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I just found the weirdest letter I've ever gotten.

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From a practical standpoint, he/she might have made an easier transition at the workplace by transitioning to a different workplace😛
From a dollars standpoint, that would have been tough. First, to save up enough money to get the surgery, then have enough savings to cover looking for the new job.
New job? Imagine having to essentially reveal to a perspective employer that "I got all my experience as Gordon, but I am Martha now"..........
The only way around that would be if your current employer would agree to not reveal who you started at the company as.
I guess making the change while keeping the same employment Is the best answer.
 
I forgot to add earlier in my long post about the actual OP's reason for posting.
I think its the best thing he/she could have done, after all, it would have been far worse to go through some of the more serious changes without telling anyone as people would start up the rumour mill, which is bad as the rumour mill frequently turns nasty.......being upfront means that anyone who has a problem with it has a chance to address it with the switcher (the 'in the scene' phrase for a gender changer) professionaly rather than maliciously behind their back.
If people want to have a problem with it, then fair enough, we all get our own say in the world, but the same way i cant grab a smokers pack of cigarettes and toss them in a bin because his smoke is annoying me, the anti-switcher people dont have a right to force people to stay with the gender their bodies have assumed. We do in this world what we choose to do, and if it doesnt harm others then whats the problem????

Oh and in answer to the question about dating someone and finding out their are switched, i would let them know i'd prefer the relationship to end, that although it isnt a problem for me to know them or even hug them, the other things you do in a relationship are just a bit more than i'd want to do with a man changed to woman. I'm sure some of you out there are yelling 'HYPOCRITE' at your screens as loudly as you can. I'm not being a hypocrite, a hypocrite is someone who says 'yeah man, i dont mind gay people' then runs the next time one tries to hug them. I dont have a problem with hugging a gay guy, used to be a guy called Orlando (i know, sounds bs, but its true..lol) who worked in my office, not just gay but camp as they come too. Mad fun guy, quite frequently would run around the office hugging and kissing people, our office is fairly mixed group of people but all are lighthearted and not prejudiced in anyway, at least not openly. Never bothered me once when he would grab me in a bear hug and smooch my cheek, why should it bother me? i wouldnt date him and i wouldnt kiss with tongues, im not gay, i like women, pure and simple, but i personally dont have a problem with peoples eccentricities in life, it makes it more fun to live,...

All im trying to say is, the way your bought up, by your parents, your peers, your friends, your background, your social standing, your area, your town, your country etc all has an impact on the way you think, behave and believe. Sometimes people are a little too strictly into a regime of tolerence, other people like me really dont have any limit to tolerence or patience, neither way is wrong because we are each our own. But just maybe, as has been suggested, before automatically making a comment with vile, bitter or simple prejudiced remarks, you actually take time to find out more information about what your are entering into as a discussion, at least then so you can give a fair debate without resorting to pathetic snipes about peoples age or location or their mums etc etc. You dont have to be an adult to talk effectively and get your point across, you become a child in a conversation when you resort to childlike outbursts.

And on that note, im off to bed, good nyte ladies, gents, and androgynous peoples of ATOT
 
Originally posted by: Specop 007
Originally posted by: Citrix
Originally posted by: Specop 007
Originally posted by: Citrix
I have nothing at all against transsexuals. however, having a meeting called and handing that crap out to your employees is not cool and totally unprofessional. If i was there i would have walked out, not because of what he handed out offended me or becuase i think he is a freak. but because he just involved me and the rest of the company/dept in his personal life that should stay at home.
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You would prefer he show up on Monday in a suit, and Tuesday in a dress with tits?
I think he did the right thing by being open with his employees, otherwise the Monday suit Tuesday tits thing would be a reality, and everyone would have a BIG WTFBBQ?!
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no, He should have had a one on one meeting with each employee of his to tell them what was going on and what to expect. that would have been the correct way of dealing the situation.
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Wait. First you say he shouldnt involve you in his personal life, then you say he should involve you in his personal life on a personal level (1 on 1 meeting) rather then generally?! What the hell??

He HAS to talk tot he employees. HE HAS NO CHOICE. You WILL be involved in his personal life, because his personal life AND appearance are changing. Whether you want to or not you will be involved if you continued to work for someone who had the operation.
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Citrix is just trying to find something to complain about. You see, there are certain people in this world that just like to complain just to complain.
 
Sometimes I wish I was a woman, but only so I would have boobies and a vagina. That would rule. I don't think any of the men here would deny this fact 🙂
 
Seems like a good way to get an awkward situation out of the way. Seriously, I can't imagine the courage it would take to do somethng like that -- She must have REALLY felt she had to have the operation to go through such a hassle. I am not 100% comfortable with transexuals, but that's probably because I never have worked closely with any (that I know of), so there is an awkwardness because of my own ignorance on the subject. If one of my colleagues gave me such a letter I would try to be supportive and hopefully would learn something as well.
 
She was saving up for the operation which supposedly cost like 20 grand. What was even weirder was when we had a little get together outside of work and when I showed up he/she was lounging by the pool in a red one piece bathing suit. I was just trying to figure out where "it" was.
 
This would make me uncomfortable in the workplace because it breaks the dynamics of the workplace. There are many things like this that make me uncomfortable. For example, a girl I used to work with would frequently speak with her boyfriend at length (she was salaried and worked late, so no it wasn't slacking off really) often would hang up and be in tears. She wasn't speaking english to him so I never knew what they were saying. I asked a few times if she was ok and she always said she was fine. But yet the phone calls and resultant tears continued. It would be uncomfortable in the same way as that.

On the other hand it would be empowering in some ways. I would feel that I could trust the person more, since she was able to confide something personal at the workplace and continue working there.

I have no idea if it would bother me in some way beyond the knowing too much about a coworker way. By the same token, no idea about dating a transgender person. I can say for sure that it would be very difficult for her to have a good relationship, not only due to emotional baggage, but because the surgery is cosmetic and doesn't really make everything work and feel the same way as a naturally born person of the same gender. At least according to my genetics book in college.
 

I Have a freind, BJ who was born with a bit of both. The doctors decided to go male, whoops, wrong choice. the body began producing female hormones. He underwent hormone therapy (oh no what a freak, foreign chemicals?!!) . It kept him from getting breasts, but he still has about 0 on the peter meter. He didn't get a sex change but it was his choice. would you think he was a freak if he had tried to correct the doctors original error.

Additionally most transgenders start feeling that way at age 4-5 because that's when hormones start developing mental and physiological differences between sexes. Even as a fetus males and femals are the same, do you not accept that anomalies can occur causing sex to manifest incorrectly?

91TTZ, have you ever read any scientific material on this, or are you basing you arguments on your feelings?
frankly if you want to call someone a freak, so what. it is a label given by individual opinion, it's certainly your right to be freaked out by things you do not understand or accept.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ

If you began seeing a beautiful woman and you got along great, what would you do if she told you that she used to be a man? Would you honestly have no problems with it and continue an otherwise great relationship, or would you be disgusted and instantly break it off? I just want to know your stance on this. Do you find it so acceptable that you'd have no problem dating a transsexual, or do you still hold some reservations about the whole idea and consider it a showstopper?
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ask for baby pictures on the first date!
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: nakedfrog
Originally posted by: TravisT
Time to quit if you ask me.
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What's the logic behind this brilliant statement?
Worried you might find a woman who used to be a man attractive?
Worried you might somehow catch "teh ghey" or "OMG! AIDS!"?
Or something else?
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I'm just guessing here, but maybe it's because some people don't like to be around freaks. Just because some freak decided that they want to change genders doesn't mean everyone is forced to feel comfortable about it.

No matter how much you try to justify your actions to someone else, that does not change reality or their perceptions about you. You cannot force someone to agree with your choices. It is not natural to inject yourself with female hormones, get bitch tits, and lop off your penis. That's a mental problem.
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Although, I agree with you on the first part of the statement. aAs for the last couple sentences, I believe he was not looking for anyone's satisfaction but his own. His openness with others is to merely clarify and reduce confusion, not to change anybody's mind or perspective on thier ideas and beliefs.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
I'm going to be serious for a moment, so I'll old off on the humorous cheap shots.

Amused, do you have any personal attachment to this subject?

And I have an honest question for you:

If you began seeing a beautiful woman and you got along great, what would you do if she told you that she used to be a man? Would you honestly have no problems with it and continue an otherwise great relationship, or would you be disgusted and instantly break it off? I just want to know your stance on this. Do you find it so acceptable that you'd have no problem dating a transsexual, or do you still hold some reservations about the whole idea and consider it a showstopper?
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I wanted to personally address this question, just for the hell of it.

yeah, I'd consider it to be a showstopper. I want a woman who is in every way female, from her mind to her body. A person with a sex change is not 'naturally' female. There is nothing natural about having your 'natural' body modified by man. Now I'm not saying sex changes are deviant, nor do I have anything against people who have sex changes. But for something as really personal as a relationship, someone with a sex change would not be my cup of tea, period.

But I believe in "men who are born as women" or vice versa. I believe that gay/lesbians don't relaly have a choice - that their love for their own sex is as natural as is my natural urge for females and not males. It means a lot for anyone to find their love in life, and if they can find it, be any sexual catergory outside the norm, then so be it.

Although I am really only talking about human to human relationships, and not children 😛.
 
Taejin,

What about a woman with breast implants?

Lasik surgery?

Or one who pads her bra and wears lifts in her shoes?

Or who wears makeup?

At what point do the modifications stop being "natural" for you?


Not that I'm questioning your preference in this case, but as with many other things in life,
what you describe can be taken as a matter of degree.

The ultimate answer to 91TTZ's question is "it depends on how far into the relationship, and how strong the bond between".
Part of the reason pre and post-op transgenders announce themselves as such is in effort to find just the kind of
people who can accept them for what the are (becoming). Or to put it in another way:

"If you began seeing a beautiful woman and you got along great, what would you do if she told you that she was dying?"





 
Originally posted by: CQuinn
Taejin,

What about a woman with breast implants?

Lasik surgery?

Or one who pads her bra and wears lifts in her shoes?

Or who wears makeup?

At what point do the modifications stop being "natural" for you?


Not that I'm questioning your preference in this case, but as with many other things in life,
what you describe can be taken as a matter of degree.

The ultimate answer to 91TTZ's question is "it depends on how far into the relationship, and how strong the bond between".
Part of the reason pre and post-op transgenders announce themselves as such is in effort to find just the kind of
people who can accept them for what the are (becoming). Or to put it in another way:

"If you began seeing a beautiful woman and you got along great, what would you do if she told you that she was dying?"
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sorry to say, but your post doesnt work, someone dying isnt in the same sport, never mind league........

I would continue to go out with someone who was dying to make their last days happier so long as i wanted to be with them myself........if i didnt want to go out with them then i woudlnt already be their boyfriend so its a moot point.....

Its a totally different thing from going out with someone who has changed gender when you are not into bi or gay stuff......if you are then i guess it might be something you would consider carrying on.....i am totally hetero tho so it wouldnt be for me, despite how good the operations were and how convincing the person was......
sad to say it, but if they wernt up front in the beginning, even tho if they are its harder for them to get someone to even consider going out wiht them, then it means they have lied to me, and one thing i dont like is lies......obviously tiny tiny lies of no consequence or even for my sake are one thing, but lies that have a distinct impression on something concerning me or my partner are not something i want in a relationship.....

 
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