I ruined a marriage today...

[CZroe]

I'm rarely off on weekends with my brother. We're even more rarely in town where our friend lives (last time was Sept). We used to hang out a few times a week to play Mario Kart 64 Battle Mode but I've only seen him about 3 times since he got married 1.5yrs ago. I get it: Priorities.

Today, we happened to be in town again for an indie game store and a swap meet. I called to let him know in case he and his wife wanted to tag along or meet up after. I'm almost perpetually single (like most of AT ), so it didn't occur to me that it's Valentine's Day. No biggie: He'll tell me he's busy and we'll simply go on with our days, right?

Our call actually woke him up just past noon. He reminded us that it was V-Day. He had plans. We accepted/understood. Before disconnecting I facetiously encouraged him to come anyway, joking that he should tag along to get her some Ninja Turtles or Sponge Bob Valentine's cards. He moaned about going to sleep at 5AM so I told him to either go back to bed or go ahead and enjoy the day with his wife. With no harm so far and no intention to contact again, I considered the wake-up call a favor (more of the day with her).

Hours later, we were on our way home when we got this text message:

Come get [friend]!
This is [friend's wife's] ...congrats you and your brother succeeded at ruining today for us

Whatever it was, we did NOT want to get involved. Doing so would only validate her crazy notion that we were trying to steal him away from her on Valentine's Day. Instead, we hesitated and waited to actually hear from him. It didn't matter: The messages from her continued.

This is [friend's wife]. You [Ichinisan] and Emmett [CZroe] stay out of mine and [friend's] marriage! ..stop calling! Stop asking him to go off! We are having problems in our marriage and all y'all are doing is interfering!

That's when he finally contacted us directly and started begging us for help. While were in touch with him directly, she sent another message... impersonating him!

look you guys should not have called and asked me to go off with y'all. Y'all know that i am married and that today is Valentine's day and i would be spending today with my WIFE. You and Emmett showed no respect for [wife's name], my WIFE, when y'all called me this morning and asked me to go off.
My wife and marriage mean more to me than you and Emmett or anyone.
Im changing my number for the last time.

Wow. This isn't the first time she has impersonated him in a message to us.

Is anyone else so touchy about V-Day that you can't take a call at noon?! We had the exact opposite experience later today:

When my brother and I got to my apartment, my roommate had just arrived with his girlfriend and they had set the table for a dinner together. We tried to leave so they would have some privacy and they begged us to stay. We made up an excuse to leave but they continued politely asking us to stay right up until we left. Should I expect a nasty encounter with them later for having the NERVE to show up at my own apartment?!

Edit: Clarified a bit

 

[Nograts]

Your friend and his wife are complete fucktards. I would cut all ties if they made this big of a deal about a phone call.

What are they 18?

 

[Carson Dyle]

Emmett? For real?

 

[master_shake_]

Obvious bitch is obvious.

Tell her to get over herself.

 

[Leros]

Sounds like his wife is ruining his marriage.

 

[Nograts]

Obvious bitch is obvious.

Tell her to get over herself.

Yeah but the response from her hubby (his friend) is what sealed the deal.

Jump ship from these loonies. If he ever calls you asking to hang out just tell him you can't because you're chasing tail and you don't want to ruin his relationship and then hang up the phone. Fuck that.

Isn't this a violation of the bro code on like 92 different levels?

 

[Childs]

The shocking thing is that your name is Emmett. I didn't picture you looking like this guy:

 

[Childs]

Emmett? For real?

Oh cmon...cant even be the first to post an old man Emmett joke!

 

[Humpy]

Women gonna women.

The absolute nicest thing in the world you could do right now is go kidnap your buddy and hide him in your apartment for a year or two.

 

[DAGTA]

W. T. F.

 

[CZroe]

I prefer being compared to eccentric Doc Emmett Brown from Back to the Future.

Anyway, ALL of those texts were from her, even the one that is supposedly from him. She is impersonating him because she can't tolerate that he isn't sharing her opinion with us (he knows she's being unreasonable).

 

[Sonikku]

How dare you get in the way of her Corporate approved day of the year to show affection to her spouse.

I mean now she'll have to wait a whole other year before she can go out to eat and do something special with him OP. Are you proud of yourself?

bazinga.

 

[master_shake_]

Yeah but the response from her hubby (his friend) is what sealed the deal.

Jump ship from these loonies. If he ever calls you asking to hang out just tell him you can't because you're chasing tail and you don't want to ruin his relationship and then hang up the phone. Fuck that.

Isn't this a violation of the bro code on like 92 different levels?

it wasn't from him it was from her impersonating him.

sounds like a fucking nutjob and i feel bad for your friend.

 

[chimaxi83]

Lol I like how a couple of single bros pretend to not know today is Valentine's Day. Emmett and Billy Ray, y'all ain't fixins' to fool us now, are ya's?!

Also, your friend is unfortunately married to a creepy, controlling bitch. Actually, your friend is a little creepy for letting his wife do that.

 

[DAGTA]

Imagine how good relationships could be if women weren't crazy

 

[waffleironhead]

Sounds like he stuck his dick in crazy. If the marriage ends, you may have just done him a favor.

 

[Markbnj]

That's off the charts stupid. I'd call any friend of mine at noon on a Hallmark Holiday and their wives wouldn't complain even a little. Of course all my friends and I have been married over 20 years, and so our wives are more likely to be all like "Don't you have any friends who can call and ask you to go out?"

 

[Childs]

Lol I like how a couple of single bros pretend to not know today is Valentine's Day. Emmett and Billy Ray, y'all ain't fixins' to fool us now, are ya's?!

I didn't know it was V day either until last night. I went to bakery yesterday for some cupcakes, and wondered why they asked me if I wanted red and white ones. I brought them over to a friends house for dinner, and his daughter showed me her v day haul, and thats when I realized what day it was.

Odd Not in My Day Fact: Kids don't address valentines cards anymore. They just bring them in and the teacher divides them equally so all kids can get an equal amount. Her mom asked if she wanted to give me one, and she said no, they were all hers! I thought the angst of not getting any v day cards was over. lol

 

[Nograts]

Not going to lie, was hoping for a XXX rated version of this story.

 

[waffleironhead]

You should text back thanking him for the nude photos.

 

[Ichinisan]

I prefer being compared to eccentric Doc Emmett Brown from Back to the Future.

Anyway, ALL of those texts were from her, even the one that is supposedly from him. She is impersonating him because she can't tolerate that he isn't sharing her opinion with us (he knows she's being unreasonable).

It's not the first time she has impersonated him while telling us not to call or text him ever again.

She got it in her head a while back, somehow, that we were telling him she was sabotaging our friendship. We never said or implied that. Then she does exactly that by impersonating him and saying "don't ever call or text again."

It's like some kind of self-fulfilling prophetic paranoia.

 

[Ichinisan]

I didn't know it was V day either until last night. I went to bakery yesterday for some cupcakes, and wondered why they asked me if I wanted red and white ones. I brought them over to a friends house for dinner, and his daughter showed me her v day haul, and thats when I realized what day it was.

Odd Not in My Day Fact: Kids don't address valentines cards anymore. They just bring them in and the teacher divides them equally so all kids can get an equal amount. Her mom asked if she wanted to give me one, and she said no, they were all hers! I thought the angst of not getting any v day cards was over. lol

 

[Ophir]

Sounds like the marriage was already ruined.

 

[Ichinisan]

Just got a call from her on his phone.

"You guys win. I'm tired of competing with ya'll. We're getting a divorce for real this time."

She kept repeating that and hung up.

She said that my brother told her she wasn't our friend. I told her I honestly don't believe he ever said that and I think she misinterpreted something.

Not sure if she heard that.

 

[master_shake_]

Just got a call from her on his phone.

"You guys win. I'm tired of competing with ya'll. We're getting a divorce for real this time."

She kept repeating that and hung up.

She said that my brother told her she wasn't our friend. I told her I honestly don't believe he ever said that and I think she misinterpreted something.

Not sure if she heard that.

im sure you'll be getting a call that she tried to or is trying to kill herself in the next 5 hours.