Game of Thrones - TV Series (NO BOOK SPOILERS)

[Phoenix86]

The Starks didn't want the Iron Borne as allies, they just wanted them to stop being fucking cunts. Shortly after Robert's rebellion, the Iron Isles took up another rebellion. They don't bend the knee and pay the iron price for everything. The only reason they stopped was because Ned killed two of his sons and took Theon as a ward (hostage). With the country at war, he decided to go rampaging again. Stannis won't tolerate that shit, same as Ned wouldn't.

Now, it might be a good strategic place to launch ships at King's Landing, but Stannis already has areas for that; he did it on Blackwater Bay.

Yes, they did. That's why Theon was sent back to the Iron Isles in the first place, to bargain for their navy. Theon gave a whole speech about how Robb was fighting for the same thing his dad wanted, a north free from King's Landing's rule. Theon's dad argued that he was playing lap dog for the Starks, and that ultimately pushed Theon to take Winterfell.

I'm sure they also wanted them to stop being cunts, but that wasn't related to their need for navy.

 

[Phoenix86]

Ha!

If this were any other show...

Just because the hero doesn't win, doesn't mean the villain does. It's not so much Theon will win, more than Ramsay will lose.

Everyone loses eventually.

 

[JM Aggie08]

Man, those last five minutes were rough. I was delusional in thinking Ramsay would take it easy on her for small grace period.

 

[smackababy]

Yes, they did. That's why Theon was sent back to the Iron Isles in the first place, to bargain for their navy. Theon gave a whole speech about how Robb was fighting for the same thing his dad wanted, a north free from King's Landing's rule. Theon's dad argued that he was playing lap dog for the Starks, and that ultimately pushed Theon to take Winterfell.

I'm sure they also wanted them to stop being cunts, but that wasn't related to their need for navy.

That was Theon's doing and Robb being fairly naive on how exactly large of cunts the Iron Borne are. He grew up with Theon and didn't really understand why he was a ward of Ned Stark. Since Ned was honorable and not a terrible person, he actually treated Theon as a ward and not a hostage, but he was a hostage regardless. Theon's father happened to be particularly stupid and decided to pillage the north and lost his last heir because of it.

 

[Phoenix86]

That was Theon's doing and Robb being fairly naive on how exactly large of cunts the Iron Borne are. He grew up with Theon and didn't really understand why he was a ward of Ned Stark. Since Ned was honorable and not a terrible person, he actually treated Theon as a ward and not a hostage, but he was a hostage regardless. Theon's father happened to be particularly stupid and decided to pillage the north and lost his last heir because of it.

Yet they still wanted them as allies, for their navy... Stannis could possibly need that navy (if he loses his current one), just like Robb , which was the original point.

 

[Printer Bandit]

Sansa raper needs to be dispatched.

 

[dainthomas]

I think we can safely dispense with "no book spoilers" in the thread title now. Other than character and place names, it bears little resemblance at this point.

Seeing Mr Eko from Lost was cool, though. We just need Benioff and Weiss to break out the smoke monster to kill Ramsay.

 

[smackababy]

I think we can safely dispense with "no book spoilers" in the thread title now. Other than character and place names, it bears little resemblance at this point.

Seeing Mr Eko from Lost was cool, though. We just need Benioff and Weiss to break out the smoke monster to kill Ramsay.

That is not true at all. I could still easily spoil some big stuff that has yet to air.

In regards to some things though, (Winterfell / Sansa) this is all show writer new material. So, don't blame GRRM Sansa got the rape.

 

[Phoenix86]

Sansa raper needs to be dispatched.

While it's pretty fucking clear she didn't want to be there, I think rape is a bit of a stretch. If you call that rape, I guess most arranged marriages in this setting would be rape because most ladies are forced to marry.

He's a sadist, not rapist.

edit: before I get skewered, yes, our definition of rape would easily classify Ramsay a rapist. In GoT setting however, it wouldn't.

 

[CZroe]

The Dorne king watching over the water gardens referred to Myrcella as a Lannister. Isn't her last name officially supposed to be Baratheon?

While it's pretty fucking clear she didn't want to be there, I think rape is a bit of a stretch. If you call that rape, I guess most arranged marriages in this setting would be rape because most ladies are forced to marry.

He's a sadist, not rapist.

edit: before I get skewered, yes, our definition of rape would easily classify Ramsay a rapist. In GoT setting however, it wouldn't.

Especially because their marriages are supposed to be consummated on the wedding night to be confirmed.

 

[smackababy]

Especially because their marriages are supposed to be consummated on the wedding night to be confirmed.

I was rather surprised there wasn't a bedding ceremony. Seems rather unshrewd of Roose to not ensure the marriage was official.

 

[Skel]

While it's pretty fucking clear she didn't want to be there, I think rape is a bit of a stretch. If you call that rape, I guess most arranged marriages in this setting would be rape because most ladies are forced to marry.

He's a sadist, not rapist.

edit: before I get skewered, yes, our definition of rape would easily classify Ramsay a rapist. In GoT setting however, it wouldn't.

While he may not be considered a rapist in the Sansa setting, I'm willing to bet he's probably one anyways. I do feel for Sansa bit though, poor girl was destined to be with a psycho it seems. It may work out for her though, the last girl on the show that was raped/wasn't raped by GoT standards got dragons and a kingdom.

 

[GasX]

While he may not be considered a rapist in the Sansa setting, I'm willing to bet he's probably one anyways. I do feel for Sansa bit though, poor girl was destined to be with a psycho it seems. It may work out for her though, the last girl on the show that was raped/wasn't raped by GoT standards got dragons and a kingdom.

dragons - yes
kingdom - no

 

[cronos]

Anyone else think that the palace fight was terribly choreographed? I don't usually pay attention to these things in detail but last night the fight felt really sluggish and awkward. I'm not sure exactly why.

 

[CZroe]

Anyone else think that the palace fight was terribly choreographed? I don't usually pay attention to these things in detail but last night the fight felt really sluggish and awkward. I'm not sure exactly why.

Yes. All the cuts to hide mistakes/avoid reshoot a were obvious.

 

[Ichinisan]

Anyone else think that the palace fight was terribly choreographed? I don't usually pay attention to these things in detail but last night the fight felt really sluggish and awkward. I'm not sure exactly why.

Ah, yes. I actually said this out loud just after it concluded.

Some cuts occurred for no apparent reason for a second or so, then cut right back to the scene it cut away from as if it had been paused / frozen during the cut-away. Then I just wonder why it cut away at all. It was just...bad.

 

[Phoenix86]

While he may not be considered a rapist in the Sansa setting, I'm willing to bet he's probably one anyways. I do feel for Sansa bit though, poor girl was destined to be with a psycho it seems. It may work out for her though, the last girl on the show that was raped/wasn't raped by GoT standards got dragons and a kingdom.

Oh I could see it in his character for sure, sadist->rapist isn't a big jump at all.

There was also the Cersei/Jaimie rape/not rape at Joffrey's wake , things still going good for them so far. Jaime might be in trouble I guess.

 

[Phoenix86]

Ah, yes. I actually said this out loud just after it concluded.

Some cuts occurred for no apparent reason for a second or so, then cut right back to the scene it cut away from as if it had been paused / frozen during the cut-away. Then I just wonder why it cut away at all. It was just...bad.

Both of the scenes with those actresses have been bad, not that I think it's their fault, but the writing and fight choreography.

 

[zinfamous]

Anyone else think that the palace fight was terribly choreographed? I don't usually pay attention to these things in detail but last night the fight felt really sluggish and awkward. I'm not sure exactly why.

worst fight in most any kind of entertainment that I've recently seen.

 

[manimal]

worst fight in most any kind of entertainment that I've recently seen.

literally every time any of those sand chicks are on the show dies like nothing else. Whover cast those girls should be fired.

Lots of tension in this episode. Most of it was fairly predictable though.


No way Theon grows a pair there.

 

[The Boston Dangler]

"unbowed, unbent, unbroken" recap

house of black and white, pt1
this entire setting has been pretty frustrating for me. too slow, and lots of...nothing. what little has happened has no context. what's the point of arya being lied to? what's the point of arya lying?

valyria, pt1
a decent exchange between tyrion and jorah. jorah must have the fewest lines of any main character on this show.

house of black and white, pt2
why did we leave? the previous scene was 3 minutes of setup for another story, and then we're right back here? this makes me think weiss and benioff are trying to make up for the dropoff in stories and characters from the early seasons, much like padding an only 50 minute show with 2 minutes of "previously on...".

anyway, the father brings his sick daughter to jonestown springs. arya then starts lying her ass off before giving the girl the water of death. somehow, she's passed a test and is ready for level 3. did the hall of heads remind anyone else of futurama?

valyria, pt2
again, why did we leave? just for the pleasure of returning? tyrion and jorah are continuing a very worthwhile exchange when rudely interrupted by a gang of slavers. isn't that just the way? you know, jorah could have avoided capture just by showing them the grayscale. but zombie lepers are boring, so off to the fighting pits!

king's landing, pt1
lancel was going to arrest baelish, until baelish says he's working for cersei. funny how someone goes from sinner to ally of the gods so quickly.

"one's choice of companion is a curious thing." that means you, the only other person in this room, fucking your brother

baelish wants winterfell (and sansa, and everthing else. he already controls harrenhal and the vale) and he knows stannis on the throne would be a wipeout of all his efforts. taking the knights of the vale (which is somehow his army?) against stannis/roose theorhetically gains him winterfell and the north while keeping the crumbling lannisters in the throne for a bit longer.

water gardens
myrcella is a babe! anyway, eveyone gets to her at the exact same time after this story unfolded for weeks. bronn knocks tristain the fuck out and mycella is like "you hurt him!" please, that doesn't even qualify as an injury in game of thrones.

what follows next is, without a doubt, the very worst fight scene ever in game of thrones. it's hard to believe this is the same show that gave us brienne v hound, wildlings v castle black, stannis v king's landing, and others. ellaria sand has very quickly completed the shae cycle, going from an interesting woman character to a one-note bitch that just brings the show to a cheesey halt. and any scene with the sand snakes is going to be even worse than the last, mark my words. my "favorite" part of this travesty was when double knife girl gets kicked on and over her ass, then the footage is poorly cut and maybe reversed to show her flipping back up. it's my favorite because it reminds me of the original star wars butchery where han dodges greedo's shot with the most unnatural-looking move ever.

king's landing, pt2
"you can smell the shit from 5 miles away!" i love her

the only other person to speak to cersei like this was her father, although the segue into this scene was not up to GoT standards. tommen remains paralyzed by naivete and maybe just stupidity. the king's wife is dragged away to the dungeons and the king just sits there with an open mouth. the one thing he did was hold his royal guards back from ending this once and for all D:

winterfell
miranda's attempt at scaring sansa is super clumsy, and sansa calls her on it. after all she's been through, she's supposed to be intimidated by that? ha! theon/reek is to walk sansa down the aisle, reuniting the characters in the mid/late stages of their opposite metamorphosis.

it was a very nice setting for the wedding, although it didn't feel like a wedding for westeros royalty. at first i thought it was a pre-wedding ceremony, but nope it's the wedding. ramsay wastes no time indulging in his sadism, which was a bit sad imo. sansa is filet mignon, wasted on a mangey mutt like that. oh, well...welcome to being a woman in game of thrones. i'm going guess the winterfell commoners will slip sansa pennyroyal tea.

 

[zinfamous]

what follows next is, without a doubt, the very worst fight scene ever in game of thrones. it's hard to believe this is the same show that gave us brienne v hound, wildlings v castle black, stannis v king's landing, and others. ellaria sand has very quickly completed the shae cycle, going from an interesting woman character to a one-note bitch that just brings the show to a cheesey halt. and any scene with the sand snakes is going to be even worse than the last, mark my words. my "favorite" part of this travesty was when double knife girl gets kicked on and over her ass, then the footage is poorly cut and maybe reversed to show her flipping back up. it's my favorite because it reminds me of the original star wars butchery where han dodges greedo's shot with the most unnatural-looking move ever.

Oh yeah--I see what you did there. I SEE IT!

but seriously, no one else is as intrigued as I am by the existence of a cock merchant?

really?

is there a tit merchant?

 

[CZroe]

"unbowed, unbent, unbroken" recap

house of black and white, pt1
this entire setting has been pretty frustrating for me. too slow, and lots of...nothing. what little has happened has no context. what's the point of arya being lied to? what's the point of arya lying?

pretty sure they were saying that to become no one you must be able to convince people that you are anyone. There may also be something like faking their death to truly move on and become "no one" (faceless).

valyria, pt1
a decent exchange between tyrion and jorah. jorah must have the fewest lines of any main character on this show.

house of black and white, pt2
why did we leave? the previous scene was 3 minutes of setup for another story, and then we're right back here? this makes me think weiss and benioff are trying to make up for the dropoff in stories and characters from the early seasons, much like padding an only 50 minute show with 2 minutes of "previously on...".

anyway, the father brings his sick daughter to jonestown springs. arya then starts lying her ass off before giving the girl the water of death. somehow, she's passed a test and is ready for level 3. did the hall of heads remind anyone else of futurama?

Reminded me of the skulls in the wall of the crypts in The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask.

valyria, pt2
again, why did we leave? just for the pleasure of returning? tyrion and jorah are continuing a very worthwhile exchange when rudely interrupted by a gang of slavers. isn't that just the way? you know, jorah could have avoided capture just by showing them the grayscale. but zombie lepers are boring, so off to the fighting pits!

Pretty sure the grayscale is going to be his way in, since Danny doesn't support slavery. "I'm going to die anyway. Let me fight."

king's landing
lancel was going to arrest baelish, until baelish says he's working for cersei. funny how someone goes from sinner to ally of the gods so quickly.

"one's choice of companion is a curious thing." that means you, the only other person in this room, fucking your brother

There's nothing in The Ten Commandments about that, though most Christians/Jews would consider it a sin, so their religion may be similarly vague on incest.

baelish wants winterfell (and sansa, and everthing else. he already controls harrenhal and the vale) and he knows stannis on the throne would be a wipeout of all his efforts. taking the knights of the vale (which is somehow his army?) against stannis/roose theorhetically gains him winterfell and the north while keeping the crumbling lannisters in the throne for a bit longer.

When his wife died suspiciously soon after their marriage, they became his.

 

[CZroe]

I've been noticing scenes in almost every episode where the FPS dips dramatically. At first I thought it was HBO Go acting funny but now I think it's some amateur editor who doesn't realize that you can't just play with the frame rate for no reason. That may explain the horrible editing in the fight scenes.

 

[Train]

When his wife died suspiciously soon after their marriage, they became his.

Technically being his and and willing to go conquer Winterfel for him are two different things.

I could really see things in the North playing out a hundred different ways. Which is probably right where GRRM wants us right now.