Originally posted by: BigDonJohnson
Originally posted by: yllus
If you tell her you're willing to wait, you'll become her emotional tampon and have to listen to all her worries and crap minus the sex - don't go there.
Best to pretend that she never said that she wasn't looking for a relationship. Don't press the issue, but carry on as the more-than-friends you're acting like right now and I give you odds that you'll end up in a relationship anyways.
Excellent advice. I think that's probably the best way to go about it. And yeah, tonight I'll slip a hand down and see what's up.
You couldn't be serious; could you? :roll: Reading more of your posts has made more skeptical of your story or request for advice. However, if you're really serious, read my response below.
Originally posted by: BigDonJohnson
Ok, so we work together.
I've always had a thing for her and recently broke up with the gf of 3years. We started talking at work a lot, going out for lunch, etc.
Then we started talking on the phone and text messaging eachother crazily (400 in like 5 days).
The last 3 days she has been here til atleast 3 or 4 AM.
Now today we talked about how she wasnt really looking for a relationship, and didnt want to hurt me or lead me on. I told her I had feelings for her but she never said if she had any for me. She always said she still wants to cuddle.
Now she is on her way over (40 min drive) to watch a movie.
**EDIT** We havent messed around or anything, we just sit and talk and talk. So nothing has went down yet.
WTF is up?! Should I tell her I am willing to wait (I really like her) or what?
Ugh! I can't understand guys wanting to jump into a new relationship so quick before even getting over their long-term relationships. Deal with [recovery from] your long-term relationship before worrying about a relationship with a co-worker! Frankly speaking, even in the best circumstances, this type of relationship almost
never lasts. How much then one with a co-worker, where the dynamics are so different and complex? You're playing with fire, in my opinion, because like it or not--this is going to be a fling. It won't last at all. If you still want it, make sure both of you have a mutual agreement on where you want this to go. There's no question that she is interested in you, but you shouldn't make any advances. Allow her initiate anything because once again this is the workplace. You're subject to charges of sexual harassment, especially in your position of power (albeit different departments), if you aren't careful. A woman tells you no and you believe the no to really mean yes. You act upon it and end up facing a lawsuit and discharge from work. As much as I'm certain that she does have interest in you, respect her words and don't move fast. Do not read in between the lines. And again, remember that this in all likelihood will just be a fling or possible tension between the two of you at the end. My general advice is no relationship at workplace, but that's just me.