YAGT: So my girlfriend wants to make "new" friends...

[Iron Addict]

Couple months back, my girlfriend of 3 years, met a guy through one of her guy friends... Since then, they talked here and there at her work and found that they have another mutual friend... Now last week, he asked her to chill with him "1 on 1" and go out to dinner.. and she already said "yes"... Yesterday, she mentions that she's going out with this dude on Wednesday and i said no. Now she's all pissed and bitching about it... It's not like i dont let her hang out with guy friends, but this "new" guy just dont seem right logically... I already said i dont want her to go see him.. if she stills goes out with him ima break this long relationship off... what are ur thoughts..

UPDATE #1
I man'ned up and pour out my heart to bitch the fvck out of her after 2-3hrs of her nagging. She got more mad later but eventually got scared to see how pissed I was. Now, she's trying to say things in "nice" way... Btw, she says she's not gonna go see the dude anymore..

UPDATE #2
I took yowolabi's advice and tried to come out very calm and try to express how i feel. I told her that i felt it was very disrespectful for her to make a plan with a guy that i dont even know or she barely knows. I said it was one's responsibility to have a ground of mutual respect when it comes to matters like this and she should have known better. I told her it would've been okay if i knew the guy and gave her a "green" light first then made plans with him. She agreed and apologized. Yet, im only 75% sure this won't happen again seeing how she lacks common sense and easily swayed by others. Nonetheless, she is still mad about fact that i was too aggressive and mean yesterday and called her current male friends not her "true" friends.

UPDATE #3
After some more talks, I have convinced her that her behavior and decision were totally unacceptable. We have come to an agreement that she will never go "chill" with some dude unless I know the dude and approve of him.
I wholeheartly thank everyone here that gave me sound advices which brought this to a peaceful end. Thank you ATOT!

 

[Zim Hosein]

Originally posted by: Iron Addict
Couple months back, my girlfriend of 3 years, met a guy through one of her guy friends... Since then, they talked here and there at her work and found that they have another mutual friend... Now last week, he asked her to chill with him "1 on 1" and go out to dinner.. and she already said "yes"... Yesterday, she mentions that she's going out with this dude on Wednesday and i said no. Now she's all pissed and bitching about it... It's not like i dont let her hang out with guy friends, but this "new" guy just dont seem right logically... I already said i dont want her to go see him.. if she stills goes out with him ima break this long relationship off... what are ur thoughts..

<-- Points and :laugh:s

 

[MazerRackham]

How about option C. It's about to be over soon so you might as well break up with her.

Sorry dude, but you are headed to Aloneville, Population: You.

 

[hypn0tik]

1) You have trust issues

2) She will end up cheating on you

Pick one

 

[Ulfhednar]

I would vote for a "go out with them" option if there was one, maybe you want to make new friends too. If she vehemently protests, then I would be highly suspicious.

 

[AreaCode707]

Since he specifically asked her to go one on one, I would say this smells fishy. Probably not from her side but from his, which makes it all the harder for you to convince her. If he truly wants to be friends with her, he should be fine hanging out in a group. If that group interaction later evolves naturally into a one on one situation, no issue. But he's making a point of it, and that raises my eyebrow.

 

[MartyMcFly3]

I wish I was in a loving and trusting relationship like you are...

:roll:

 

[JonTheBaller]

pimp her out to that dude for some easy cash.

 

[Iron Addict]

Originally posted by: hypn0tik
1) You have trust issues

2) She will end up cheating on you

Pick one

You may not believe me, i trust her with the hottest guy in the world... it's the dude's motive that i dont trust..

She won't cheat on me.. she will just break off the relationship if she wants to..

 

[GalvanizedYankee]

Originally posted by: MazerRackham
How about option C. It's about to be over soon so you might as well break up with her.

Sorry dude, but you are headed to Aloneville, Population: You.

Yep! GFT

Cut and run dude.


...Galvanized

 

[AreaCode707]

Clarifying my answer, her intentions are probably honest and she's pissed that you don't trust her judgment. Explain exactly and clearly why you aren't comfortable with the situation and ask her, as a favor, to just wait a while before she goes anywhere with the guy one on one. Encourage her to go out one on one with one of her other guy friends who you trust and ask his opinion as well. That has the advantage of you displaying trust in her and getting some affirmation for your opinion.

 

[Kirby]

Originally posted by: JonTheBaller
pimp her out to that dude for some easy cash.

:laugh:

 

[MartyMcFly3]

Originally posted by: Iron Addict

Originally posted by: hypn0tik
1) You have trust issues

2) She will end up cheating on you

Pick one

You may not believe me, i trust her with the hottest guy in the world... it's the dude's motive that i dont trust..

She won't cheat on me.. she will just break off the relationship if she wants to..

If you trust her like you say and think she wont cheat on you, it shouldn't matter if she hangs with a guy one-on-one then.

 

[frankgomez75]

oh hell no! I see you in an upcoming episode of "Cheaters" if you're not careful. If she feels strongly in going out with this other "NEW" person, than its time you start making plans to move on. This is a sign of bad things to come. She's gonna have to choose what's more important, hanging with "NEW" guy friends alone, or respecting your wishes. Seriously, no joking... I'd most definetly put my foot down and if she insists, than you need to make new "girl" friends and go out with them ONE-ON-One... insurance FTW!

 

[Ronstang]

Anyone in a serious relationship has no business going out to a "1 on 1" dinner with someone of the opposite sex they have recently met. If they do then the current relationship is already toast from their point of view.

 

[her209]

How old are you?

 

[dxkj]

She has already cheated on you

 

[michaels]

Any person that respects their SO wouldn't be hanging out with members of the opposite sex all the time, it just isn't right. she is getting banged left and right i'm sure.

 

[OneOfTheseDays]

Women cheat. Yes there are exceptions to the rule, but by and large most women will cheat if the opportunity is right. If your game is tight enough you can get just about any woman to drop her panties.

Your GF is clearly expressing a desire to seek out others besides you. She's bored with you and she wants to try something new. I say cut your losses and move on, if you two are really meant to be together she will come back to you.

And please do not listen to the advice of any women here on this board. Women are not logical creatures, they are driven by their emotions more than anything. If your GF starts developing feelings for this guy she is not going to surpress them forever. Sooner or later she will act on them and you will feel like a complete chump.

 

[Rage187]

Originally posted by: dxkj
She has already cheated on you

QFT


she just thought she would ask your permission to screw the other guy again. Just because you say no doesn't mean she isn't going to do the other guy anymore.

 

[BobDaMenkey]

I wouldn't have much hope of saving it at this point. Cut n run man, it's over.

 

[T9D]

Geez man this wreaks of trouble and drama. Dont be a gullable fool. Stand up and be a man. One on one? What the hell..... seriously. You should always be invited. She sounds like one of the girls that wont let go of the last person until she has something new in her hands (which is pretty much every women). This has bad news written all over it. Get ready for a rollercoaster ride. Film it all you might be able to sell it off as a day time soap opera.

And if you dont think it bothers you now.... it will.... a lot. It will only get worse.

Also dont be so trusting of women. It's ok to be a little suspicious once in a while and keep your eyes open. It's unbelievable how many women cheat. Dont give them so much credit. I've hung around a lot of married or taken women and I'd be pissed if I was their SO and heard them say the things they say to me. It's a good thing I respect their relationships.

 

[Ronstang]

Originally posted by: Rage187

Originally posted by: dxkj
She has already cheated on you

QFT


she just thought she would ask your permission to screw the other guy again. Just because you say no doesn't mean she isn't going to do the other guy anymore.

Unfortuntately this is more than likely the case. You see woman are cowards and never leave a guy until they have a new one to buy them ****** and inflate their ego. She is on a "test drive" to determine if you are being traded in. You are definitley being traded in but maybe not for this guy.

 

[michaels]

She is probably being bent over his computer desk right now.

 

[tfinch2]

LOL @ her thinking she has the right to 1 on 1 relationships while in a long-term relationship with someone already. Can't have your cake and eat it too missy.