Condoms, wtf is up with that shiet?

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Looney

Lifer
Jun 13, 2000
21,938
5
0
Originally posted by: isaacmacdonald
Originally posted by: MaxDSP
Originally posted by: geckojohn
Just use the pull-out method

this couild be a quote~

LOL...I see a thread next week..."ahhhh, fuX0rs, she=teh pregnant"

not really. I usually alternate between condoms and pull out (for the last 3 years) no problem so far. Still it's a bit of a ghetto solution. I want some freakin' techonology.

There's lots. Get her tubes tied. Get yours tied. The Pill. Diaphragm. Contraceptive sponge. I'm sure there are more that i'm not familiar with as well.
 

MaxDSP

Lifer
May 15, 2001
10,056
0
71
Originally posted by: Moralpanic
Originally posted by: geckojohn
Just use the pull-out method

this couild be a quote~

LOL I had a girl that loved the pull out method... she liked getting the hot jizzed on her chest for some odd reason.

a bit higher up and you could have given her a pearl necklace...:beer::D:beer:
 

her209

No Lifer
Oct 11, 2000
56,336
11
0
Originally posted by: MaxDSP
Originally posted by: Moralpanic
Originally posted by: geckojohn
Just use the pull-out method

this couild be a quote~

LOL I had a girl that loved the pull out method... she liked getting the hot jizzed on her chest for some odd reason.

a bit higher up and you could have given her a pearl necklace...:beer::D:beer:
IHE
 

Deuce24

Senior member
May 22, 2003
354
0
0
Originally posted by: isaacmacdonald
Originally posted by: Deuce24
Just pull a Hot Karl, no condom necessary ;) heh

wth does that mean?

Don't ask me why someone would want to do this, but it is one of many scenarios that are sick as hell, but are so funny you can't help but bring them up whenever you can.

Hot Karl - put a piece of saran-wrap over your partner's mouth, and poke it down into it with your finger. Next you place your naked ass over their mouth and drop a hefty log inside.

Again, not sure why someone would do this, lol but it is one of many funny "scenarios."
 

Ciber

Platinum Member
Nov 20, 2000
2,531
30
91
Originally posted by: isaacmacdonald
Am I the only one that hates condoms? Seems to me that there's a huge differnce between wearing a plastic bag and going au natural. It sucks because you obviously want to be safe with new aquaintances, but it really diminishes the sensations of the experience. The other thing is the actual application of the condom has always seemed awkward to me. It's like you're going along fine and then, wait a sec, I've got to roll this vinyl thing just right.

-not to enthusiastic about the whole condom thing-

I thought you were engaged to some asian chick? Ask her to get on the pill.
 

Linux23

Lifer
Apr 9, 2000
11,374
741
126
just knock her up. when she's pregnant you won't have to use a condom for 9 months. :p
 

MaxDSP

Lifer
May 15, 2001
10,056
0
71
Originally posted by: her209
Originally posted by: MaxDSP
Originally posted by: Moralpanic
Originally posted by: geckojohn
Just use the pull-out method

this couild be a quote~

LOL I had a girl that loved the pull out method... she liked getting the hot jizzed on her chest for some odd reason.

a bit higher up and you could have given her a pearl necklace...:beer::D:beer:
IHE

IHE?!? :confused:
 
Aug 16, 2001
22,505
4
81
Originally posted by: MaxDSP
Originally posted by: her209
Originally posted by: MaxDSP
Originally posted by: Moralpanic
Originally posted by: geckojohn
Just use the pull-out method

this couild be a quote~

LOL I had a girl that loved the pull out method... she liked getting the hot jizzed on her chest for some odd reason.

a bit higher up and you could have given her a pearl necklace...:beer::D:beer:
IHE

IHE?!? :confused:

In Her Eye

 

schizoid

Banned
May 27, 2000
2,207
1
0
dude...

I can't believe we're talking about pooping on chests...and I'm not somehow involved!


PS: I pooped on Thumper's chest once.

It was hot.

I like going around the world.

And finishing up in the mouth.

Yes.
 

ThaGrandCow

Diamond Member
Dec 27, 2001
7,956
2
0
Originally posted by: isaacmacdonald
Am I the only one that hates condoms? Seems to me that there's a huge differnce between wearing a plastic bag and going au natural. It sucks because you obviously want to be safe with new aquaintances, but it really diminishes the sensations of the experience. The other thing is the actual application of the condom has always seemed awkward to me. It's like you're going along fine and then, wait a sec, I've got to roll this vinyl thing just right.

-not to enthusiastic about the whole condom thing-

The pill + monogamy + both get tested first = good to go my good man. Welcome to my world :D
 

Siddhartha

Lifer
Oct 17, 1999
12,505
3
81
Originally posted by: isaacmacdonald
Am I the only one that hates condoms? Seems to me that there's a huge differnce between wearing a plastic bag and going au natural. It sucks because you obviously want to be safe with new aquaintances, but it really diminishes the sensations of the experience. The other thing is the actual application of the condom has always seemed awkward to me. It's like you're going along fine and then, wait a sec, I've got to roll this vinyl thing just right.

-not to enthusiastic about the whole condom thing-

Safer sex is better than no sex at all...

 

Ronstang

Lifer
Jul 8, 2000
12,493
18
81
Originally posted by: ThaGrandCow
Originally posted by: isaacmacdonald
Am I the only one that hates condoms? Seems to me that there's a huge differnce between wearing a plastic bag and going au natural. It sucks because you obviously want to be safe with new aquaintances, but it really diminishes the sensations of the experience. The other thing is the actual application of the condom has always seemed awkward to me. It's like you're going along fine and then, wait a sec, I've got to roll this vinyl thing just right.

-not to enthusiastic about the whole condom thing-

The pill + monogamy + both get tested first = good to go my good man. Welcome to my world :D
That is all fine and dandy as long as she doesn't let another car park in her garage.

 

Xionide

Diamond Member
Apr 20, 2002
8,679
2
81
Man I got this link to a site with the "disgusting dictionary", its so fvcked up im not even gonna post it. Its the worst thing known to man.

-Xionide
 

Looney

Lifer
Jun 13, 2000
21,938
5
0
Originally posted by: Xionide
Man I got this link to a site with the "disgusting dictionary", its so fvcked up im not even gonna post it. Its the worst thing known to man.

-Xionide

Got what?
 

Stallion

Diamond Member
May 4, 2000
3,657
0
76
I got the big V last year. Now I can shoot my load everytime. It was painless and only took 10 minutes. Go do it now!;)
 

ThaGrandCow

Diamond Member
Dec 27, 2001
7,956
2
0
Originally posted by: Stallion
I got the big V last year. Now I can shoot my load everytime. It was painless and only took 10 minutes. Go do it now!;)

Dear lord, please forgive this man for committing the ultimte sin. He was not himself at the time, the devil had him before and during the operation. Please rain down your firey, horrible vengance on him and then allow him once again into your good graces once again.
Amen.
PS: Could you send me some more beer and hookers?
 

ThaGrandCow

Diamond Member
Dec 27, 2001
7,956
2
0
Originally posted by: Stallion
I got the big V last year. Now I can shoot my load everytime. It was painless and only took 10 minutes. Go do it now!;)

You know... I was just thinking that someone that is telling us that he had the operation that is the equivalent of getting his nuts chopped off really shouldn't be using the name "Stallion," I think "Gelding" would be a bit better.
 

Deuce24

Senior member
May 22, 2003
354
0
0
Another great scenario:

The Proc Special - You're doing your girl doggy from behind, and while you're doing her you save a bunch of saliva in your mouth. Just as you're getting ready to blow your load, you pull out and seal off your trouser snake and spit on her back so she thinks you came on her. As she turns around from the doggy position you let your load go right in her face.

Mad props to Proc, a Starcraft player I ran across back in the day, been laughing over this one ever since. More to come! ;) (pun intended of course)
 

Stallion

Diamond Member
May 4, 2000
3,657
0
76
Originally posted by: Deuce24
Another great scenario:

The Proc Special - You're doing your girl doggy from behind, and while you're doing her you save a bunch of saliva in your mouth. Just as you're getting ready to blow your load, you pull out and seal off your trouser snake and spit on her back so she thinks you came on her. As she turns around from the doggy position you let your load go right in her face.

Mad props to Proc, a Starcraft player I ran across back in the day, been laughing over this one ever since. More to come! ;) (pun intended of course)


"Seal off your trouser snake" How the hell you do that, stick your finger in the end of it?


BTW, GrandCow. I'll always be a Stallion, just ask my wife.
;)