"You're a great guy, a fantastic father, great provider ... but I just don't love you anymore. I don't know if I ever did."
That's what I heard from my wife of 7 years, and the mother of my 2 children (2 & 4) friday night
WTF? Where do I go from here??
Actually, I first heard that back in April ... just blurted it out in the middle of dinner. I asked her to go to counseling with me ... we did for awhile ... about 5 sessions. The doc loaded it all off on me basically ... that all our problems were a result of my depression (I've had problems with depression off & on since my teens) and spending to much time on a large project we undertook together. I had my doubts, but she jumped right on that bandwagon. At least it got us talking, and things seemed to be going better for awhile.
Insurance coverage on the counseling ran out, and she suggested we stop for awhile as things seemed to be getting better. I should have pushed it, but I guess I was feeling better also. My depression comes and goes ... it hasn't been severe since my early 20s, and I've felt really good the last few weeks. I've been trying my damdest at everything that came up in counseling, but I saw her slipping back, but she wouldn't talk about it. Then I took her out to dinner for her birthday at a very nice, small, expensive resteraunt (I've been accused of being cheap), and she drops this bomb on me again and suggests that she's thinking about leaving me. I left half of my meal on the table ... I felt to sick to finish it.
So, I haven't slept more then an hour or so a night since Thursday. She says there is nothing I can do ... that it's just something she has to work out for herself. She's going to see our counselor by herself this thursday, and has been hostile to the idea of going together again. To me it feels like she's just going through the motions ... that she's already decided to leave. She won't talk about where the kids fit into this. I haven't found any sign that she's cheating ... and I've asked her directly.
And here's the kicker ... it just dawned on me in the middle of the night. I think I know what she's waiting for. She's originally from S. America, and we are going down to visit her family over Christmas ... I can only take about 2 weeks, but she's planning on 3 weeks ... with the kids. I'm guessing she won't come back. Or won't come back with the kids. And I'll be left divorced, bankrupt, and with little chance of ever seeing my kids again.
I have to find their passports tonight. I can't believe I'm even thinking this way, but I'll sleep better if I have their passports.
I know I'm just asking for it posting this on ATOT ... but I just needed some forum to get this out.
Thanks for listening
Armitage
That's what I heard from my wife of 7 years, and the mother of my 2 children (2 & 4) friday night
WTF? Where do I go from here??
Actually, I first heard that back in April ... just blurted it out in the middle of dinner. I asked her to go to counseling with me ... we did for awhile ... about 5 sessions. The doc loaded it all off on me basically ... that all our problems were a result of my depression (I've had problems with depression off & on since my teens) and spending to much time on a large project we undertook together. I had my doubts, but she jumped right on that bandwagon. At least it got us talking, and things seemed to be going better for awhile.
Insurance coverage on the counseling ran out, and she suggested we stop for awhile as things seemed to be getting better. I should have pushed it, but I guess I was feeling better also. My depression comes and goes ... it hasn't been severe since my early 20s, and I've felt really good the last few weeks. I've been trying my damdest at everything that came up in counseling, but I saw her slipping back, but she wouldn't talk about it. Then I took her out to dinner for her birthday at a very nice, small, expensive resteraunt (I've been accused of being cheap), and she drops this bomb on me again and suggests that she's thinking about leaving me. I left half of my meal on the table ... I felt to sick to finish it.
So, I haven't slept more then an hour or so a night since Thursday. She says there is nothing I can do ... that it's just something she has to work out for herself. She's going to see our counselor by herself this thursday, and has been hostile to the idea of going together again. To me it feels like she's just going through the motions ... that she's already decided to leave. She won't talk about where the kids fit into this. I haven't found any sign that she's cheating ... and I've asked her directly.
And here's the kicker ... it just dawned on me in the middle of the night. I think I know what she's waiting for. She's originally from S. America, and we are going down to visit her family over Christmas ... I can only take about 2 weeks, but she's planning on 3 weeks ... with the kids. I'm guessing she won't come back. Or won't come back with the kids. And I'll be left divorced, bankrupt, and with little chance of ever seeing my kids again.
I have to find their passports tonight. I can't believe I'm even thinking this way, but I'll sleep better if I have their passports.
I know I'm just asking for it posting this on ATOT ... but I just needed some forum to get this out.
Thanks for listening
Armitage
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