YAGT.

[AntaresVI]

Originally posted by: Danman

Originally posted by: Gothgar
everything should be clear to you now, you know what to do.

Fvck her mom.

trust me, you would not hit it

 

[mikebb]

Here's my take on this:

Originally posted by: AntaresVI
This is going to sound ridiculous. You have been warned.

I went out with this girl for three years, and she was amazing. The best times of my life were spent with her, we were each other's first loves, etc. I never planned for an end to it.

So this year we both go to college, five hours away from wach other. We kept it going, and for a while it was fine. We had been used to some seperation because she lived two hours away from me in the summers. We visited at college, so it wasnt liek we hadn't seen each other for five months.

Here's where the trouble started. I don't think I've ever met anyone who made a college long-distance relationship last more than 6 months. Not to knock you for trying...

Two months ago, things started getting a little weird - she started to tell me how it was not ok for me to have girls alone in my room (I live on a coed floor), and she told me she wasnt ok with me drinking.

She's starting to feel guilty here. Chances are she's been to a few parties, gotten a little more intoxicated than she should have, and maybe done 1 or 2 stupid things with guys. Including inviting them to her room possibly. (Basically, the things that she is admonishing you not to do.) She probably isn't cheating yet, just enjoying her "freedom"

Instead of trying to talk about it and convince her that these were normal and that I deserved her trust, I was upset that she did not trust me. We would argue for hours on the phone, but somehow I always thought it would work out OK. We stayed together through the arguments, and there were definately bright spots in there.

She's holding on to you "just in case." At some point she's met another guy that she's interested in.

Fast forward to thanksgiving break. I meet her for coffee and she says that "we can never work again." At the moment, I'm upset with her, so I let it go and dont think anything of it. We talk, and finish out coffees and say goodnight. A few days later, back at school, i call her up and she finally tells me that she has a new boyfriend. I, of course, am stunned, first of all because I thought that we could still work things out, and secondly because even if we were broken up, I thought it would take more time for her to get over our three-year relationship than four days. It certainly is taking me longer.

Well, her guilt has finally gotten the better of her, but she doesn't know how to handle it. So she comes right out with it to try and make a clean break.

Anyway being the guy i am, i sent her some emails in which I asked her to think through things and I also asked her to please explain why she did what she did. She just got more angry, and it all came to a head yesterday when she decided to tell me that her family hates me (I always respected and liked them) and they never did think i was good guy, and she hates me and never wants to hear or see from me again. The last words she said to me were "I only have one thing to say to your despicable face before I never see it again...fvck you."

She doesn't know how to deal with the fact that you're a nice guy, and that when she told you she met someone else that you didn't tell her to fvck off. Your understanding is just making her feel more guilty about the whole thing, so she vents with anger. "You're an a$$hole for being too nice."

I guess that helped in a way, because I was having a lot of trouble getting over her because i still thought of her as the nicest, sweetest person I had ever known. She was, for a long time. I just don't know where he hostility and everythign came from, and it really confuses me. The worst part, though, is knowing (as she said) that she wil never remember me as a good guy, and will never remember our time together fondly. I always wanted to remember her well, because the time we spent was honestly the best time i have had. We always said that no matter where we go, no matter who we're with, there will be a little part of our hearts that will always remember each other. It makes me feel worse than I have ever felt to know that that is not true for her.

Don't let her not knowing how to deal with the situation ruin your memories of her. Chances are, she's still the same girl; she just didn't know how to make a tough situation easier, so she took it out on you. Trust me, a lot of women do this, the couple of g/f's that broke it off with me came off as real b!tches because they couldn't deal with me being a nice guy, and the breakup being their "fault."

Thanks for listening to my babbling.

Matt

So that's just my opinion on this, bottom line is it's cool to feel down about breaking up now, but don't EVER start thinking that any of this was your fault, better not to think about reasons at all. Just mourn, get over it in time, and enjoy college. Time to start doing all those things she didn't want you doing!

 

[Grunt03]

You are young and this should not be your last realationship, remember of the good times you had and forget the @itch.
I would go tell her parents that "I hit that".........

 

[Stark]

Originally posted by: AntaresVI

Originally posted by: Danman

Originally posted by: Gothgar
everything should be clear to you now, you know what to do.

Fvck her mom.

trust me, you would not hit it

well see? there you go! All women eventually become their moms. you just saved yourself a miserable future with a moo-cow!

the F.U. letter after a first-love breakup generally means that someone was really, really hurt and tried to throw that hurt back on the person causing them pain. It sucks, but it meant she really cared for you deep down.

It will be hard, but you should leave it alone for now and move on. Don't even talk to her. Chances are things aren't going to last between her and the new guy and you'll haunt their relationship until it crumbles.

If you ignore her, she'll eventually come crawling back and you can... well you know. It will never work out in the long run or course, but you may have a few times re-kindling things.

Now go find your rebound girl (the drunk who spent the night sounds promising... and it would be sweet revenge if word got back to you ex). And whatever you do, DON'T TRY TO WIN HER BACK! DO NOT CALL HER!

 

[bleeb]

Originally posted by: Darkstar757
MAN FSCK These hoes

You dont need them

How you doin' with the hoes big dawg??

 

[Koing]

Chin up dude and she sounds harsh.

I think deep down she didn't want to make the relationship work once she was in College and met new people

Chin up and :beer: and go have some fun.

Koing