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Girlfriend in her first week of college. 3 Year relationship.

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Be prepared to lose her. You're pretty much the only guy she's known and now that's she's away from home and you, she's going to experiment with lots of things.
 
Ignore everything in this thread. Most of the responders are idiots. From the sound of it, she is probably just get wasted with her friends at some lame house party.

Now the correct answer here is to go party with her, since you are only a mile apart.. (i have seen nothing about update in the op, assuming nothing major has developed.)
 
Shame that everyone's right about college and drinking. Had a retarded mandatory school camp that was really out in the woods, and everyone showed their true colors. All the 'cool' people peer pressured all the 'toned' down people into drinking; the ones who didn't even drink started funneling. Many others were indirectly pressured into it just to be cool as well. Meanwhile, I finally realized how happy I am to be sitting on the sidelines than acting like a crazy drunk just to fit in.
 
Originally posted by: miketheidiot
Ignore everything in this thread. Most of the responders are idiots. From the sound of it, she is probably just get wasted with her friends at some lame house party.

Now the correct answer here is to go party with her, since you are only a mile apart.. (i have seen nothing about update in the op, assuming nothing major has developed.)
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Wow..."Ignore everything in this thread. Most of the responders are idiots" eh?

Your name is MIKETHEIDIOT! :Q You just owned yourself with a watermelon up the anus. How's it feel?
 
Originally posted by: MichaelD
Originally posted by: miketheidiot
Ignore everything in this thread. Most of the responders are idiots. From the sound of it, she is probably just get wasted with her friends at some lame house party.

Now the correct answer here is to go party with her, since you are only a mile apart.. (i have seen nothing about update in the op, assuming nothing major has developed.)
Click to expand...

Wow..."Ignore everything in this thread. Most of the responders are idiots" eh?

Your name is MIKETHEIDIOT! :Q You just owned yourself with a watermelon up the anus. How's it feel?
Click to expand...
Great response.
 
Originally posted by: mattjbak
I met my current girlfriend as a senior in highschool while she was a freshman. The relationship developed, and we decided to keep it going. So far we have lived through 3 years 6 hours apart (more than it seems). This year, she's off to college, UCSB (Santa Barbara). She's a fairly innocent girl in some aspects... she has drank twice, both times with me. Each time she was a completely different person to the point where I just wanted to be sober and take care of her. Now she's expressing a big time desire to go out and drink. It's the first night and she's already out and drunk (could tell by the incoherent call). I think it might just be a curiousity thing, but it worries me a bit, mainly because I don't really know that person she becomes while drunk. My freshman year I kept it cool on the partying because she was uncomfortable, but the situation that is developing is that she expects me to just deal with it.

EDIT: to clarify, we spent countless weekends with her up here or me down there, and all the summers together, along with that last year of high school.

I don't know what to think here, am I crazy? I really am looking for serious insight into this from people's experiences. Flame if you must, but I don't think I'm being too irrational, as I really love this girl.
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Girls gone Wild.

Drunk girls on tape.

etc
 
If she doesn't stop drinking so much then you have a problem on your hands...
There are girls out there that can get wasted frequently and do pretty darn well in schools. Don't know about loyalty in these situations though.
 
Well as an update... she's decided, after a night of partying, that she doesn't want to be out on weekdays ever after the quarter starts, and at most one night of the weekends. We'll see how that goes. AND NO, I didn't do a thing to influence her decision, I'd rather have things go bad now then, say 5-10 years from now, obviously.
 
ahahah people on atot are so funny. many of my friends (myself included) have gone through/go to college without partying/drinking/going crazy. people here are so pessimistic and assertive...perhaps from bitterness, which i understand, but overwhelmingly so.

typical, assertive atot answer to this: you must be a loser. 🙂
 
freshman chicks w/ or w/out bfs walk around like they have a bullseye on their ass (they really do have 1). it's sooooo easy. SO SO easy to bag em. Anyway, she's been had or is about to be had... or dude from ur hs banged her. I'm telling u bad things are on the horizon.


Hopefully it all works out though. I wish you the best.
 
Originally posted by: necine
freshman chicks w/ or w/out bfs walk around like they have a bullseye on their ass (they really do have 1). it's sooooo easy. SO SO easy to bag em. Anyway, she's been had or is about to be had... or dude from ur hs banged her. I'm telling u bad things are on the horizon.


Hopefully it all works out though. I wish you the best.
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spoken with so much truth I can't comment any further.

My favorite line to use on these ducks was....

"I'm here, he isn't. Doesn't that feel nice? C'mon now, just have fun, we're in college now and you have the freedoom to do what you want. Feel that yearning for something else? Feel that freedom!!!? That ability to finally be your own self instead of being some guys girl trying to conform to his wishes? Don't let that guy hold you back!"

works everytime.
 
For whatever it's worth, keep an open mind. It could go either way - I've known a relationship that worked out like this before. I've known dozens that didn't. If it doesn't go your way, which it probably won't regardless of anything she says, don't take it too personally. This happens to a LOT of people every day and it's not a reflection on you - it's a reflection on her and the choices she feels compelled to make at this age and situation. Remember that you have a whole life ahead of you and thousands of experiences on the horizon. Try to stay excited about the future, whatever it is, and as hard as it's going to be try to keep this all in perspective - it's not the end of the world, just the end of your high school romance.

My $.02.

In the meantime make sure to enjoy the weekend visitation sex - it doesn't get much better than that.
 
Just play it by ear. If you sense that the two of you are slowly becoming more distant, then you should expect to breakup. But if the two of you still have the same relationship, then let her have fun. Don't be such a mom about it, just be confident that if she is really serious about the relationship, then having a few drinks will not change her mind.

 
Originally posted by: mattjbak

I didn't have a dead social life at college, but I definitely toned things down for her. I really don't think she's going crazy partying, but we'll see. And yes, a lot of weekends were spent with her going down and me coming up. We also had all of that last year of high school.
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TMI..
 
Originally posted by: mattjbak
Originally posted by: HeroOfPellinor
Quick. Propose!!
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That is the ultimate controlling move, no thanks. It's obvious it would be a bad choice at this time.
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Good job of ignoring all these losers. Just give her space is she needs it, it won't be hard to tell what she is doing, if she really loves you or not. Just don't be worried, and don't play it safe. If you are gonna do this thing right, then go all out for it. Not going all out, or doing what most of these people say, is just giving her a reason to leave. Good luck.
 
Here is how it is going to go down...

1. She is going to meet new people and everyone will be celebrating their newly found life away from "adults."
2. She is going to drink and party.
3. She will start to wonder how she could have so much fun away from you.
4. She may stray.
5. Next thing you know there's change missing from your dresser and your daughter's knocked up. I've seen it a hundred times.

Ok I lied about #5.

BUT... The good news is if you really are a great guy, she will come back. She will realize it doesn't get better than you and she will return. This is where the good part comes in. Yes, you will hurt. You will lock yourself in your apartment for a week but then you will emerge. You will go out. YOU will meet other womenz and YOU will see what else is out there. If you find the new is better than the old then so be it. But either way you both will be better people for having "experienced" life.

Like you said, it is MUCH better to "experience" life in your college years than when you are 40 with 3 kids and a mortgage.
 
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