJ at the party so all the kids could get up on stage and try out for American Idol.
and yes, all their parents were invited so it turned into an party catering to the adults too. they had to buy tons of food and drink.
and usually these parties entail inviting every single kid in their kid's class (and their parents), because some stupid kid's parents started that idiotic idea b/c they didn't want to "hurt anyone's feelings".
not really trying to get on you OP, but i just see these "kid's" birthday parties getting waaaaay out of control. what happened to just inviting a few kids over for ice cream, cake, a game of pin the tail on the donkey, and them sending them on their way?
oh yeh, there's more: my niece had to leave early last Easter b/c some kid had invited her to a sushi birthday party and the invitation said, "formal wear" so she had to get all dressed up (Mom bought her a new dress for the event) and her parents were going to drive her 1 hr to this party at some upscale restaurant.
it was at our Gyms swimming pool, they have a nice floating obstacle course. kids loved it. it was not adult centered at all.
and i don't do this often. like i said in the OP, this is the first party with more than 3 or 4 friends he's had in 5 yrs or so.
it cost a lot because we also paid for dinner for about 45 people.
i'm really not trying to pick on you. i just think kid's birthday parties are out of control.
seriosly..$600 is a LOT of money...
I used to be THRILLED when I actually got a cake...
my birthday is january 7. i never ever got a birthday party. seriously, 12 yrs of childhood that i remember well (6 yrs to 18) i never once got a birthday party. my parents use to take me to the department store on my birthday and tell me to choose a present. have any of you ever gone shopping for a decent toy 2 weeks after christmas.
so, i know what it means for my parents to forget my birthday.
i've always done something for him.
Mosh
hey, no problem. i don't take your statements personally.
the way i figure it, this might be the last time i can do something like this for him. as he gets into middle school and then high school, i figure he's gonna want more parties that are friends centered and less parent involvement.
I would say focus on what would make HIM happy and not YOU happy.
Having you be an overzealous fool won't fix anything
in the end they'll remember the little things most so don't worry about the grandiose next time.
It kind of goes hand in hand though. Making a kid smile and knowing that you had every involvement in that happiness will in turn make him happy as well. Ignore me, getting a little emotional..
Originally posted by: Goosemaster
Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Originally posted by: Goosemaster
Originally posted by: moshquerade
will you spend that much on next year's party? what i'm wondering is will this party set a precedent?Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Originally posted by: moshquerade
what is it with these extravagant birthday parties? it seems the parents are just trying to keep up with the Joneses.
my brother and wife have fell into this cesspool. when one of their kids turned 6 last year and they threw an "American Idol" birthday party. They hired a guy to come DJ at the party so all the kids could get up on stage and try out for American Idol.
and yes, all their parents were invited so it turned into an party catering to the adults too. they had to buy tons of food and drink.
and usually these parties entail inviting every single kid in their kid's class (and their parents), because some stupid kid's parents started that idiotic idea b/c they didn't want to "hurt anyone's feelings".
not really trying to get on you OP, but i just see these "kid's" birthday parties getting waaaaay out of control. what happened to just inviting a few kids over for ice cream, cake, a game of pin the tail on the donkey, and them sending them on their way?
oh yeh, there's more: my niece had to leave early last Easter b/c some kid had invited her to a sushi birthday party and the invitation said, "formal wear" so she had to get all dressed up (Mom bought her a new dress for the event) and her parents were going to drive her 1 hr to this party at some upscale restaurant.
it was at our Gyms swimming pool, they have a nice floating obstacle course. kids loved it. it was not adult centered at all.
and i don't do this often. like i said in the OP, this is the first party with more than 3 or 4 friends he's had in 5 yrs or so.
it cost a lot because we also paid for dinner for about 45 people.
i'm really not trying to pick on you. i just think kid's birthday parties are out of control.
seriosly..$600 is a LOT of money...
I used to be THRILLED when I actually got a cake...
my birthday is january 7. i never ever got a birthday party. seriously, 12 yrs of childhood that i remember well (6 yrs to 18) i never once got a birthday party. my parents use to take me to the department store on my birthday and tell me to choose a present. have any of you ever gone shopping for a decent toy 2 weeks after christmas.
so, i know what it means for my parents to forget my birthday.
i've always done something for him.
Mosh
hey, no problem. i don't take your statements personally.
the way i figure it, this might be the last time i can do something like this for him. as he gets into middle school and then high school, i figure he's gonna want more parties that are friends centered and less parent involvement.
I would say focus on what would make HIM happy and not YOU happy.
Having you be an overzealous fool won't fix anything
in the end they'll remember the little things most so don't worry about the grandiose next time.
and if you are going to try and give me advice, have the courtesy to read the OP.
you know very little about me and my relationship with my son. you implying that i did this just to make myself happy is a huge assumption that isn't supported by my statements.
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