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if your current wife/gf was your "backup"?

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What is wrong with you ?

Why in hell would anybody who claimed to be happy tell their parnter something so cruel ?
 
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb
Originally posted by: baffled2
What is wrong with you ?

Why in hell would anybody who claimed to be happy tell their parnter something so cruel ?

Ditto. Cruel is the key word here.

it's nothing about being cruel..it's about being honest. i'm totally happy with my current gf. and she was the one that asked..i definitely would not intentionally tell her but the facts bc i know she would be somewhat hurt but she directly asked and i feel it's better to be honest..so i told her yes, that there was someone else who has a piece of my heart(however gay that may sound). And in no way does that take anythign away from our current relationship.

so i firmly believe, HONESTY is the best!
 
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb
ABSOLUTELY NOT.

Why on earth would you intentionally hurt someone's feelings like that? That would hurt any woman to the point where fixing it may become impossible.

Agreed. Besides, if you're going to "settle" for someone, then you don't even deserve to be with that person at all. :|

nik
 
Originally posted by: Dumbledore
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb
Originally posted by: baffled2
What is wrong with you ?

Why in hell would anybody who claimed to be happy tell their parnter something so cruel ?

Ditto. Cruel is the key word here.

it's nothing about being cruel..it's about being honest. i'm totally happy with my current gf. and she was the one that asked..i definitely would not intentionally tell her but the facts bc i know she would be somewhat hurt but she directly asked and i feel it's better to be honest..so i told her yes, that there was someone else who has a piece of my heart(however gay that may sound). And in no way does that take anythign away from our current relationship.

so i firmly believe, HONESTY is the best!


LOL,that's cool ,I do hope she was smart enough to end the relationship so that you could go and reclaim the missing piece of your heart ?
 
Originally posted by: ffmcobalt
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb
ABSOLUTELY NOT.

Why on earth would you intentionally hurt someone's feelings like that? That would hurt any woman to the point where fixing it may become impossible.

Agreed. Besides, if you're going to "settle" for someone, then you don't even deserve to be with that person at all. :|

nik

man, ya's are making me out to be a bad person for being honest. in no way would i want to hurt her. i think it would be more hurtful if she found out the truth. the truth that i lied to her. so again..honesty!!!!

 
Originally posted by: Dumbledore
Originally posted by: ffmcobalt
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb
ABSOLUTELY NOT.

Why on earth would you intentionally hurt someone's feelings like that? That would hurt any woman to the point where fixing it may become impossible.

Agreed. Besides, if you're going to "settle" for someone, then you don't even deserve to be with that person at all. :|

nik

man, ya's are making me out to be a bad person for being honest. in no way would i want to hurt her. i think it would be more hurtful if she found out the truth. the truth that i lied to her. so again..honesty!!!!


Honesty is a very good thing and it's good that you leveled with her as the ball is now in her court and she can make an truly informed choice about continuining the relationship.
 
only a complete fool would marry his "backup"...besides women are smart about these things...sure they disillusion themselves a lot, but they usually figure these things out before they get married.
 
Originally posted by: Shiva112
only a complete fool would marry his "backup"...besides women are smart about these things...sure they disillusion themselves a lot, but they usually figure these things out before they get married.


Yeah,but it is nice to be told early on that you're just a convience and better than nothing,makes the decision making process a LOT easier 🙂
 
Originally posted by: ndee
Originally posted by: Dumbledore
Originally posted by: ndee
Why would she be your backup? Bangin' other ladies?

haha no. It's kinda like the girl you wanted to be with never worked out..so instead of sulking about what you don't have you go with what you do have.

And ya still want that other girl? Well just get over that other girl then and be satisfied(no pun intended) with your current girl.

Yeah, doesn't pretty much everyone do that? (Except for those few lucky souls who get their dream girl.) It's called reality. I'd venture to say we're all with our "backups".

 
Originally posted by: baffled2
Yeah,but it is nice to be told early on that you're just a convience and better than nothing,makes the decision making process a LOT easier 🙂

Heh ... better hope your wife/gf doesn't cruise ATOT ... you'd come home one day to find the whole house cleaned out and a "Fsck You" letter stapled to the printout of this thread. 🙂

- M4H
 
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb
Originally posted by: Skoorb
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb
ABSOLUTELY NOT.

Why on earth would you intentionally hurt someone's feelings like that? That would hurt any woman to the point where fixing it may become impossible.
Ouch! Sounds like you've been thinking about this one a lot!!

Yup. Be careful when you come home today.

:Q
 
Originally posted by: Skoorb
Originally posted by: MrsSkoorb
ABSOLUTELY NOT.

Why on earth would you intentionally hurt someone's feelings like that? That would hurt any woman to the point where fixing it may become impossible.
Ouch! Sounds like you've been thinking about this one a lot!!
(Psssst, Skoorb - Shhhh!

 
"Of course! Honesty is the secret to marital bliss
rolleye.gif
"


Okay, you were being sarcastic, but here's my take: Honesty is not the secret to bliss, but it is what leads to bliss. Dishonesty can be a big obstruction to happiness.

Let me tell you this: If any man hides information from me that would affect the outcome of an event or after I made enquiry about it, I would be sure to teach him hell. It's better to reveal things than wait for the signficant other to learn it from other sources. And I sure do not take too long to probe when I have reasons to be suspicious.

That said, some things are better left alone or unsaid. However, I do not think that that is necessarily applicable to this case. I think a good setting for saying this would be to take a significant other on a special romantic date, maybe on an anniversary, cook, do all of the nice things, treat her like a princess. And then make it known to them but how much you realised that things worked for the best and you have found true love. I can see it bugging her a bit, but bugging her for long? Hell, forget it. If she gets pissed about that, too bad. Maybe she wasn't worth it anyway.

There's an aspect of such message to appreciate, and there's part that may have her thinking. But why not be happy than jealous? Basically, this is something that doesn't matter either way. You can tell or you can choose to say nothing. It should have no adverse effect in the relationship, so long as you treat her right and show immense affection.

Personally, I much more appreciate a man who's honest with me even if I disapprove of his act or it hurts than a man who lies through his teeth and smooth talks me. That's just me, though. Some women don't love to hear the truth.
 
Originally posted by: luvly
"Of course! Honesty is the secret to marital bliss
rolleye.gif
"


Okay, you were being sarcastic, but here's my take: Honesty is not the secret to bliss, but it is what leads to bliss. Dishonesty can be a big obstruction to happiness.

Let me tell you this: If any man hides information from me that would affect the outcome of an event or after I made enquiry about it, I would be sure to teach him hell. It's better to reveal things than wait for the signficant other to learn it from other sources. And I sure do not take too long to probe when I have reasons to be suspicious.

That said, some things are better left alone or unsaid. However, I do not think that that is necessarily applicable to this case. I think a good setting for saying this would be to take a significant other on a special romantic date, maybe on an anniversary, cook, do all of the nice things, treat her like a princess. And then make it known to them but how much you realised that things worked for the best and you have found true love. I can see it bugging her a bit, but bugging her for long? Hell, forget it. If she gets pissed about that, too bad. Maybe she wasn't worth it anyway.

There's an aspect of such message to appreciate, and there's part that may have her thinking. But why not be happy than jealous? Basically, this is something that doesn't matter either way. You can tell or you can choose to say nothing. It should have no adverse effect in the relationship, so long as you treat her right and show immense affection.

Personally, I much more appreciate a man who's honest with me even if I disapprove of his act or it hurts than a man who lies through his teeth and smooth talks me. That's just me, though. Some women don't love to hear the truth.


my thoughts exactly! life is too short to be playing the "what if, then this" game. i try to be honest and i expect the honesty to be reciprocated. some of you are saying hope she ends the relationship with you and what not but if she ends the relationship because of a minor shortcoming then apparently the relationship wasn't as strong as i thought.
 
I honestly can't think of ANYONE I'd rather be with than my g/f, not even in fantasy. This is how I know she's the one. 🙂
 
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