I think my girlfriend is pregnant

[K1052]

Originally posted by: Aikouka

Originally posted by: K1052
No, I'm not perfect and I freely admit that I've made mistakes. 30-40-50 year olds continually looking down their noses at teenagers and 20 somethings for stuff either they did or could have just as easily done just gets on my nerves.

I'm 22 and I've been posting against it. Maybe it's just that my peers still haven't grown up and started to use that gray matter in their head.

I'm 25.

Let's try a little exercise. According to the OP he is finishing his first year at college so he probably about 19 at the oldest. Think back from the age of 12-20 and try to count how many things you did that now with your increasing wisdom now don't appear to have been too hot of ideas.

I know I can count quite a few (as could anyone who is actually honest).

 

[Saint Nick]

I think you're worried about it too much. Double protection is pretty good -- not perfect by any means -- but those are some pretty good ways at defeating pregnancy.

 

[sixone]

Originally posted by: manowar821

Originally posted by: sixone

Originally posted by: manowar821
Oh stop whining. You still have yet to PROVE it's murder.

You call our generation immature, but you're sure crying like a 16 year old. It's abnoxious when your kind come into threads where someone is asking for advice, and you spew out your personal and ethical beliefs.

Maybe you can tell us what else advice is supposed to be based on, genius.

Well, considering it's supposed to be useful, I'd say the advice should be based on facts and experience, instead of feelings and ethics.

I'd say he is old enough to have a good grasp on the facts, and the experience you've mentioned. The poster you quoted didn't mention anything about his personal feelings - if I missed that, please point it out to me. As for ethics, they're supposed to determine what course of action a person takes in a specific situation.

So what was your point again?

 

[Roguestar]

Originally posted by: Aikouka

Originally posted by: Roguestar
Yeah you shouldn't reply in a thread if you disagree with someone incase they reply back.

Sorry? That just seems like whoever gets their word in first is right or isn't to be argued with for the sake of keeping the thread clean? While I agree that ATOT isn't the place for this particular type of debate, the principle of your argument is somewhat backward.

Uhh no? He mentioned the thread being flooded with this and I said that it's partially the opposition's fault for perpetuating the debate. If it would've been left at some people going ":thumbsup:" or whatever, it wouldn't be as big as it is now. The ripple effect is strong within ATOT, my son.

True, but we know not everyone in ATOT agrees on every subject. And there are people who just can't let things lie, too. I guess we'd just be better off leaving threads like this ourselves but others would still bump it with their side of the rant anyway!

 

[piasabird]

Congratulations your a daddy!

 

[Aikouka]

Originally posted by: K1052
I'm 25.

Let's try a little exercise. According to the OP he is finishing his first year at college so he probably about 19 at the oldest. Think back from the age of 12-20 and try to count how many things you did that now with your increasing wisdom now don't appear to have been too hot of ideas.

I know I can count quite a few (as could anyone who is actually honest).

Something that would have dire life-changing consequences such as having a child? None. The only thing I may've done differently in college was not joining a fraternity. I had no problem with the people or their practices, but after awhile, it simply wasn't for me. Although the experiences can be good and it certainly caused no harm, it may've been better just to avoid it? It depends, one could argue either way really. I probably would argue toward avoiding it as I like my time and I hate it being wasted.

EDIT:

Originally posted by: Roguestar
True, but we know not everyone in ATOT agrees on every subject. And there are people who just can't let things lie, too. I guess we'd just be better off leaving threads like this ourselves but others would still bump it with their side of the rant anyway!

Yeah, I'm really just trying to push that you shouldn't complain about a "problem" if you're being a catalyst.

 

[iRONic]

Originally posted by: Aikouka

Originally posted by: iRONic
There is no "abstacted thought" in the OP. They talked about the possible consequences, took the proper cautions they deemed appropriate, and decided what they would do if their actions resulted in an unplanned pregnancy. All-in-all a very mature way to approach the situation.

The rhetoric and hyperbole in the thread won't change those facts.

Just because an ill outcome has a premeditated solution does not make the cause mature.

The cause?!

The friggin' "cause" may be that a wayward swimmer reached the promised land despite the well-thought out precautions put in place to prevent it.

 

[K1052]

Originally posted by: Aikouka

Originally posted by: K1052
I'm 25.

Let's try a little exercise. According to the OP he is finishing his first year at college so he probably about 19 at the oldest. Think back from the age of 12-20 and try to count how many things you did that now with your increasing wisdom now don't appear to have been too hot of ideas.

I know I can count quite a few (as could anyone who is actually honest).

Something that would have dire life-changing consequences such as having a child? None. The only thing I may've done differently in college was not joining a fraternity. I had no problem with the people or their practices, but after awhile, it simply wasn't for me. Although the experiences can be good and it certainly caused no harm, it may've been better just to avoid it? It depends, one could argue either way really. I probably would argue toward avoiding it as I like my time and I hate it being wasted.

So you've made every decision correctly/without regret during that age range except perhaps for joining a fraternity? Call me skeptical.

 

[R Nilla]

sperm, egg, fertilized egg, or fetus != baby, for the record.

 

[Aikouka]

Originally posted by: iRONic
The cause?!

The friggin' "cause" may be that a wayward swimmer reached the promised land despite the well-thought out precautions put in place to prevent it.

The cause is the act itself. We won't go into a causal regression to literally keep going backward, but if the act didn't occur, then this situation at that time wouldn't have happened.

Therefore, the premeditated "escape" does not make the act just.

Originally posted by: K1052
So you've made every decision correctly/without regret during that age range except perhaps for joining a fraternity? Call me skeptical.

I don't consider something minor such as playing a video game instead of studying as being a "big deal." Of course, it's different for me rather than others as I have a pretty good memory and didn't need to study for many things. I also never did much rather than keep to myself, therefore I had a lot less bad situations to encounter. So overall, I would say that during my college years ( where this fellow is ), I pretty much have nothing. During high school, I also have nothing really serious other than maybe adjusting to becoming more sociable earlier on, but yet again, that's not a serious thing.

 

[iRONic]

Originally posted by: Aikouka

Originally posted by: iRONic
The cause?!

The friggin' "cause" may be that a wayward swimmer reached the promised land despite the well-thought out precautions put in place to prevent it.

The cause is the act itself. We won't go into a causal regression to literally keep going backward, but if the act didn't occur, then this situation at that time wouldn't have happened.

Therefore, the premeditated "escape" does not make the act just.

If you say so...

 

[Azraele]

Given your description, it sounds more like a urinary tract infection.

 

[Aikouka]

Originally posted by: iRONic
If you say so...

I understand what you're trying to say, RON. I don't think of his actions as necessarily the most mature thing to do. I do think he took a much more serious approach to it than most and that is a commendable thing. He at least did think about the future, but still not in a very mature way. As the saying (that I like to mess up) says... "almost only counts in handshoes in horse grenades!"

 

[sao123]

Originally posted by: iRONic

Originally posted by: TheFamilyMan
You gotta love the immaturity of the new generation..."Hey, let's have all the casual sex we want to. If you happen to get pregnant, we'll just kill it like nothing ever happened. We won't tell your parents and we won't tell mine. Forget about the long-term where, one day, you'll conceive a child but always wonder about the one you threw away like dishwater. It's okay...anything that allows us to just get it on like animals with no recourse. Go ahead baby...do it...get the abortion. I don't want my life ruined right now."

OP, why don't you grow the fvck up and become a man. You laid down with this woman and should have known that one of the consequences of it could be pregnancy...nothing is 100% other than abstinence. Instead of being a man about it and thinking about what it would be like to look into the eyes of a child who is yours and knowing love like you've never known, you'd rather b!tch and whine about how inconveinent it would be for you to have to grow up right now. Selfish bastard.

Using two forms of birth control is immature?!

No... pretending that sex is an inconsequential act is immature.
I dont care if you use 17 different types of contraceptives... if you are not mature enough to handle all possible consequences, then you are irresponsible if you engage in the activity.

Originally posted by: K1052

Originally posted by: Aikouka

So... to sum up your post.

a) Perpetuating something that's bad is alright, as long as we can blame it on someone before us.

b) Thinking with desire rather than logic is far superior and should be taught. I mean, why tell people that thinking logically and weighing in consequences for actions... that's just silly.

Well point "a" works for out politicians pretty well...

My main point was that casual sex has been around since time immemorial and will long after we are gone. The only thing that really changes is how aware society is of what is going on.

How logical are most 13-14-15 year olds you meet? You can either try to give them the information on how to have safe sex and prevent pregnancy or just ignore the problem all together (which really is what abstinence education is all about).

Figuring out how to prevent pregnancy when teens have sex is like figuring out how to treat a runny nose when you have the flu. You dont treat the symptom, you treat the cause, which is teenage sex.

i am not preaching religious views of sex in marriage... but I would be advocating sex only by individuals who are (mature & responsible) mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, & financially.

 

[iRONic]

Originally posted by: Aikouka

Originally posted by: iRONic
If you say so...

I understand what you're trying to say, RON. I don't think of his actions as necessarily the most mature thing to do. I do think he took a much more serious approach to it than most and that is a commendable thing. He at least did think about the future, but still not in a very mature way. As the saying (that I like to mess up) says... "almost only counts in handshoes in horse grenades!"

My last post on the subject;

The hyperbole posted by TheFamilyMan changes nothing of the facts that the OP and his GF were mature in their actions based on their own morals and beliefs.

 

[MagicConch]

Originally posted by: sao123

i am not preaching religious views of sex in marriage... but I would be advocating sex only by individuals who are (mature & responsible) mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, & financially.

that is a good idea imo, but who would do the evaluating?

 

[K1052]

Originally posted by: sao123
[

Originally posted by: K1052

Originally posted by: Aikouka

So... to sum up your post.

a) Perpetuating something that's bad is alright, as long as we can blame it on someone before us.

b) Thinking with desire rather than logic is far superior and should be taught. I mean, why tell people that thinking logically and weighing in consequences for actions... that's just silly.

Well point "a" works for out politicians pretty well...

My main point was that casual sex has been around since time immemorial and will long after we are gone. The only thing that really changes is how aware society is of what is going on.

How logical are most 13-14-15 year olds you meet? You can either try to give them the information on how to have safe sex and prevent pregnancy or just ignore the problem all together (which really is what abstinence education is all about).

Figuring out how to prevent pregnancy when teens have sex is like figuring out how to treat a runny nose when you have the flu. You dont treat the symptom, you treat the cause, which is teenage sex.

i am not preaching religious views of sex in marriage... but I would be advocating sex only by individuals who are (mature & responsible) mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, & financially.

Stopping teens from having sex is like asking it to not rain, ever again.

Look at the success (or total lack thereof) drug abstinence programs have enjoyed.

 

[sixone]

Originally posted by: iRONic
The hyperbole posted by TheFamilyMan changes nothing of the facts that the OP and his GF were mature in their actions based on their own morals and beliefs.

If that were true, the OP wouldn't have posted here, much less in the manner that he did.

 

[Aikouka]

Originally posted by: iRONic
My last post on the subject;

The hyperbole posted by TheFamilyMan changes nothing of the facts that the OP and his GF were mature in their actions based on their own morals and beliefs.

Ohhh now I know you can't resist responding to me, you tiger you! 😉

Now see, the problem with your statement is this part right here: "based on their own morals and beliefs". This part of your statement assumes that their morals and beliefs aren't bad. Now I'm not saying the OP and/or his girlfriend are bad and evil people. But you can look at many not-so-nice people throughout history and their actions were mature based on their morals and beliefs... I'm sure you wouldn't attempt to justify things that they did with your statement?

In other words, just because something complies with someone's beliefs does not make it the right thing to do.

Let's look at something else. The OP stated pretty clearly that his girlfriend's parents do not approve of dating. Whether or not we agree with this isn't relevant, because we can't do much to "change" them. We are however talking with the OP. I would assume since the OP is playing hide the sausage with this girl, he probably cares for her quite a bit (or at least I hope so...). He mentioned that if the parents found out about a pregnancy (much less possibly an abortion) they wouldn't be pleased. There's a possibility that their actions could have huge ramifications much more than just the abortion bill. They could lose the option of seeing each other (parents wouldn't pay her tuition, she couldn't afford it, she no longer goes to college there for example) in such a simple manner. Is that honestly worth the 15-30 minutes of fun time ever so often? I sure hope you won't say yes, because if you really care for someone, you should enjoy your time with them over them.

EDIT:

Originally posted by: K1052
Stopping teens from having sex is like asking it to not rain, ever again.

Look at the success (or total lack thereof) drug abstinence programs have enjoyed.

Unfortunately I think we all know this... that no matter the efforts, it may not even make a dent.

 

[sao123]

Originally posted by: K1052

Originally posted by: Aikouka

Originally posted by: K1052
I'm 25.

Let's try a little exercise. According to the OP he is finishing his first year at college so he probably about 19 at the oldest. Think back from the age of 12-20 and try to count how many things you did that now with your increasing wisdom now don't appear to have been too hot of ideas.

I know I can count quite a few (as could anyone who is actually honest).

Something that would have dire life-changing consequences such as having a child? None. The only thing I may've done differently in college was not joining a fraternity. I had no problem with the people or their practices, but after awhile, it simply wasn't for me. Although the experiences can be good and it certainly caused no harm, it may've been better just to avoid it? It depends, one could argue either way really. I probably would argue toward avoiding it as I like my time and I hate it being wasted.

So you've made every decision correctly/without regret during that age range except perhaps for joining a fraternity? Call me skeptical.

How about from the other side of the coin.... eh?

I'll agree with you...abstinence education isnt enough... but what is needed isnt pregnancy + disease prevention education....


I'm 27. When I was 17 I did get the girl pregnant. I had Abstinence education...
I had pregnancy prevention education... Neither one worked... what I needed... and what most kids today need...


Is a swift boot to the head with a loud booming voice saying "dont phuk the hot chik"...

What I really needed & never recieved is to be locked in a closet... monitored by my parents... locked into a pair of iron underwear... Proper parenting

Parents: its your responsibility to make sure your kids dont have sex until they are mature & responsible enough for sex & alcohol, and if you cant do that, then you are bad parents, and shouldnt be having kids yourself.

 

[R Nilla]

Originally posted by: Aikouka
Let's look at something else. The OP stated pretty clearly that his girlfriend's parents do not approve of dating. Whether or not we agree with this isn't relevant, because we can't do much to "change" them. We are however talking with the OP. I would assume since the OP is playing hide the sausage with this girl, he probably cares for her quite a bit (or at least I hope so...). He mentioned that if the parents found out about a pregnancy (much less possibly an abortion) they wouldn't be pleased. There's a possibility that their actions could have huge ramifications much more than just the abortion bill. They could lose the option of seeing each other (parents wouldn't pay her tuition, she couldn't afford it, she no longer goes to college there for example) in such a simple manner. Is that honestly worth the 15-30 minutes of fun time ever so often? I sure hope you won't say yes, because if you really care for someone, you should enjoy your time with them over them.

Originally posted by: Aikouka
In other words, just because something complies with someone's beliefs does not make it the right thing to do.

 

[thomsbrain]

it really sounds like she's not preggars, but she SHOULD see a DOCTOR for the unexpected blood coming out of her vag, because she probably has an infection of some sort. and no, not a sperm infection.

 

[UncleWai]

*cough* bullsh!t *cough*

 

[sao123]

Originally posted by: K1052

Originally posted by: sao123
[

Originally posted by: K1052

Originally posted by: Aikouka

So... to sum up your post.

a) Perpetuating something that's bad is alright, as long as we can blame it on someone before us.

b) Thinking with desire rather than logic is far superior and should be taught. I mean, why tell people that thinking logically and weighing in consequences for actions... that's just silly.

Well point "a" works for out politicians pretty well...

My main point was that casual sex has been around since time immemorial and will long after we are gone. The only thing that really changes is how aware society is of what is going on.

How logical are most 13-14-15 year olds you meet? You can either try to give them the information on how to have safe sex and prevent pregnancy or just ignore the problem all together (which really is what abstinence education is all about).

Figuring out how to prevent pregnancy when teens have sex is like figuring out how to treat a runny nose when you have the flu. You dont treat the symptom, you treat the cause, which is teenage sex.

i am not preaching religious views of sex in marriage... but I would be advocating sex only by individuals who are (mature & responsible) mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, & financially.

Stopping teens from having sex is like asking it to not rain, ever again.

Look at the success (or total lack thereof) drug abstinence programs have enjoyed.

So says you... I see it as:
Asking teens not to have sex is more like asking them to wait until christmas to open their presents.
Just like children, teens are not mature enough to make the decision, and therefore it must be made for them, and enforced properly with discipline.
The program is failing because parents are afraid to or are unable to instill discipline & respect into their kids...

Originally posted by: MagicConch

Originally posted by: sao123

i am not preaching religious views of sex in marriage... but I would be advocating sex only by individuals who are (mature & responsible) mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, & financially.

that is a good idea imo, but who would do the evaluating?

Unfortunately that sint possible, but just like other agendas, you have to go with a majority thing... Drivers @ 18, Voting @ 18, Alcohol @ 21... set forth an agenda for sex as well, and enforce it.

 

[imported_Lothar]

Originally posted by: TheFamilyMan
You gotta love the immaturity of the new generation..."Hey, let's have all the casual sex we want to. If you happen to get pregnant, we'll just kill it like nothing ever happened. We won't tell your parents and we won't tell mine. Forget about the long-term where, one day, you'll conceive a child but always wonder about the one you threw away like dishwater. It's okay...anything that allows us to just get it on like animals with no recourse. Go ahead baby...do it...get the abortion. I don't want my life ruined right now."

OP, why don't you grow the fvck up and become a man. You laid down with this woman and should have known that one of the consequences of it could be pregnancy...nothing is 100% other than abstinence. Instead of being a man about it and thinking about what it would be like to look into the eyes of a child who is yours and knowing love like you've never known, you'd rather b!tch and whine about how inconveinent it would be for you to have to grow up right now. Selfish bastard.

:thumbsup: from a 21 year old.