I can't really feel sorry for you after you battered him.
In the eye of the law you are just as guilty as him. Not sure of the open vs. closed fist part of Cali Penal Code(not sure if it even exists in your state), but by the simple definition of their idea of battery, you committed a crime too. I'm with tnitsuj, you both should go to jail if you hit him as well. I don't what "look" he had on his eyes. You should have extricated yourself from the situation and called the police if you were scared. You escalated the situation by slapping him. If you have made a report to the police, you better hope he doesn't tell them about you slapping him. If so they will probably arrest you as well. Part of the reason domestic violence happens is because of the escalation of force. You slapped him and he escalated right back! How can you expect the police to arrest him and not you?
In the eye of the law you are just as guilty as him. Not sure of the open vs. closed fist part of Cali Penal Code(not sure if it even exists in your state), but by the simple definition of their idea of battery, you committed a crime too. I'm with tnitsuj, you both should go to jail if you hit him as well. I don't what "look" he had on his eyes. You should have extricated yourself from the situation and called the police if you were scared. You escalated the situation by slapping him. If you have made a report to the police, you better hope he doesn't tell them about you slapping him. If so they will probably arrest you as well. Part of the reason domestic violence happens is because of the escalation of force. You slapped him and he escalated right back! How can you expect the police to arrest him and not you?
Yeah, of course you arrest them both. No, I'm not in law enforcement(justint is however), but I'm a CJ major with some education in this area. I don't have near the expertise or experience that Justin has, but I'm sure his assessment will be dead on. She escalated a verbal situation into physical violence. That's a huge reason domestic violence happens. One partner or "ex-partner" escalates a verbal disagreement into a physical one. Whether it is a shove, a grab, a slap, etc.
dartworth
Lifer
- Jul 29, 2001
- 15,201
- 10
- 81
It's called mutual battery or some derivation of same in different jurisdictions. You would both have been arrested and charged if the officers had responded at the time. After the fact, it becomes more complicated. The best advice I can give you right now is to have no contact with this person at all...but you probably won't do that. I am a bit jaded in regards to these situations and have little tolerance left for them.
Not sure about a mutual battery statute in the Cali Penal code, but they don't like domestic violence. They increase the fines and sentence for it. That's why I say to call the police in any incident like this, and make sure your piece of the fight is clean physically. It is a very tough lesson to learn, but you can't hit someone you have or had a sexual or dating relationship with. Regardless of the fervor of the verbal abuse, you can walk away and call the police if you are in fear. If he tried to grab you then you would have been in the clear. By initiating the action, there is a good chance you could or will be charged. I'd contact the police and cancel the report if I were you. I'd say you decided to not have it investigated, that you changed you mind, and that you apologize for wasting their time. Just hope that department or the state law doesn't REQUIRE an arrest or investigation in this case. Many do now because people are afraid to make reports, or they make fake reports to get back at someone. I'd hope you can call and retract it. After you do so never talk to that guy again. You two are bad for each other.
e) (1) When a battery is committed against a spouse, a person
with whom the defendant is cohabiting, a person who is the parent of
the defendant's child, former spouse, fiance, or fiancee, or a person
with whom the defendant currently has, or has previously had, a
dating or engagement relationship, the battery is punishable by a
fine not exceeding two thousand dollars ($2,000), or by imprisonment
in a county jail for a period of not more than one year, or by both
that fine and imprisonment. If probation is granted, or the
execution or imposition of the sentence is suspended, it shall be a
condition thereof that the defendant participate in, for no less than
one year, and successfully complete, a batterer's treatment program,
as defined in Section 1203.097, or if none is available, another
appropriate counseling program designated by the court. However,
this provision shall not be construed as requiring a city, a county,
or a city and county to provide a new program or higher level of
service as contemplated by Section 6 of Article XIIIB of the
California Constitution.
e) (1) When a battery is committed against a spouse, a person
with whom the defendant is cohabiting, a person who is the parent of
the defendant's child, former spouse, fiance, or fiancee, or a person
with whom the defendant currently has, or has previously had, a
dating or engagement relationship, the battery is punishable by a
fine not exceeding two thousand dollars ($2,000), or by imprisonment
in a county jail for a period of not more than one year, or by both
that fine and imprisonment. If probation is granted, or the
execution or imposition of the sentence is suspended, it shall be a
condition thereof that the defendant participate in, for no less than
one year, and successfully complete, a batterer's treatment program,
as defined in Section 1203.097, or if none is available, another
appropriate counseling program designated by the court. However,
this provision shall not be construed as requiring a city, a county,
or a city and county to provide a new program or higher level of
service as contemplated by Section 6 of Article XIIIB of the
California Constitution.
Why don't you just go down to the police statoin, they'll explain it to now. It's not like everybody here has filed a police report before.
--GiLtY
--GiLtY
I didn't realize that she had actually contacted the local police. Dezign you now officially have a serious problem. In my jurisdiction this would be assigned to the detectives who would have very little discretion in this case, I don't really know about California but I wouldn't take any chances. I hate giving advice beyond not having contact with this individual, but you need to consider seriously getting a lawyer and having him or her take over from here. Did you already give the police the same statement you gave us?
A lawyer will handle any further statements/affidavits etc. and keep you from hanging yourself. A lawyer will also make it easier to get a protective order. You need to stop talking!!!!
actually its called battery assult is when you raise your hand before hitting that person once u hit that person it becomes battery
Unless you are willing to risk arrest and charges as well (you did hit him first) I would forget the whole incident and not put yourself in situations like that again.
The police will not make this situation any better and by the sounds of it you really don't need a restraining order but maybe just need to apply a little common sense. He is an ex-bf which means you do not talk to him, you do not let him sleep over, you do not let him do favors like drive you to the airport, and you don't hit him. You invited him into your house and I would suggest you not do it again. The hurt pride you feel now will not get better by spending time hanging out in police stations or courts.
Good luck.
The police will not make this situation any better and by the sounds of it you really don't need a restraining order but maybe just need to apply a little common sense. He is an ex-bf which means you do not talk to him, you do not let him sleep over, you do not let him do favors like drive you to the airport, and you don't hit him. You invited him into your house and I would suggest you not do it again. The hurt pride you feel now will not get better by spending time hanging out in police stations or courts.
Good luck.
If I was a cop I would arrest dezign for assault! Don't hit people expecting them to not hit you back!
Dezign I am sorry to hear you got hurt. No man should ever hit a woman like that. That said, you certainly put yourself in an extremely foolish position. You let your ex, A KNOWN PSYCHO, spend the night. Did you think he was gonna be cool with just being your buddy? You should have gotten your money from him and said "have a nice life." It was also extremely foolish to slap him. For someone who seems pretty smart, you certainly do some dumb stuff.
It's really interesting to see cases like this on this board, among a few others that I frequent. I can say with almost dead certainty whom will come out of the woodwork and say what.
You inevitably have the majority of AT'ers, who simply come forward and offer their condolences, "I'm sorry that happened", and offer nothing deeper or more constructive than that - rightfully so, for it is a comment made in passing, in every sense.
You have the majority of the remainder, young men with a superhero complex - "Oh, if I were there I'd kick his ass and everyone elses', then we'd go and pet small puppies and talk about our feelings." As if this impresses her or anyone else, as if it compensates in any way for those persons' own unfulfilled dreams of self-respect or physical self-confidence. Guess what, guys, you're not gonna get Dezign in the sack by being her intarweb hero.
At least, not from what I've seen. We can talk about her love life later. And I'm sure we all will.
Then you have the remaining, relatively small group, which mainly consists of women haters, men too bitter in their hatred of the women who spurned or scarred them to take an objective or even healthy look at anything involving breasts or a vagina.
What's left? Those who try to boil the situation down to a few key points, future lawyers and police officers.
Ah, joy. Enjoy your evening, folks. Hope Dezign comes back and hangs out with us someday, after this mess is over with and both their sins have been atoned for.
Cheers!
Nate
You inevitably have the majority of AT'ers, who simply come forward and offer their condolences, "I'm sorry that happened", and offer nothing deeper or more constructive than that - rightfully so, for it is a comment made in passing, in every sense.
You have the majority of the remainder, young men with a superhero complex - "Oh, if I were there I'd kick his ass and everyone elses', then we'd go and pet small puppies and talk about our feelings." As if this impresses her or anyone else, as if it compensates in any way for those persons' own unfulfilled dreams of self-respect or physical self-confidence. Guess what, guys, you're not gonna get Dezign in the sack by being her intarweb hero.
At least, not from what I've seen. We can talk about her love life later. And I'm sure we all will.
Then you have the remaining, relatively small group, which mainly consists of women haters, men too bitter in their hatred of the women who spurned or scarred them to take an objective or even healthy look at anything involving breasts or a vagina.
What's left? Those who try to boil the situation down to a few key points, future lawyers and police officers.
Ah, joy. Enjoy your evening, folks. Hope Dezign comes back and hangs out with us someday, after this mess is over with and both their sins have been atoned for.
Cheers!
Nate
Originally posted by: Ciber
Was only a matter of time till you became the victim of your own stupidity.
i shudnt say this in this thread but
PWN3D
.j/k dezign
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