Finding closure with a bully high school teacher

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bas1c

Senior member
Nov 3, 2009
325
1
71
Texashiker said:
I care, thats who.




The suggestion was to do what makes me happy.

So I posted something that could possibly help me deal with the situation.
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Then do the p***y passive aggressive things you have been contemplating (signing him up for porn or whatever) and get it over with. I hope you find happiness and you can finally heal this gaping wound in your soul.
 
alkemyst

alkemyst

No Lifer
Feb 13, 2001
83,769
19
81
Zivic said:
27 yrs this has been eating at you? Holy sh!t you must not have anything else worthwhile in your life to be concerned with. thinned skinned much?
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I am concerned he was actually molested. 3 decades is insane to be still thinking about an abortion/religious issue.
 
Texashiker

Texashiker

Lifer
Dec 18, 2010
18,811
198
106
alkemyst said:
I am concerned he was actually molested.
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Nope, nothing like that ever happened.

I consider what he did as a form of abuse. He used his position of authority to push a certain agenda, and then punished those who did not agree with that agenda.
 
Bubbleawsome

Bubbleawsome

Diamond Member
Apr 14, 2013
4,834
1,204
146
I understand where you are coming from, but who do you think he might be now. He might be a reformed man, or not. He might be an amazing grandfather, or not. But you can't tell, so you shouldn't bother the poor guy.
 
ch33zw1z

ch33zw1z

Lifer
Nov 4, 2004
39,752
20,326
146
Advice? let it go. There's idiots like this all over the place, giving them a second thought is more effort than they deserve..

You won't change him.
 
Kaido

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
51,562
7,238
136
Bubbleawsome said:
I understand where you are coming from, but who do you think he might be now. He might be a reformed man, or not. He might be an amazing grandfather, or not. But you can't tell, so you shouldn't bother the poor guy.
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And even then, is there anything really to reform? It was 1987 (?), the rules were different then. People weren't PC like they are today. They showed us crazy stuff in health class that I never really want to see again either, haha. I don't think that kids necessarily need to be exposed to the abortion video they showed to the OP to get the message across, but it pretty much solidifies in your mind exactly what you'll be doing if you choose to go that route. That's not to say there aren't better ways of doing it, but it was the 80's.

And it's not like it's not worse in college, where professors have tenure, adgenas, budgets, and a never-ending supply of cheap undergrad & grad student slave labor working for them. I have an extended family member who was recently denied a critical job in an extremely narrow field because she chose to go to a different grad school than the professor (a top dude in his limited field) wanted (I think he had a rivalry). He pretty much made sure she'd never go anywhere within the industry. Pretty harsh, but then when you look at legal & other options for fighting it, you essentially end up wasting your life fighting a battle where the opponent has an optimal upper hand. That's life. Pick your battles.
 
IronWing

IronWing

No Lifer
Jul 20, 2001
72,873
33,936
136
Bake a rage cake, eat the whole thing in one sitting, and think of this man as you're sitting on the can. From this day forth, thoughts of this man will bring a grin to your face.
 
Kaido

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
51,562
7,238
136
IronWing said:
Bake a rage cake, eat the whole thing in one sitting, and think of this man as you're sitting on the can. From this day forth, thoughts of this man will bring a grin to your face.
Click to expand...

I've been having a bit of a rough day at work and I'm sitting here laughing to myself now, thanks :biggrin:
 
Daverino

Daverino

Platinum Member
Mar 15, 2007
2,004
1
0
Honestly?

If it were me, I'd write something that was heartfelt, but ultimately petty and personally embarrassing. It would not give me closure in the end. I don't know whether I would send it and I would be bothered either way. I would fantasize that, after sending it, the person reading it would feel genuine remorse and want to tell me what a bad person they were and have them beg for my forgiveness. But in reality, I'd probably either get a dickish reply, making me feel more enraged, or none at all which would leave me in the same state. I totally understand how and what you feel and it's a pretty crappy feeling.

So I feel you shouldn't do anything. More important is finding closure on your own. So I can only give you advice I probably wouldn't be wise enough to take myself: understand that by being friends with your buddy after all these years is all the 'revenge' and 'closure' you'll ever need or want. You did good and he was wrong. The end.
 
Gooberlx2

Gooberlx2

Lifer
May 4, 2001
15,381
6
91
Let it go, man. Holding on to this grudge isn't healthy or worth your time. You said yourself the teacher was a stumbling stone. Just a stumbling stone, not a roadblock to anything you wanted to do in your life...right?
 
zerocool84

zerocool84

Lifer
Nov 11, 2004
36,041
472
126
WOW

If I held a grudge for something that simple for 27 years, I'd think there was something wrong with me.
 
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