Jew Jokes

[thescreensavers]

I dont care much about the "Cheap jokes" but anything else that gets into detail thats bad then yea.

 

[zinfamous]

Originally posted by: techs
I'm proud of my Jewish heritage and our tolerance of all others.
In fact the only sin in the Jewish religion is paying retail!

<--click me

 

[shortylickens]

Originally posted by: GALIK

No, because I'm not a pussy.
Those people endured thousands of years of horrible shit.
If they cant take a joke now, fuck em.

And if you dont like it, go be a slave for egypt and see if the jokes bother you after a while. I think you'll be more concerned with the whipping and working to death.

Wow shortylickens you are just flat at stupid, i am a jew and i happen to know my peoples' history. first of all we have suffered from over 100s of things besides being slaves in Egypt, the main one being the Holocaust ofcourse

also AVAFREAK182, i dont mind the jew jokes as long as i know you, and that you are not discriminating them or being hateful, just trying to make a joke

[/quote]OK
I didnt really say you hadnt. In fact, I just looked over my post and am positive I didnt say that.

Thats OK. I understand if you want to call me stupid because you didnt understand me.
I also understand if making assumptions about me is better for your arguing position. I understand its quite common in P&N.

 

[bobross419]

Originally posted by: Leros

Originally posted by: zinfamous
I came in here for some funny Jew jokes.

left disappointed.

me too

Me too... but before I leave...

Why do Jews have such big noses?
Cuz all the airs free.

Went looking for jew jokes and this one made me lol

 

[keird]

Okay. I bought a reprint of a book from the 1830's. This was a book for entertaining young girls and in it was a riddle section, without, maddeningly enough, answers.

In it was one riddle that made me cringe, but here goes:

Why is a Jew like a Toll Collector?

There were other ethnic ones, too. Mostly references to Jews.

 

[shortylickens]

You went looking for a book on entertaining young girls?
Is there more to this story or what?

 

[CKent]

If an offensive joke is legitimately funny then great. If its intent is to shock and offend at the cost of actual humor, then obviously it's not humorous, and the attempt to shock and offend is not appreciated so it's doubly unfunny.

 

[octopus41092]

Originally posted by: DEMO24
A bit annoying really. Although the ones from actual Jews are much better and easier for me to enjoy them.

That reminds me of that one Seinfeld episode, "The Yada Yada".

 

[zerocool84]

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza?

Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.


How do you know jews are living nextdoor?

There's wet toilet paper on the clothesline.


Whats the difference between a Jew and a Canoe?

A canoe tips.


Have you heard about the Jewish sports car?

It stops on a dime, then picks it up.


What's a Jews biggest dilemma?

Free pork.


I'm half Jewish so it's all good.

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

Originally posted by: AVAFREAK182
Anyone else find jokes about Jews really just distasteful, hurtful, and just flat out rude?

I'm athiest and I even think they are just wrong.

/blog

No, and i am Jewish by heritage.

 

[IronWing]

How was copper wire invented?

 

[JohnOfSheffield]

Originally posted by: GALIKWow shortylickens you are just flat at stupid, i am a jew and i happen to know my peoples' history. first of all we have suffered from over 100s of things besides being slaves in Egypt, the main one being the Holocaust ofcourse

also AVAFREAK182, i dont mind the jew jokes as long as i know you, and that you are not discriminating them or being hateful, just trying to make a joke

1. Learn to fucking quote.
2. He's right, it's time to stop using it as an excuse that we have endured sheith, every people has, since the beginning.

???? ?????

 

[brandonbull]

Originally posted by: keird
Okay. I bought a reprint of a book from the 1830's. This was a book for entertaining young girls and in it was a riddle section, without, maddeningly enough, answers.

In it was one riddle that made me cringe, but here goes:

Why is a Jew like a Toll Collector?

There were other ethnic ones, too. Mostly references to Jews.

What did the Jew say to the pedo-bear?

 

[Miramonti]

Originally posted by: zerocool84
What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza?

Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.


How do you know jews are living nextdoor?

There's wet toilet paper on the clothesline.


Whats the difference between a Jew and a Canoe?

A canoe tips.


Have you heard about the Jewish sports car?

It stops on a dime, then picks it up.


What's a Jews biggest dilemma?

Free pork.


I'm half Jewish so it's all good.

I find holocaust jokes fairly distasteful...jokes about brutalized victims in general I don't find funny.

Jokes about cultural differences...usually no big deal imo.

 

[brandonbull]

Originally posted by: JohnOfSheffield

Originally posted by: GALIK

No, because I'm not a pussy.
Those people endured thousands of years of horrible shit.
If they cant take a joke now, fuck em.

And if you dont like it, go be a slave for egypt and see if the jokes bother you after a while. I think you'll be more concerned with the whipping and working to death.

Wow shortylickens you are just flat at stupid, i am a jew and i happen to know my peoples' history. first of all we have suffered from over 100s of things besides being slaves in Egypt, the main one being the Holocaust ofcourse

also AVAFREAK182, i dont mind the jew jokes as long as i know you, and that you are not discriminating them or being hateful, just trying to make a joke


1. Learn to fucking quote.
2. He's right, it's time to stop using it as an excuse that we have endured sheith, every people has, since the beginning.

???? ?????

I thought recent discoveries found that the Jews weren't slaves in the normal sense. They were actually soldiers and pretty high ranking officials until they were barred from being soldiers and ranking officials and became normal working people.

 

[SandEagle]

but you dont feel bad about making fun of other races/religions?

making fun of people period is distasteful

 

[seemingly random]

Originally posted by: zerocool84
What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza?

Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.


How do you know jews are living nextdoor?

There's wet toilet paper on the clothesline.


Whats the difference between a Jew and a Canoe?

A canoe tips.


Have you heard about the Jewish sports car?

It stops on a dime, then picks it up.


What's a Jews biggest dilemma?

Free pork.


I'm half Jewish so it's all good.

I still cringe at the oven jokes but the rest are pretty good. I'm wondering if my sister is part jewish - she washes and re-uses ziploc bags.

 

[Freshgeardude]

I find the typical jewish joke offensive ( stuff like holocaust and stuff like that) but I usually joke with friends about stuff like money and stuff.

btw not sure you guys all know, but I am jewish by heritage.

 

[BoomerD]

Meh...jew jokes, polack jokes, eye-talian jokes, nee-grow jokes, homosexual jokes...all can be funny in their own right...and can be equally offensive to those who are being targeted. Does that mean we need to stop telling them?

Hell no! As evidence, I offer this cut & paste (again) from an earlier thread...



I never realized how offended Polish people could get over Polish jokes, until one morning about 20 years ago, I had stopped at the mini-mart on my way to work for gas. The guy I carpooled with and I were telling Polish jokes while I filled the tank.
Some guy pulls in at the pump next to me and listens for a minute, then says to me, "Hey, I'm Polish, and I find those kinds of jokes offensive. I really wish you'd stop." Then he left and went into the store...My buddy and I ignore the jerk and continue telling Polack jokes...
He comes back out of the store, hears that we're STILL telling Polack jokes, and says, "OK asshole, I TRIED to be nice about this, but I guess the only thing left is to take you behind the store and kick your ass."
Hell, I'm running early for work, so he and I head out back.
As soon as we get behind the store, the fucker pulls a razor...
The ONLY reason I'm here to tell this story, is there was no place for him to plug it in..................


Thanks folks, I'll be here all week.

 

[shortylickens]

And by the way, Hebrew is a race. Judaism is a religion. Not all Jews are Hebrew, and not all Hebrews are Jews.
I learned that when I went to Isreal, which is more than most American Jews can say for themselves.

 

[seemingly random]

Originally posted by: brandonbull
...

I thought recent discoveries found that the Jews weren't slaves in the normal sense. They were actually soldiers and pretty high ranking officials until they were barred from being soldiers and ranking officials and became normal working people.

You're playing with fire here. Next you're going to suggest that mary magdalene wasn't really a prostitute. You could cause religious folk a lot money if they have to revive king james and get a rewrite.

 

[her209]

Originally posted by: NFS4
Did you hear the one about the Jewish girl with really big tits?

You've heard about my ex-girlfriend?

:shocked:

 

[Perknose]

Originally posted by: BoomerD
The ONLY reason I'm here to tell this story, is there was no place for him to plug it in.

Poor guy lacked an outlet for his frustration.

 

[seemingly random]

Originally posted by: BoomerD
Meh...jew jokes, polack jokes, eye-talian jokes, nee-grow jokes, homosexual jokes...all can be funny in their own right...and can be equally offensive to those who are being targeted. Does that mean we need to stop telling them?

Hell no! As evidence, I offer this cut & paste (again) from an earlier thread...



I never realized how offended Polish people could get over Polish jokes, until one morning about 20 years ago, I had stopped at the mini-mart on my way to work for gas. The guy I carpooled with and I were telling Polish jokes while I filled the tank.
Some guy pulls in at the pump next to me and listens for a minute, then says to me, "Hey, I'm Polish, and I find those kinds of jokes offensive. I really wish you'd stop." Then he left and went into the store...My buddy and I ignore the jerk and continue telling Polack jokes...
He comes back out of the store, hears that we're STILL telling Polack jokes, and says, "OK asshole, I TRIED to be nice about this, but I guess the only thing left is to take you behind the store and kick your ass."
Hell, I'm running early for work, so he and I head out back.
As soon as we get behind the store, the fucker pulls a razor...
The ONLY reason I'm here to tell this story, is there was no place for him to plug it in..................


Thanks folks, I'll be here all week.

Damn you - made me snort my pepsi.

 

[Miramonti]

Originally posted by: shortylickens
And by the way, Hebrew is a race. Judaism is a religion. Not all Jews are Hebrew, and not all Hebrews are Jews.
I learned that when I went to Isreal, which is more than most American Jews can say for themselves.

Great. Jew jokes aren't racist then. Keep 'em coming.