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I ruined a marriage today...

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lxskllr said:
If you were a real friend, you'd be hiding assets for him, so when he gets the fuck out, he'll have a nest egg she doesn't know about. Your friend should get a "crack habit" so he can justify the missing money come court time.
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No assets. That literally was their last $300. They have acquired a used vehicle since marriage but it has been in her name exclusively. We've discussed it in the past and it sounds like he's willing to just let it go. If I told you their living situation, you probably wouldn't believe me.
 
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buster1.jpg
 
What's the worst possible living arrangement for a newlywed couple with a child from her existing marriage other than being homeless? It's more believable if one of you guesses right.
 
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My wife commented yesterday that, "isn't Valentine's day for people who are dating, not married?"

You've gotta learn how to raise them. 😀

Sounds like OP's brother's wife is projecting for some reason. Must be he didn't meet up to 100% of her expectations for the day. She probably read Shades of Gray or something and expected some unattainable standard from him that day. When he couldn't do the impossible, she looked for something external to blame: the OP.
 
DrPizza said:
My wife commented yesterday that, "isn't Valentine's day for people who are dating, not married?"

You've gotta learn how to raise them. 😀

Sounds like OP's brother's wife is projecting for some reason. Must be he didn't meet up to 100% of her expectations for the day. She probably read Shades of Gray or something and expected some unattainable standard from him that day. When he couldn't do the impossible, she looked for something external to blame: the OP.
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I'm the one who made the inconsiderate 12:11 PM phone call to our friend. Didn't realize what a thoughtless/horrible thing that was.
 
This is the solution. The resulting aftermath will lead to a happier guy in the long run regardless of which way it goes afterwards. Either she'll get her mind slapped right, leave and/or have you arrested but after that is all done...happiness awaits.

woman-slap.jpg
 
Dari said:
The marriage is unstable but the OP should've known better. Why get involved in that mess?
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We did not do anything to "get involved."

I simply called my friend at 12:11 PM on a Saturday. Just gave him a heads-up that I was on his side of town. Was not expecting drama.
 
If they do get a divorce you did him a favor. She sounds nuts, seriously who the hell cares? Why do you need a special day to do something with someone you love. Its all about the money, reservations at restaurants, people selling you all kinds of crap that they make you think you need.

You can go to a nice restaurant with your loved one any weekend or any time. I hate holidays, especially fake ones like valentines day. Hope your friend gets some help soon.
 
Ichinisan said:
We did not do anything to "get involved."

I simply called my friend at 12:11 PM on a Saturday. Just gave him a heads-up that I was on his side of town. Was not expecting drama.
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It was Valentine's Day. I'm sure you knew that. And I'm also sure you knew about his wife. Also, egging on the husband to come anyway was just asking for drama. A weak man like that would surely tell his wife everything.
 
Dari said:
The marriage is unstable but the OP should've known better. Why get involved in that mess?
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How would I have known anything? I haven't seen my friend in 5 months and I haven't seen her in much longer. I have never even seen where they live.

dank69 said:
Living with the kid's father?
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That's actually closer to the situation with his last "girlfriend" who was just looking for a second baby-daddy's income while staying with the first baby-daddy. Before her pregnancy was obvious she tried to find someone she could pass it off on, going out of her way to find someone uncircumcised so that she could use curiosity as an excuse for unprotected sex. I caught her hugging and kissing the old existing baby-daddy when I was giving her a lift to see my friend.

I'll put it this way: his step daughter gets to see her grandparents a lot. Every day. They hate her stepdad because he has no assets and married their crazy daughter when she threatened to leave him otherwise. Awkward.

dank69 said:
I hope she is as hot as she is crazy.
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Better than I could do.

Dari said:
It was Valentine's Day. I'm sure you knew that. And I'm also sure you knew about his wife. Also, egging on the husband to come anyway was just asking for drama. A weak man like that would surely tell his wife everything.
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You can't be serious. He knew it was simply a self-deprecating joke intended to portray my "perpetually-single" self as clueless about adult relationships and what they do on Valentine's Day. I wasn't seriously continuing to ask him to come. I never was in the first place. I was simply informing him of where we were and what we were doing in case he and/or his wife wanted to conveniently tag along.

Like I said: We accepted that he was busy. You do know what "facetious" means, right?
 
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CZroe said:
No assets. That literally was their last $300. They have acquired a used vehicle since marriage but it has been in her name exclusively. We've discussed it in the past and it sounds like he's willing to just let it go. If I told you their living situation, you probably wouldn't believe me.
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Well there is the problem. Poor and happy only happens in foreign countries and Hollywood.
 
poofyhairguy said:
Well there is the problem. Poor and happy only happens in foreign countries and Hollywood.
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Agreed. With his new career they've come a long way in the last year. I was wondering why they were still living there after solving the vehicle situation... until I heard about her tearing up and flushing $300. No longer curious. That explains it.
 
Ichinisan said:
Just got a call from her on his phone.

"You guys win. I'm tired of competing with ya'll. We're getting a divorce for real this time."

She kept repeating that and hung up.

She said that my brother told her she wasn't our friend. I told her I honestly don't believe he ever said that and I think she misinterpreted something.

Not sure if she heard that.
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I hope so for your friend's sake - he is a fool to stay married to someone like that.

I've had 2 friends who married ladies who were similar to your friend's wife in that they were extremely insecure and wouldn't "allow" their men to hang out with their friends without months (no, I am not exaggerating) of notice. Rather than doing the smart thing and nuking the marriage early, both doubled down on dumb and had multiple kids with these psychos and THEN got a divorce. One friend even asked me my opinion before he had any kids and I told him I would've divorced her the day after the wedding.
 
Leros said:
Sounds like his wife is ruining his marriage.
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And you'd be doing him a favor by "ruining" his marriage.

edit: BTW, what married couple give more than a casual crap about Valentine's (a.k.a., National Extort Money From Men) Day?

And what the hell was your loser friend doing going to bed at 5am, unless that's when he got off work?
 
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CZroe said:
No assets. That literally was their last $300. They have acquired a used vehicle since marriage but it has been in her name exclusively. We've discussed it in the past and it sounds like he's willing to just let it go. If I told you their living situation, you probably wouldn't believe me.
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We're all ears and it makes those of us who are married appreciate our spouses even more. Please, do tell.
 
Dari said:
It was Valentine's Day. I'm sure you knew that. And I'm also sure you knew about his wife. Also, egging on the husband to come anyway was just asking for drama. A weak man like that would surely tell his wife everything.
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1. I think it's clear that I completely forgot it was Valentine's Day. We weren't even thinking about that. Regardless, if calling someone in the middle of the day is forbidden, he should turn his phone off. *I* received calls that day from a former coworker who needed help configuring email on a new phone. He wouldn't know if I had a wife / girlfriend. Was it a no-no for him to call me for assistance? The guy was asleep at 12:11 PM. He over-slept. If anything, I did them a favor so they could get their V-Day started.

2. That would be the safest possible time to call on V-Day / Saturday.

3. I have not seen them apart even once since before they met. I would not expect him to meet me at the flea market without her. Couples never do a little shopping for fun in the early afternoon on V-Day?

4. We didn't "egg him on." We gave a courtesy call and let him know what we were doing. "Do unto others as you would have them do to you." Relationship or not, I expect a courtesy call when he's in my town. We might want to return a borrowed item or something. 🙄
 
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waffleironhead said:
You should text back thanking him for the nude photos.
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:sneaky:

It sounds like your friends marriage was in trouble and you just weren't aware of it, or the extent of it more likely, and she's trying real hard to pin something on you for no reason.

katy-hug.gif
 
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