How do I get my teenage son to shave?

[S4M33R]

Originally posted by: Descartes
Personally, I'd be proud of the little man for his individuality.

Tell him that and he might get frightened and shave it Of course this all depends on his intelligence and personality, but a little reverse pyschology never hurt. If he catches on and continues to grow it, call him pube-face and convince his friends to do the same.

edit: convincing his friends might involve bribery, but more importantly: facial hair is no big deal he'll eventually get around to shaving once his current girlfriend dumps him and he realizes all the girls in his grade think he is gross.

 

[S4M33R]

Originally posted by: NuclearFusi0n
oh yeah, picj your battle a little more wisely plz

 

[jyates]

You know I read this thread at work and have thought about it and have
come to the conclusion that if your son isn't giving you a bunch of problems
at 14 other than wanting a little chin hair that you should count yourself
lucky considering some of the things that he could be into.

My son is 16 and since it's summer time he goes 3 or 4 days without shaving
and gets a little hairy but he's just "playing" with a new toy and as soon as school
starts back up he'll have to stay clean shaven per their dress codes.
He doesn't give me one ounce of trouble so I'm not worried about his facial hair
in the least.

Jim

 

[nan0bug]

Originally posted by: Skoorb
That's fine that you think that way, but there is a reason why people see most goths as losers and it's because they are. I'm talking from a social fits-in-with-regular-people standpoint. They may be great people and have bright futures, etc. but nobody who's popular and well adjusted in life decides to adopt that life style. They adopt it because they've failed at the regular normalistic approach and this is their sour grapes way of dealing with it. You can call me ignorant or small minded for that point of view, but that would be just as bigoted as how you see me

Well, 'most' people also think Michael Moore is an honest guy who makes factual documentaries. Whats your point?

Did it ever cross your mind that maybe the reason people get involved in any counter-culture is because its what makes them happy, and nothing more?

Seriously. I'm not a 'goth' in the purest sense of the word but I hang out in goth clubs from time to time. I like to wear black every once in a while, not for any real signifigant purpose but just because it looks cool and I like it and I don't exist to please other people. It makes me happy. I'd rather be happy than 'popular'. I've tried hanging out with 'popular' and 'regular' people. I've found they're 'boring' and 'dreary'.

I know a lot of goths. Most are not self-loathing people with a lack of self-esteem. In fact, I'd say a majority of the ones I have met are well adjusted people. They just happen to have an interest in gothic culture. So what?

 

[Cobalt]

Originally posted by: badmouse

Originally posted by: werk
Did he actually say he was trying to grow a beard in order to look like Gandalf?

Yes.

Take everything of his away. TAKE IT ALL.

 

[KokomoGST]

Tell his friends to mock him mercilessly for having that POS beard of his... make sure all the girls at school know he's a giant dork for wanting a "Gandalf" beard.

 

[DaiShan]

Originally posted by: Amused

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
There's only one way to solve this. Can't grow a beard without a head. *giggles*

Really though, just tell him to shave it. If he doesn't listen, find out what is important to him, and take it away.

No, if he doesn't listen, kick his insolent ass and shave him yourself.

If you cannot control this, you have lost all control and might as well give up.

LOL jesus man chill out. Not everyone was raised with a drill instructor for a father. I'm 19 and still can't grow a full beard, but I grow enough so that you can tell when I haven't shaved for a few days, I'm living at home this summer, but I've been taking a lot of summer classes online so I don't really leave the house except on the weekends, so I forget to shave, when that happens my dad (or mom) tells me I need a shave, simple as that, they don't yell and make a big fuss about it, or try to "beat the weird out of you boy" He's a person, be rational I'm sure he'll understand taht your house your rules.

 

[DaiShan]

Originally posted by: badmouse

Originally posted by: werk
Did he actually say he was trying to grow a beard in order to look like Gandalf?

Yes.

Hahahah well in that case, logic won't work, smack him upside the head until he shaves that off. Next thing you know he'll stop showering to get the "Orc appeal"

 

[leeharris100]

I had thick sideburns at 14, and everyone loved them. But the general douchestaches in high school need to be against the law. In fact, you don't even need to give them a warning, they just need to be shot.

But in all seriousness, just use sarcasm against his beard. My mom used to do that.

 

[AreaCode707]

As teens grow up they need to start asserting some control over their own lives, and dress (within limits) and hairstyles are some of the ways they do that. At 14 he's at the age to make those choices for himself. It hurts nothing if he has a beard, and you're wise to not care and just let it go. Trying to make that choice for him will probably result in arguments, because he won't see a reason that you want him to be rid of it except that you want to be in control. Let this one go, and encourage him to make wise choices as he gets older and starts taking more responsibility for his own life.

 

[Gurck]

Originally posted by: MAME

Originally posted by: Jzero

Originally posted by: MAME

Originally posted by: Gurck

Originally posted by: MAME
why should he shave?

Because the person(s) providing for him want him to.

why do they want him to shave?

They don't. In Badmouse's second post to this thread she said:

The whole reason I'm asking this question here is that I personally don't care whether he has a beard or not, and I want to see if I need to expend my leet parenting skills on this matter, or if I can let it slide - looking for other people's opinions.

Then I win! Take that Gurck!

That's different then I suppose. I guess my comment had a bit wider a focus; regardless of the issues, parents who don't stand up to their own kids and who rationalize everything their kids do disgust me. If you don't mind that he's growing the beard, though, it's nothing to take a stand on. I'm sorry for skimming it over

 

[xyion]

I do not have children as of yet. However, I did go through the same phase your son did. My mother wanted me to shave my (pathetic attempt of a) goatee when I was younger. I failed to comply. I had my drivers license (good for 6 years) and college ID card taken with it on.

Needless to say, I have shaved the goatee off, and am still embarrassed to this day (happened tonight, shaved years ago) about those pictures. My advice? Let him be, unless it is not allowed by his school, goes against some rules, or something of that nature. In time he'll realize how bad it looks (unless it looks good. I still keep a bit of facial hair), and shave it off. Nothing you can do but wait.

I'll tell you what, I (unintentionally) put my mother through hell. He'll grow out of it, I promise. I know I did.

 

[LeStEr]

Originally posted by: werk

Originally posted by: badmouse

Originally posted by: werk
Did he actually say he was trying to grow a beard in order to look like Gandalf?

Yes.

He has a bigger problem than the beard then.

 

[DJFuji]

when he's asleep, shave letters or funny patterns into his beard. Or just mess it up so horribly that he won't have any other choice but to shave it off. Or get lice from somewhere and when he's asleep...

 

[Nikamichi]

badmouse,

tell your son to meet Nebor in the laundry room.

 

[imported_d0c]

The girlfriend is a very powerful motivator. Make her your ally, and you will succeed in the eradication of his facial hair as well as offering a valuable lesson in life to both of them.

I'm assuming that since you mentioned that you live in the "expensive suburbs", money isn't too scarce. If this is true, offer his girlfriend a generous "reward" (of an amount she cannot refuse) if she succeeds in convincing your son to shave and stay shaved.

Make sure she understands that this is NOT a bribe, and that it is contingent on her keeping the details of the coup in strict confidence. Also tell her that the reward money will be paid out in full a specific amount of weeks after the boy shaves. Be sure to tell her that the time period is for your assurance that all of the conditions have been met. When the time comes, be sure to pay her promptly.

Now, the important part:
Whether or not you succeed with the shave matters little as long as you take the time afterwards to explain to the kids that what they just experienced was a real world example of the ugly reality of human tendency and politics in our society; whether it be of business/corporate in nature or in government, this is an example of what some people are willing to do in order to serve their own interests and greed, and how easy it is to fall into such a trap.

It will be a valuable lesson in life that will have them prepared in a way that no textbook or classroom could ever achieve!

 

[lucrioual]

HAHAHAHAAHHA!!!!!
yea, take stuff from him
tell him that he'll get some from girls isf he shaves
otherwise, you grow a gandalf beard

 

[Pepsei]

Originally posted by: Shockwave

Originally posted by: Mnementh

Originally posted by: Chelsey
I wouldn't go out with a guy that looks like that. To me it shows lack of responsibility and personal grooming. Also, if he doesn't care about himself more than that, what good would he be in a relationship? Just my two cents, I'm a teenager.

This coming from the girl who doesn't want her boyfriend to get a job?????

Mnementh

She WHAT?! What kind of dumb *beep* doesnt want her b/f to get a job?! Jesus, nothing like sucking the tit of your parents till your 35 :roll:

Link to this idiocy?

lol, I was reading that with a scottish accent and with the word "teet"....

 

[Pex]

damn at 14 he has a beard? i didn tget facial hair till after nam back and i was 23..


















i never went to nam.

 

[FacelessNobody]

Thank you, Yukichigai, for being a voice of reason in this thread. The issue at hand is the kid's beard, not his future position in life because of something that grows on him. Even still, we'll expand on that . Making this kid submit and shave through coercion is not setting a good example. Yep, I said example. Kids will rarely do what you say, but they WILL do a lot of what you do. If a clean look is important to you, let it be important to you. Your child will pick up on it, and may come to appreciate it, if it is indeed for her/him. What do you teach your kid by forcing him to shave? Hard-liners would say discipline, obedience, and good ol' American appearance standards. That's fine...if you want an android for a child. How about you buy the kid what he needs to shave (blade razor, cream, and a sideburns trimmer, beard trimmer maybe) and help him make the decision. Teach him that you trust him.

FYI, that is the approach my parents took. I was growing a moustache at 14. I promptly shaved it off because it made me look like a gay cop , though now I frequently change my appearance.