Is this considered cheating?

[Cook1]

Originally posted by: HN

Originally posted by: Cook1

Originally posted by: HN
what if he's thinking about HER when he's on the phone with the others? his heart still lusts for her or something.

someone start a thread where would you rather:
1. have your significant other having an affair but thinking of you during the act
or
2. have your significant other think of someone else while doing you.

But it has to be a poll...

absolutely. but since i don't show uber1337platinumblingedout member under my name, i'd probably get -1 vote

Bribe M4H to start it for ya, he's about 50/50 on AT's popularity list

JK, you know I have nothing but <3 for yas M4H!

 

[Cook1]

Originally posted by: jewno

Originally posted by: Mrvile
PICS??! I need to know if I'd hit it...

of 45 years old lady?

Even the older people need luvins now...c'mon

And I'm along the same thinking as KarenMarie here.

 

[MAME]

not cheating, just a dysfunctional relationship

 

[HN]

Originally posted by: KarenMarie

Originally posted by: HN
what if he's thinking about HER when he's on the phone with the others? his heart still lusts for her or something.

someone start a thread where would you rather:
1. have your significant other having an affair but thinking of you during the act
or
2. have your significant other think of someone else while doing you.

why is there a choice?

Why would he have to think about his wife while calling sex lines? She is right there, no?
And why is it a choice of a or b... why not just be with the one you want... or not being with them and being somewhere else? Why should there even be an option to be with one and want another?

regarding original situation - husband might want wife to talk dirty to him or something that those phone sex people do but she don't do it in the way he likes. it semi makes sense in my head.

the second part - i just heard it on the radio the other morning and thought it would make an interesting dilemma. 2 evils, which would rather be chosen kinda thing.

 

[Geekbabe]

Originally posted by: jewno

Originally posted by: Mrvile
PICS??! I need to know if I'd hit it...

of 45 years old lady?

You and whatever woman you marry will be 45 someday.. whatever will you do then ?

No sex for a year and he's dialing heavy breathing lines ? I'd say there's a problem.

 

[MercenaryForHire]

Originally posted by: Cook1

Originally posted by: HN

Originally posted by: Cook1

Originally posted by: HN
what if he's thinking about HER when he's on the phone with the others? his heart still lusts for her or something.

someone start a thread where would you rather:
1. have your significant other having an affair but thinking of you during the act
or
2. have your significant other think of someone else while doing you.

But it has to be a poll...

absolutely. but since i don't show uber1337platinumblingedout member under my name, i'd probably get -1 vote

Bribe M4H to start it for ya, he's about 50/50 on AT's popularity list

JK, you know I have nothing but <3 for yas M4H!

:heart:

- M4H

 

[huesmann]

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
lusting in one's heart is cheating by my defination. If I had a guy who I knew had deep lust for another woman, he might as well as hit it... cause he is aleady guilty in his heart and that is enough for me.

So you're basically giving him permission to hit it.

 

[tfinch2]

Originally posted by: huesmann

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
lusting in one's heart is cheating by my defination. If I had a guy who I knew had deep lust for another woman, he might as well as hit it... cause he is aleady guilty in his heart and that is enough for me.

So you're basically giving him permission to hit it.

The lady has spoken OP. HIT IT

 

[classy]

WEll its not actually fulfilling his desire to cheat, but its headed that way. Almost without fail, when sex becomes an issue, a man more often than not will cheat. So if they haven't been intimate then there is little doubt he will cave in sooner or later and do it with someone else. She should confront him and she should suggest counseling for them and she should do her part as well. If she's all out of shape and not putting forth being as attractive as she can then she share's equal blame. Whenever cheating is involved, its never all one person's fault.

 

[KarenMarie]

Originally posted by: HN
regarding original situation - husband might want wife to talk dirty to him or something that those phone sex people do but she don't do it in the way he likes. it semi makes sense in my head.

the second part - i just heard it on the radio the other morning and thought it would make an interesting dilemma. 2 evils, which would rather be chosen kinda thing.

Sorry... it is a me thing... i have zero tolerance for unfaithfulness of any sort in a relationship. No matter what the issues are.. the couple either work them out together, or they break up and find another. There is absolutely never, ever a reason for being unfaithful.


EDIT:

Originally posted by: huesmann
So you're basically giving him permission to hit it.

If he really really lusted after another in his heart... we would be finished and he would be gone, and i would be long passed caring if he hit it or not. I am not talking about the ...wow, she is gorgeous....or... look at the boobies on that ....type of thing... but if he really really wanted to be with another to the point of lusting in his heart... he can go right ahead and have it.

 

[randomlinh]

I'd say it's cheating.. but, probably also leans on the fact there's no communication between the two. we are human, we have sexual needs.. and men.. well, tend to be more needing of it seems. I remember a health/sex ed class a few semesters back, our prof was talking about a couple who were having relationship problems. the question of sex came up.. he said "we're not doing it enough." she said "oh my, we're doing it alll the time."

 

[Cook1]

So guys that are saying this is not cheating...is this the first step to actually physically cheating?

 

[HN]

Originally posted by: Cook1
So guys that are saying this is not cheating...is this the first step to actually physically cheating?

it is heading down a path that some would consider...unnatural.

 

[Cook1]

I think I saw a Jerry Springer show where a husband was doing those internet live webcam things and didn't touch his wife.

Although I don't think it would come in handy in this situation. For one Steve isn't around and throwing a chair at him wouldn't be the best of ways to resolve this.

Oh and another Q, do you guys think she should stick with the guy and work it out or cut the ties here before he goes farther down that road?

 

[Compudork]

..

 

[IHateMyJob2004]

Originally posted by: Cook1
Ok guys, help me out here.

A co-worker came up to me today and told me all this crap about her personal life about what's going on...actually made the time pass more quickly. Anyways, her husband of 10 years of marriage has been for the past year and a half has been calling phone sex lines. She wanted my opinion on it because the friend's she has talked to about it are kinda split down the middle. Some say it's not cheating because there was no physical sex involved, others are saying that it is because of the action itself. Me being 22 talking to a 45 year old lady about this I kinda told her I'd think on it. Oh and she was nice enough to tell me that they haven't been intimate in the past year...yeah, I had an interesting afternoon...

So now I'm curious what others think!

Women think it is usually. And truthfully, if you love your wife, do you go on phone sex lines and let her know about it? I'm married and DL the pron, but would never tell my wife and if she found out ..... DIVORCE!

So hells yes.

 

[sumrtym]

Well, I have a different rule on this one.

If he's PAYING for phone sex, then not cheating as there is no physical and clearly the motivation from the participant is money.

If he's NOT PAYING and having phone sex, then it's cheating, as he's actually establishing a type of relationship with someone else who has the same goal.

Same rule applies to strip clubs. Not cheating to get a lap dance from a gal you paid at a strip club, cheating to get a lap dance from some gal just you didn't pay.

And no, before you go there, this does NOT apply to prostitution. Physical sex is just plain cheating anyway you cut it.

 

[Green Man]

Definately not cheating. No worse than going to a strip club and coming home & rubbing one out.

She should be concerned about the lack of intamacy, though. That may be a sign that something is wrong with the relationship.

No sex for a year is definately worse than phone sex.

 

[QuitBanningMe]

Originally posted by: IHateMyJob2004

Originally posted by: Cook1
Ok guys, help me out here.

A co-worker came up to me today and told me all this crap about her personal life about what's going on...actually made the time pass more quickly. Anyways, her husband of 10 years of marriage has been for the past year and a half has been calling phone sex lines. She wanted my opinion on it because the friend's she has talked to about it are kinda split down the middle. Some say it's not cheating because there was no physical sex involved, others are saying that it is because of the action itself. Me being 22 talking to a 45 year old lady about this I kinda told her I'd think on it. Oh and she was nice enough to tell me that they haven't been intimate in the past year...yeah, I had an interesting afternoon...

So now I'm curious what others think!

Women think it is usually. And truthfully, if you love your wife, do you go on phone sex lines and let her know about it? I'm married and DL the pron, but would never tell my wife and if she found out ..... DIVORCE!

So hells yes.

That is sad.

 

[mrrman]

I dont think its cheating but just wrong...his wife should be the one talking dirty to him....

 

[CraigRT]

Originally posted by: cjgallen
I don't think it's cheating, but it's probably a good indicator that something is wrong in the marriage.

yeah i wouldn't define it as cheating.. but signs of problems indeed.

 

[Fullmetal Chocobo]

It's a matter of intent. If he was doing it "for fun", so to speak, and was still enjoying and in love with his wife, then no. If he wasn't paying attention to his wife, and would rather call the sex line, then yea, it was cheating...
Tas.

 

[eakers]

yes it is. being intimate with another person is cheating.

 

[shilala]

If the wife considers it cheating, it's damaging to the relationship.
If she ain't puttin out, I say tough shyt.
What's she expect???

 

[xSauronx]

i dont consider it cheating, hes horny and for whatever reason they arent getting it on....thats be like saying he was cheaitng because she caught him looking at porno.

hes a man, hes horny, if shes not getting him off something is going to. my wife freaked when she caught me spanking it to some pr0n once because she was pregnant and we hadnt done it in almost 2 months. i was 21...jesus, i cant go 2 days without needing relief sometimes, nevermind 2 feckin months!