JulesMaximus
No Lifer
- Jul 3, 2003
- 74,590
- 986
- 126
Inspector Jihad
Lifer
- Apr 17, 2005
- 13,465
- 3
- 81
both parents need to be on the same page in dealing with this.
Set specific and clear guidelines, with identified results; privleges are retained or removed. Once the guidelines are set, stick to them.
Discussion with the police doesn't necessarily mean an official report will result. Depending on your police force, an officer may be invited to the home to have a little "heart-to-heart" discussion with the teenager, which should include discussions on what will happen to the teenager if the mother even gets a bruise from dropping a plate on her foot!! At the same time, the parents need to support the police in this, and allow the officer to have an honest "attitude adjustment" conversation with their son.
Consistency is key; once they have identified the process they have to stick with it. We had a problem with one of our foster kids and after running through the range of responses, he came home one day and his room was stripped clean......no bed, no dresser, no electronics, nothing. at night he was given a blanket and pillow. gradually he earned the right to have a bed again, then the other privleges. All the kids that come in our house know the rules and whether they are guests, friends, fosters, adopted, biological, the rules are the same. And yes, the rules work both ways, we don't ask the kids to do anything that doesn't apply to us also.
we also had a system with a few other families that we could use. A friend who is a hog farmer loved having "company" for a couple days. Nothing like a few days of working in hog barns, getting up at the grey hours and working harder then they had ever worked before. the kids came back with a new appreciation of life.
this situation can be salvaged, but it will not be easy; they have to stick to it.
if he ever hit the mother again, there should be a good police report attached to his trip to the ER, explaining why he was bounced off a wall, dragged down the steps, and ejected out the front door, with a size 11 boot print on his backside.
Set specific and clear guidelines, with identified results; privleges are retained or removed. Once the guidelines are set, stick to them.
Discussion with the police doesn't necessarily mean an official report will result. Depending on your police force, an officer may be invited to the home to have a little "heart-to-heart" discussion with the teenager, which should include discussions on what will happen to the teenager if the mother even gets a bruise from dropping a plate on her foot!! At the same time, the parents need to support the police in this, and allow the officer to have an honest "attitude adjustment" conversation with their son.
Consistency is key; once they have identified the process they have to stick with it. We had a problem with one of our foster kids and after running through the range of responses, he came home one day and his room was stripped clean......no bed, no dresser, no electronics, nothing. at night he was given a blanket and pillow. gradually he earned the right to have a bed again, then the other privleges. All the kids that come in our house know the rules and whether they are guests, friends, fosters, adopted, biological, the rules are the same. And yes, the rules work both ways, we don't ask the kids to do anything that doesn't apply to us also.
we also had a system with a few other families that we could use. A friend who is a hog farmer loved having "company" for a couple days. Nothing like a few days of working in hog barns, getting up at the grey hours and working harder then they had ever worked before. the kids came back with a new appreciation of life.
this situation can be salvaged, but it will not be easy; they have to stick to it.
if he ever hit the mother again, there should be a good police report attached to his trip to the ER, explaining why he was bounced off a wall, dragged down the steps, and ejected out the front door, with a size 11 boot print on his backside.
In most situations I'd say violence isn't the answer, and to just throw his ass out. Giving him the opportunity to shoot people from another country is fucking retarded, too, so don't listen to that idiot.
But in this case, he beat his mother... Kick the little shits ass.
But in this case, he beat his mother... Kick the little shits ass.
NikolaeVarius
Lifer
- Oct 25, 2006
- 11,036
- 11
- 91
Hmm, I know how it feels, I guess. Except, I haven't gone crazy...yet.
All I can say is that he needs discipline. Therapist is one thing, but it might not be enough. He needs some good old fashioned shipped off to Korea to get his ass beat by a instructor type training. That straightens people up, it did for me.
All I can say is that he needs discipline. Therapist is one thing, but it might not be enough. He needs some good old fashioned shipped off to Korea to get his ass beat by a instructor type training. That straightens people up, it did for me.
Skunkwourk
Diamond Member
- Dec 9, 2004
- 4,662
- 1
- 81
I used to be similar to this kid. I played addicting MMOs through highschool without any care in the world about my future. I would get sorta pissy at any interruptions to my gaming.
I quickly realized how pathetic I was when I got a 2.2 GPA in my first semester of college. I joined the Air force Reserve and am now a pre-med who makes straight A's.
What he needs to do is realize by himself that these video games are a complete waste of time.
I quickly realized how pathetic I was when I got a 2.2 GPA in my first semester of college. I joined the Air force Reserve and am now a pre-med who makes straight A's.
What he needs to do is realize by himself that these video games are a complete waste of time.
AMDZen
Lifer
- Apr 15, 2004
- 12,589
- 0
- 76
So I'm assuming his parents are rich doctors and bought him a $10,000 Alienware computer at 15 yo and a BMW 318i when he turned 16 yo?
Sounds like the parents are about as much a waste of skin as he is, you say they are strict but they obviously weren't very. At this point they are just being dumb for not calling the cops on his a$$. Its sad really, the world has come down to this because of PC liberal hollywood types that think hitting kids is bad. So now you have to call the cops and let the state discipline your kids for you. Thats just the way the world works now I guess, which is unfortunate because a good a$$ kicking would probably do him some good, but then the parent/s would be the ones disciplined by the state
Sounds like the parents are about as much a waste of skin as he is, you say they are strict but they obviously weren't very. At this point they are just being dumb for not calling the cops on his a$$. Its sad really, the world has come down to this because of PC liberal hollywood types that think hitting kids is bad. So now you have to call the cops and let the state discipline your kids for you. Thats just the way the world works now I guess, which is unfortunate because a good a$$ kicking would probably do him some good, but then the parent/s would be the ones disciplined by the state
Send him to trade school, welding/machining/automotive repair/pipe fitting/whatever.
Academics isn't for everyone, try to force a kid who has no interest or aptitude into this and you'll get bad results.
No excuse for his behavior, of course, but maybe it's time for mom and dad to give up on their dream of sending him to med school.
Academics isn't for everyone, try to force a kid who has no interest or aptitude into this and you'll get bad results.
No excuse for his behavior, of course, but maybe it's time for mom and dad to give up on their dream of sending him to med school.
He's 17? Too late for spanking. I'd say his last chance is to send him to military school before he turns 18.
no offense to any koreans, but many korean males have some anger issues. i say you call the cops.
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