Found out secretary is skipping lunch because she can't afford food

[thirdlegstump]

My suggestion is to not do anything. It's not your concern.

 

[Eos]

Originally posted by: fbrdphreak

Originally posted by: Specop 007
What does she drive? Are her nails done? House or apartment? How big? Does she get child support? How many kids? Previous husband?

All great questions. Saw a woman at the grocery store using food stamps for the approved grocery items, pull out cash for cigarettes/booze/etc, and had her hair/nails all done :roll: igust; :|

Is it possible this woman at the store is a nail tech and does her own nails? Maybe?

 

[Gl4di4tor]

send her an anonymous gift basket filled with canned foods or something and say that its from a secret admirer in a tag, that way she feels good about herself and she'll have food.:thumbsup:

 

[DaShen]

The Raffle is a cool idea

 

[JEDI]

Originally posted by: krunchykrome

Originally posted by: JEDI
There are 3 managers with offices next to each other. She's not my mgr's secretary, but one of the other two. She's been there a little over a year. Lately, it hasnt been that busy in her dept, and her overtime hrs have been cut.

My Mgr's secretary mentions that because of the O/T cut, she's skipping ALOT of meals to save $. She has previous medical bills because of her daughter and uses the food $ for continuous medical bills. She's in her 30's and is a single mom. She's a nice person and my mgr's secretary wants to help.

She's asking for suggestions, but doesnt want to make it look like a handout.

I have no idea on how to make giving $/food and not look like a handout?!

Suggestions?

How much is your company/employees willing to help out?

My mgr's secretary has talked to a few people about this and they seem willing to chip in. However, my mgr's secretary doesnt want it seem like a handout. She's saying if she was in her shoes, she would be embarassed and/or too proud to take charity.

But I'm beginning to think the charity route is the way to go. Take up a collection, and give her a card with the cash in it. Nice, simple. Why complicate things with an excuse especially since this is a benovelant thing we;re doing?

 

[bctbct]

Originally posted by: JEDI

Originally posted by: krunchykrome

Originally posted by: JEDI
There are 3 managers with offices next to each other. She's not my mgr's secretary, but one of the other two. She's been there a little over a year. Lately, it hasnt been that busy in her dept, and her overtime hrs have been cut.

My Mgr's secretary mentions that because of the O/T cut, she's skipping ALOT of meals to save $. She has previous medical bills because of her daughter and uses the food $ for continuous medical bills. She's in her 30's and is a single mom. She's a nice person and my mgr's secretary wants to help.

She's asking for suggestions, but doesnt want to make it look like a handout.

I have no idea on how to make giving $/food and not look like a handout?!

Suggestions?

How much is your company/employees willing to help out?

My mgr's secretary has talked to a few people about this and they seem willing to chip in. However, my mgr's secretary doesnt want it seem like a handout. She's saying if she was in her shoes, she would be embarassed and/or too proud to take charity.

But I'm beginning to think the charity route is the way to go. Take up a collection, and give her a card with the cash in it. Nice, simple. Why complicate things with an excuse especially since this is a benovelant thing we;re doing?

bad idea IMO, what if she gets so humilated she cant return to work?

 

[theeedude]

Give her some protein after work

----------------------------------------
A little comon sense goes a long way.

It looks like you forget to take your weekly dosage.

Anandtech Moderator

 

[JEDI]

Originally posted by: theNEOone
these are all temporary solutions....

i forget the expression, but it's something like "give her a fish and she can eat for a day, teach her how to fish and she can eat for a lifetime."
=|

Yeah, that thought came to me too. Once her dept gets busy again, and she gets O/T again, she'll be fine.

But if it slows down again, we're back in the same boat.

 

[SmoochyTX]

Originally posted by: JEDI

Originally posted by: krunchykrome

Originally posted by: JEDI
There are 3 managers with offices next to each other. She's not my mgr's secretary, but one of the other two. She's been there a little over a year. Lately, it hasnt been that busy in her dept, and her overtime hrs have been cut.

My Mgr's secretary mentions that because of the O/T cut, she's skipping ALOT of meals to save $. She has previous medical bills because of her daughter and uses the food $ for continuous medical bills. She's in her 30's and is a single mom. She's a nice person and my mgr's secretary wants to help.

She's asking for suggestions, but doesnt want to make it look like a handout.

I have no idea on how to make giving $/food and not look like a handout?!

Suggestions?

How much is your company/employees willing to help out?

My mgr's secretary has talked to a few people about this and they seem willing to chip in. However, my mgr's secretary doesnt want it seem like a handout. She's saying if she was in her shoes, she would be embarassed and/or too proud to take charity.

But I'm beginning to think the charity route is the way to go. Take up a collection, and give her a card with the cash in it. Nice, simple. Why complicate things with an excuse especially since this is a benovelant thing we;re doing?

It's not a birthday party gift. So you give her a card with cash. What do you expect her to do? Cry? Run to the bathroom? Never return to work again?

I'm sure she wants her superiors to know all of this info. NOT. I know you think you're helping but if you do it that way she will more than likely feel ultimately ashamed and upset about how the others she works with know all about her financial situation than she will ever feel thankful. Also, it will never erase in her mind how her fellow co-workers there might feel about her in the future. And you know how stories get around right?

 

[SmoochyTX]

Originally posted by: senseamp
Give her some protein after work

You're disgusting. :|

I hope the mods do with you that they did to the others earlier in this thread.

 

[theeedude]

Originally posted by: SmoochyTX

Originally posted by: senseamp
Give her some protein after work

You're disgusting. :|

I hope the mods do with you that they did to the others earlier in this thread.

Thicker skin called. It wants you to grow it.

 

[SmoochyTX]

Originally posted by: senseamp

Originally posted by: SmoochyTX

Originally posted by: senseamp
Give her some protein after work

You're disgusting. :|

I hope the mods do with you that they did to the others earlier in this thread.

Thicker skin called. It wants you to grow it.

Empathy called. It wants you to find out what it means.

 

[theeedude]

Originally posted by: SmoochyTX

Originally posted by: senseamp

Originally posted by: SmoochyTX

Originally posted by: senseamp
Give her some protein after work

You're disgusting. :|

I hope the mods do with you that they did to the others earlier in this thread.

Thicker skin called. It wants you to grow it.

Empathy called. It wants you to find out what it means.

There is no lack of empathy in this thread. But definitely a lack of jokes!

 

[Cdubneeddeal]

Originally posted by: senseamp

Originally posted by: SmoochyTX

Originally posted by: senseamp
Give her some protein after work

You're disgusting. :|

I hope the mods do with you that they did to the others earlier in this thread.

Thicker skin called. It wants you to grow it.

Banning comes, you deserve it.

 

[theeedude]

Originally posted by: Cdubneeddeal

Originally posted by: senseamp

Originally posted by: SmoochyTX

Originally posted by: senseamp
Give her some protein after work

You're disgusting. :|

I hope the mods do with you that they did to the others earlier in this thread.

Thicker skin called. It wants you to grow it.

Banning comes, you deserve it.

Well, if it comes, it comes. Life goes on.

 

[JEDI]

Originally posted by: HomeBrewerDude
I would be wary of acting on any second hand information. You simply do not know the circumstance and nuance of her situation. Organizing anything at this point is stupid until you or someone else asks her about her needs. The subject could easily be broached by her supervisor... have him or her bring it up and asks if she is getting by. If so then leave it alone. If not, then you'll know what she really needs and you won't have to worry about her seeing through your schemes and getting offended.

ahhh... you think my mgr's secretary is being too helpful and the situation could easily turn bad?

 

[JEDI]

Originally posted by: ATLien247
I'd mind my own business. If I were in her position, and I needed help, I'd ask for it. I don't need any unsolicited handouts...

Some people may need it, but too proud to ask?

To some of the posters that ask about her spending habits:
I don't know what car she drives, the type of place she lives, if she has cable or not, etc.

sigh.. this is getting waaayyy complicated

 

[jagec]

Originally posted by: QueBert
Sounds like this lady at work is in need of all the help she can get, if she's too proud to ask, tell her to go check into donating Plasma.

I did the plasma thing too. I started to look like a junkie after a while, so I stopped, but the money was nice while it lasted. Can't beat the $$$/hr ratio for a walk-in, choose-your-own-hours "job".

Originally posted by: eos

Originally posted by: fbrdphreak
All great questions. Saw a woman at the grocery store using food stamps for the approved grocery items, pull out cash for cigarettes/booze/etc, and had her hair/nails all done :roll: igust; :|

Is it possible this woman at the store is a nail tech and does her own nails? Maybe?

She cuts her own hair too? And is buying the booze as a community service to all the underage drinkers out there?
Let's be fair, the odds are pretty good that she just spends more money than she has, and counts on the government to pick up the slack. Obviously I would require more proof if I was (say) in charge of determining eligibility, but it looks pretty bad, y'know?


It's true, with correct budgeting, you can stretch money almost as far as you like. I have friends who make five times what I do, and feel like they're just getting by. The fact of the matter is that Americans SUCK at budgeting. Everyone's loaded down with nonessential "essentials."

 

[JEDI]

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
My best friend is also in this position, she's rent poor and in spite of working multiple jobs is often too poor to eat.

I always seem to buy/bring wayyy more lunch than I can eat to work, she helps me to not waste food by sharing lunch with me

This sounds like a GREAT idea!

 

[intogamer]

My mom brings her own lunch... she rarely eats out

Not everybody goes out and eat for lunch

 

[JEDI]

Originally posted by: SmoochyTX

Originally posted by: JEDI

Originally posted by: krunchykrome

Originally posted by: JEDI
There are 3 managers with offices next to each other. She's not my mgr's secretary, but one of the other two. She's been there a little over a year. Lately, it hasnt been that busy in her dept, and her overtime hrs have been cut.

My Mgr's secretary mentions that because of the O/T cut, she's skipping ALOT of meals to save $. She has previous medical bills because of her daughter and uses the food $ for continuous medical bills. She's in her 30's and is a single mom. She's a nice person and my mgr's secretary wants to help.

She's asking for suggestions, but doesnt want to make it look like a handout.

I have no idea on how to make giving $/food and not look like a handout?!

Suggestions?

How much is your company/employees willing to help out?

My mgr's secretary has talked to a few people about this and they seem willing to chip in. However, my mgr's secretary doesnt want it seem like a handout. She's saying if she was in her shoes, she would be embarassed and/or too proud to take charity.

But I'm beginning to think the charity route is the way to go. Take up a collection, and give her a card with the cash in it. Nice, simple. Why complicate things with an excuse especially since this is a benovelant thing we;re doing?

It's not a birthday party gift. So you give her a card with cash. What do you expect her to do? Cry? Run to the bathroom? Never return to work again?

I'm sure she wants her superiors to know all of this info. NOT. I know you think you're helping but if you do it that way she will more than likely feel ultimately ashamed and upset about how the others she works with know all about her financial situation than she will ever feel thankful. Also, it will never erase in her mind how her fellow co-workers there might feel about her in the future. And you know how stories get around right?

I'm now thinking geekbabe's idea of buying/bringing in more food than you can eat sounds much better than the cash handout thing.

 

[theeedude]

Originally posted by: jagec

Originally posted by: QueBert
Sounds like this lady at work is in need of all the help she can get, if she's too proud to ask, tell her to go check into donating Plasma.

I did the plasma thing too. I started to look like a junkie after a while, so I stopped, but the money was nice while it lasted. Can't beat the $$$/hr ratio for a walk-in, choose-your-own-hours "job".

Originally posted by: eos

Originally posted by: fbrdphreak
All great questions. Saw a woman at the grocery store using food stamps for the approved grocery items, pull out cash for cigarettes/booze/etc, and had her hair/nails all done :roll: igust; :|

Is it possible this woman at the store is a nail tech and does her own nails? Maybe?

She cuts her own hair too? And is buying the booze as a community service to all the underage drinkers out there?
Let's be fair, the odds are pretty good that she just spends more money than she has, and counts on the government to pick up the slack. Obviously I would require more proof if I was (say) in charge of determining eligibility, but it looks pretty bad, y'know?


It's true, with correct budgeting, you can stretch money almost as far as you like. I have friends who make five times what I do, and feel like they're just getting by. The fact of the matter is that Americans SUCK at budgeting. Everyone's loaded down with nonessential "essentials."

It's probably a great shock, but people on foodstamps get haircuts and take care of their nails too. And some of them smoke and drink too. They are on foodstamps, not in a monastery.

 

[IHateMyJob2004]

She isn't family ....

 

[themusgrat]

Originally posted by: WolverineGator

Date her daughter (and pay for all the meals so the mom can afford to eat)?

I like this one

Anyways, I agree with some of the other people here, she doesn't have to get a $10 sub and Dr Pepper (never a coke), she could take a $.50 or so homemade sandwich to work. I'm not against gving her some monetary form of help, but I doubt you want to become her source of food. Think about it, if she starts getting money, then starts depending on it, then the money stops, then she is probably worse off than before. The truth, however hard, is that she could make do without any help at all..... In fact, she is making do. You doing something nice is great, but don't let it become a habit.

 

[altonb1]

You could also suggest a dept "Pot Luck" lunch and then let her take the left-overs? If you bring in a large ham, turkey, or something similar, you should definitely have extras that she could take. Just have her bring a few 2-liters in for her portion.