"fake" things in movies that piss you off.

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jtvang125

Diamond Member
Nov 10, 2004
5,399
51
91
Fist fights where a person takes numerous bare knuckle punches to the face

Tire screeching when peeling out in dirt/gravel

Humans outrunning a large dog
 

Cerpin Taxt

Lifer
Feb 23, 2005
11,940
542
126
Drop the magazine out of a semi-automatic handgun and it's now empty.

(I will note, however, that I know I've seen this error corrected in more modern action flicks)
 
Feb 6, 2007
16,432
1
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A lot of the things people are complaining about would make movies substantially more boring if they were shown accurately. Hacking a computer system might be fun for the person doing it, but there's literally no one on Earth who legitimately wants to watch a real hacker at work. Oh boy, the code is compiling; this is riveting stuff. Eating, giving birth, driving across town, finding a parking spot... who the fuck wants to watch someone circle a parking lot 5 times then give up, park three blocks away and show up in the next scene all red-faced from having to jog to make it to the meeting on time? There's a reason movies use unrealistic conventions for the passage of time, and it's because the audience demands an engaging story. Drawn out scenes that don't advance the story serve no purpose, even if they are more reflective of real life. Real life is frequently boring; tell me you wouldn't skip that drive across town if you could "movie drive" it and be there in 4 seconds via jump cut.

That said, there are a lot of areas where movies screw the pooch quite badly, including some ludicrous ideas of what hacking is, completely misrepresenting guns in every conceivable manner and the idea that everything in the world will explode if shot in the right place. It makes things more exciting, so I'm willing to forgive most of it, but cars don't blow up just because they got into an accident. It's like filmmakers live in some alternate reality where the Pinto was the basis for all future cars.
 

Saint Nick

Lifer
Jan 21, 2005
17,722
6
81
The Howie Scream is waaay too over used as well. I remember first hearing it in "Aaaah Real Monsters!" back in the mid-90s
 

middlehead

Diamond Member
Jul 11, 2004
4,573
2
81
On a related note, does anyone have a link to that stupid CSI (i think) sketch where 2 people try to counter being hacked by using a keyboard at the same time.

I'm pretty sure that one was NCIS, which is basically everything wrong with television all at once. Fuck that show.
 

DAPUNISHER

Super Moderator CPU Forum Mod and Elite Member
Super Moderator
Aug 22, 2001
29,759
25,171
146
You're right, I was off with that second one. Cocking a gun for emphasis doesn't mean it wasn't in a ready-to-fire state beforehand. I think I even read about a time when a police officer pumped his shotgun (ejecting a perfectly good shell) just to scare a suspect into surrendering.

But the first one is definitely a movie mistake. Semiautomatic pistols will lock the slide back after you fire the last round, and that is sometimes shown correctly in movies. But oftentimes they'll pull the trigger multiple times and make the clicking noise, which wouldn't happen. Or if it was a full auto gun, it'll click a bunch of times in succession.
Guns are always among the worst offenders in movies and TV. BITD they would have a suppressor on a revolver. And Superman would stand, hands on hips while the bad guy dumped 6 rounds, then duck when they threw the gun. Every western used the same report and ricochet audio. Sparks always fly off everything, all the time, from gun fire. You can see where the little charge went off, but there is no damage to the wall, just the scorch mark. The bad guys in the old flicks would jab the gun each time they fired.
 

DAPUNISHER

Super Moderator CPU Forum Mod and Elite Member
Super Moderator
Aug 22, 2001
29,759
25,171
146
Fist fights where a person takes numerous bare knuckle punches to the face
Were you going to finish that? Because IRL cats will take numerous bare knuckled shots to the face. It is harder to KO someone that way, than with gloves on.
 
Jun 19, 2004
10,860
1
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I'm pretty sure that one was NCIS, which is basically everything wrong with television all at once. Fuck that show.

Yeah, that was NCIS. I tried finding video of that about a year ago so I could show a friend, but couldn't find it anywhere online. I hate that show.
 

SagaLore

Elite Member
Dec 18, 2001
24,036
21
81
Nobody ever has to take a potty break. Except when it is a hostage that is actually trying to get away.
 

Tweak155

Lifer
Sep 23, 2003
11,448
262
126
When a movie is already unrealistic but they set their own boundaries, but then do something unrealistic even with their own boundaries.

In other words, we're used to gravity because that is realistic, yet we see stuff happen that defies gravity all the time. That's fine (not really, but the next is worse).

A good example of what I'm referring to is like Independence Day. They set their own unrealistic boundaries (because we've never experienced Aliens) by introducing aliens with certain technology. Yet somehow our computer viruses affect their system that is supposedly 90x advanced compared to ours. Come on.
 

Gooberlx2

Lifer
May 4, 2001
15,381
6
91
Absurdly unrealistic apartments/condos relative to the characters' salaries, especially in NYC, LA, London, Paris, etc...

damn...already mentioned.

Racking a shotgun multiple times....and no shells are ever ejected.
 
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kami333

Diamond Member
Dec 12, 2001
5,110
2
76
DNA results that are ready while you wait.
Chromotographs that automatically identify substances.

And they never balance the centrifuge.
 
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baydude

Senior member
Sep 13, 2011
813
80
91
When everyone mysteriously dies and gets their head chopped off and there's one victim left, instead of running to safety and getting a weapon or something, the victim proceeds to scope out the spooky dark areas in order for the villain to pop out for an attack.
 

JamesV

Platinum Member
Jul 9, 2011
2,002
2
76
I forgot the most obvious...don't know if it was posted yet...

when people raise their guns to fire, and the cocking sound is applied, like the gun magically cocks itself when you raise the barrel.
 

blackdogdeek

Lifer
Mar 14, 2003
14,453
10
81
Someone said this already but nothing breaks my suspension of disbelief quite like the recitation of an obviously fake telephone number.
 

Juddog

Diamond Member
Dec 11, 2006
7,851
6
81
Were you going to finish that? Because IRL cats will take numerous bare knuckled shots to the face. It is harder to KO someone that way, than with gloves on.

^^ True - just look at all those Kimbo Slice videos on youtube.
 

SagaLore

Elite Member
Dec 18, 2001
24,036
21
81
Noise in space. There should be no sounds from laser cannons or photon torpedoes or anything like that.

You shouldn't actually see the lasers either, and they should hit their object instantaneously and not as slow as an unladen swallow.
 

JimKiler

Diamond Member
Oct 10, 2002
3,559
205
106
A lot of the things people are complaining about would make movies substantially more boring if they were shown accurately. Hacking a computer system might be fun for the person doing it, but there's literally no one on Earth who legitimately wants to watch a real hacker at work. Oh boy, the code is compiling; this is riveting stuff. Eating, giving birth, driving across town, finding a parking spot... who the fuck wants to watch someone circle a parking lot 5 times then give up, park three blocks away and show up in the next scene all red-faced from having to jog to make it to the meeting on time? There's a reason movies use unrealistic conventions for the passage of time, and it's because the audience demands an engaging story. Drawn out scenes that don't advance the story serve no purpose, even if they are more reflective of real life. Real life is frequently boring; tell me you wouldn't skip that drive across town if you could "movie drive" it and be there in 4 seconds via jump cut.

That said, there are a lot of areas where movies screw the pooch quite badly, including some ludicrous ideas of what hacking is, completely misrepresenting guns in every conceivable manner and the idea that everything in the world will explode if shot in the right place. It makes things more exciting, so I'm willing to forgive most of it, but cars don't blow up just because they got into an accident. It's like filmmakers live in some alternate reality where the Pinto was the basis for all future cars.

Very true and if the movie is well done via strong acting or script that is engaging, we the viewer can and do overlook most of this stuff. But when we watch bad movies we start nit picking this stuff because we are bored.
 

KeithTalent

Elite Member | Administrator | No Lifer
Administrator
Nov 30, 2005
50,231
117
116
Fake vomiting; looks so ridiculous when they just flub some Maalox out of their mouth.

Look at something like Taxidermia where it is real vomiting; so much better.

KT