Did/Do You Room with your Girlfriend/Boyfriend during College

[BrokenVisage]

Originally posted by: DocHolliday
that's a HORRIBLE idea [/thread]

 

[stan394]

i practically live with my gf during all our college years, moved out and lived together for another 3 years and we are getting married next year

 

[EMPshockwave82]

no and i would refuse to live with a gf during college years... if ANYTHING happens to put the relationship on the rocks it would be way to weird

 

[SMOGZINN]

Originally posted by: stan394

Originally posted by: SMOGZINN

Originally posted by: LadyBuggy

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt

Originally posted by: Duddy
And we never had ANY arguments the ENTIRE TIME.

Dear heavens, reality will fall quite heavily on you... _Never_ marry someone eith whom you haven't had a knock-down, drag-out fight. It _will_ happen eventually. If you've been fake enough to avoid it so far, then there are things you are not dealing with.

ZV

I don't know that I agree with that. My bf and I are both pretty mellow and we have disagreements and sometimes argue, but we've never had an all out fight, and I can't see it happening. We're too good at being grown up and talking about our problems, I guess.

I had been with my GF for over 3 years before we got an apt off campus, and we never had any type of serious arguments. I thought we never could, we were both very good at communicating, and listening to the others complaints, and finding ways to correct the problems. But eventually we did have a real knock-down drag out fight, and it completely broke our relationship.
You see, our relationship had no way to overcome a problem we could not discuss rationally. We both we had learned to compromise but never to truly forgive. When we found a problem that there could be no compromise on, we had no way to resolve the issue, so we just pushed it aside and tried to avoid the topic as often as possible. But these issues never went away they just festered between us, driving us apart slowly. When that final argument came about, they all got dragged out and the accusations flew and feelings were hurt, and it couldn?t be swept under the rug this time. There had to be resolution, but all these things taken together were too much for either of us to forgive all at once. We both ended up loathing the one person that we had ever truly loved and never wanted to hurt, each other.
That was more then two years ago, and I still miss her every day.
I?m not sure what ya?ll can take from this. I have always felt that we can learn from the mistakes of others, and use those lessons to improve our lives. So I give to all of you this lesson: learn to forgive, and use it freely.

would you mind sharing what kind of issue it is? money? religion? family?

It was a bunch of things. Things I had done, things she had done, all of them we had pushed under the rug, but had never really forgiven each other. The final argument was a mix of money and religion. I had lost my 100k+ a year job when Enron fell, and took a job at 20k a year (just to pay bills,) She was not happy with our lifestyle having to take a drastic turn downward, from there the argument proceeded to her telling me that bad things happened to me because I was not Catholic. I never knew she felt that way, and I told her so, and the argument escalated from there. By the end we had each poked at old wounds we had both harbored for years. This fight actually lasted for over a week, each of us starting back at the other as soon as we saw each other. Finally I decided that we just needed some time apart to cool down, and decided to go stay with my folks for a few days. When I came back she had moved into the spare bedroom and would not even talk to me. I tried several times to make up with her, and we had one more good night together, after that she told me that although she still loved me, we could never again be what we were. From that day on, every time we spoke we ended up with angry words.
It took me some time to realize that what she meant was that she could not forgive me and I could not forgive her for things that we had both done in the past and not worked out at that time.
When we fell in love we were too young. We didn?t know how to fix things when they went wrong, so we avoided them. We never learnt the lessons others learn with break-ups and make-ups over the years. How do you forgive someone for something that you have been mad about for 10 years? We had things that we were still angry with each other over from high school. How do you make up for something after all those years? How do you make up for all the mistakes you made while learning to live and love, learning to be independent, and interdependent? How do you make up for all that when they were all done to one person?

 

[imported_nautique]

lived with my gf for 2 years in college. still together a year later. If you can deal then go for it

 

[PinmasterJay]

I did my first year of college and at the time we had been together for almost 2 years,
and we ended up breaking up by april and had to finish out the school year then break our lease

Believe me its not a good idea because you never know how much college will
change you and its something you need to just experience living on your own.

This was three years ago and to this day I believe I might still be with her
had we not lived together and just experience college living seperately

 

[Apathetic]

I knew several people who decided to room with their boy/girlfriend. Trust me - it's a REALLY bad idea.

1) You NEED some time and space away from your significant other. Living together, you won't have that.
2) What happens if you break up? It's way to hard/wierd living with your ex.

Dave

 

[Saint Nick]

yes, and we have sex all the time. i'll post pics later.

edit: not of me of course......

 

[spaceman]

i lived in a girls dorm for 6 months

 

[Parrotheader]

I started dating my future wife my senior year of high school. But we lived in separate apartments in college. Granted, she'd sometimes come over and spend the night(s) a lot and vice versa.

But I'm glad we didn't officially live together. First of all, her parents would have never allowed it. Secondly, I LIKED having that freedom and my own space. Without a doubt having my own space allowed me to fully enjoy some of the most fun years of my life. It was the best of both worlds. I could do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted because I had my own space. But I also could have my girlfriend over anytime I wanted and 'live' with each other for brief periods of time.

 

[Judgement]

Why would you ever want to live with the girl you're dating while in college?

Just get her to sleep over whenever you feel like it and then you can avoid all the mess complications.

 

[Aquila76]

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha

I give you 2 months of living with her before one of you dumps the other one.

ZV

Someone famous once sad, "The best way to end a relationship is to move in together."

 

[homestarmy]

Originally posted by: Duddy
My dad says he has never heard of it. Help me prove him wrong.

Also, if you did, how did it go?

Your poll should have a third option that reads "I did not have a girlfriend". Realistically, most people are choosing No because they never had a girlfriend in college (and likely do not have one now ). Seriously though, if you want a higher percentage of yes, that's what you need.

 

[Accipiter22]

what everyone here is saying....what if you guys break up....then you have to be a L-L-L-L-L-L-LEASE BREAKER....breaker.....breaker.....breaker.....

 

[homestarmy]

Originally posted by: Duddy

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha

I give you 2 months of living with her before one of you dumps the other one.

ZV

Actually, we plan on marrying and have been together for over a year now. She is going to be a doctor and I'm going to be an IT.

Then I think it will be OK for you. It is a different story if you are with some skanky ho ho ho that you met in a bar that is probably bipolar etc.

My girlfriend and I lived together off and on at my dad's place for about a year while we both started at community college. Then I moved about 150 miles away to university, we were apart for a bit, then after a semster she moved in with me and we stayed together in university sponsored housing with another roommate. We stayed together for the rest of the year, then got our own apartment locally together. We lived together there for a year, and then purchased our own home and have lived there together for two years (minus some time that she had to watch her father's house for him in our home town - he was away in Afganistan for the war).

Well, we have been living together now for around 4 years give or take total. Things are going well, and we are less engaged toward marriage than you and your girlfriend seem to be. I don't see any reason why there would be a problem if you are secure in your relationship, intimate, and have no quirks (such as either of you being some kind of freak that requires therapy daily).

 

[blakeatwork]

I didn't myself, but I had friends that did, especially the out of towners...

nothing wrong with it, but if you break up mid-semester, be prepared for all kinds on unholy hell..

and your other flatmates trying to bone in on your ex.

 

[homestarmy]

Originally posted by: Accipiter22
what everyone here is saying....what if you guys break up....then you have to be a L-L-L-L-L-L-LEASE BREAKER....breaker.....breaker.....breaker.....

Just make sure that you have enough dough to cover the lease if something happens. If you don't, you shouldn't be getting an apartment in the first place.

 

[roguerower]

PICS?

Won't work out b/c even though it's all "perfect" now, you're gonna say something one day, she's gonna snap, and then the barbecue will begin.

 

[homestarmy]

Originally posted by: SMOGZINN

Originally posted by: stan394

Originally posted by: SMOGZINN

Originally posted by: LadyBuggy

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt

Originally posted by: Duddy
And we never had ANY arguments the ENTIRE TIME.

Dear heavens, reality will fall quite heavily on you... _Never_ marry someone eith whom you haven't had a knock-down, drag-out fight. It _will_ happen eventually. If you've been fake enough to avoid it so far, then there are things you are not dealing with.

ZV

I don't know that I agree with that. My bf and I are both pretty mellow and we have disagreements and sometimes argue, but we've never had an all out fight, and I can't see it happening. We're too good at being grown up and talking about our problems, I guess.

I had been with my GF for over 3 years before we got an apt off campus, and we never had any type of serious arguments. I thought we never could, we were both very good at communicating, and listening to the others complaints, and finding ways to correct the problems. But eventually we did have a real knock-down drag out fight, and it completely broke our relationship.
You see, our relationship had no way to overcome a problem we could not discuss rationally. We both we had learned to compromise but never to truly forgive. When we found a problem that there could be no compromise on, we had no way to resolve the issue, so we just pushed it aside and tried to avoid the topic as often as possible. But these issues never went away they just festered between us, driving us apart slowly. When that final argument came about, they all got dragged out and the accusations flew and feelings were hurt, and it couldn?t be swept under the rug this time. There had to be resolution, but all these things taken together were too much for either of us to forgive all at once. We both ended up loathing the one person that we had ever truly loved and never wanted to hurt, each other.
That was more then two years ago, and I still miss her every day.
I?m not sure what ya?ll can take from this. I have always felt that we can learn from the mistakes of others, and use those lessons to improve our lives. So I give to all of you this lesson: learn to forgive, and use it freely.

would you mind sharing what kind of issue it is? money? religion? family?

It was a bunch of things. Things I had done, things she had done, all of them we had pushed under the rug, but had never really forgiven each other. The final argument was a mix of money and religion. I had lost my 100k+ a year job when Enron fell, and took a job at 20k a year (just to pay bills,) She was not happy with our lifestyle having to take a drastic turn downward, from there the argument proceeded to her telling me that bad things happened to me because I was not Catholic. I never knew she felt that way, and I told her so, and the argument escalated from there. By the end we had each poked at old wounds we had both harbored for years. This fight actually lasted for over a week, each of us starting back at the other as soon as we saw each other. Finally I decided that we just needed some time apart to cool down, and decided to go stay with my folks for a few days. When I came back she had moved into the spare bedroom and would not even talk to me. I tried several times to make up with her, and we had one more good night together, after that she told me that although she still loved me, we could never again be what we were. From that day on, every time we spoke we ended up with angry words.
It took me some time to realize that what she meant was that she could not forgive me and I could not forgive her for things that we had both done in the past and not worked out at that time.
When we fell in love we were too young. We didn?t know how to fix things when they went wrong, so we avoided them. We never learnt the lessons others learn with break-ups and make-ups over the years. How do you forgive someone for something that you have been mad about for 10 years? We had things that we were still angry with each other over from high school. How do you make up for something after all those years? How do you make up for all the mistakes you made while learning to live and love, learning to be independent, and interdependent? How do you make up for all that when they were all done to one person?

I don't mean to be a complete dick, but google and read about the ladder theory. You were no longer making 100k, so she decided to go out and find someone else who could carry her weight. That's the way women work, unfortunately.

 

[lepper boy]

Originally posted by: ngvepforever2
do it and you'll be back in two weeks crying and ranting about it.

Regards

ng

When I first read this, I thought it said "Retard" not "regards"

much funnier as retard..

 

[yhelothar]

Originally posted by: Duddy

Originally posted by: Lonyo

Originally posted by: Duddy

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha

I give you 2 months of living with her before one of you dumps the other one.

ZV

Actually, we plan on marrying and have been together for over a year now. She is going to be a doctor and I'm going to be an IT.

Wow, you've been together a whole year, must be serious :roll:
Dude, a frickin' year, you haven't been to college yet, you're thinking of marriage, you're full of BS, and YOU HAVEN'T BEEN TO COLLEGE YET.
Seriously, how much of life do you truely know? IMO it's stupid to move in with her, then break up, find you're both screwed in terms of living arrangements, and then you'll come here and whine your life is over.
It's not gonna be good for you.
It's not gonna be good for her.
It's not gonna be good for your dad (except he gets to say "I told you so")
And last but DEFINATELY not least:
It's not going to be good for US on this board having to listen to your whining when you realise we were right and you're screwed.

I'm already a year into college. And we never had ANY arguments the ENTIRE TIME. And we don't drink or smoke. She also loves to play Halo 2. She also taught ME about the joy of torrents.

Uh not having any arguments IS A BAD THING. It means you guys aren't telling each other things. In an absolutely healthy relationship, there will be arguments that goes on. It's essential to clearing up conflicts. If you don't argue, then your conflicts will just build up inside you, until one day, one of you can't take it anymore, and you will break up.
Don't tell me that you don't have any conflicts with her either. Because deep down inside, it's inevitable. No relationship is perfect.

 

[shilala]

You're not old enough to make that decision, you insignifigant little turd.
Listen to your father, or move out and pay your own way through college.
That'll teach him who's boss.

 

[MaxDepth]

Hey you little twerp -

This is not the girl you will take to homecoming.
This is not the girl you will meet at a bar then take home and snog.
This is not the girl you will see in a classroom and hook up after the second date.
This is not the girl you will see at a party and make out in a dark corner.
This is not the girl you will play volleyball against and then collect the winner's bet.
This is not the girl you will marry.


I have dated more girls than I can care to count on since high school. I got engaged after college but that fell through. I've lived with several girls: while dating them, just as friends then dated, as fvck buddies, and some just to share rent. Your hormones are making you say things that later on will seem really juevenile.

Go to school. Study hard. Work hard. Play hard. The girls will follow.

To put it bluntly - she will dump you in the first year.

 

[WildHorse]

 

Bad idea dude...bad idea...