Wow, just wow. It seems like you've had every issue you could possibly have on your SGS4. However, I'd like to quote a couple of things:
I quickly realized that the text messaging interface is just as ugly and primitive as it was before compared to the iPhones interface. Why, oh why couldn't they give more customization choices for the overall look and feel of the keyboard by now? All the emoji come out black and white and most of the ones that were available on the iPhone are not even here! And no, I am not paying for an extra app to make the interface nicer, when I had all that by default on the iPhone.
Use a different keyboard. Use a different text messaging app.
You do realise you're on android now and you're not FORCED to use the stock apps, right?
And on dropped calls, I've worked in the same location for almost 3 years now and I've gone from a Desire Z, to a SGS2, then SGS3 and now a Note II. In between I've tested a few other things for work, etc (including some IP4s and I was forced to use a 3GS for 2 hours once - ugh!) and guess what? All of my phones have more or less dropped calls in exactly the same places. In exactly the same places I get the same levels of 3g covereage and then it switches over to 2g in more or less the same places at the back of my work.
The ONLY difference I've had is, as time has gone by, the strength of the 3g signal has slowly been pushed a little further deeper into my shop (probably a combination of mast upgrades and better software/hardware on the phones). I still drop calls in the same areas. Actually, if anything, the Note II is definitely the more reliable of all my phones (if only slightly).
Edit: And actually, on the point of calls dropping, do we even need to talk about how useless the antennas in the IP4 are? The 4S+ has great signal, but IP4 is pretty bad.
But I root and tweak my phones. I use bloat-free software* and custom kernels (AMAZING dev work has been done on the SGS3/Note II variants by a single awesome dev) and rarely have any problems that aren't caused by myself messing around with something. Of course Android lags. But do you know what iOS does? It PAUSES. Nobody else seems to notice this. Instead of just carrying out the task, iOS will pause for 100-500ms (or even a couple of seconds on the iPod touch 4th gen I used to have) and then carry out the animation at 60fps. Over all, Android is getting much faster for me, even if it does lag and jerk slightly.
*carrier bloat is a real issue which Google shouldn't tolerate! It could be messing up your phone, so you should investigate trying to clear some of it off.
And actually one last point: Most iPhones have issues at launch too. IP5 and 4S both had battery issues when they came out and various software issues. Why is it so much more of an issue when Android also has issues?
But I do think your phone may be defective though. You should look into swapping it out!
Hmm, ever wonder why the SGS phones always have blue by default? Because the blue colors are blown.
Nope, not for the SGS3/Note II (with custom software) and not for SGS4. SGS4 actually has an Adobe RGB mode and apparently even the standard colour profiles are pretty close to the correct blue point (just more saturated). Now, why don't you go and read up on how blue the "retina" display is?

Actually, if anything, the SGS3/Note II screens are... too green!
Edit:
http://www.displaymate.com/Galaxy_S4_ShootOut_1.htm <- SGS4 screen shoot out!