Men: What went wrong?

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maziwanka

Lifer
Jul 4, 2000
10,419
1
0
Originally posted by: shortylickens
I'll try to acknowledge the depth of your feelings here and not be crass.
I think what you really believe is that marriage shouldnt be just a contract.

But I consider myself a realist and I think that it really is.
Seriously, the way things are in the U.S. you dont HAVE to be married to be in love, or live together, or make babies.
So why do it?
The security or the commitment?
Again let us go back to the divorce rate and god-know how many people are in a marriage and not happy.
Its seems to me there is no commitment anymore. Its so damn easy to get out of it.
I hear folks on AT argue all time, marriage is a bond for life and all sorts of other good stuff. But if so many people really dont believe it anymore (and its obvious to me they dont) then why do we keep doing it at all?

The happiest couple I know never even considered getting married. They acknowledged their love and left it at that. They know that marriage really is just a contract and everything else is not promised, expressed or implied. Its assumed.
And for those of us who had time in the military, assume is a dirty word.

That couple I know has a 12 year old boy and they are all very happy. I suspect its because they never deluded themselves with soap-opera fantasies.

Thats what I want. I just want to be in love. And I believe it could make me happy. But I also know that the average girl wont settle for that. Sooner or later she'll want commitment. Which (like I said above) is bullshiat. Because a piece of paper signed by a judge doesnt make you any more commited. You have it in you whether you sign or not. That paper isnt magic, it doesnt solve problems or make people more mature.

i think you and i have very similar views.

marriage shouldn't be something forced simply as a sign of commitment. you're absolutely right that a piece of paper doesn't make you any more committed. i think the situation with the couple you mentioned above is fantastic and that if i did know them, i would never suggest marriage to the two of them. people can express love and commitment in many ways.

on the other hand, my best friends are getting married. their decision to do so wasn't the result of pressure for commitment (even though they were dating for like 9 years). it was a manifestation of their commitment to each other.
 

jagec

Lifer
Apr 30, 2004
24,442
6
81
Originally posted by: shortylickens
Yes but every time one of us hateful bastards makes a comment about prenups we get a long lecture from the "love for life" crew about how we shouldnt be getting married if we need a prenup.

Well it's true. If you need a prenup, just live together, don't get married. Marriage is for those stubborn bastards who stake their integrity to every piece of paper they sign, and as such they'll go to ridiculous lengths to fulfill a contract. I wholeheartedly approve of those types of people:)

IMHO civil courts should perform civil unions, with whatever tax breaks those entail; marriage should be left to people who understand the import of what they're getting into, and will stick to it.
 

bleeb

Lifer
Feb 3, 2000
10,868
0
0
This is the sort of thing that one says when they don't get any poon. Only then will you understand the power of the "poon" and it's complete and total control over the heterosexual male.
 

moshquerade

No Lifer
Nov 1, 2001
61,713
12
56
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Please, you can't get a date now, what makes you think such rants will make you more attractive to women ?
:iamwithher:

OP, sthu

 

GasX

Lifer
Feb 8, 2001
29,033
6
81
Originally posted by: bennylong
Originally posted by: maziwanka
Originally posted by: bennylong
Originally posted by: shortylickens
Originally posted by: ThaGrandCow
Also: if you're worried about your future wife raping you in the courtroom for alimony, sign a prenup. Ignorance = stupidity, and if she loves you enough to marry you "for life" then it shouldn't be a problem for her to sign the paper "just in case"
Yes but every time one of us hateful bastards makes a comment about prenups we get a long lecture from the "love for life" crew about how we shouldnt be getting married if we need a prenup.

My attitude is: They wouldnt exist if we werent losing half our marrieges to divorce.
You can cry maturity all you want. If people were really mature we wouldnt have divorce and prenups would never have existed.
At least the prenup acknowledges human weakness and imperfection. Which is funny because our whole country is based on that. A little thing called checks and balances.


I think every sensible person today realize that marriage is nothing more than a finanical contract, and those that don't protect their financial contract by getting a pre-nup will get up getting screwed. Look at Paul McCarthy! Love? Dude is going to lose Hundreds of millions for 2 years of marriage.

this kind of attitude does make me sad.

marriage isn't just a financial contract.

Why get married then? You can do everything you can as a couple without being married.
You will die alone.

 
L

Lola


whoever thinks a wife, your supposed equal, is EXPECTED to do this for you, should get yourself a maid and a hooker and be done with it because you will never understand marriage or what it means.

It is a funny article and look into our sad yet typical past of male dominance in marriage and relationships.
I am by no means a femi-natzi, however, i do think that marriage should be more than man and his "wife" to answer to his every beck and call or whim. For an example, in my relationship, i accept some of the typical roles of a woman and my husband as the "man" in the relationship, but we are both willing to move out of that mindset here and there to take on the others role when need be.. i.e... he will do the dishes, I will take out the trash, etc.

A woman should want to make her husband happy as should he want to please her. Not beacuse it is expected, but because he/she wants to.

There are still women out there that think that article could have been written two weeks ago and follow it to a T, but her husband must be quite a "work" to expect that every single day.

sorry... that might not make sense, i am just a little annoyed that some on here think or wish they could find a woman like that.
 

krunchykrome

Lifer
Dec 28, 2003
13,413
1
0
Originally posted by: LolaWiz

whoever thinks a wife, your supposed equal, is EXPECTED to do this for you, should get yourself a maid and a hooker and be done with it because you will never understand marriage or what it means.

It is a funny article and look into our sad yet typical past of male dominance in marriage and relationships.
I am by no means a femi-natzi, however, i do think that marriage should be more than man and his "wife" to answer to his every beck and call or whim. For an example, in my relationship, i accept some of the typical roles of a woman and my husband as the "man" in the relationship, but we are both willing to move out of that mindset here and there to take on the others role when need be.. i.e... he will do the dishes, I will take out the trash, etc.

A woman should want to make her husband happy as should he want to please her. Not beacuse it is expected, but because he/she wants to.

There are still women out there that think that article could have been written two weeks ago and follow it to a T, but her husband must be quite a "work" to expect that every single day.

sorry... that might not make sense, i am just a little annoyed that some on here think or wish they could find a woman like that.


Weren't you recently married?

Lets see what happens in 5 years ;)
 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,167
2,399
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Originally posted by: LolaWiz

whoever thinks a wife, your supposed equal, is EXPECTED to do this for you, should get yourself a maid and a hooker and be done with it because you will never understand marriage or what it means.

It is a funny article and look into our sad yet typical past of male dominance in marriage and relationships.
I am by no means a femi-natzi, however, i do think that marriage should be more than man and his "wife" to answer to his every beck and call or whim. For an example, in my relationship, i accept some of the typical roles of a woman and my husband as the "man" in the relationship, but we are both willing to move out of that mindset here and there to take on the others role when need be.. i.e... he will do the dishes, I will take out the trash, etc.

A woman should want to make her husband happy as should he want to please her. Not beacuse it is expected, but because he/she wants to.

There are still women out there that think that article could have been written two weeks ago and follow it to a T, but her husband must be quite a "work" to expect that every single day.

sorry... that might not make sense, i am just a little annoyed that some on here think or wish they could find a woman like that.


please, even an old used up pig like me can do better than the likes of bennylong.
 
L

Lola

Originally posted by: krunchykrome
Originally posted by: LolaWiz

whoever thinks a wife, your supposed equal, is EXPECTED to do this for you, should get yourself a maid and a hooker and be done with it because you will never understand marriage or what it means.

It is a funny article and look into our sad yet typical past of male dominance in marriage and relationships.
I am by no means a femi-natzi, however, i do think that marriage should be more than man and his "wife" to answer to his every beck and call or whim. For an example, in my relationship, i accept some of the typical roles of a woman and my husband as the "man" in the relationship, but we are both willing to move out of that mindset here and there to take on the others role when need be.. i.e... he will do the dishes, I will take out the trash, etc.

A woman should want to make her husband happy as should he want to please her. Not beacuse it is expected, but because he/she wants to.

There are still women out there that think that article could have been written two weeks ago and follow it to a T, but her husband must be quite a "work" to expect that every single day.

sorry... that might not make sense, i am just a little annoyed that some on here think or wish they could find a woman like that.


Weren't you recently married?

Lets see what happens in 5 years ;)

we were married last year, however, we have been practucally married for over 5 years prior to that.
 

Hyperblaze

Lifer
May 31, 2001
10,028
1
81
Originally posted by: Geekbabe
Originally posted by: LolaWiz

whoever thinks a wife, your supposed equal, is EXPECTED to do this for you, should get yourself a maid and a hooker and be done with it because you will never understand marriage or what it means.

It is a funny article and look into our sad yet typical past of male dominance in marriage and relationships.
I am by no means a femi-natzi, however, i do think that marriage should be more than man and his "wife" to answer to his every beck and call or whim. For an example, in my relationship, i accept some of the typical roles of a woman and my husband as the "man" in the relationship, but we are both willing to move out of that mindset here and there to take on the others role when need be.. i.e... he will do the dishes, I will take out the trash, etc.

A woman should want to make her husband happy as should he want to please her. Not beacuse it is expected, but because he/she wants to.

There are still women out there that think that article could have been written two weeks ago and follow it to a T, but her husband must be quite a "work" to expect that every single day.

sorry... that might not make sense, i am just a little annoyed that some on here think or wish they could find a woman like that.


please, even an old used up pig like me can do better than the likes of bennylong.


last i checked, you already have with red.
 

GuitarDaddy

Lifer
Nov 9, 2004
11,465
1
0
How does a guy thats never had a date in 30yrs get used and abused by women:confused:

Methinks the OP would be in hog heaven if he could get used and abused:)
 

krunchykrome

Lifer
Dec 28, 2003
13,413
1
0
Originally posted by: bennylong
Originally posted by: shortylickens
Originally posted by: ThaGrandCow
Also: if you're worried about your future wife raping you in the courtroom for alimony, sign a prenup. Ignorance = stupidity, and if she loves you enough to marry you "for life" then it shouldn't be a problem for her to sign the paper "just in case"
Yes but every time one of us hateful bastards makes a comment about prenups we get a long lecture from the "love for life" crew about how we shouldnt be getting married if we need a prenup.

My attitude is: They wouldnt exist if we werent losing half our marrieges to divorce.
You can cry maturity all you want. If people were really mature we wouldnt have divorce and prenups would never have existed.
At least the prenup acknowledges human weakness and imperfection. Which is funny because our whole country is based on that. A little thing called checks and balances.


I think every sensible person today realize that marriage is nothing more than a finanical contract, and those that don't protect their financial contract by getting a pre-nup will get up getting screwed. Look at Paul McCarthy! Love? Dude is going to lose Hundreds of millions for 2 years of marriage.


Yea, well that mentality might be the reason you're a virgin.
 
Feb 10, 2000
30,029
66
91
Great - a 33-year-old virgin is posting an indictment of the entire female sex because he wants to rationalize the fact that he doesn't know how to interact with them . . .
 

dmcowen674

No Lifer
Oct 13, 1999
54,894
47
91
www.alienbabeltech.com
Originally posted by: bennylong
Topic Title: Men: What went wrong?
Topic Summary: How did we become a second rate citzen to be used and abused by female?

It's mainly the fault of rich guys with little dicks.

But I digress..... For the ladies, you were superior until you tried to be equal.
 

Red Dawn

Elite Member
Jun 4, 2001
57,530
3
0
Originally posted by: dmcowen674
Originally posted by: bennylong
Topic Title: Men: What went wrong?
Topic Summary: How did we become a second rate citzen to be used and abused by female?

It's mainly the fault of rich guys with little dicks.
Since when did you become rich?
 

iwantanewcomputer

Diamond Member
Apr 4, 2004
5,045
0
0
that seems about right for someone who sits on their butt all day while the spouse is out making money...male or female
 

GasX

Lifer
Feb 8, 2001
29,033
6
81
Originally posted by: bennylong
Good to see we have some real men on ATOT! There is some hope for mankind.

Not as long as you are posting.